Coping with Hope
by Laurenke1
Summary: Returning to Hogwarts after defeating Voldemort how will Harry Potter cope with the normal classes, death eaters who want revenge, private lessons wth Snape and wounded friends when he can barely cope with himself? AU warning. Slash. SSHP
1. Saving

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: So one story is ending and that means writing another story for me. I know many of you fear that this might be similar to what I have written but it won't be. **

**Summary: Returning for his seventh year might be hard for Harry Potter. How do you deal with the normality of classes, death eaters who want revenge and friends who suffered deep mental wounds to when you can barely cope with yourself? An unexpected survival of ex spy who might be the only one to understand you will be hard for Harry Potter as he learns to cope. **

**Warnings: Violence, languish, slash of course. **

**Title: Coping with hope**

**Author: Laurenke1. **

The messy haired, green eyed younger man stumbled hastily in the morning light that shone brightly over the ground of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The ground had been streaked with hexes only last night and the castle was partly destroyed but Harry Potter, arms full of various potion bottles couldn't care less.

He was only trying to reach the Whomping Willow, the only pass way to the Shrieking Shack and it was so important that he got there in time. Time was against him, he couldn't realize he hadn't send somebody sooner, though he had been a little distracted.

He staggered in his exhaustion but he pressed on. He was panting by the time he reached the tree which did its best to give him a wallop. Harry cursed at himself. Why hadn't he thought to bring somebody else along but he had to do this alone. He knew it.

He could be too late and the fact that he didn't know anything about healing was another fault but he had to try. He owed Snape that much. It had been terrifying to see the older man getting attacked by the snake, no matter how Harry may hate him.

"Oh, give it a rest, will you? I need to reach somebody in time and if I had my hands free I would have immobilized you." He managed to transfer some of the bottles as he waved his wand, his own holly wand, not the Elder Wand, that was safely hidden in his other pocket.

It might be foolish to walk here unaided, his arms full of potions and shrunken bandages when everybody assumed he had been up in the Gryffindor Tower getting some good sleep. But Harry had been unable to sleep; he had needed to see it. He needed to know if Snape was truly dead or if he could still save the man.

The big branch that was about to land on his head haltered and Harry darted forward to press the knot and the tree froze. Harry took a few steps towards the small hole in the trunk of the tree. It would lead to the Shrieking Shack.

He lowered himself into it, careful not to spill any of the potions. He had watched, to his horror, Snape being attacked by Lord Voldemort's snake, Nagini. The older wizard had clenched at his neck, giving Harry memories he needed to learn the truth at last.

Now, hours later, Harry was going back there to see what he could do to save Snape. He wasn't sure if the older wizard was even alive but he couldn't lose Snape now. He had lost everybody else and if it meant that one person he hated could live, then he would do what it took.

Remus Lupin and Nymphodora Tonks, Fred Weasley, Colin Creevey and many others had already died without Harry doing anything about that. He had to try, for his own sanity just as much as for the greater good.

He choked back a sob, it wasn't the time. There would be a time for happiness later when the people had been buried and Harry could think of this day with pride, though he wondered if he could ever think of his day with pride and without the feeling of hurt.

Perhaps in time he would learn to cope but it would be many days and perhaps months and it just hurt to think of it. Harry shook his head angrily, not caring for the way his head hurt or his glasses rattled a little.

He looked down at himself. His clothes were bloodied, his shirt torn but he hadn't had the peace of mind to change. He had been overcome by a sense of urgency when he had been in the Gryffindor dorm. A sense that he was forgetting something and then he had remembered Snape.

He had been so intent on the deadline Voldemort had given him and to finally end it to defeat the Dark Lord that he had not even thought of Snape. It had been bad of him, he knew but his mind had been overturned by all the events that were taking place and the sense that it was finally coming to a close.

Yet the worst of it was the fact that he had also died tonight. He had wanted to end it so badly. He had wanted Voldemort to stop hurting people and to end the prophecy that had haunted his steps since his fifth year, since he had learned it.

Harry rubbed at his eyes as he took quick steps towards the entrance of the Shrieking Shack. The smell of blood assaulted his nose and he nearly gagged. He stumbled again in his haste but he managed to keep upright.

His exhaustion was catching up with him and his body throbbed with pain that passed in waves through it. He shook his head when memories sought to flash before his eyes. He didn't want to think about them now; he didn't want to think about anything at all.

He spelled the crate away from the entrance and managed to pull himself up into the room he had been in hours before. He took care not to slide over the pool of blood but he froze at the sight that greeted him.

Severus Snape lay in a pool of his own blood, thrashing a little with tremors that ran through his system with the venom that had been injected their when the cursed snake had bitten him in the neck. His hand was feebly clutching at his neck to stop the staunch of blood.

The thin, tall, dark haired wizard with the harsh face and the long hooked nose emitted a low keening sound. Harry was at his side in an instant, not caring that the blood was soaking his jeans and knees. He dropped the potions and the bandages, keeping one in his hand and he pressed it against the twin wounds in the pale neck.

Snape looked like all blood had been sucked from his face so white was he. The moment Harry's hand touched his neck, the older wizard twitched away, trying in vain to pull himself away. The dark eyes flew open, unseeing and unfocussed and the thin lips open to reveal bloody teeth as Snape choked upon his own blood.

Harry immediately cursed his mind frantic. He did the only thing he could do and as he continued to press down upon the wounds he managed to lift Snape up with the other arm, supporting the older wizard against his chest.

"Cough! Come on, cough, Dammit!" Harry realized he was chanting into Snape's ear, trying to keep the Headmaster alive. Snape spluttered, gasping for breath and Harry glanced around the room to look for something to use.

The black eyes opened again and driven to desperate state of mind he was already in as he saw the fear in those black eyes, Harry raised his wand and cried out. "Fawkes!"

Nothing happened and Harry glanced down when a fist held his shirt front. Snape was still struggling for breath and Harry did the only thing he could think of to buy him time. He held his wand against Snape's bleeding throat and banished the blood within that made the older wizard choke.

Snape drew in a rattling breath and some colour came back to his face, it was just a little bit and Harry knew it was only time before blood would gather there again to choke Snape. The older wizard was limp in his arms, his body shaking and his face paling.

"Hold on, I will make sure that you will survive," he whispered, not sure if the wizard he was holding could hear him.

"Fawkes! The headmaster needs you, come now!" Harry cried out again, shouting in the hopes that the bloody bird would hear him. With a loud plop and two feathers that dwindled to the bloody ground a big red, yellow bird appeared.

The beady eyes took stock of Harry holding up a trembling Severus Snape. The bird gave a soft shriek and then hopped closer, onto Harry's knee. "Hurry, Fawkes, he doesn't have much time. I don't know how to heal the wounds…"

The Phoenix looked at him, cocking his head to the side and trilled softly and Harry could feel the lump in his throat disappearing as he choked out. "Fawkes, please. I know that you were Dumbledore's familiar but we did so much for him. He owns it to us and especially to Snape that you have to help him. Please heal him. I don't know how to do it…"

Fawkes peered at him, still trilling softly and Harry felt tears beginning to form in his eyes. He couldn't face it if Snape were to die now. Regardless the older wizard had to survive, some way or another.

Fawkes trilled a third time and then lowered his head, eyes still locked with Harry's green ones and just as out of the green ones tears fell so did out of the black ones.

Snape had gone deadly still in Harry's arms and for a moment Harry feared that they were too late and that Snape had given up, given into the darkness but then the older wizard moaned softly, his voice harsh in the bruised throat.

Harry tightened his grip as he whispered. "Just hold on. Just a few moments longer and then you will be free of the pain. I wish I had something to knock you out but I don't. I have got everything else with me."

He fell silent as he watched the wounds heal, the two puncture marks fading. Fawkes hopped around, nudging Snape's side where a flash of his black robe could still be seen through the red and bloodied robe.

Snape breathed a bit easier but he was still deadly pale. Fawkes nudged Snape's side again as Harry waved his wand to transform a piece of wood into a stretcher. He laid Snape down, careful not to injure the older wizard even more.

He picked up a vial of the blood replenishing potion as he uncorked it, pushed Fawkes away with his other hand just as the phoenix went to nudge Snape's side again. "Stop that," he ordered, supporting Snape's head as he lifted it before he said in a softer voice.

"You have to drink this, Professor. It will help you." The dark eyes were trained on his face but Harry wasn't sure if Snape was awake and knew who and where he was. He tipped the vial into Snape's mouth, carefully stroking his neck to make sure the wizard didn't choke upon the helpful liquid.

It brought some colour back to the sallow cheeks and Harry tipped another blood replenishing potion down the scarred and bruised throat. Snape's eyes were glassed over and Harry cursed at himself. He was at a loss of what to do.

The snake venom must surely still be in Snape's body but how to get it out? He feared that if he would levitate Snape to the castle now he might be in danger. Not only from the other students there who still thought he was a Death Eater and of course he had murdered Dumbledore but even a wounded man, especially this man, deserved treatment.

He was more afraid that Snape might not survive the journey unless Harry made sure he was stable first. "Fawkes, stop that!" He got annoyed at the bird which was nudging Snape's side again.

He tried to wave the bird away but when Fawkes picked at his hand and then nudged the older wizard's side again, Harry got angry. "Alright, I will check."

He went around to Snape's side, to the place Fawkes had kept nudging with his beak. He glanced up at the older wizard. Snape had lost consciousness or had at least closed his eyes. Harry's hand went into the pocket which had remarkably been spared from all the blood.

His fingers brushed a vial and he snatched it out, reading the spidery handwriting on it. _Antidote to Nagini's venom_

That had been the thing he needed. He uncorked the vial, beaming up at Snape who didn't see it of course. The already pale skin had a grey tint to it right now and a small band of sweat had erupted over the wrinkled forehead. The thin lips were pressed together in obvious pain and Harry's heart sank. He needed to move and quickly.

He picked up his wand and said, focussing upon a happy memory which was hard. _"Expecto Patronum." _

There was a blinding flash of light and then a huge stag was standing in front of him. The lightened beast waited until Harry spoke to him, choking out the words. "Go to the castle and tell them that I will soon be coming to the castle with Severus Snape. He is wounded and in need of aid. Tell them to come and help…I don't think I can move him all by myself."

Harry focussed his attention back to the man lying unconscious before him. He bent over Snape and said, "Please, sir, just hold on. It will just be a little while yet and then you will be out of the woods. Just hold on."

He received no a response and he carefully darted with bold fingertips over the bloodied lips. They opened in a soundless gasp and Harry, supporting Snape's head in the crook of his arm tipped the vial back. His fingers once more carefully stroked the neck, mindful of the bruising that the sheer force of the bite had left behind.

He hoped one vial would be enough. Somehow Snape had survived the crucial hours and Harry knew he might be too late. There could be damage done to the delicate nerves because of the venom and that it had taken him so long to get here.

He really should have sent somebody to get Snape. It would have been the honourable thing to do. The man wouldn't have deserved such a death and now that he was alive…well Harry wasn't sure how he felt about Snape but it was important for the older wizard to survive.

Regardless of Harry's hatred towards Snape, and he didn't know what his feelings towards the other wizard were now but he couldn't allow Snape to die, he just couldn't. He had seen the older wizard's memories and Harry had questions, many but he would be damned if he would ask them now.

He shook his head to force himself back to the present. All the vials he had taken were empty and Fawkes had settled against Snape's arm, beady eyes focussed upon Harry's face as the thin chest rose with each shallow breath Snape took.

"I don't know what else to do. We should get him back to the castle; I have done everything I can do." Harry realized he was speaking to somebody who couldn't answer him but he couldn't care less. His head was aching, as was the rest of his body and his eyes were heavy lidded with grief and exhaustion.

A flick of his wand had Snape following him and Fawkes was beginning to sing softly, a haunting tune and Harry felt his heart echo that tone. He was the first to exit the small entrance and then pressed the knot when the tree began to stir, it wouldn't be any use if he was beaten unconscious by a tree at the moment.

He turned to levitate Snape out, careful to keep the stretcher from jostling too much. Snape's face had relaxed a bit and a little more colour had returned to the sallow cheeks. The lines around the eyes and mouth had tightened in pain again and one balled up fist was trembling ever so faintly.

Harry reached out, loosening the tense fingers and he slipped his hand inside as Snape curled his hand around Harry's. They proceeded up the castle in this fashion, Harry levitating the stretcher with his wand while his left hand tightly clasped in Snape's hand, allowing the older wizard to draw whatever comfort he could from Harry's presence.

He didn't know how long they walked as the sun continued to shower them with rays of light. He nearly stumbled in his exhaustion but Fawkes trilled and Harry forced himself to keep upright.

Shouts went up when he approached the castle and he was sure that they had seen him. People were running at him and right before he stumbled and tripped, feeling his magic waver as he finally fell prey to exhaustion.

His hand slipped from Snape's slack grip but the stretcher was stable and Harry struggled up from his knees. A large hand was held out to him and he accepted it, allowed the tall red-haired wizard to help him to his feet and to steady him.

Ronald Weasley was standing beside him, his best friend and Ron softly said, his blue eyes concerned. "What were you thinking? I thought you made a joke, mate when Prongs said that you were trying to save Snape but I guess I was wrong…"

"Is he?" Harry choked out, his teeth clenched against the pain from the fall.

"Hermione got him. Don't worry about him. We will get him up to the Healing Wing and get you settled into bed," Ron's voice was calm as a feminine voice cut in.

"Perhaps we can take Harry up to the Healing Wing as well. He is suffering from shock I suppose." Hermione Granger's voice was soft and hoarse, thick with grief as the muggleborn witch easily kept Snape's stretcher steady and Harry gave a nod, allowing them to take care of him.

Hp

The Healing Wing was extremely busy, healers bustled back and forth, and many were portkeying to St Mungo's with patients who needed better care than they could provide here. Harry was sitting on a bed, allowing the mediwitch Madam Poppy Pomfrey's wand to perform a diagnostic charm on him.

He sat still, enjoying the gentle peace that hung here despite everybody bustling about. His eyes were fixed upon the curtained bed where various healers were trying to stabilize the wizard lying there.

"A good rest is what you need, boy. Don't you dare sneak out of here." Madam Pomfrey waved her finger at Harry and he allowed himself a brief smile at the humour in the situation.

She had known him too well. He had spent many times roaming the castle at night, trying to sneak out of the hospital wing when he had been there but he had never succeeded. "I won't, Madam Pomfrey, but can you perhaps tell me what will happen to Professor Snape?"

She hmphed and then said. "He will remain here, under the protection of Minerva McGonagall who is acting headmistress since our headmaster is lying in an unconscious state. I will put him in a deep sleep soon so that he may heal. He has gone through serious trauma and I am glad that you went back to help him."

"I had forgotten about him. I can hardly imagine what would have happened if I hadn't gone back."

"That is alright, dear. You couldn't have helped it. You have just defeated He Who Must Not Be Named and you are exhausted," Madam Pomfrey tried to console him but Harry shook his head.

"It isn't alright. I should have…." Tears were in his eyes again and Harry felt the mediwitch's arms reach around him, pulling him into a hug.

"You did the best you could do, Harry. Within time he will be punished for his crimes of murdering Albus."

Horror struck and Harry drew back and said. "No, Dumbledore's death was arranged between them. It wasn't Snape's fault and the Wizengamot has to know that. I have to tell them!"

"When you have rested."

"You can pledge your support for Severus, Harry, if you want…." The stern voice of his former head of house made Harry glance up. Professor McGonagall was a little shaken and there was a gash and bruising on her cheek but she still stood strong, a pillar for all those who needed it.

"Will that keep him out of Azkaban?" Harry relaxed back against the pillow, suddenly exhausted as he struggled to contain the tears inside. Madam Pomfrey was standing beside him and she had taken a vial out of her pocket, Dreamless Sleep Harry recognized it from his Potions class.

"For the moment, yes, until his trial starts. But that is of no matter now, Harry, rest now. You have need of it." Her voice was stern but her eyes were kind and Harry took the vial offered to him. To make the pain and the horror he had seen disappear to sleep for a night without dreams and only rest.

It was something that he needed. He needed to sleep and to replenish himself because the next few days would be hard and as Harry slipped off to sleep, he never anticipated how hard it would be.

**Wow, that is the first chapter. I do hope that you liked it. Review of course and send some ideas. **

**Next chapter: Severus Snape wakes up. How will he learn to cope with surviving Voldemort's downfall, something he thought he never would? Harry will try to deal with the funerals that must be attended. That and more in the next chapter: The next day. **


	2. The Next Day

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything o****f Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. I am glad people like this story. Ideas and suggestions are welcome. Let's begin. **

"Headmistress, you actually expect me to return to _that _school?" The normally velvet smooth voice which had sent all the students of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry into shaking fear and defence, knowing points would be docked or detentions would be served, was now a hoarse cry. Yet the black eyes still fixed without blinking upon the stooped, stern figure of the elderly witch by his bedside.

"I don't expect anything from you, Severus. You have been declared innocent by the Wizengamot. The evidence that proved you innocent was overwhelming. Albus had prepared everything and even Harry spoke up for you. It took them some time though but there was no reason for them to take you to Azkaban."

"I am apparently too wounded to go to Azkaban. Just because they declared me innocent doesn't mean that the Wizarding Community has believed them." Severus Snape struggled to sit upright in the bed he was occupying in the private room at St. Mungo's.

"There are people who don't believe in your innocence but the overwhelming evidence of your memories, Albus' memories and Harry's statement and of course the evidence that Harry managed to gather. He was quite passionate about your case."

"Potter is never passionate about anything that resolves around me." He spat, shifting to accommodate for a wave of pain.

"Severus, that is not true. Harry saved you. He was the one who brought you back. I personally think that he threw himself on the case to try and stay sane. He seemed a bit off last time we met." Severus' eyes flew upwards to her face and the older wizard frowned as he said.

"Potter was never sane. And I will expect him to run through the door any moment, telling me I owe a Wizarding Debt to him."

"Harry is not his father, Severus; he will do no such thing. He has his faults, I will admit that but he has been through a lot. The recent changes have affected him greatly, even if he doesn't show it. He is living at Grimmauld Place…."

"Alone?"

"No, Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger are living there as well. I think that Ronald will move at the end of the week, or so I hear from Molly." Minerva sat down in the chair she had summoned for herself, ignoring the look that Severus send her.

"And you think that it will be healthy for a seventeen year old to live there all alone, regardless of the things that Potter has done."

"And where else should I place him? I refuse to send him back to his relatives, even if that was possible. The school will not begin until the first of October. There is no place for him and he is old and wise enough to make up his own mind. Last year he was on his own as well. But I am not here to discuss Harry's habits. I came to offer you a job, if you are willing."

"And what position would you offer me then? That of the resident bat of the dungeon, I believe that position has already been filled by a whale." Severus coughed, taking a sip of his water which he levitated to him with his wand.

"Severus, be nice about your colleagues." She scowled. She took a deep breath and Severus then realized how old and weary she looked, he wondered what had happened to make her look like that.

But the recent battle and the losses suffered, of course the destruction done and the happy celebration that the Dark Lord had finally been defeated was still partaking, though not for all. Severus had read the papers, families like the Weasleys and Harry Potter had disappeared completely, only coming out for the occasional funeral.

People had wanted Potter to attend of course but Severus had seen in the picture, just how lost Potter had looked after the Final Battle. The Ministry was still in shambles and while court sessions had been held for the Death Eaters that have been caught, some were plain ceremony before they had been casted off to Azkaban, but some, like his own trial, the evidence had been so overwhelming that there hadn't been any other choice than to let him go.

The other trial, the Malfoy trial was still in progress. He had read about it in the papers as the Daily Prophet gladly picked their past and their future apart, to the amusement of the readers. Harry Potter had yet to appear in the paper and Severus had been waiting with great anticipation until the brat would surely come to his bedside to demand answers from Snape about his mother.

He glanced up when Minerva said. "I was going to offer you the DADA position but I think that a combined effort would be good. I think that in light of recent events and changes, if and when the students return that we will be offering a different curriculum for the students who return for the seventh year. There are some who don't really need the charms we offer them in seventh year because they are more advanced than the other students in their year, the same with the Defence magic…."

"You are speaking of people like Potter?" It wasn't really a question and she nodded, pleased.

"Yes, I am. Many of the former students had a lot of practise last year. Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad to offer some sort of counselling as well as private lessons. I am still working on it, but I think I am getting there. There is just so much that we have to take into account." She sighed.

"Including the Ministry's influence, the Death Eaters that have escaped and of course the danger to the other students when Potter once more attends school." Severus raised an eyebrow at her expression.

He had woken up 5 days ago, in pain and disoriented but healing quickly. He would have healed more quickly if somebody had found him sooner. But he had heard the story, of how Potter had found him, had tried to heal him and then bring him back to the school.

"I am not going to turn Harry away simply because of danger. We will need to ward the school anew anyway and I am thinking of asking Harry to help. He is quite a strong wizard."

Severus raised an eyebrow; there was something that she wasn't telling him. He waited for it and then said. "Do I need to guess, Minerva?"

She raised an eyebrow at him and for a moment he felt like a small first year again. He scowled at himself. "You have yet to give me your answer, young man. You may of course return to Spinner's End but as you said yourself, the Wizarding World has not forgiven you. Though I can understand why you would want to remain here. Just think about it, will you, lad? I have to leave. I am running late for Remus Lupin's funeral."

"Lupin is dead?" Severus glanced up at Minerva but she only gave him a snort and a curt nod. He couldn't pretend he was sorry for it, he never liked Lupin but he hadn't known that Lupin had died. He had only read of the Death Eaters that had died or had been captured, not wishing to go over the list of students killed just yet.

He remembered very little of the Final Battle, except a sense of urgency. He had been at the back of Voldemort's ranks, not wishing to be seen by anybody else. But then Lucius had said that Voldemort needed him in the Shrieking Shack and Severus knew, he had known it all along, he was going to die.

Naturally, it had been a huge shock to discover that he had survived when he woke up in the ward a few days ago. He had woken up in the middle of the night, disoriented as to where he was. Pain reminded him that he was alive in fact and a moment later a healer had bustled through the door, bleary eyed and hair tousled to give him a strong sedative.

Now, five days later he had managed to get his mind wrapped around the news that he had survived and that his former lord had been defeated. He hadn't even thought about his life after the war, he had never thought about it because he never assumed that he would survive this war.

He sighed, freedom would be nice but he would never be welcome anywhere in Britain. He had murdered a beloved headmaster and while Severus would always continue to feel guilt over it, he couldn't understand how he had managed to walk away.

But since a plea from the Chosen One seemed to carry extra weight these days it was no surprise. The Wizengamot was probably still reeling from the shock of the brat speaking. Severus snorted and he glanced up, there was something that the Headmistress wasn't telling him.

"Are you sure that Slughorn is up to teaching NEWT potions?" He carefully brooched the subject, running a hand over the blankets.

"Severus, he was used to teaching before you ever thought of becoming a Potions Master, so yes, I am quite right in my assumptions that he can teach any NEWT students. I am sure that there are still some students who are unable to think of Potions without quivering in fear because of what you did to them…But I digress, however unorthodox your methods were, they were adequate, though I hope that you will understand that there is no need for you to play a role now, so you may actually be kind to _some _of the students." Minerva McGonagall rolled her eyes.

"How about Head of House duty? Since Slughorn was so kind to take over the Slytherins Head of House duty when I was Headmaster, however brief the period might have been."

"You will resume Head of House duty to Slytherin but you will be monitored, Severus, may that much be clear. The board of governors demanded that much from me at least. There will be some other rules as well…."

"What other rules?" Severus was suspicious.

If the board of governors decided to interfere at Hogwarts then it could mean great changes, some for better and some for worse, and truthfully Severus had never really liked changes. They always resulted in the worst for him.

"There will be additional safety rules. Extra wards, counselling sessions and private tutoring." She sighed, for a moment looking old.

"I really do have to leave now. Severus, you will have your answer ready for me next time I visit." She gave his hand a quick squeeze and walked towards the door.

Severus sighed, he had his answer now. It was true what she had said and while he couldn't think of how to get his life back into order, why not spend another year at Hogwarts, where he was needed and could think of what to do with his life. He fingered his wand and it sent sparks onto the blankets, harmless but Severus glanced up and said.

"Minerva?"

"Yes, Severus?" The Headmistress turned back to him.

"Raise the pay and I will consider…."

She managed to hide a smile but barely, the old cat and nodded, saying. "I will expect you to see you at the staff gathering on the first of August. Until then, Severus."

She then closed the door behind her, leaving a gaping Potions Master in her wake. Inside the room Severus shook his head and snorted. It would be another year with Potter, Weasley, Weasley and Granger and countless other mentally harmed students but it would be normal and that was all he craved and she had known it, insufferable woman but truly if he couldn't install the fear in the students anymore, what else was there for him to do and he so loved taking house points.

In his mind, Severus had already begun working out the curriculum for the year as he waited with anxious breath for Potter to appear and glad when his now once against student didn't.

Hp

Harry Potter checked his reflection in the bathroom mirror one last time. He cleaned his glasses and then glanced once more at the mirror. The purple circles under his eyes had disappeared a little and he didn't look so pale anymore, a few days of nearly constant sleeping could do that to a person.

He straightened his shirt before he pulled the jumper over his head. He whispered a cooling charm, knowing that in the hot June sun it would get very hot at the graveside. He had to do this too many times in the last week, it had begun with Fred, he made himself attend, to be there for Ron and for the rest as the family as well, they deserved that much, even if it had been his fault that Fred had died.

He didn't remember much of the ceremony, except Ginny clinging to him and Harry, doing more what was right than actually feeling it, held her tightly. He remembered Percy's eyes upon him, angry with grief and he knew the brightest Weasley had held him responsible for Fred's death.

He had attended Tonks' funeral as well but he couldn't remember much of that either except Teddy Lupin's desperate cries and Andromeda Tonks shaking her head that he didn't need to hold his godchild. Didn't she understand that he had wanted to? He needed to confirm for himself that Teddy was still there and wasn't going to leave him like his parents had.

When he had returned to the wretched London House, he had dismissed Kreacher and gone to bed, feeling extremely tired. He had slept for most of the next three days, ignoring Hermione who had pounded on his door and ignoring Ron when the older wizard sat by his bedside.

For a while Harry had dozed with Ron sleeping on a transfigured bed next to him, glad that he didn't need to talk about anything or what he was feeling. He wasn't sure what he was feeling, relief that it was all over and somehow disappointed that it all went back to normal so quickly.

For him, he had lived all his life to the point of having to defeat Voldemort and now that it was gone, well Harry wasn't sure what to do next. He had always wanted to become an auror but because he never went to his final year at Hogwarts, he had never sat his NEWTs so it might just be hard to get into auror training, even with his credentials.

He sighed and then glanced at the door when a female voice came. "Harry, we have to go. Are you nearly done in there?"

Hermione Granger, his long time friend had decided to move in with him. She had modified her parents' memories and had managed to make them think that their life's dream had been to go to Australia until this mess was sorted had managed that she was without a home. Though she and Ron were close, or getting closer at least, though Harry sometimes wondered at the slow pace they were taking, they weren't ready to move in together at the Weasleys.

"Yeah, I am coming." He shouted back. Hermione had mentioned at dinner last night that she wanted to try to see if she could return her parents' memories to them so they would remember they had a daughter. Ron had eaten with them and had asked if it was possible, Hermione had given him a wry smile and said it would be worth a shot.

He opened the door to see Hermione smiling at him. She was trying to be strong but obviously failing miserably. He smiled at her, knowing that in the days past, as he had slept, she had buried herself in her books.

"Shall we apparate?" He asked, reaching her side. She looked dreadful, pale and her eyes were red with the crying she had been doing.

It was going to be a hard day, they would say goodbye to Remus Lupin today, an old friend of his father and of course a friend of him. Remus would be buried at Hogwarts, as for most of the other people who had died at the Final Battle.

"Yeah, perhaps side along Apperating. We should move to the front step." Sirius Black's old home had seen worst days. Since his fifth year the house had served as an order house for the Order of the Phoenix, they had spent the better part of the summer making the house liveable again.

He had lived here for a couple of weeks during the last year, right before the Death Eaters had stormed in and they had to flee. The house had seen curses and hexes but Harry and Hermione had put the house through a big sweep before they had moved in. Apart from some unpleasant paintings in the hallway, there were no other remainders of last year; they had even managed to get rid of the stuffy Albus on the carpet.

There were strong wards around the house, including anti apparition wards and the floo had been blocked and warded as well, intertwined with the wards the order had left behind, luckily they had been tied to the house and not to a person because else they would have been gone by now.

Harry took Hermione's arm, his friend still thought that he was depleted because of the final battle but Harry was merely weary. He gave her a tight lipped smile and then nodded, telling her and himself that he was ready.

They apparated to a hill overlooking the damaged school of Hogwarts. Harry felt a pang in his heart; it reminded him of home and weeks ago that the battle had been fought. There were already enough graves and Harry felt his stomach churn at the sight of the graves with the names on them, the names of people he knew.

He shook his head, feeling Hermione's hand on his own as she squeezed. "Look there is Ron." Hermione waved at her boyfriend and Harry forced himself to focus upon Ron, the tall wizard who was quickly approaching them.

Ronald Weasley was the youngest son of the Weasley family and Harry's best friends since they met on the train to Hogwarts. Since that time, Ron had always stood by him, never wavering from his support, although perhaps once or twice but Harry didn't feel like mentioning that.

Harry was glad that Ron was here. This funeral was the one that tore at his heart. All of the friends his father had once known and gone to school with were gone, all except Snape. Snape, wounded in the hospital with a snake bite. The wizard he had saved because he had thought that Snape had died in the Shrieking Shack.

Harry was unsure of what to think. The moment he had heard that Snape was still on trial, he had said that he had wanted to help, much to the surprise of himself, Ron and Hermione. Ron especially had been very vocal but it just seemed that it had been something that Harry had to do.

He knew that Snape had known his mum but with the pressure of the trial he hadn't wanted to go and talk to his former professor. He was too tired and his mind too raw to deal with anything the git was likely to throw at him. He needed time to think and to make his peace, not that that was likely going to happen.

Harry groaned, just very softly when Ginny came by, she merely gave him a sad smile and a wave and didn't approach him. Harry frowned at that. He wasn't even sure how he felt about Ginny now. He still loved her, of course he did, it was expected, wasn't it?

"Mr Potter, could I have a word with you perhaps after the funeral?" Harry turned at the soft but stern voice. Professor McGonagall, Headmistress of Hogwarts was standing beside him, dressed in robes of midnight blue. The colour reminded him of Albus Dumbledore but had he worn the robes, they would have been embroidered with something amusing or something fun.

Thinking of the late Headmaster brought on a fresh wave of grief and one of anger. Harry bit his lip to keep himself from sighing angrily and he nodded, making his face blank. He knew his eyes most likely still reflected his mood and thoughts but to hide such a thing, well it would be impossible.

Already his head was beginning to pound and the funeral hadn't even started. Hell, he hadn't even moved from his spot yet, though Hermione had her arms wrapped around Ron and her face buried in his shoulder while the redhead stared at Harry, frowning at the Headmistress.

She wouldn't want him to talk to the papers now, would she? At that horrid thought Harry felt himself pale. He forced himself to meet her concerned eyes and said. "Of course."

"Good. There are things I would like to ask you and to discuss." Harry gave her a nod and for a moment his former Head of House's hand was laid on his shoulder and she gave it a squeeze. Harry suddenly found his strength and he took a deep breath, forcing his shoulders back and his head held high as he walked forward.

The grave stood next to all the others, at the end of a long row. In the past few weeks many students and order members had been buried here. Remus Lupin would be buried next to his wife Nymphadora Tonks. There weren't many people gathered around the grave for many people hadn't liked Remus or those who had known Remus were dead.

Kinsley Shacklebolt, the new Minister for Magic was there and he gave Harry a nod, which Harry returned. The scarlet robed aurors stood off at the side, keeping a weathered eye upon their minister and some nudged each other when they saw Harry.

Harry pretended he didn't see it; he didn't want to see and certainly didn't want to deal with it. He closed his eyes firmly and shook his head before forcing his thoughts and his eyes back to the grave in front of him.

Luckily Remus' body was already covered because Harry knew that he wouldn't have been able to deal with seeing his beloved friend, and one he had considered a family member lying there, looking like he was sleeping.

Mrs Weasley sniffled as she leaned heavily against Mr Weasley, who looked years older since Harry last saw him. His hand was resting on his daughter's shoulder but Ginny's brown eyes were locked on the shroud covered body.

Hermione was crying silently at Ron's side and his best friend glanced at him, asking. "All right, mate?"

"Yeah, have to be right?" Harry sighed and then focussed his attention as Teddy Lupin gave a cry next to him. The woman with the long black hair next to him looked years older than last he had seen her. The difference between her and her sister Bellatrix Lestrange could be seen easily now and Andromeda bounced Teddy, trying to get him to be quiet.

His eyes were burning and Harry longed to shut his ears for all the cries around him, least of all young Teddy's cries. Teddy's face was red and Harry ran his finger lightly over the distressed child's cheek. Teddy quieted and the golden eyes fixed upon Harry.

Andromeda's eyes followed her grandson's movements and then she smiled and nodded, allowing Harry to take his godchild. Harry listened to the words that were spoken by everybody, about what a good friend Remus had been, what a loyal order member and a strong wizard.

He took a deep breath when it was his turn and he said, his face fixed upon the body underneath the shroud as he bounced Teddy on his hip, which was gurgling softly and drooling on Harry's robe. "Remus Lupin was a good friend, a loving one and he always had good advice. His only fault was that he sometimes was too afraid of what others thought of him. He stood up for what he believed in and he was capable of forgiving people for many faults. He wasn't somebody prone to violence and he hated that he was a werewolf. I am glad that he was my friend and my guardian for years and I wish that I had gotten to know him sooner…."

Harry couldn't speak anymore. He couldn't say what he had wanted to say, that he had wanted Remus to come and get him when he was four years old instead of when he was 13. That he had been disappointed when Remus didn't write to him. That it had been a blow to his heart when Remus had offered to help him simply because Harry could use a pair of hands instead of somebody to look up to.

Was that the way things would always go? That there wasn't an adult he could count on. That once he did something that he didn't want to do, he was thought of not to be like his father. Perhaps he didn't wish to be like his father but nobody ever thought of that.

Harry shielded Teddy's eyes and himself away from the flames that suddenly rose into the marble that covered Remus' body. "Say goodbye to your father, Ted." He whispered into the raven hair of the baby crawled against his chest.

People were still crying as they left the grave, some staying behind to lay flowers and others going someplace else to visit one of the other graves. "I will take Teddy back from you, Harry."

Andromeda even sounded old and Harry gave her Teddy back, the baby giving a soft cry when he was awoken by the movement. He glanced at the witch and then said. "I am glad to watch Teddy. I want to spent time with him."

"I will see, Harry. Right now I still have to work out everything. I will send you an owl soon." She dismissed him and Harry felt like shouting to her but he felt Professor McGonagall's hand on his shoulder and reluctantly he turned to the other witch.

He nodded and then followed her, waving away Ron's and Hermione's concern. She turned to him when they reached the line of trees and she asked, quite bluntly. "Have you considered what you will be doing after the summer, Potter?"

"Huh, what?" Harry was caught off guard. His mind had still been with Remus' body which was now buried in the ground.

She gave him a tight lipped smile and then said. "I shall take that as a no. Would you consider returning to Hogwarts to finish your seventh year, Mr Potter?"

Harry was amazed, returning to school, he had never thought about that. With everything that had been going on, he hadn't given his future any thought, not to mention that it hurt a little to think of his future without all these people.

"If I was given the chance, then yeah." Harry gave her a nod. It wouldn't hurt to go back to school to learn some more, just until he learned what he really wanted to do with his life and it would put his mind at ease a little, returning to the normality of classes.

"Good, then consider this your chance. The letters will be sent out soon once I get everything sorted and I will send somebody to discuss everything with you. There are some changes in the curriculum this year. Now, there will be no special treatment for you, Mr Potter."

Harry glared at her. "I don't want any!" He said flatly.

"Good, now on another note I would like you to add your wards to the castle."

"But why?" Harry realized he was staring and he closed his mouth, averting his gaze as he said. "Haven't I done enough damage already?"

"Mr Potter, you are not responsible for everything that has happened. You are a strong wizard and you can be assured that this will aid in protecting the students. I will owl you an appropriate date. Go and join your friends, Mr Potter, we will discuss everything on a later date. I can imagine this day was very hard on you."

Professor McGonagall looked old and weary and Harry watched her walk away. For some reason, the thought of returning to Hogwarts made him smile for the first time in days and as he returned to Ron and Hermione, to share the news with them, he knew that the future just looked a little bit brighter.

**I hope you liked it. Review of course. **

**Next chapter: Severus Snape gets the shock of his life when Potter does turn up by his bedside one day, but what will the Potions Master say when he learns that it is on the orders of Minerva McGonagall? What will Harry ask of him and how will they deal with their past hatred and the recent changes in the Wizarding World? That and more in the next chapter: St Mungo's. **


	3. St Mungo's

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. I know that some people have wondered about Professor McGonagall's reaction so I just wanted to say, she is not a very motherly woman. She doesn't coddle anybody but she is strict and at the moment I thought exactly what Harry needed. If there are any ideas or suggestions, feel free to add them. The romance part will eventually have to wait a while longer because I have a lot of get through. Let's begin. **

"Harry, are you sure that this is a good idea?" Hermione sounded worried and Harry bit back an angry sigh. He didn't want Hermione's worry. He could understand it, of course he could, but it didn't mean that he wanted to or should.

The brown eyes looked old and weary, quite like he felt but he merely schooled his expression. This was not the time to get into this discussion again about his feelings. He knew Hermione was having a hard time trying to figure out what to do next; they all did, even when he discussed it with Ron on the very few occasions that they spoke.

The letter that Professor McGonagall had said would come had arrived yesterday. He had been invited to go to Platform 9 and ¾ on November the first. Harry had wondered for a while at the strange date when he began to realize that perhaps it had been done for the younger students to continue with their other years in the correct timelines.

He once more eyed the letter. He was supposed to visit his tutor today, Professor McGonagall had mentioned that too, he would be having lessons with a private tutor, everybody would.

He wondered what lessons it would be. He would be tested in all his subjects today at St Mungo's. Harry wondered why he had to go there, nobody he knew was there but perhaps everybody's exams were taking place someplace else.

He frowned, wondering who would become his teacher. Would it be Professor McGonagall herself or Professor Flitwick, Slughorn perhaps or somebody else? He also wondered who would be the Defense against the Dark Arts teacher this year. He had loads of practice but not really a desire to teach.

Harry glanced around the beautiful shining kitchen. Kreacher was delighted that they were back at Grimauld Place and that two people were living here. Once more Harry wondered just how the old house elf could have gone so mad, even now he was still muttering sometimes to the portrait of Mrs. Black in the hallway.

Harry signed and checked his letter again. It didn't say he had to take a book, only his wand. He fingered his wand, it wasn't far from his hands these days, and he always carried it around. Perhaps it would be good to get a sheath for it to keep it hidden and near him at all times.

That would be the next step then, right after his appointment. He focused on Hermione and said. "Yes, why not? I thought you were excited to go back to school."

The thin witch gave him a smile, one of her old ones, full of joy and without the scars and grief they had seen in the past months. Of course Hermione was excited, what was he asking? He should have known.

"I am, Harry, it is just…" Hermione worried her lower lip between her teeth. Harry pulled back the chair to the kitchen table and sat down. His green eyes rose to meet her brown ones and Hermione continued.

"What if it is dangerous? Not all the Death Eaters are caught yet and…."

"Hermione, I am not going to sit here and wait until all the Death Eaters are caught before I return to school. I can't hide myself in this house. I always knew I could be a target when I killed Voldemort…"

"But Harry, what about the other students? Haven't you thought about them? Many may not like you anymore."

"Hermione, I don't care! Why should I care about the other students when they never cared about me? I am sure that they were glad to be rid of me when they did but I am not going to put my education on hold simply because they may not want me at school. Besides, I am sure it is not that bad."

In truth Harry wasn't so sure but he would go crazy if he thought about these things. It was hard enough not to think and remember what had happened nearly two months ago. How could he ever forget it when every time he opened the Daily Prophet there were new details about trials, speculations about people that had played an important role in the war and such things.

Hermione sighed and then brightened as she said. "I found an article in a book explaining how to get my parents memory back. I might try it when I do more research. Do you suppose it will work if I try it?"

Harry's heart fell. Hermione was really hoping that her parents would forgive her once she put their memory back. He knew that she missed them terribly but to him it was strange. Why had she done it in the first place then? Would Voldemort really have gone after them?

Harry sighed and mused, yeah, he probably would have. He would have murdered them because they were muggles and they might bring Harry out of hiding. Though it had always struck him as strange why Voldemort had never gone after the Weasleys but he guessed that Voldemort had been so occupied with the Elder Wand that he hadn't really killed anybody much anymore or had decided to try and kill Harry.

Harry sighed; he was finding it difficult to go back to normal life without looking over his shoulder or jumping at shadows. He knew the paper was speculating what he was doing and what he was planning and they were wondering when he was going to make an appearance in public but he never wanted to so that people could show him their grief, he had enough of a hard time dealing with his own.

"It might work, Hermione. I don't know, I never modified anybody's memory before, not on the level that you did."

Hermione's pale face seemed to pale even more and she stammered out. "Do you think I made the wrong decision? What if I can't return their memory? But surely it must work…."

Harry leaned forward, his hand around hers as he softly said, hoping to calm her. He had never been particularly good with females who were upset that was why he was so glad Ginny was never crying or otherwise hysterical. "Hermione, you can always ask for help. I am sure Professor McGonagall can help you if Ron or I can't."

The floo flared and Harry glanced up to see Ron spinning into view. The slightly older wizard's eyes narrowed when he saw how Harry and Hermione were sitting. Harry gave his best friend a slight smile, surely Ron understood that it was just friendship and not love that made Harry hold Hermione's hand. The blue eyes darkened and Harry softly said, "She was thinking of her parents again."

Harry released Hermione's hands as she continued to take deep breaths. He knew she was hurting but he leaned back in his seat. He could see the same envelope in Ron's hand and then Ron walked closer. He rested a hand on Hermione's shoulder and Harry asked, "So you got the same letter that we did?"

Ron finally grinned and nodded. "Yeah, meeting my private tutor next week. I wonder who it is. Mum was so excited. She was actually quite cross with me when she found out that we never intended to go back to school. She wanted to blame it on you, Harry but since you have been through so much…though she is wondering when you're coming round again."

Harry sighed, truth be told, he didn't want to go to the Weasleys because he didn't want to be reminded of Fred's death. He could sometimes see the desire to run in Ron's eyes when he came round, when it all was too much to be in his house that reminded him of his older brother.

Harry couldn't begin to understand what it was like to lose a brother. Somebody who had always been there and he had been too young to remember any grief about his parents. He more missed the idea of having somebody to lean on and to know that there was somebody who loved him unconditionally, no matter what he did and who was proud of him.

Some people would say that as the perfect idea of a partner but Harry sometimes wondered. He knew his parents had married right out of Hogwarts or a few years anyway. He was at the same state in his life, well not mentally, he didn't want to marry Ginny right now. He hoped she wanted the same thing.

Part of him feared it would go wrong like the same way with his parents. What if twenty years down the line when he and Ginny had children, she wouldn't be the right person for him? Would it really be so bad to simply think of these things now and then just take their time? They had ages now, years even if things went right between them.

"Harry?"

Harry glanced up as Hermione said. "Shouldn't you be getting ready to go to St. Mungo's?"

Harry glanced at his clock, groaning softly when he saw the time. It wouldn't do him any good if he was late on his first official day back to school. Professor McGonagall would excuse him and forgive him, he knew, especially if he told her about Hermione but he didn't want her to pity him because he was helping a friend.

"Yeah, I will be going." He stood up, dusting off his jeans before he checked, out of habit if his wand was in his pocket and then he walked to the door, waving goodbye at his two friends.

"Good luck, Harry." Hermione called.

"Yeah, mate, hope it isn't Snape, the old git."

And while Harry tried to smile and laugh at the joke, he hoped that it was because he and Snape, despite him staying out of Azkaban, had a score to settle.

Hp

Severus eyed the wand that lay on the blankets. He was fully dressed in his old teachers garb though it smelled strange. It didn't smell familiar, like his dungeons and the potions he brewed. He could barely remember the last time he had brewed anything. But in a matter of time he would be back at Hogwarts, with all the hostile stares and such things from his colleagues as they remembered the last year too well for his opinion but he had already said yes.

Severus glanced at the clock; the student he was supposed to test today was running late. He sneered, he wondered who it was. Minerva hadn't told him anything but she had been very secretive about this student, as long as it wasn't Potter then it was fine.

Though Severus wondered what he would do if it was Potter, well deal with it and try not to anger the boy too much. He had heard tales of the power Potter had displayed in the Final Battle and he didn't really want to see it, though it would be interesting, think of all the things Potter could be taught.

No, Minerva valued him too much to do such a thing to them and Potter was too sacred for her to even consider. No, Minerva wouldn't do such a thing, right?

He was more worried about his own magic; he knew the wards had been lifted around his room to allow the lesson to take place. Severus had a list of all the things he had to test this student upon, well he would make sure that if this was going to be the student he was going to be tutoring then he would make it count and make sure the student never forgot the lesson, whoever the student might be.

Hp

Harry Apparated to the front desk of St. Mungo's. The room was filled with people who were sporting bandages, boils, were talking strangely or making weird noises. The line before him to the front desk wasn't that long and it moved fast.

Harry had no idea where he had to be. He clenched his letter tighter and forced himself to be calm. The queue was moving slow and he really was already a little late. He really hoped he wouldn't lose points before the year even started, imagine his year mates surprise and anger then.

Harry sighed, it wouldn't be the first thing they would be angry with him about. They had lost fifty students, all because he didn't want to go to Voldemort and because he had things to do. He firmly shook his head, this wasn't the time to think these things, nor did he want to think on Hermione's worry that he slept a lot; he simply didn't want to think at all.

"Welcome to St. Mungo's, how may I help you?" The bored voice of the witch behind the counter greeted Harry as he finally made it to the front of the queue. The blond pretty young woman was busy scratching on a parchment and Harry cleared his throat as he asked and held out the letter.

"I am here on the request of Professor McGonagall, Headmistress of Hogwarts. She told me that I was supposed to meet my tutor here…."

"Do you have a name by any chance?"

"Uhm….I don't know who I am meeting but I am Harry Potter."

The witch's face lifted and she plastered a big toothy smile on her face as she said, brushing her hair back with a long fingered hand with perfectly manicured nails. She smiled sweetly at him and then held out her hand and asked. "Are you returning to Hogwarts then, Mr. Potter?"

"I don't know yet." Harry shuddered; he wasn't used to this kind of attention from women. He was only getting used to people staring at him and such things, whispering about him. After 6 years at Hogwarts how could he be otherwise?

"Well, if you need anything else from me, just say the word. The person who is waiting for you is up in the private ward on the third floor." The witch's bright eyes shifted over Harry's body and he fought the urge to step back.

He stammered out a quick word of thanks before he seized the letter and left the queue, trying not to bump into anybody. This sort of attention unnerved him greatly. He didn't want this. That woman desired him and it unnerved him greatly, in ways Harry couldn't explain.

He fled up the stairs, not wanting to take the elevator and be reduced to more stairs. News would travel fast that Harry Potter was visiting somebody at St. Mungo's, even when he didn't know who he was visiting. Perhaps he should apply a spell to hide his features?

That really wasn't such a bad idea and Harry took out his wand. His desire to remain anonymous was overpowering and he softly muttered the spell to hide his scar, now a thin white line and he charmed his eyes to be a few shades darker. Let's see if somebody recognized him now. He took a deep breath and then walked upstairs.

Hp

Severus checked the clock again and fought the desire to growl. The student was late and if it was anything he hated, it was students who were tardy. What if he had better things to do?

Trust in the youth of these days, even with the war to think of nobody else but themselves. He picked up his wand and vented his frustration a little by blasting sparks. He practiced the movements of even the more complicated spell, without saying the words.

His movements were restricted because of his bandages and he was yet to be out of bed to find out the states of his nerves. He sneered for good measure and glanced at the clock again. Such a pity he couldn't take off points when the student arrived.

Severus picked up the parchment Minerva had given him. He was to test the student in defensive spells, charms and transfigurations. He really did wonder who it was.

Hp

Harry checked the number on the door. Yes, this was the right place. Not for the first time did he wonder who was waiting for him. There was no name on the door, except for the healer in charge. He sighed and steeled himself, he had to do this.

He glanced down at his watch, he was late. He sighed again and rubbed at his hidden scar before he raised his hand and knocked.

Hp

Severus allowed a gleeful smirk to burst forward when the knock finally came. He allowed it to slide to his most fearful and legendary frown as he called out a deep enter.

He wondered who would come through the door.

Hp

Harry took a deep breath as he opened the door and stepped inside. His heart nearly hammered to a stop when he saw the dark scowling figure sitting upright in the bed. The dark hair looked clean and it was brushed back. The pale face was impressive but Harry couldn't do anything but bite out, forgetting he had altered his appearance. "You!"

He glanced around the room, narrowing his eyes at Severus Snape. This must be a cruel joke. Surely Snape couldn't become his tutor for the rest of the year. The Headmistress couldn't do that to him, she knew how much he loathed the man, regardless of whatever Snape had done in the Final Battle, he had still killed Dumbledore…

Snape frowned and the dark eyes narrowed in thought as they fixed upon Harry's dark green eyes. They probed his face and he then spat. "Potter!"

"What are you doing here, Death Eater?" Harry advanced towards the bed, throwing the door shut behind him as he grasped his wand tightly in his hand, not even remembering that he had taken it out of his pocket.

"In case you were wondering, Potter, this is my room you are currently standing in." Snape answered, his dark eyes rising up from Harry's wand back to his face.

Harry felt rage well up within him. This had been what he had been waiting for all year, to avenge himself and Dumbledore. It didn't matter in the moment that the old Headmaster had lied to him and kept things from him, no Snape was here now and Harry could do whatever he wanted…

The door burst open and a healer came bursting in. She reminded Harry of Madam Pomfrey, the mediwitch at Hogwarts. He was so startled that he lowered his wand and by the look on Snape's face, though the older wizard quickly schooled his features, he was startled as well.

"Ah, so nice to see that you have a visitor, Professor. He doesn't get that many visitors and it is such a shame because I think that anybody deserves visitors. My name is healer Mugworth by the way, my dear. Are you an old student of the Professor by any chance?" She smiled kindly at Harry, putting him on guard.

Harry was so startled by the sudden appearance that he fumbled around for an answer before Snape sighed and said, "I trust Professor McGonagall told you about the test that will be administered today? That is why the student has come to visit…"

"Then why was his wand raised? I know that the wards have been lifted at Professor McGonagall's request but you are my patient, Professor Snape and you are not to overextend yourself….But I will leave you then…could I perhaps bring you some tea for you and Mr.….?" The healer's tone of voice showed exactly what she was thinking of Professor McGonagall's request.

"Mr. Peterson will not be staying long enough for us to idly sit by and sip tea. I will summon you if there is something wrong." Snape's voice was curt and the healer bristled at him but she did as he requested and left.

Harry wasn't sure why Snape hadn't revealed his name. It wasn't like the older wizard at all. Normally Snape would go out of his way to make Harry miserable. Not that he really had much to do these days but Harry refused to think of these things as he shook his head.

The moment the door banged shut he resurfaced and glanced around. Snape was glaring at him, his dark eyes narrowed as he said softly. "Take off the glamour."

"No!"

"Potter, take off the glamour or I will do it for you! At this moment, in this room, during this test, I am your teacher and you will address me with the respect I am due!" Snape snarled.

"Then I should just call you a bastard, git or a Death Eater if you are adamant that we stand on ceremony!"

Snape's face lost what little color it had left and Harry realized he was taking it too far. Yet he would be damned if he was going to apologize to this man. _You weren't ready to hate him so much when you saved him after the Final Battle._

"Shut it!" Harry hissed at himself.

"Excuse me, Potter?" Harry refocused his attention as he snarled at the little voice in the back of his mind to keep quiet. He wouldn't listen to it. He had every reason to be angry and to hate Snape…_He went out of his way to save you, plenty of times and to keep you alive even at the risk of losing his own life_

_He murdered Dumbledore_

_Dumbledore was never truthful so why should I care…_

_Shut up! I can't deal with it if this changes as well. Too much has changed already and if it means that I can hate Snape without peace for a few more months then so be it. I will only see him at school…He won't be my tutor; he is just going to ask me to do some defense stuff…._

"If you do not show me the respect I request, Potter, I will send you on your way with a letter telling the Headmistress that you are unfit to attend the new school year without learning some self restraint. I do hope that you realize that the Headmistress is doing you a huge favor of allowing you back into this school….if I had been Headmaster…"

Hp

"The last time you were Headmaster students rebelled against you! So that will just show how much of a Headmaster you were! You should have been in Azkaban." Potter was growing angry, lovely really. It had been so long since Severus had been able to talk to Potter in such a way.

"Yes, but you made sure I stayed out. Why, Potter, so you could take matters into your own hands and get revenge? Go ahead! I dare you!" Severus sneered.

The boy took a step closer and growled. "Perhaps I will!"

"I doubt you can, Potter. You should have done it when you had the chance weeks ago when I lay in a stupor, too weak to even raise my arm to ward off any flies."

"I should have left you at the Shrieking Shack, to rot in your own blood!" Potter suddenly screamed and the gleeful smirk froze on Severus' face. No, it couldn't be true; Potter couldn't have been the one who saved him.

By the widening of the dark green eyes and the smirk Potter send him; Potter had guessed it as he said in a cold voice.

"Hard to learn, isn't it? That the boy you hated for so long is also responsible for keeping you out of Azkaban and keeping you alive. So now what will you do with the knowledge that you are indebted to the one you loathe?"

Severus merely flicked his wand and the chair glided forward, pushing Potter down as he sneered at the younger male. "Foolish boy, perhaps you have forgotten like your father was wont to do that I have been saving your life since you set a foot in that school so if you wish to discuss debts then we are far from finished."

Potter flushed angrily at the mention of his father but Severus merely picked up his parchment and continued. "You are here for me to test your abilities so that Professor McGonagall may give you a schedule according to your abilities. She has also, for some unfathomable reason seen fit to send you to me to check upon any mishaps with any magic. Are there any mishaps, Potter?"

Hp

Harry frowned, his anger subsiding as he asked. "What do you mean with mishaps, sir?"

Snape frowned and sneered like Harry asked a stupid question when the wounded wizard stretched out long legs and said. "Such as magical depletion, trouble with casting spells or holding on the more magic and time the spells consume?"

Harry looked away as he thought long. He had been feeling tired after the battle with Voldemort but he didn't know if he had been depleted or not. He was still tired, longing for nothing more than to sleep and Snape cleared his throat impatiently as Harry lifted his eyes again.

"I don't know…."

"Trust a Potter not to even know if his magic is depleted or otherwise affected. You foolish boy, who else would know if your magic was affected…"

"I don't know if what I am feeling is because of my magic or because of something else." Harry snarled out, his anger resurfacing. This was going to be a long afternoon.

"Tell me!"

"I…."

"Potter, tell me! I need to know these things in case any of the spells you will be demonstrating will be too powerful to you and therefore they could be dangerous. A different schedule could be found for you then to adapt until you are back to your former self. It takes time until your magic is normal again if you have been depleted." Snape sounded like he was forcing himself to be calm and Harry took a deep breath, he would show Snape that he could be as calm as his Professor as he said.

"I am very tired and while I don't have any trouble with the spells I cast, I sometimes feel like it is too much. I have trouble focusing upon conversations sometimes and I don't like being in crowds or being the centre of attention. I…" Harry wondered if he should tell Snape the rest but then he decided to simply blunder on as he said. "….I sometimes suffer from headaches and I feel, like this blackness is there constantly at the back of my mind and, I don't sleep easily at night, though I am very tired easily…."

"Do you sometimes feel like you are in over your head, Potter?"

"No, not with my magic, but I do when I interact with people sometimes, or I feel like I want to disappear or blow something up. Plus I grow angry easily."

"Sounds more like a depression then depletion. I will test you on different aspects of magic and you will perform the spells. I will not push you too far because the trouble with depletion is that you can easily deplete yourself again if you overextend yourself. Stand please?"

Harry stood. What Snape said made sense but he wasn't depressed. He was just…he wasn't even sure what he was feeling. He just knew that it was very similar to what he had been feeling when Sirius had died but then he still knew what he had to do, he had to defeat Voldemort, now even that was gone and he wasn't sure what he was going to do next…

Hp

"Alright, Potter, that concludes the defense part of this test. Transfigure this chair into an iron cauldron if you would." Severus flicked his wand at his quill, noticing how many pages of the report he had already filled. He had noted every small thing, to the color of the spells Potter used to even the smallest hesitation.

At defense magic Potter was good, very good, though he usually fell back on the same spells time and time again, making it easier for an enemy to anticipate the next hex. If he would tutor Potter, he would take comfort in knowing that the boy could handle anything that came his way.

Potter also had the sense to duck when he couldn't think of a counter spell quickly enough, something Severus didn't see many times. Most students simply stood there, gaping stupidly as such a hex came their way. Severus was glad Potter wasn't somebody like that, especially with all the things the child had seen.

He shook his head firmly; he wasn't going to go down that memory lane. It would only be disastrous. He forced his attention back to see the cauldron standing there, smaller than the one he had originally planned but solid.

"Pour this water in it." Images could be fooling. Potter shot him a glare but did as requested. Severus smirked when a small puddle of water appeared on the floor.

"The design was good, but you need to work on making it more solid, Potter. If ever you need to transfigure something to hold water then you don't want it to run out on the bottom. Transfigure that cauldron into a sheep."

Hp

"Potter, transfigure it back!" There was loud bleating as the sheep walked across the room. Harry waved his wand but it wouldn't work. He tried to remember the incantation and the wand movements but his mind was strangely empty.

It was kind of funny to see the small sized sheep, smaller than its wild counterpart running around the rooms, frightened. Snape leaned forward and muttered a spell, aiming his wand and transfiguring the sheep back into a large wooly white chair, Harry stared at it.

He walked a bit closer when he noticed the chair was trembling when he did so. The moment he touched the chair, it bleated weakly. Harry startled and jumped backwards. Snape muttered the incantation again and then the chair went back to the same chair that Harry had first sat on, hard backed and wooden.

Harry turned back towards Snape. He was met by a raised wand and then the older wizard said. _"Finite."_

Harry growled lightly as he saw the calculating look in his Professor's dark eyes. "That concludes our test, Potter. I will owl the results to Professor McGonagall and you will receive word when the school year starts and when we have decided on what subjects to tutor you in."

Harry's brow furred as he asked. "What is the use of these tutor sessions then?"

"She didn't explain this to you?"

Harry mutely shook his head, reclaiming his chair as he faced the older wizard. Snape had barely lifted his wand and the older wizard was merely studying him. Harry had assumed it would have gone differently.

That Snape would challenge him and that they would have a duel, but obviously Snape was merely testing his abilities.

"Because of the war and because of the fact that some students are much more advance than their year mates, such as you and Mr. Longbottom, it would be foolish to place them in the seventh year Defense Against The Dark Arts class because the both of you are much more advanced. You will receive private tutoring in those subjects. Usually it is only one subject that is strong in one person."

"Oh, I thought it would be in the subjects I lack the practice in."

"No, Potter, we don't have that many teachers or that much time for you to excel in all subjects." Snape snarled.

Harry felt his annoyance growing. "Yeah, I suppose if I had a decent teacher for Potions, I would have excelled in that subject too."

"Well we can't give all the students books with added text in." Snape's eyes were narrowed and dangerous. Harry bitterly chewed out the insult.

"You can be on your way, Potter. No need to soil the room any longer than necessary." Snape took up the parchment and scanned what he had written, dismissing Harry. The green eyed teen glared at the older wizard for a moment but he sighed and quietly left the room.

He wasn't feeling any better than this morning, only some much needed anger and frustration had leaked out. Wondering who his tutor was going to be, Harry Apparated back to Grimauld Place.

Hp

Severus glanced up when Potter left the room. The test had gone well; Potter had indeed excelled at Defense magic, like Severus knew Potter would. But what was more, the things Potter had described sounded like a severe depression, not that Severus was surprised, Potter had gone through a lot in the past year and he might be a bit lost on what to do next.

The one who was going to tutor Potter would have his hands full and Severus prayed it wasn't going to be him but truth be told, he didn't feel very sure about that but only time would tell.

**That was it for now. I do hope that I didn't leave any plot holes except for the ones I intended. Review of course. **

**The next chapter: Severus goes back to Hogwarts for the Staff meeting, how will his collages react to seeing him again? Yet Severus isn't the only one at Hogwarts, Harry is there at the request of the Headmistress to help reset the ward? How will our Potions Master react to seeing the wand he was nearly killed for? Harry goes to visit the Weasleys to spend some time with Ginny only to discover that he wasn't the only one affected by the war, how will our hero react to jealousy from his best friend? And will their friendship survive a fight? How do our three friends react when they find out who their tutors are going to be and in what subjects? That and more in: Walls Breaking. **


	4. Walls Breaking

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. I am glad that you all like this story. Th****ey will soon return to Hogwarts. I am struggling a little with the way people respond after the war so if it gets a bit confusing, let me know. Let's begin. The odd spacing in the previous chapter is fixed. **

Owls in London were rare. Most people who lived in London had never even seen an owl, except perhaps in the zoo. Owls during the day were even rarer but then again most people in London knew better than to question things that couldn't be explained anyway. It could be the earth warming up or the pollution or just the general weirdness of animals.

For some people owls were never a rare sight. Nor had there been any owls which had been awaited with as much anticipation and dread, though perhaps the examination results were just a little more special.

The two owls flew down to the small square in a suburb of London. The people on Grimauld Place often assumed that an amusing numbering had occurred in their street. Who in the right mind would place number 11 next to number 13? But it had been the way it always had been and it would be the way it always was.

Yet there was a 12 Grimauld Place and it was the destination of the two owls. They flew in through the chimney of the nonexistent house. Inside the old kitchen an old house elf looked up. His puffy hair above the bald ears jumped a little as Kreacher jumped down as the two owls elegantly soared into the kitchen, landing on the rough table.

"Master Harry, you have letters." The old house elf squeaked up the stairs and then went back to whatever he was cooking and muttered to himself, too soft for anybody to hear as the owls waited patiently for the people to arrive the letters were for.

Harry came down the stairs at Kreacher's shout. Finally the letters have arrived. It seemed that Snape had kept his word and had indeed send out a letter to Professor McGonagall. For a while Harry had suspected that Snape would have said that Harry had never showed up and that he would need to redo the test and Harry was unsure if he could.

After the test he had felt better but he had been tired. His magic had been a bit unstable and Hermione had requested that he was to see Madam Pomfrey. But why should he? There was nothing wrong with him, all he had to do was to rest a little and it would be alright.

He sighed; sometimes it seemed like his life, his magic was taking longer to return to normal. Of course the connection to Voldemort was gone now and therefore Harry was suffering from his magic. His body and soul were completely his own, for once in his life and it just took some adjusting, that was all.

"Hermione?" He called.

"Yes, Harry?" Hermione's voice came from the library and Harry smiled. He should have known. He allowed himself a grin and walked to the library, entering the stuffy room. He glanced around. Bookcases adorned the walls and Hermione blinked up at him from a thick tome, her eyebrows pinched together in concentration.

Harry didn't even want to know what the book was about and he merely leaned against the doorframe, crossing his arms over his chest as he said. "Kreacher said that the letters from Hogwarts arrived."

He could see how Hermione tensed suddenly and it seemed that his own nervousness suddenly appeared. He merely grinned at her and she snapped the book shut and rose, giving him a weak smile. "Well, let's go and figure out who they placed us with."

Harry gave a nod and followed her. He took a deep breath as they walked down to the kitchen. He had anticipated the letters to come sooner but the second day after his eighteenth birthday, well it was still time enough he guessed. The school wasn't ready to get started until nearly two months later.

Harry glanced around and sighed, except for him and Hermione and Kreacher of course, the house was silent. For a while Ron had considered moving here too but eventually he had decided to stay home, to help his family with the recent loss of Fred.

Harry shivered at the memory of the eyes that stared up at the ceiling unblinkingly. Of the smile that had been forever frozen on Fred's face. The smile that never once showed on George's face again. He forced himself to return from the memories.

It was easier not to think these things, even if Hermione kept telling him the healthy way to mourn people was to talk about them. What if Harry didn't want to talk? Besides, who did he have to talk to? The Weasleys? Ron? Ginny? Everybody had their own problems; no it was best if life went back to normal as fast as possible.

Even his birthday had been quiet. He had enjoyed dinner at the Weasleys but Mrs. Weasley had not been up to her usual standards. But what could you expect? She had just lost a son and while she tried hard, Harry could see she was doing her best, you could see that her heart just wasn't in it.

"Harry Potter, sir, Kreacher dismissed the owls…" Kreacher bowed so deep that the tip of his nose touched the ground.

Harry was distracted by the two letters that lay on the table as he said dismissingly. "Yes, thank you Kreacher."

Hermione took a deep breath and for a moment she touched Harry's hand before she took her letter, her eyes shining as she asked. "So shall we open them at the Burrow? I am sure that both Ron and Ginny have received their letters as well."

Right, Ron and Ginny. Ginny would be in the same year as he was. Harry took a deep breath and then gave a nod. He wondered who his tutor was, who would be seen fit to teach him Defense and such things? Could it possibly be that he would be with Neville or would he be on his own?

He sighed; there was only one way to find out. He took Hermione's hand and with one last look at Kreacher who gave them a smile and then went back to stirring whatever he was cooking, they Apparated towards the Weasleys home, the Burrow.

Hp

_Plop_

Harry's ear rang as they arrived on the grassy ground surrounding what seemed like an unstable house. The Burrow had always been a place of joy and comfort to Harry but now he felt shivers run over him as he glanced at the crooked building. Smoke came from the chimney and Harry wondered if somebody had heard them approach.

Hermione looked at him and then at the letter she clenched in her hand. Harry grinned at her. "Shall we wait for Ron or can't you wait?" He asked.

"Oh Harry, I am so bad and predictable, aren't I? It is just; everything will go back to normal. We will go back to Hogwarts and we will get to study again and forget about the past year." She cried out.

"Well then open it." Hermione gave him such a relieved and happy smile that it made Harry's own smile falter. What had he been thinking bringing his friends last year on that camping trip from hell? He forced the thoughts to the back of his mind with a scowl as Hermione gave a happy cry.

It was the only warning Harry got before she threw her arms around him and said. "Oh Harry, this is amazing. Professor McGonagall is my tutor and the letter says that I will be ready to take my NEWTS in all my subjects if I want and she will help me and oh…."

Harry could only pad her on the back, genuinely happy for her. It only made him more curious who his own tutor was.

"Ah the great Harry Potter once more swoops in to save the day." The soft voice of Ron made Harry frown as Hermione flung her arms around the taller red haired wizard.

"What do you mean, Ron?" He asked his voice a bit hard as he felt frustration well up within him.

"Well if he isn't saving the world he is trying to get reporters to take pictures of him and his lady friend!" Ron's voice was cold and Harry said.

"What are you on about, mate? Hermione was just glad that she got a tutor she liked."

"Oh, that makes it alright then, doesn't it?" Ron challenged, his voice rising. Harry found himself taking back, his green eyes narrowed and his magic rose a little. What had gotten into Ron?

"I have Professor McGonagall as my tutor, Ron. Have you opened your letter yet? Come inside, it is too hot to remain outside…" Hermione gave Harry a look that told him not to push it. Ron had been in a strange mood ever since Fred died and for a while Harry had tried to ignore it and to treat Ron normally but it was getting harder and harder to deal with it with patience.

Ron gave Harry a hard look and then began to walk inside, allowing Hermione to drag him forward, Harry following in their wake with a sigh, the unopened letter still in his hand.

Would this be the welcome he would receive or was it just his imagination that he thought Ron was blaming him for Fred's death? It could be, but Harry got a very funny feeling about it in the pit of his stomach. This wasn't the last of it.

Hp

The kitchen of the Burrow looked the same as always but there was something tense in the air. Something Harry couldn't quite place but what made him ill at ease as he sat down at the shabby table with the mismatching chairs.

He toyed with his letter, trying to smile at Hermione as she beamed at him. Mrs. Weasley bustled about as she poured them drinks and took her freshly cooked biscuits out of the oven with her wand before she cast a cooling charm on them and then she directed them at the table.

"So we know that Hermione will be studying with Minerva and Ronald with Professor Flitwick I am left to wonder who will Harry be studying with?" The voice of the motherly woman was strong but Harry could hear an undercurrent of grief in it he didn't like at all.

"Yes, dear precious Harry is left last because he is so important that…." Harry's head snapped up as he heard the soft murmur from Ron. His best friend met his gaze without flinching, for a moment anger burning in the blue eyes. Anger that Harry was unfamiliar with and which was kind of frightening.

He decided to ignore it and then opened his letter, eyes scanning the parchment in front of him.

He frowned, that was strange. Hermione leaned forward, Ron's arm falling away from around her shoulders as she asked, seeing Harry's look. "Who is it? Is it…Snape?" Her voice shook.

"No, it is from Professor McGonagall…."

"Oh, let me guess, they wish for the _great and special Harry Potter _to share?" Ron's smile was mocking and Harry looked up. He was getting really tired and fed up with this. He opened his mouth to say something when Mrs. Weasley said.

"Ronald, stop this!"

Ron looked at his mother, frowning at her before his eyes shot back down to Harry and Hermione said anxiously. "Go on, Harry."

"I don't need to _share _at all. She is asking if I want to go to her office as soon as possible once I get the letter. She says she wants to talk to me."

"I told you he was special. So he gets special treatment simply because he is _returning _to Hogwarts." Ron angrily broke in, looking at his mother. The anger was in his eyes again and Harry got to his feet, shaking with anger himself.

"And what is that supposed to mean? Or is this the whole old argument again? The one where you feel like you aren't special enough because you don't have this damn scar!" Harry knew he should treat Ron normally but he found he couldn't

Ron got to his feet as well and they glared at one another from across the table. Harry didn't even acknowledge Ginny as she came into the room. Hermione was staring at both of them, looking like she was watching a tennis match.

"I wouldn't want your scar even if they offered me money for it!" Ron snarled his hand on his wand.

"Well lucky me then, having to wear a scar that reminds me of my family all day! Oh I would love it if I could get rid of it."

"Well let me help you with that. Perhaps I will grow famous for murdering Harry Potter."

"Like you aren't special enough for having a normal family," Harry growled.

"A family who has been hurt because they side themselves with Harry Potter. You had nothing to lose when you fought last year, I did!"

"Is that why you walked out on us?" Harry knew he was being unfair and as he watched Ron's eyes darken and his face color he knew that it had been a very cheap shot. Hermione gasped but she kept silent. Harry was shaking but it felt so good to get some of the anger out and to take it out on Ron, even if he knew he could damage their friendship by doing this but he needed Ron to return to normal.

"I walked out on _you _because it was the same old story again. Harry Potter this and Harry Potter that and now you do it again, only you matter, nobody else! You don't care who you hurt or what other people sacrificed to be around you. You have no family so you don't have anything to lose and yet you still try to steal something that belongs to me."

Harry felt the blow profoundly as he glared at Ron before he hissed. "And what have I stolen from you that belonged to you?"

"You are trying to take things up with Hermione!" The statement was so strange that Harry had to fight the urge to laugh madly. Hermione jumped to her feet and even Mrs. Weasley exclaimed. "Ronald!"

Ginny's eyes had narrowed but Harry didn't even notice as he forced himself to be calm as he smirked and said. "You are definitely losing it mate, if you think that me and Hermione are just anything else but friends. But perhaps if you had been less absorbed in yourself, well you would have seen it."

And with those words and the letters clenched into his hand, Harry walked out of the kitchen and into the hallway. He was seething with anger and he heard, right before he walked out.

"Ronald, that wasn't fair and besides I don't belong to anybody but myself!" Hermione's voice sounded a bit cold.

"Yeah well, I, it is confusing and hard, Hermione. I just, he is being Harry and I don't know how else to reach him!" Ron's voice was still angry but Harry tried not to focus upon their conversation.

"You could try talking to him, Ron. He will understand that you feel responsible for Fred's death."

"Harry?" Harry had to tune Hermione out and he couldn't hear Ron's reply, he was sure that he didn't even want to hear it and he saw Ginny standing there. Her eyes locked with his and her brown eyes were determent as she said.

"Don't blame Ron. He is an impossible git at the moment. I am sure he will come around."

Harry felt his anger rise again and he said in a tight voice. "I would rather not discuss Ron."

Ginny smiled at that and she leaned in closer to him, closing the distance between them as she said in a light voice. "Good, cause I don't want to discuss Ron either."

Harry should feel elated he really should as she smiled at him in the old way that she used to but he just couldn't. He couldn't feel anything past a sense to get away. He shook his head, forcing himself to smile as he forced himself to wrap his arms around Ginny and said.

"Then what do you want to discuss?"

"Who said I want to discuss anything?" Ginny asked her lips impossibly close. Harry could only stare down at her and then she pressed her lips against him while she whispered. "Happy birthday, Harry."

Then her lips were upon his and Harry knew it should feel like bliss and that finally everything was returning to normal and that he should feel light and happy, everything that it should have been like it had been when they had first gotten together but it wasn't. It felt strange and awkward. Like it was another person kissing him, not his sweet and innocent Ginny.

He felt strange, why was he feeling this way? He had another chance with Ginny and everything was normal. Voldemort had been defeated so why should he not be happy to be with Ginny? Why was he feeling so weird when he should be elated that he was kissing Ginny again?

It seemed that Ginny felt it too because she pulled away and smiled at him. "It feels strange, doesn't it?"

Harry could only nod.

"I am sure that soon it will feel just like the old days again." And as Harry gave a relieved nod, he secretly suspected that perhaps he didn't want things to feel like the old days again.

Hp

Severus eyed the old menacing castle before him with dark eyes. Hogwarts, his past where he had lived his worst years and his best and his _home. _Yes, home to those not wanted in the Wizarding World. A home for magical children and outcasts, such as him, Voldemort, Albus Dumbledore and Harry Potter.

He shook his head sharply before he began to limp up the long winding road towards the castle. The boars that stood guard at the gates watched him pass silently, once more watch him return nearly brokenly to a place he had no right to call his own.

He had stood here nearly 20 years ago in the same predicament. His hopes shattered and his dreams lost or abandoned. He sighed, only now he was sure that what little respect he had managed to gather for himself would be utterly lost now.

There was no protection, except perhaps for Potter's and he simply refused to even consider that. He would be stuck with the brat until his dying day, no thank you very much. He sneered at the thought.

Albus was dead and everybody knew he had been responsible, everybody knew that. They would all condemn him for it anyway.

All he could do was to face them with his head held high and his sneer tightly in place and if somebody could ever tell if Severus was confident or not, well they were sorely mistaken because he had survived worse things, if only he had a little bit more hope for the future to make it easier.

Well at least Potter wasn't here which was a relief, though Severus couldn't even begin to realize just how soon he would see Harry again.

Hp

"You summoned me?" Harry stepped into the circular office. The stern witch behind the big desk glanced up with a smile. Her eyes locked on his face within a moment and Harry forced himself to meet her eyes calmly. He would not look away; he was no frightened first year anymore.

The portraits in the Headmistress' office shuffled, some asleep and some awake. Harry hadn't been here in three months and then all the portraits had been asleep or away, watching the battle. Harry shook his head sharply as memories, not his own, were threatening to rise to the surface. He had given those memories back so why should he remember them again?

He had shown the memories to the Wizengamot and truth be told, he had been glad to be rid of them. If only he could get rid of them inside his head as well he would have been even happier. He forced a smile to his face, though it faded a little when a deep voice said.

"Harry, my dear boy, you look well." Professor Albus Dumbledore, or his portrait at least, was sporting deep purple robes and his blue eyes twinkled behind the half moon spectacles that stood on the very tip of the crooked nose. Harry suddenly felt something well up within him.

He couldn't quite place the emotion, it wasn't hate but he felt angry. How come Dumbledore could pretend that everything was fine between them when he had not as much as offered an apology for the way he had misled Harry and had not even bothered to tell him the truth?

Harry sighed and finally decided to settle for a good, "Hello, sir."

He refocused his attention back on Professor McGonagall but it seemed that Professor Dumbledore couldn't be ignored so easily. The older wizard tried again. "So how are you?"

Harry glanced back up and said coolly. "I am fine, Professor."

Dumbledore frowned and then said. "Good, good, so how is Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley?"

"Why would you care to know, Professor? You never cared for them before so," His anger burst forward. The anger that had always simmered just below the surface these days and Harry hissed sharply at the older wizard.

The portrait looked taken aback and if it was possible Dumbledore would have taken a step back when Professor McGonagall used her wand to create a disturbance in the room. Harry glanced up, startled when he wanted to continue to shout at Professor Dumbledore but the Headmistress of his school turned in her chair to look at the painting behind her.

"Albus, please go somewhere else. Go bother somebody in the staff room and see who has returned yet for the staff meeting."

"But Minerva?"

"Albus, for once do as I tell you! I have some business to attend to with Harry and this is no business of yours. Seeing as he cannot control himself when you are in the room or that you cannot seem to take a hint when one is given to you shows me that I have to send one of you out of the room and that will have to be you, since I have to speak to Harry." The older witch's voice was stern and Harry looked away, feeling chastised.

With a rustle of robes Professor Dumbledore disappeared and Professor McGonagall looked back at Harry. "Well, Potter, how are you?"

Harry looked up. "I am fine."

She bristled at him and said. "Yes, obviously you are not but that is the reason you are here. I am sure you must wonder who I assigned to be your tutor this year. Well Potter, to be blunt, you are a special case as you know very well. You may not like it but you need a teacher who is capable of meeting your needs and to still be able to teach you the necessary spells. You excel in Defense so I saw it necessary to put you with a teacher who can anticipate what you must learn. You will go back to the same classes as all seventh year except for Defense."

Harry gave a nod that made sense. He had figured it out for himself. He pulled at the sleeves of his jumper and glanced up when Professor McGonagall ruffled through a file of parchment that she had in front of her. She read a line and frowned before looking up again. When she steepled her fingers together and looked at him, Harry grew uncomfortable.

"The thing is, Potter, you are a very powerful wizard and the thing you have done three months ago is extraordinary but it is in no way normal for a wizard of 17 years old. For what Professor Snape tells me, you are suffering from various things."

"I am sure that his report of me was excellent." Harry couldn't quite keep the anger out of his voice.

"Actually, Potter, for the past between you and Professor Snape, it was. It was brutally honest as only that man can be but it was excellent. There is no questioning your abilities or your talents Potter but there are some things that concerned me. And that is one of the reasons why I have invited you here."

Harry sat in his chair, staring ahead as Professor McGonagall paused to summon tea. She held out the teapot for him but he shook his head. He wanted to know what that traitor had dared to write about him.

Professor McGonagall took a sip and then put her cup down again, saying in her sharp voice. "I know there is no love lost between you and Professor Snape but he put some things in the report that concerned not only me but him as well. He said that you suffer from magical depletion and what is most likely a severe depression. He of course put in the report how you managed not to obey every order he gave but I know to take that with a grain of salt."

Harry sat forward; would she finally tell him who his tutor was?

Professor McGonagall took another sip of her tea and then said with a smile at no doubt Harry's anxious face. "Well, Potter, that is why I have decided together with Madam Pomfrey to set you up with a tutor to aid you with magic without getting you depleted. The quicker you recover the easier it will be for you to adjust back to the daily normality of life. As for your mental state, the previous year has been extremely hard on all students, though I don't doubt in your case it was just a bit harder. I would hereby like to extend the invitation that you can always come and talk to me if something is amiss, Potter."

Harry gave a nod and murmured a quick thank you. Suddenly he wished he had taken some tea, this waiting seemed endless.

"I have decided to appoint you to Professor Severus Snape…." The world seemed to tilt in front of Harry's eyes as he jumped to his feet.

"_Him?_ How could you? Do you know what he has done? Do you know how he used to treat me and you wish to put me with him? How can that…."

"Harry James Potter! Control yourself!" Harry sat back down as Professor McGonagall snapped at him.

The witch ran a hand over her face and Harry could suddenly see how tired she was. He felt guilty all of a sudden. He tried to shake his head to clear the feeling away and Professor McGonagall said, her voice suddenly gentle.

"I know this is far from easy, Harry but Severus really is the best tutor for you. His experience in Defensive magic is excellent and somehow he draws out the best in you. His assessment of nearly any situation is wonderful and he has teaching methods that you need right now. Besides, I thought that you needed some normality in your life and if Professor Snape can give it to you in such a way to be meaningful to you then so be it."

Harry could only smile grimly at that. He sighed. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel about the situation. For the whole year he had thought about Snape and what the older wizard had done. He had wanted to be the one to kill Snape or to have his revenge but it seemed that that honor had been reserved for Voldemort himself.

Harry had been filled with horror the moment he had seen Voldemort set the snake loose on Snape. Whatever the older wizard had done he hadn't done anything to deserve such a punishment or death. But now that Snape had survived, thanks to Harry or at least partly, Harry could go back to hating Snape in peace.

But now he would need to spent time with the man he detested then how could he keep up the hate? Either it would consume him or…. There was so much he wanted to ask Snape. Snape had known his mother, had known Lily when she was a small girl and when she first came to Hogwarts.

What had caused Lily to break the friendship? What had happened between her and Snape that she couldn't forgive him for? Harry shifted uncomfortably. Had his mother been so petty, that she had been unable to forgive a friend when it had become apparent that her friend needed her, so that he was willing to give his whole life away, bind his whole future to her memory to protect her son? It was no wonder Snape hated him so.

Harry would hate himself too if he reminded somebody of what they had lost years ago. Was that the reason Snape had turned out so bitter, because he loved a dead woman, a woman who had never forgiven him? Harry reminded him of what Snape had lost….

Harry sighed. He glanced up at Professor McGonagall to notice that she was watching him. There was a small smile playing around the thin stern lips of the Headmistress and then she asked. "I would like to make a request, Mr. Potter?"

"As long as it does not mean that I have to teach or that I have to move to a different house or go and live with Professor Snape, then if it is within my power, then yes." Harry answered.

She appeared pleased and she said. "Since you are the rightful owner of the Elder Wand and I know that you wish to return it to Professor Dumbledore's tomb I have to ask you if you are willing to adjust the wards over the castle. Many were tied to Albus and were passed on to me when he died but many were broken when Voldemort attacked. We need for the safety of the students to add them again. Why not do so with the most powerful wand in history?"

"Will I be the only student to adjust the wards?"

"Yes, since you are the wielder of the Elder Wand. Many of the teachers have added in the past weeks since we rebuild the castle added their own wards and now only you and Professor Snape remain."

Harry got a funny feeling in his stomach and he looked around. "Is he here?"

Professor McGonagall frowned and then she said. "He is here for the Welcoming Festival of the staff members. Now, shall we go down and strengthen the wards?"

Harry could only nod as he really hoped not to run in to Severus Snape.

Hp

Severus took a deep breath as he pushed open the door to the Great Hall. His leg ached from having to limp all the way up to the castle. He was sure the house elves had moved his trunks and other belongings to his rooms. Yet he had no breath left within him to go down and then go back up the stairs again. It would take time to rebuild such things.

He could hear the voices inside and it took every ounce of his will not to turn back and to bury under his blankets. But all last year he had endured the looks of his colleagues so why not now? Was it now because instead of hate and anger there would be pity and possibly even respect in their eyes, respect because of a decision he had kept hidden for years, that he had been in love with Lily Evans for most of his adult life.

Yes for most of his adult life but it was hard to love a dead woman, especially when in the dead of the night, Severus couldn't help but blame her for dying and not allowing him to move on. Any fault had been his own of course but for so long he had tried to fit into the picture that she wanted him to be but he wasn't that kind of man.

He was petty and bitter because his nature and life had made him so. When had life ever been kind to him even when Severus had made an effort? He sighed; well he was left empty handed now so what that he couldn't try to make a new start? There was no more precedence needed.

"Severus?" Severus would recognize the squeaky voice anywhere that belonged to the Charms Professor.

He looked down to not only see Fillius Flitwick but also at Madam Hooch. The yellow eyes of the short grey haired flying instructor were a bit narrowed but then his slightly older staff member surprised him by reaching out with a hand. Severus watched with large eyes as she rested it on his shoulder and softly said with a wolfish grin. "Well, do you need aid or can you manage without falling flat on your face?"

The first thing that came to his mind and face was a scowl and Hooch grinned as she said. "I see that you are still unable to smile."

"Trust me, I don't need the aid of a woman who is steadier in the air then on the ground. " Severus snarled as he limped towards the high table.

Horace Slughorn was already there, eating it seemed and Severus sneered. He was aware that the tension in the room deepened when he entered even when there were only a handful of people in the room.

His steps were shadowed by Hooch and Flitwick already darted up towards the table. He pulled back a chair but Severus ignored him and the kind gesture by walking past the chair and sinking down in the next one, he couldn't quite contain the sigh that escaped him.

"I am glad that our old Severus is back. I would be worried that now his cover is blown he would be all cheery and smiley. It would have been like having Gilderoy Lockhart again." Hooch smiled and Severus watched in horror.

"It seems I have made a mistake to come back then if you are already comparing me with that nutcase." He shook his head.

Hooch merely grinned but as Severus forced himself to relax in the chair; he waited for the proverbial bomb to fall. When it be when somebody began to ask questions or accused him of different things, things he had done.

He watched as the people assembled in the room looked around at one another until he snapped. "What?" His teeth were bared in a growl and finally Flitwick said.

"We were all there at the trial, Severus and we saw the memories so we know what happened." Severus could feel horror well up within him. He would have fled but he was unsure if he could make it to the door, he had never been so glad when Minerva called for his attention.

Hp

Harry twirled the wand in his hand. It felt strange and it brimmed with power, shooting sparks. Harry shivered and he longed to throw it away. He looked around the Entrance Hall. It was strange to be back at school where only so long away a thing had taken place that still haunted his dreams.

His stomach was churning as he thought about having to use magic again. How long would he be able to hold out? He forced his mind away from those thoughts. He was strong, he had to be.

He glanced to the closed door to the Great Hall where Professor McGonagall had disappeared through. She said that she was going to get Snape but why would the older wizard be here when Harry strengthened the wards?

He frowned as he stared outside. The sound of a door being opened startled him and he turned around. He could feel a mask sliding over his face as he spotted Snape limping towards him. The older wizard gifted him with a slight sneer and Harry checked himself. He would be damned if he would be the first to utter a word.

He met the dark eyes unflinchingly and then turned as Professor McGonagall preceded them towards the grounds; he wasn't going to show any weakness in front of Snape, ever.

Hp

Harry tried to focus but his concentration was slipping. He shook his head, murmuring another incantation under his breath. Sweat was making it hard for him to see as he blinked, forcing the hand that was holding the Elder Wand to remain steady.

They were deep in trying to wave the magic together and any mistake could mean a flaw in the wards. He had to focus, he had to do this but he was so tired.

He couldn't be slipping already. They had only been at this for an hour, he just needed to hold on a little longer and then he could Apparate back home and rest….but it seemed so long…

Hp

Severus watched out of the corner of his eye as the wand that Potter held in his hand trembled a little. He allowed his magic to flow from him and released it. He looked at the younger male standing to the right but when he found no other weakness he focused back upon his own wards.

No doubt the wards Potter added were a bit stronger but he wondered if Potter had ever done this before. It seemed so because up until a moment ago Potter had no trouble with the magic that he used.

Severus' head snapped to the right when Potter suddenly swayed. He looked to his left where Minerva was standing. She too was eyeing Potter. "Harry?" She called, trying to catch Potter's attention.

The brat didn't acknowledge her. It seemed that Potter was gone too deep within the magic to hear either of them. "Potter, stop it!" Severus snapped.

But again the brat didn't hear him. Potter swayed again and Severus knew that soon Potter would be too exhausted to continue. He looked back once more to Minerva and then she gave a nod.

He sighed, would it always be up to him to rescue Potter? He closed the distance, resting a hand on Potter's tense shoulder.

"Potter, focus, end the spell." He instructed but the only response he got was the dull green eyes flickering to him for a mere moment as Potter mumbled low under his breath.

Hp

Harry could feel his magic slipping and faltering. He was so tired that it was an incredibly hard struggle to force his eyes to remain open. He tried to focus about the mumbling around him but he couldn't.

He tried to focus upon the fingers that were on his shoulder but he couldn't, all he could do was allow himself to sink down in the darkness, knowing that the arms behind him had always caught him when he fell, even when he had never wanted them to.

**That is it for now. It is a kind of cliffy and you will find out in the next chapter what happens to Harry. **

**In the next chapter: Harry wakes up in the Hospital Wing but what will his reaction be to finding himself in the Hospital Wing? How will Snape react when he learns that Harry is assigned to him as a student? Will he storms down to the Hospital Wing to demand answers? And will Harry possible get some answers for his own questions? That, lots of shouting and Professor McGonagall finally puts her foot down in: Confrontations. **


	5. Confrontations

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks so much for the review. I am sorry it takes me such a long time to update but I simply don't have the time to update earlier. I do hope that some of the people who read Paths Taking will also be reading this fic. It may take a bit longer for them to get together because of their past but anyway, let's begin.**

**Just my take on magical depleting: that it will affect the body like an illness. Like we require energy to do things, for magical people it is the same. If they are too exhausted, it will be like with us, they are cranky, muscles aching and such things. I do hope it makes sense. **

"He is my _WHAT_?" Severus finally did lose control of his already fragile voice. It broke hoarsely and the wounded Professor opened his mouth a few times as he tried to produce a sentence, yet no words were forthcoming. He was seething, one could tell in the way he moved, with jerky movements, how his eyes blazed and flashed across the room, daring anybody to approach him.

Severus paced the length of the floor of the circular office twice before he managed to find the words to hiss. "How could you think to place Potter with me? Haven't you been present for the last seven years, woman? Don't you know how Potter and I behave around each and towards each other? In case your old age is playing up and you seem to have mysteriously forgotten what our feelings are towards each other, we _loath _each other. We hate each other, when put in the same room together we will hex and insult one another. We do not mix well and now you force me to tutor the boy. Did your brains disappear when the Dark Lord had been defeated…?"

"Severus!" Minerva finally snapped. The Potions Master was ranting as he took another deep breath to further hurt his voice as he wanted to continue speaking. Minerva made a silent gesture with her hand and inviting the younger man to sit as she said. "I will tell you the same thing that I told Harry Potter, Severus."

"Oh, was that after you held his hand and petted his head and told him to come to you if his mean and nasty tutor did something little baby Potter didn't like…."

"Severus Snape, I have just had about enough of your attitude, young man!" Minerva finally snapped, slamming her hand down on the table. Severus merely huffed, his arms crossed over his chest as he stared down at her. "Sit down this instance!"

In that instance she sounded so much like the former formidable professor that she had been that Severus sat down. His scowl deepened and then Minerva took a deep breath before she said. "I am not going to pretend that the relationship between you and Potter is anything less than…horrible but I have to remind you of your duty as a teacher here, Severus. Much has changed since last year and events have been set into motion with a dazzling speed. I did not anticipated that so many students would be returning for seventh year but they have and all of them need aid, Harry perhaps most of all. You are the best person qualified to deal with this, Severus. I know that is it hard to digest but you and Potter are much alike. Regardless of what you have to say about this subject I will not change my mind. You are Harry Potter's tutor for this year and that is final!"

Severus merely sighed and his scowl deepened. He got to his feet and after casting a very dark look at Minerva McGonagall left the room, he had a student to check up to.

Inside the room said Headmistress got a very bad feeling in her stomach and it took her a moment before she rose to her feet to hurry after the still raging Slytherin. This wasn't going to be pretty.

Hp

Dull green eyes opened as they blinked into the candlelight that came from his bedside table. Harry Potter wondered for a moment where he was as his tired eyes focused upon the clean white bed that he was tucked into. He reached for his glasses, grimacing as his very arm hurt as he tried to reach it. His fingers closed around his glasses and he hastily put them on and as his vision flared to life so did his headache.

Harry groaned as he realized he was in the Hospital Wing. But how did he get here? The last thing he could remember was that they were adjusting the wards but then after that everything was hazy. It hurt his head even to think about it…

"Ah, Mr. Potter, you are awake." The soft voice of the Matron and mediwitch of Hogwarts School Madam Poppy Pomfrey came as she bustled to his bedside. In her hands was a vial of the purple sleep potion Dreamless Sleep. Harry groaned at seeing it.

"Yeah and you are going to put me to sleep again." He grumbled, trying to sit up. He was assaulted by a wave of dizziness and gasped for breath, doubling over. He could feel Madam Pomfrey's arm around his shoulder as she chastened him gently.

"Now Mr. Potter, you have been through a traumatic event today but I had imagined that you had better control of your magic. Professor Snape brought you in when you lost conscious when they were altering the wards. He had to use his own magic to break the magic you were using."

"I am sure he loved that. It will be another failure that he can lord over me." Harry whispered bitterly. He was looking down, not meeting the concerned eyes of the mediwitch. He was feeling bad enough as it was and he really didn't need to know that Snape had brought him to the Hospital Wing to make him feel even worse; he was doing a fantastic job of that on his own.

"I am sure that the pleasure in 'lording' it over you, as you so eloquently say, Potter, is greatly diminished by the fact that you are doing such an amazing job of feeling miserable all on your own." Snape sneered, his voice slightly hoarse as the older wizard entered the Hospital Wing.

Despite the dizziness, his fatigue and everything else Harry growled softly as he snapped. "And what are _you _doing here?"

Madam Pomfrey made a noise in the back of her throat but Harry ignored it in favor of glaring at Snape with narrowed eyes. It seemed that it didn't matter as Snape merely smirked and answered.

"A little bit of respected is in order, Potter. You are speaking to your savior after all." Snape settled against the bed opposite the one Harry was sitting up in.

"Respect is to be earned, not to be demanded or requested simply because you save somebody." Harry replied hotly. Snape's lip curled as he replied.

"You would know all about that, wouldn't you, Potter?" Snape whispered and Harry felt a wave of rage as he struggled to control himself. Madam Pomfrey looked disapproving at Snape as she said.

"Now, really Severus. Harry is wounded and he is in need of rest."

"I am fine." Harry mumbled, embarrassed, still glaring at Snape. The older wizard's lips merely curled in disdain as he said, with a glint in his eyes as they focused on Harry's.

"As Potter's tutor it is my job to look after his welfare if, or should I say when he is incapable. Besides, to be able to cure what Potter has is simply impossible, it is generic and while I would applaud if you were to go back in time and stop James Potter from being born, I think you will find it tricky since most of the Time Turners that the Ministry used were destroyed two years ago, mysteriously enough, something about a dream and a prophecy." Snape send another smirk Harry's way who felt his blood starting to boil. He bit his lip to prevent himself from lashing out.

He roughly shook himself loose from Madam Pomfrey's arm to proof he could sit up. His eyes were still focused on Snape's face and after a moment he said. "Well, it must be a shame then that I also carry some of my mother's genes, isn't it?"

Harry waited until Snape would color but all the older wizard did was say in a bored sounded voice. "Yes, I am glad that you have managed to deduct that on your own, Potter. About the only useful assumption you ever made."

Harry merely smirked coolly as he retorted, sure he had Snape this time. "Well, I am sure you would have liked me to look like you. Mustn't that have been a pity to see your greatest enemy and somebody who was ten times better then you marry the love of your life? But I bet that it really got your blood boiling to know that you were the one who destroyed the ties that were between you and Lily and then thinking you can honor her memory by being mean to her son for no reason at all other than that he looks like his father, how pitiful."

Harry could see how Madam Pomfrey stiffened and how Snape colored nastily at his words. His lips curled and then he said. "How sad you are."

"Well I am not as sad as one who manages to get everybody who ever cared about him killed!" Snape suddenly snapped and snarled at him, dark eyes blazing.

Harry froze as he suddenly whispered. "What do you mean?"

Madam Pomfrey was in vain trying to get them to stop but even she couldn't suppress a small sound in the back of his throat as Snape crossed his arms over his chest and said, smiling nastily about it as his eyes focused on Harry's white face. "Have you never compared the count between us, Potter? You were always so keen to blame Black's death and your father's death upon me. Well, let's count shall we? Yes, I was responsible for your parents' deaths that make two for me. Then there was Cedric Diggory in your fourth year, oh and wait, you also managed to kill Quirrell in your first year, well that makes it even then, but let's continue shall we?"

Harry could feel his breathing exhilarating as he continued to stare at Snape, unable to look away or to tell him to stop.

"Then there was Black in your fifth year, dying when he tried to save you, so that makes it three for you…Then there was Dumbledore last year, so we are even again and then there is the Final Battle, want me to continue, Potter?" Snape whispered with a gleeful smirk.

Harry shook his head; he didn't want to hear it as he squeezed his eyes tightly shut but the words came nevertheless.

"You are solemnly responsible for the deaths of 50 people, Potter, students or otherwise. Granted, you did defeat the Dark Lord so I suppose I will take a few people away but still, congratulations, Potter, you win this one. You managed o get about 48 people killed, what an achievement…"

"Shut up!" Harry screamed, his eyes snapped open as he stared at Snape.

"What did you say to me, Potter?" Snape whispered, expression frozen on his face.

"I told you to shut up, you hateful git." Harry swung his legs over the bed. He was trembling with rage, shaking so hard that it was hard to think calmly.

His wand was in his hand and it shot sparks, making him even dizzier then he already was. Madam Pomfrey was looking wide eyed between the two of them, watching the scene unfold as Harry got to his feet and said. "How dare you? _How dare you? _You of all people! You killed Dumbledore, you…you…."

He was losing track of his sentences as he realized just how weak he was. Tears were making it harder for him to see, Snape was right, he was responsible, no matter how much he may pretend otherwise. If it hadn't been for him, then those students would still be alive and Remus and Tonks, if he had just surrendered when he had the change that none of this would have happened and he…

His knees gave out from underneath him and despite knowing what was happening he couldn't help it as the ground rushed up to meet him. His wand fell from limp fingers and rolled away over the floor. Harry hid his face in his hands and wept, even when quick footsteps came his way and Madam Pomfrey said. "Now, Mr. Potter, there is no reason to upset yourself so."

"Leave him, Poppy. Go and get a Calming Draught from your office and then floo Minerva…she will want to see Potter soon…." Snape's voice was gruff.

"And leave you alone with him, Severus? Are you mad?" She hissed.

"For once, Poppy, do as you are told! Did you see what Potter has seen? Do you have any idea of what he has been through?" There was a hard edge to Snape's voice.

"And you do?"

"No, but I do have a better understanding then most." Snape's voice dropped lower and Madam Pomfrey sighed before she said her hand warm on Harry's shoulder.

"You are mad if I consent to leave him alone with you, Severus! After what you just said to the boy?"

"I am not a boy!" Harry angrily bit out. He was shaking with rage suddenly. He had defeated Voldemort; he wasn't a small child anymore. He coughed as another sob lodged itself in his throat but the burning hate refused to die away.

He hated Snape even more then he normally did. How could he even think that he would be able to return to school? Why had he saved Snape? He should have left him to die….he should…

Sobs were still trying to rise as Harry tried his best to keep them inside, they were making him hick up and he could see Snape rolling his eyes as the older wizard murmured under his breath, through still quite audible. "Impossible, you can't even cry properly, Potter?"

"Severus Snape! Stop that this instance!" Madam Pomfrey drew herself up to her full height as she marched over to Snape; there was no other word for it. She raised her hand, as if she wanted to slap Snape and much to Harry's amazement, the Potions Master recoiled and seemed to shrink, through he never once backed down, staring down at his hooked nose at the mediwitch with unfathomable black eyes.

Something seemed to pass between them and then Snape suddenly snapped his eyes away, blinking, focusing upon something else. Madam Pomfrey, a sad expression on her face as she touched him upon the shoulder. Angrily Snape shook it off and Harry watched as Madam Pomfrey gave him a tiny smile as she ordered. "Now, make yourself useful, Severus and lift Harry back up into the bed. I am getting old and I can't lift him…"

"I believe that you are qualified to use magic, Poppy, unlike some." Snape snarled his voice low and quite.

Harry could feel the black eyes pass over his own as Snape paused but he refused to acknowledge it. He growled angrily when he tried to reach for his wand. It was too far away and then Snape stepped forward and bend over to pick up the piece of wood. Harry wanted to pry it from Snape's fingers but he knew he was too weak.

"And are you also aware of the danger of using magic on a depleted person? Mr. Potter's magic is unstable and if he upsets himself any further he can not only injure himself but somebody else as well. I will go and get a calming draught for him and you, you do your duty as a tutor, young man!"

If he had any strength Harry would have laughed at the stern tone of voice, like a mother repenting a child. Snape bristled, annoyed but Harry was glad that he had managed to push himself back up into a sitting position and even if that strenuous effort was making him pant, he couldn't really care.

He roughly blinked back tears; he wasn't going to cry again, no, he wasn't going to give that satisfaction to the git as he saw Madam Pomfrey walk away to her office. He sighed and ran a hand over his face. His eyes were burning and all he wanted to do was to bury face in his pillow and sleep for the rest of the summer and to forget everything and only wake up when it didn't hurt so much…that he could forget…

Hands on his biceps made Harry struggle out of habit and instinct. He heard a low sigh above him and then Snape said curtly. "Potter, some cooperation is required if you can find it in yourself to manage it."

Harry glanced up, his green eyes narrowed and his glasses smudged and then Snape sighed again as he growled. "Look at you, boy. You are a mess. Tears and mucus all over your face. If only the Wizarding population could see you now."

"I am sure that you would just love to snap a picture, wouldn't you?" Harry bowed his head as he searched in his pocket for a handkerchief, of course he wasn't carrying one, and he never did. He glanced up as a white one was held out to him.

He accepted it, crumbling the white fabric in his hand before he quickly lifted his glasses off his nose and scrubbed at his face, cheeks burning with a mixture of rage and shame. Why did it have to be Snape of all people to see him like this?

Why did Snape have to be his tutor? Why couldn't it be anybody else? Anybody who actually liked him. When Snape had been in the St. Mungo's it had seemed too natural to plead his case in front of the Wizengamot but now…Harry had quite forgotten how hateful and nasty Snape could be.

"Alright, Potter, let's try this again." His Professor's soft voice and Harry tucked the handkerchief away, seeing the slender hand that was held out to him. For a moment he considered accepting and pulling Snape to the ground, let's see if the older wizard found it so easily to rise but the moment the thought rose in his mind he banished it with a weary sigh.

He placed his own hand in Snape's, feeling the dry and warm fingers curl with a surprising firm but gentle grip around his wrist as Snape instructed. "Push yourself off the ground the moment I pull. On the count of three…" Harry braced himself, aware of Snape's count of three.

"One…two….three…." Soon Harry stood saying on his feet, dizziness making his head spin. The room was spinning in wild colors and Harry could feel his knees weakening, buckling underneath him and with a low moan as small specks of black drifted across his vision, he could feel them giving out from underneath him again.

An arm around his waist caught him in time and Harry's head came to rest on a strong chest. Snape seemed to stagger under Harry's weight but then Snape righted himself as he pulled Harry closer to try and find the right balance.

After a moment Snape managed to stand with Harry crawled awkwardly against his chest, one arm supporting the younger male's weight and Harry tried to lift his head. The room spun even worse and he could feel his stomach rebelling the moment he tried to support his own weight.

Snape's body was tense, coiled as if he was waiting for something. The wounded wizard was trembling a little but the arm holding Harry was strong and steady. Harry tried to get his feet back underneath him but he felt so tired and every time he tried, his head spun even more.

His heart throbbed and he felt weak, like he had been ill for a long time and had walked up to the Gryffindor Tower from the Entrance Hall. He wanted to stand on his own legs, not in the least bit to be afraid that Snape might drop him because the other wizard was in the least recovered.

Snape's arm tightened and then pulled Harry a little bit closer as Snape asked, Harry feeling the voice rumbling through the chest where his head was resting against. "Can you stand?"

Harry tried to lift his head again as he slowly eased his weight on one foot. He held his breath, aware that Snape had loosened his hold, something which Harry felt with a pang. He squashed that notion rudely and brutally, this wasn't the time.

The moment he put the weight on his legs, they buckled again and Harry nearly fell again. Pain shot through his head and for a moment everything faded to black as he fainted…

Hp

Severus barely had the time to use his arms to catch Potter as the younger wizard's eyes rolled up into his head. The already pale face was grey with exhaustion and Severus swore softly under his breath as he pillowed the messy head against his shoulder.

Potter's soft breathing was fanning his neck and making him shiver but Severus ignored it. The brat's emerald green eyes were unfocussed and after a moment, considering Potter's unnatural stance and the fact that the brat was rather heavy, no matter how small he might be, Severus' other arm easily slid underneath the younger wizard's knees.

In a moment Severus faced another problem, now he had managed to get Potter off his feet but the brat was waking up, moaning softly as his eyes slid closed and they moved restlessly. Severus found himself staring down in the exhausted looking face, seeing Potter for the first time perhaps.

He had always watched Potter, for years he had seen the boy in various stages, angry, sad, indifferent, stern, excited but never happy. He had seen the defeated look Potter had worn when Diggory had died and the tears Potter couldn't cry, not even for Black, like he didn't know how.

But now, to see the parted mouth that revealed the perfect white teeth and the wrinkles that had smoothed out, making Potter look so young. Had the boy ever look as innocent to Severus as he did now? No, never, even when Potter had been a first year and Severus had seen him for the first time he had often imagined to see a look of mischief in the green eyes…

But he had often seen the anger which in time had grown into hate. Things could have gone different, he knew, if only he had threaded Potter different the first time he saw the boy…

The green eyes opened as they stared up into Severus' dark ones. Severus couldn't look away. He could see the weariness and the hurt as Potter struggled to mask the feelings. Severus was silent but he knew that Lily's eyes had never appeared like that.

They had condemned him, yes, they had expressed anger and happiness but Potter's eyes had always been hooded. Never once had Severus seen the true happiness he associated with love, the knowing spark that told the world you were in love and didn't care who saw it. Even with the Weasley girl, Potter had still looked haunted and now…

Now that Potter was free, the eyes that stared into his own were old, world weary, like somebody who has seen too much sorrow and grief, too much violence and anger, too much dark things to believe in a light world. It made Severus ache deep inside.

He could understand those feelings all too well, it had been what had caused his bitter personality. He had seen too much grief himself, had brought it on…

Had that been what Minerva meant? That he could help Potter, to allow the boy not to become another Severus Snape? Another bitter man who nursed his deep wounds in private, away from prying eyes, only wishing for arms to hold him.

But those arms never came and in the end he had to make due on memories but in the dark of the night, even those weren't enough. In the end he merely snapped more at those that cared for him as he walked a constantly thinning thread between Dumbledore and the Dark Lord. But even in the last few months, not even his memories were comfort enough…

No, in those last months, he had looked forward to the end, to whatever end it would be. But he had been given another change even if he didn't know exactly what it meant for him…

Potter's eyes were still locking with his own, like the boy was daring Severus to drop him. But strangely enough, that was an idea that never once crossed Severus' mind. No instead the Slytherin drew the smaller wizard closer by tightening his grip and something in Potter eased, some weariness eased and he relaxed, body still taunt against Severus' body and then to Severus' utter amazement, Potter's head dropped back against his shoulder as Potter's eyes dropped closed.

_I will be damned…_

Hp

Madam Pomfrey returned to find a staring Potions Master with the sleeping savor of the wizarding world in his arms. Severus seemed unsure and with a careful touch on the black clad arm, Madam Pomfrey directed Severus to the bed.

With care that he normally only displayed when he carried his beloved potions into the room, Severus maneuvered Harry Potter to the bed and laid him down, careful to lay Potter's messy head down on the pillow. Immediately the younger wizard released a low hiss and then curled up on his side, knees drawn up to his chest as he shivered, biting his lips as his eyes moved restless.

Severus looked on as Potter curled up. Madam Pomfrey bustled about the bed, waving her wand as she pulled the blanket over the smaller wizard. The male wizard was unsure as the mediwitch sat the potions vials she had been carrying on the bedside table and after a moment he asked, seeing Potter's face tighten as if in fright or worry. "Why don't you wake him?"

The stern witch glanced up before her eyes dropped back to Potter's face. She caressed her cheek with a gentle touch that Severus himself had felt when he had been brought to the Hospital Wing and had been tense and wounded, ready to snap at somebody.

"He is exhausted, Severus. He will wake up in a little while on his own when he is rested."

"But he is having a nightmare." Something inside the deep voice was questioning as if Severus was genuinely puzzled to why nobody was waking the younger wizard.

"I don't think he will appreciate it, Severus. Harry needs his rest and he was never one to be pitied and comforted, quite like somebody else I know." The Potions Master scowled heavily at her but she merely smiled gently at him.

"Let him rest, Severus, he needs it. Come; let me see how you are doing now that you are here." Poppy merely placed a hand on his shoulder as she tried to steer him away. But Severus refused to budge.

"But Potter is having a nightmare." Severus clarified.

Poppy sighed and said with a sad look. "I know. He doesn't like it when I wake him. He startles as if he is afraid I will strike him. It is like he doesn't know what to do with himself. It is best to allow him to come out of it himself."

And as he was led away, puzzled with Potter's behavior, Severus vowed to wake Potter up if the nightmare persisted or got worse.

Hp

It didn't take Severus long to limp back to the bedside. He kept telling himself it was because that if he had a duty to make sure the brat was alright, he had a right to check up on Potter, not for some melodramatic reason of actually caring for the brat. Why should he care if Potter had a nightmare or cried himself hoarse because of it?

But there was something going on. Why would anybody flinch away when you woke them from a nightmare? Those revelations were too close for comfort as Severus flickered his wand at a chair that stood on the other end of the infirmary and Summoning it to him.

The chair stood firmly in place where Potter was sleeping. In the time Severus had been gone the younger male had kicked the blankets away and was lying shivering in his bed, arms pulled around his knees.

Potter's face was drawn tight and as Severus sat himself down, he wondered what Potter was dreaming. Potter's mouth opened but no sound came out, other than a hoarse cry. Potter shook his head, through no other sound was forthcoming.

Severus frowned and then carefully, he did really wonder if his assumptions were correct, he laid a light hand on Potter's tense arm. "Potter, wake up!"

Potter tensed but the child didn't resist as he struggled to awake. Severus could see it in the tightening lines of his face and he shook Potter lightly. "Come on, boy, wake up."

At that hoarse cry Potter tensed even further and then the green eyes opened as Potter said, obviously sleeping and confused, shaking Severus' hand off. "I am awake, uncle Vernon."

_Vernon? _Had he heard correctly? Did this blasted Gryffindor just called him by the name of his uncle?

Biting back the angry rage that was making his tongue twitch with a shout, he hissed. _"What did you call me?"_

Potter flinched and the green eyes opened wide, startling awake in an instance as Potter shot up in the bed and backed away from the edge, nearly throwing himself off the other edge. Potter fumbled for words, confusion shining in his face as Potter struggled to put the mask into place.

"I called you by the name of my uncle, sir." The messy head bowed and Severus frowned.

"You are accustomed to waking up with your uncle then?"

Potter's head shot up and Severus could see the hurt blossom in the dark green eyes just as the anger clouded before disgust and resentment clouded the green eyes. Potter's lips were set in a firm line and then the Gryffindor said. "No!"

"Then why would you think I was your uncle?"

Potter shuddered. "Habit."

_Habit? The only times that flinching away from somebody is a habit if something happened to cause the flinching._

"Now either way that habit can be that you are indeed, as I have said, accustomed to waking up with your uncle or your uncle wakes you. So which one is it?"

"What's it to you?" Potter snarled, more defensive than anything else.

"Well, seeing as you see it fit to call me uncle, I think it is appropriate that you explain your actions. Most people do not call me a different name when I wake them from a nightmare." Severus forced his voice to be patient. It wouldn't do him any good if he snapped like he wanted to. He kept his temper under a tight leash.

"Oh, you wake many people from a nightmare then?" Potter's voice was filled with a kind of bitter longing and Severus frowned as he clarified.

"The Slytherin children of course. Somebody has to wake them…"

Potter turned his head away and he blinked roughly. To Severus' eyes it seemed like he was blinking back tears. Despite himself Severus was curious as he leaned forward and asked. "How did your uncle wake you?"

"By banging on the door or throwing things at me." Potter whispered after a moment. The brat's face was still turned away and for a moment the younger wizard seemed to venerable and broken that Severus' breathing hitched in his throat. Never before had the boy looked so young to him. Potter continued to sit there, coiled and turned in on himself.

Severus wanted nothing more than to reach out to Potter, to smooth the weary lines from the boy's forehead. An instinct older them time was taking hold of him, to hold Potter and to ease the young one's suffering. He ruthlessly banished that, even as his heart beat a little bit faster because of it.

Potter would never welcome it. Everything in the younger wizard's body languish told him so. Severus' hands plucked the vial of Dreamless Sleep from his robe and wordless he extended it towards Potter.

The brat looked up at him, blinking slowly like he didn't understand. For a moment Severus felt a pang of rage. _Damn the brat for paying so little attention in class!_ Aloud he sneered. "It is Dreamless Sleep, Potter; even _you _should be familiar with that potion."

Potter flushed but then much to Severus' amazement he accepted the potion and uncorked it. There was an expression of gratitude upon the younger wizard's face that made Severus sneer. He looked away at once, fuming silently.

It didn't feel right that Potter was grateful for the potions Severus gave him. Let the brat wear that expression with somebody else but not with him! He was the big evil Slytherin, not a soppy Potions Master…

Despite himself Severus watched as Potter yawned and rubbed at his eyes, upsetting his glasses as Potter struggled to remain awake. He rose, sneering at himself as he pulled the blankets away, forcefully tugging them out from underneath Potter. The brat startled and woke up enough to glare at Severus before the messy head hit the pillow, Potter struggling to remain awake.

Cursing himself for being an sentimental fool, not even his Slytherins hadn't gotten this treatment out of him, unless they were really ill, Severus pulled the blankets over the sleeping form of the Hero of the Wizarding World, sitting down upon the chair he had occupied earlier, wondering about the past of said hero, knowing that somehow Potter wasn't the one Severus had thought he had been.

Hp

"How is he doing?" Harry eased his way back to wakefulness, feeling fuzzy because of the potion. He stayed there, cocooned in the warm darkness as he snuggled back into the soft pillows underneath him, feel secured.

"He will be fine, eventually but I would caution him not to use any magic…" Madam Pomfrey's voice was soft as she spoke to the Headmistress.

"What would you recommend then?"

"That he stays here. He will need time to recuperate and he must likely will need aid doing so…"

"I will speak to them both when they wake up but I think I know just the person to aid Harry with this." The soft laughter send something inside Harry fluttering but as darkness claimed him once more, he was unsure of what it would mean.

**That is it for now. I have at the moment not much inspiration because I am ill and can't really be bothered truth be told. I am just glad that I managed to finish the chapter and I do hope that you liked it. Review of course and send some ideas. **

**The next chapter: The next morning Harry finds out the Headmistress' plan but will he like it? What is more, will Severus be able to cope with having Harry at Hogwarts and perhaps see the savior more times then he would care to? That and more in: Solutions**


	6. Solutions

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: ****Thank you all so much for the reviews. I am glad that everybody enjoys the story so much and all the compliments are sure making me blush a lot. But I have bored you enough with my chatter, let's begin. I think Snape, after last chapter kind of had a change of heart on how to approach Harry.**

Harry glanced around the deserted Infirmary as he chewed on his toast. He was chewing without a thought as the food tasted like sawdust in his mouth. He would have loved to spit it out and push the plate away but Madam Pomfrey's threat kept him eating.

Luckily she had retreated to her office to give him some much needed time alone. Ever since he had woken this morning from his potions induce slumber and she had told him briskly that the Headmistress wished to see him, Harry's stomach had been uncomfortably tight.

He hoped it included the words 'you are free to leave' for he found that he wanted nothing more than to return to Grimbauld Place, surely by now Hermione must be worried where he was or not, she might not even miss him because she had been very busy with Ron….

Harry sighed and stared down at his half eaten toast. He wasn't hungry. He would take the lecture as he pushed his plate away, leaning over to place it on the bedside table. He placed his hands on his blanket covered legs, glancing around the empty Infirmary. No books or any other way for him to entertain himself except to think and Harry didn't want to think.

He sighed and glanced at the windows longingly. Sunlight was filtering into the room and Harry wanted to go outside. He should have brought his Invisibility Cloak but he knew that tripping down the stairs was not the best way to sneak around.

Two years of nightmares and night time wanderings around the castle had taught him that much. He looked at the floor to count the stones, anything to keep his mind from turning to memories of the hours after the Final Battle. He could clearly remember the sounds and the chaos that had erupted as they struggled to heal those who had been wounded, sending the ones who could travel to St. Mungo's and treating those who were too severely injured to travel into the Hospital Wing.

He closed his eyes tightly and they opened when he heard the double doors being pushed open. His eyes grew wide and his hand curled around his wand. Snape entered the Infirmary, closing the doors behind him.

The Potions Master faltered in his step as he noticed Harry was awake and the dark eyes widen slightly. Harry's eyes narrowed as he took in Snape's appearance. Harry knew Snape was a wizard who did not care for his appearance but now the older wizard looked ready to fall over.

His tutor looked like he hadn't slept all night and by the slight twitch of Snape's right hand and his stiff stance, Harry knew without a doubt that Snape was in pain or in the least bit uncomfortable. Snape limped closer and Harry was surprised to see Snape held a book.

"What happened to you?" He blurted out just as Snape pulled a chair closer. The dark head snapped up and Snape's eyes narrowed as the other wizard asked.

"What do you mean?"

Snape's voice was hoarser then it ever had been before but the tone was surprise and weariness as Harry felt like stuffing his whole foot in his mouth. What had he been thinking but then he just decided to throw all caution to the wind as he glanced back at Snape and said boldly. "You look like you haven't slept at all and like you are in pain."

The older wizard huffed as he said. "Well, anybody in my state would look like that after spending half a night napping on a chair beside the bedside of a student only to be send to be dismissed by your employee when you fall from said chair and then to find out that your rooms are still in the dungeons and well, to walk up those stairs is not a walk in the park after being bitten by a snake nearly twice your size."

Snape sighed, his voice breaking and he wordlessly Summoned a glass of water to take a sip. Harry's mind was buzzing; Snape had sat by his bedside? Nobody had ever done such a thing for him. He turned to look away, his eyes burning a little.

Something landed on his leg and he looked down to see a book lying on top of the blanket. He glanced back at Snape to see the smirk twisting the thin lips as he pointed at the book. "See I brought you something to read. Might as well use this 'mending time' for something halfway decent so you can study up on your Potions if you think that you want to make it into NEWT Potions."

Harry looked back down at the book to read the title. _Most Potente Potions_ was the same book that they had used in their second year to brew the Polyjuice Potion. It had been in the restricted section of the library and he wondered why Snape would give it to him.

This book looked newer than the other one anyway and as he cast an inquiring glance at Snape who had crossed his arms over his chest and was smirking nastily, said. "I think that it would be very bad for my credentials if I failed the Great Harry Potter!"

Rage fueled through Harry so quickly that he had to breathe in deeply to force himself to be calm as he said with clenched teeth. "I don't want any special treatment."

"You won't get any!" Snape snarled and Harry looked over at Snape who looked away before he said. "I brought you the book because, despite everything that has happened between us, I am your tutor and that means that you are my responsibility. Now before you go shouting about how much you are a victim here, let me finish! You are an adult, true but you are also a student who has seen too many things that no child should ever have to see. You might know everything there is to know about Defense Against the Dark Arts, which we will cover in our lessons this year, but I am foremost a Potions Master and since you do want to be an auror and you need potions for that, you will be studying under me combined with the Potions lessons you take with the rest of your classmates. However you will find that studying under me is very different from being in class, Potter."

Harry gave a nod as he asked. "Can we cover some of the potions from other years as well? It might put me at an advantage in class…"

"We will begin at the start of the syllabus and work our way from there, Mr. Potter. You will find that I do not tolerate laziness and since you proved that you can follow instructions quite easily, you will come to my office thrice a week for potions. We will go over the theory one night and brew the other two. I am more than certain that you can work if you are not distracted by friends."

This was accompanied by a slight sneer but Harry ignored it as he asked, feeling self conscious. He was reminded of how much he didn't know about Snape. "How good of a Potions Master are you? I mean, I know that there aren't many Potions Masters in Europe who are licensed to brew the Wolf's Bane Potion and well, it would be strange that you only taught here without taking any apprentices."

Snape looked at him, tracing his lower lip with one slender finger before he said. "My…past and debt to Albus made it impossible for me to teach anywhere else, which I am sure you know, having viewed my memories." Snape cocked his head to the side and continued. "….on the other hand, I do not have the time to fully train an apprentice. A Potions apprenticeship takes two full years to complete with a Potions Master but even then there are five years more to go to achieve the Potions Master level I am at. You need to serve several apprenticeships with different masters or mistress, though your first master or mistress would be your coach so to speak. While most students do aspire such an opportunity, I do not have the time to give the apprentice the necessary time they deserve."

"And they couldn't have served a later apprenticeship with you?" Harry was genuinely interested now. Snape seemed to enjoy the subject and he even forgot the sneers as he answered.

"They could have but it would not be appropriate. A master and his apprentice have a close bond since they share close living quarters as well as a profession to fully prepare the students. It is not uncommon for masters and mistress to end up married or in a relationship after they serve an apprenticeship together. As a Professor at this school it would be most unwise, especially with my past, though that does not change that I am one of the most sought after Potions Masters in Britain."

Snape smirked at Harry as he continued on a light tone. "You are very fortunate to have me as your tutor. Most would do anything for the change."

Harry was still silent and Snape's expression changed as he leaned forward with some difficulty and tapped the book with a slender finger. "Read the book, I expect you to pass the test I have prepared for you when you take your first lesson with me. I want to know what mess I need to pick up to get you ready and at the level I want you at."

Snape rose and Harry softly said. "Do you want some tea? It might not be wise to let you walk back to the dungeons yet and besides, I want to know more about the potions, it is interesting. Thank you by the way for the book and the opportunity. I do appreciate it."

A surprised expression crossed Snape's face but he did lower himself into the chair slowly as he gave a nod and said. "Very well, what do you want to know? And besides, Potter, somebody has to make sure that you excel in something else besides getting your head in the line of fire."

Despite himself Harry chuckled darkly. "Yes, it might go wrong someday and my handsome features will be ruined."

"Yes, ruined indeed," Snape murmured as he gave Harry a long intense look before he looked away and repeated. "What do you want to know?"

"Why don't many people aspire to be Potions Masters?" He pulled the book closer to him.

"Because like I said in the speech I gave you in your first year, most do not appreciate the beauty of a simmering cauldron or have the patience that is necessary to brew a correct potion. It is not just about tossing ingredients in but they have to be put in an order and every step of a potion is like a dance, it needs to be followed correctly and with feeling because or indifference will ruin the potion. It takes years of study and it takes a lot of diligence and some talent to make it as a potions Master. I can teach you all the potions in the world but unless you have talent for it and feeling then you will never make a fine Potions Master. That is why it is so rare for Potions Masters or Mistresses to make it to their master levels. It requires work and since the lack of magic that is used in almost every other profession, it does tend to put people off."

"So it is because they don't like potions that they don't go ahead and try to achieve mastery?"

"Mmm, yes, most of the students think that Potions is not important because there are no spells and wand waving involved. They are glad to drop out after their OWLs."

"Is that why you have such high standards for your NEWT class?" Harry tried to keep the accusation out of his voice and he was pleased that he managed to succeed.

Snape sighed and shifted in his seat before he answered. "Yes and no. I wanted the best in my class and to have students who were interested in Potions and not just seeking for an easy NEWT. Potions is not easy and there is no playing around a cauldron. There is a small difference between a potion and a poison."

"What can your students achieve once they have achieved their NEWT in Potions?"

"They are the best in the field without serving an apprenticeship with a master. Some do go on to become Mistresses or Masters while other students go on to a different profession. My students are the best in the field and some are even more advanced than some apprentices. The Potions course at Hogwarts is one of the best in the magical world and I am the only Potions Master who teaches."

"But Slughorn is a master too, isn't he?" Harry frowned. During Snape's comment about his students, Harry realized Snape felt proud of what he had achieved and while Snape's teaching methods left something to be desired, the man demanded the best of his students and those who did not make the cut were ruthlessly squashed into the ground, not even to be accepted into Potions.

"He is." Snape gave a nod but by the curt tone Harry could tell that Snape was struggling to contain the sneer. He summoned a House Elf, requesting tea which appeared a moment later on the small bedside table. Harry gestured with his hand for Snape to pour himself a cup and waited for Snape to continue.

"Professor Slughorn is not of the same rank as I am."

"How does that work?" Harry waited as Snape took a sip before Snape answered.

"There are different mastery levels that you can achieve in Potions. I am a Master rank 8 and Professor Slughorn is Master rank 6. As a Potions Master or Mistress you are registered at the Guild and they award the ranks and register all potions created by Potions Masters, so that nobody can steal any potions or create potions that are too advance for their level. How many apprenticeships you serve and with who is very important to the rank you can achieve."

Harry poured himself some tea and Snape said. "I served two years of apprenticeship in Britain with a master and then two years abroad in Europe with a different master before I came back to teach at Hogwarts. I continued my study under Slughorn's tutorage for a year. While I taught at Hogwarts after Slughorn left for his retirement I studied under an Italian Master with whom I met during the school holidays and who allowed me to do my own research and send it to him by owl. After three years I was recognized at this rank."

Harry understood the message behind the words. The things Snape was not saying. How hard it had been to go on after Lily's death and how he had struggled with Voldemort's dominance when he became a Death Eater. Harry wondered, had Snape served abroad to escape from Voldemort? He wanted to ask but he did not dare.

Silence fell between them as they both took a sip of their tea. Harry was amazed that Snape and he had managed to have a civilized conversation between them without shouting at each other. He glanced up when Madam Pomfrey approached the bed and said, smiling at Snape though she looked stern.

"Here again, Severus! I thought I told you to get some sleep, young man. It is good to see that you have at least managed to get a shower like I told you and Mr. Potter, you really need to eat more."

"I am not hungry," He protested until much to his surprise and utter amazement Snape cut in.

"That would be my fault, Poppy. I kept Mr. Potter from his breakfast. I brought him a book to study."

"Mr. Potter is not fit to study, Severus…."

"I quite agree with you, Poppy but we got to talking about Potions Masters before you so rudely interrupted us." The slight sneer and smirk reminded Harry and Madam Pomfrey rolled her eyes.

"Yes, well, that is beside the point. If you are feeling up for it, dear, Professor McGonagall wishes to speak to you. I shall call her over." Harry could only nod as he sat up a bit straighter. His tea cup balanced dangerously in his hand as a wave of dizziness hit him.

He tried to mask it though he knew his skin was paling. Snape's dark eyes were watching him but the Potions Master made no comment. They were taking stock of his face and Harry could feel his own glare hardening but Snape merely took a sip of his tea.

"Ah, Harry, awake I see? How are you feeling?" The Headmistress approached the bed with brisk steps and Harry put his tea cup down, his hand trembling a little as he rested back against the pillows. They did not need to know how he truly felt as he softly said.

"I am feeling alright, Professor."

"Good, good, Poppy informed me that you have not recovered yet. I do believe it is best that you remain here for a while…."

"Really, Professor, I am fine. I am sure that if Madam Pomfrey gives me a list of instructions then I can return home. I am sure that Hermione will help me."

"That may be very well but Miss Granger is recovering as well and you are in no fit state to return home." Madam Pomfrey broke in and Harry felt his anger rise to the surface again as he bit out.

"I am more than qualified to take care of myself and…."

"Potter, nobody is doubting that." Snape broke in, his voice soft and Harry turned to him fuming but the older wizard held out a slender hand and snapped. "Let me finish! Magical depletion is a very serious illness for a magical person, Potter. You cannot use any magic and those who cast spells to aid you must be very careful because your magic could respond badly to it. It is for your own safety and that of Miss Granger to wait until you have recovered a little. Madam Pomfrey is well equipped to handle anything that comes her way and…."

"Actually, Severus, Poppy will not be the main caretaker of Harry." Professor McGonagall looked guilty and Harry knew he wasn't going to like the next words.

Hp

"Then who is?" Severus bit out through clenched teeth. Blast the old cat and her Gryffindors manipulative ways! Minerva looked at him and by the look she gave him, Severus got to his feet unsteadily as he hissed. "_Oh no! Do not even think about it!"_

Potter looked around and Minerva softly said. "Now, Severus…"

"_No_, Minerva! You have spent too much time with that dratted portrait if you think that you can manipulate me into this! I am his tutor, not his caretaker."

This time the look of shocked outrage on Potter's face was one of similarity to how Severus felt but he refused to back down. He would be damned if he was going to take care of precious baby Potter!

"I did not say anything about being Harry's caretaker, Severus. I meant more that Harry can stay at the castle and since you are here as well, why doesn't he start his lessons with you?"

"And how had you envisioned that?" Severus snarled.

"You said that you always wanted an apprentice, did you not?"

"That is beside the point, Minerva and you know…." Bitterness welled up within him. Severus would never secure an apprentice, even if he was the most sought after Potions Master in the world, he was still the murder of Albus Dumbledore and there were just some things that nobody ever forgot.

Minerva smiled at him and approached him as she softly said so that he was the only one who heard her. "Severus, I do not mean anything with it, really I don't. I owe you an apology and I am in your debt for everything that you have done for us. I want what is best for you, young man, I really do and I know that it has always been your wish to secure a student who was passionate about Potions. That is the one thing you could never have and I wish to change that. I know that the chances of securing a good apprentice are slim now but why don't you allow Harry the chance? He is a hard worker and I am sure that under your wing he can achieve great things."

"Potter will not be a poster boy to be served under me and to show all the other students that I am not that big of a fiend!" He snarled, more insulted than anything else.

"And it isn't meant that way." She soothed immediately. She cast a look at Potter who was trying his hardest not to stare at them and as her hand touched his shoulder to lead him away, she added once they were out of hearing distance.

"Severus, listen. I need for you to be there for Harry in a way that is entirely appropriate for any student teacher relationship. _Oh not like that, you wicked man!_ No, I mean that Harry has to be able to trust you and that perchance, a friendship can form between the both of you. The only way for us to achieve the amount of time that Harry needs to spend with you without raising questions is if we make him your apprentice. This way, you can get your apprentice and hopefully Harry will learn that he can trust you. You will both benefit from this."

"But it is Potter!"

"Yes, well, I suppose you will simply have to overlook that fact." This time her voice was stern, as stern as it always was when they were discussing his grudge for James Potter and cohorts. He pinched the bridge of his nose.

Would it be worth it? Potter was far below the level Severus used even contemplated offering a student an apprenticeship but it might just work….

"Fine, I'll do it." He gave a nod.

"Excellent! Thank you, Severus…" She beamed at him, all traces of tiredness gone.

"Oh, but Minerva, I do want a set of new cauldrons and new ingredients." Her expression changed as he smirked and finally she gave a nod and a sigh. Severus fought his grin.

Hp

Harry tried his best to hide his curiosity when Snape and Professor McGonagall came back. Snape crossed his arms over his chest and he looked like he always did, bored and menacing. He wondered what he had been discussing. He had heard something about apprentices but he shook his head, no matter how much interest he had expressed a while ago, nobody would ever consider him. They would most likely mean somebody else like Malfoy or….

"I don't want to stay here, Professor." He answered immediately.

He had thought long and hard about it and while Snape probably would think that it was a thing of pride and accuse him of behaving like his dad, it was just…it was this place, the memories. It was hard enough to be back at Hogwarts now and Harry knew that if he stayed here any longer and without the distraction of classes, friends and other people, well the memories would continue to press up against him and….

"Mr. Potter, have you missed the explanation I just offered on your safety and Miss Granger's safety…." Snape began as Harry cut in.

"I heard it! I am not deaf!" He was annoyed and his anger which had been so close to the surface rose again and got the better of him. He could hear Madam Pomfrey's comments that she gave underneath her breath but he refused to look at her.

His green eyes rose up to meet the dark ones which were glittering oddly. Normally Snape would have snapped right back at him but this time the Potions Master crossed his arms over his chest and leaned forward to whisper. "Good, I do expect that my apprentice has most excellent hearing. The smallest sound can be an indication that a potion is about to enter the next stage of brewing."

Harry frowned, what was going on? He looked from one teacher to the other. Both looked back at him equally impassive and he wondered who was going to crack first. Professor McGonagall merely raised an eyebrow and Harry knew that he would not get anything out of his former Head of House so he turned to Snape as he asked.

"But you will teach Defense against the Dark Arts this year, won't you?"

Snape inclined his head as he answered. "Yes, I do teach the Defense against the Dark Arts but I am also a Potions Master. I believe that we had this conversation a while ago but if you wish to repeat it, we established that I am a Potions Master, Potter and you showed a keen interest in learning more."

"But you don't take any apprentices because they don't make the cut. I don't make the cut, I know I will never meet your expectations because you have repeatedly told me so during the past 6 years." Harry said bitterly. What was Snape getting at?

The wizard in question looked at Professor McGonagall and Harry followed his gaze. The Headmistress had crossed her arms as well and said. "Since Professor Snape started teaching Potions the Potions curriculum at Hogwarts has been one of the best at Hogwarts. But because of last year, I do think it is best if he takes up his other field of expertise. Too many students have suffered last year for a nobody who doesn't know anything about this subject to teach it. The students deserve better."

Harry gave a nod and Professor McGonagall continued. "Besides, I cannot send Horace away after everything he has done."

"That said we are back where we started. I will be assisting Professor Slughorn and I do think that the time is right to stop all the blabbering and ask of Potter what has been asked of me. So listen up, Potter." Harry bristled at Snape's tone but something in it changed and he sat up straighter, looking the other dark wizard in the eye.

"I cannot offer you a full Potions apprenticeship, Potter, not an official Ministry registered one anyway. I can however, offer you one that is older and that is recognized all over the world by the Potions Masters Guild, if you want it of course."

"What would one entitle and what is the difference between the two?" Harry said in the same business like tone.

"With a Ministry apprenticeship the apprentice would aid with classes and take exams at the Ministry for Magic and use a Ministry approved apprenticeship rules. However, with a guild apprenticeship, you will not be sharing classes since I cannot offer you that but you will brew by my side and under my tutorage and you will be an apprentice in every sense except officially as recognized by the Ministry. This would not aid you in becoming a Potions Master in the eyes of the Ministry but I will offer you the correct apprenticeship with all the correct apprenticeship forms."

Harry frowned as he asked. "And what would that mean for me?"

He was interested, he couldn't deny that and Snape pulled the chair he had been sitting on earlier closer as he sat down. The Potions Master looked tired as he began to explain. "You will sign the apprenticeship document which states that I will be your master until the period of a year has passed or until we see it fit to break that bond. I will be responsible to teach you anything I deem fit which has been finalized in a document. You will treat me with respect that I deserve as a master of my field. I will be responsible for your housing, safety and to see that you are well taken care of in all manner of things but especially that you will be taught Potions under my wing. You will obey me without question with regards to Potions."

"I don't understand." Harry cocked his head to the side. It was a lot to take in and Snape smiled at him, not a nasty smile but a tired one as he said.

"I will be your coach, Potter and your master and you will be my apprentice with everything that includes. I am sure that Minerva can owl the guild for the correct documents. You will be required to read those before signing anything but it will explain everything."

Harry sat up straighter and for a moment he didn't notice the room spinning as he focused on Snape and asked. "And we will be sharing the same close relationship that you explained earlier, sir?"

Snape gave a nod and then asked his voice strangely formal and Harry could feel the deep magic in the room swirling between him and Snape. "I, Severus Snape, Potions Master rank 8, formally ask of you, Harry Potter, student at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, if you will become my apprentice to follow the rules as stated by the Potions Masters Guild since 1535 and recognized and followed all over the world by Potions Masters and Mistresses?"

Taking a deep breath, Harry took a moment to think. He needed to weight his options here because of what he knew, what they would be engaging in, would determine the course of the next school year. He could feel the magic that was swirling and he knew it was binding.

Could it really be so bad? Snape was already his tutor and it would only be a small adjustment to become Snape's apprentice and plus, well, it might be good, like Snape had said, to learn something different than what he had been doing all his life.

It was only a year but on the other hand, it was Snape. Harry hated Snape as much as he hated Voldemort but could he change that? This could be the chance of a lifetime. A chance he might never get again and besides, they could always end the apprenticeship if things weren't working out.

It was just that it was the close bond between master and apprentice that bothered him. Could he really overcome his hate for the man standing before him? He looked back up at Snape to see that the Potions Master had risen to his full height, arms crossed over his chest and staring down at Harry down his hooked nose.

The grayish tint of his skin worried Harry and that surprised him. He looked down at the blankets to think of the night so many months ago when he had saved Snape. Nobody had ever looked out for the Potions Master and Harry wondered if that was part of the contract too. A part of him wondered if they could really form a friendship, it was a risk but Harry wasn't a Gryffindor for nothing.

He lifted his head and he said. "I, Harry Potter, student at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, accept the apprenticeship proposed by Severus Snape, Potions Master rank 8 to become my mentor, teacher and master in the art of Potions."

With a low snap the magic attached itself to Harry, making him breathe deeply and tired. Snape appeared to stagger and with a light touch at the elbow, Professor McGonagall guided him down to sit.

"Good, now that that is settled I am sure that Minerva can go secure those papers to be signed at the earliest convenience and Severus can go and lay down for a nap before he faints, I will gladly send you all away so that finally Mr. Potter can get some rest!" And with a glare that had managed to put many unruly students over the years to bed and had silenced many of the most formidable witches and wizards during her time as a mediwitch, Poppy Pomfrey managed once again to make her infirmary peaceful, even as Harry chuckled softly and opened his book, as Snape's apprentice he had to make a good impression and that started with lots of studying as he did just that, trying his hardest not to think of memories that tried to rise to the surface.

**So that is it. I will draw up the Apprentice document in the next chapter, far too lazy right now. ****So yeah review and tell me what you think of the latest thing that has happened. We will be starting the school year soon, I promise. **

**Next chapter: Harry is released to Gryffindor Tower instead of the infirmary but can our brave hero deal with the memories that threaten to overwhelm him or will be look forward to being alone? How will Severus feel about sharing his trade and passion with a Potter? And as they are called to the Headmistress to finalize the document, will they, once they realize what it means, back down or continue? That and more in: changes. **


	7. Changes

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter and the draft from the apprentice document has come from a different fic so I don't own that either. **

**Note: Thank you all for the reviews. I know that at the moment I am bit late with updating but I have had a heck of a month so real life caught up with me in the form of a three day field trip with school and no access to a computer. Anyway let's begin. **** I believe that we are all familiar with the saying: Blood sign you, kiss to bind you? Well if not, it applies here. I changed it a little and Harry will be going to Gryffindor Tower later instead of what I said in the chapter before. **

_At the date of the __fourteenth of August in the year 1998 at Hogwarts School For Witchcraft and Wizardry this document will seal the Apprentice Bond between seventh year student Harry James Potter who seeks to apprentice himself to Severus Tobias Snape, Master of Potions eight rank as recognized by the Guild for Mastery of Potions in Europe since 963, by the consent of Headmistress Minerva McGonagall, for the duration of one year or until both parties have agreed to sever the Apprentice Bond or to lengthen the duration. _

_During this time the apprentice may not sign himself into another other form of apprentice, bonding, engagement or matrimony except without the consent of his master. The apprentice shall dwell with his master to learn the craft and obey him in word, thought and deed__ as deemed appropriate by his master. No hurt or damage may be done by the apprentice to the master, the master's properties and the goods of his master he may not lend or waste them without the master's license or consent. The apprentice shall keep the secrets of his master and learn by his hand the craft and lore, the magick and mystery and at all times shall the apprentice fulfill the duties the master request or refrain from doing. _

_The master must solemn vow that he will teach, show, instruct and inform his apprentice, to the best of his abilities, his lore and craft, magick and mystery so that the apprentice may become a Master of Potions himself. The master may never exploit or abuse the apprentice or his powers that is unlawful in the eyes of this Guild and the abiding law. The master shall take his apprentice under his wing and protect and guard him in all respects of his craft and lore, magick and mystery and occupation. The master shall be responsible for lodging, safety, __sanity and shall take full responsibility for his apprentice until the time of apprenticeship ends or both parties agree to terminate the Apprentice Bond. _

_The master shall bestow upon his apprentice the apprenticeship badge so that all may see who the apprentice belongs and answers to. The apprentice shall accept this badge and wear it as deemed appropriate by his master. _

_Thus this apprentice document is sealed, delivered and signed by the life's blood of both the master and apprentice and exchanged by a kiss in the presence and consent of Minerva McGonagall at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. _

"Hold on, let me get this straight. I have to sign in my blood, kiss to seal the document and obey Snape as my master." Harry glanced up from the parchment he held in his hand to the Headmistress who was sitting in front of him behind the big desk.

"In a nutshell, yes," Professor McGonagall smiled at him and Harry glanced back down at the document. It had been delivered today from the Guild for Master of Potions, situated in Rome. Harry had expected it to be longer but it had only been a week since Snape had sent the owl to request the necessary document.

"I understand the rules; at least I think I do. They won't punish us if we break one of those rules…."

McGonagall snorted and poured some more tea in her cup as she said. "I hardly doubt it. Those rules are for Severus to fill in and he will honor the apprentice document, regardless of his personal feelings. He is too dedicated to his craft. I do expect the same from you, Harry since it is a great honor for Severus to take you on as his apprentice."

Harry looked away. "Yeah I know." He mumbled.

He had no doubt that Snape would be fair to him regarding the apprenticeship since Harry knew the older wizard well enough to know that Snape was indeed very dedicated about his craft and Potions. The rules bound them together and Harry would be damned if he would make Snape lose what little trust in him he had, because of something that had mattered to Snape.

"But what is this about that we need to sign it by our life's blood and exchange a kiss?" That was bothering him a little.

"Have you ever heard of the saying 'blood to sign you, kiss to bind you'? It is rather a lot like the ancient fealty bonds, only instead of kissing a ring or somebody's feet, you will sign in your blood and kiss one another."

For some reason Harry got a feeling that she wasn't talking about a kiss on the cheek. He looked away again. Could he do this? He had no idea what an Apprentice Bond would do and how it…

"Severus will be here soon to sign the document and I am sure that if you have any questions, you can address them to him. He will be able to answer most of them."

Harry gave a nod. It was strange, Snape would be his master and would he really have to live with Snape or would Snape allow him to stay in Gryffindor Tower? He remembered Snape telling him about the close bond between a master and an apprentice and Harry really hoped that the bond didn't allow Snape to read his mind or to feel what he was feeling because, right now, Harry didn't even want to feel what he was feeling.

Just as Harry took a sip of his milky tea with sugar, the knock on the door came.

"Enter." Professor McGonagall called out; Harry pretended to be interested in his cup of tea, even as he heard the door open and close as Snape limped closer. He couldn't help but glance up. Snape looked a lot better than he had before, the dark circles underneath his eyes gone and his stance reminded Harry of the old and severe Potions Master.

Snape sat himself down with as much dignity as he could muster and accepted the tea the Headmistress offered him with a graceful nod of the head. The older wizard looked tired and a bit winded from the long walk up and Harry took another sip of the tea, deciding to wait with his questions.

"This is the document?" Snape nodded at the parchment Harry had in his lap. Wordlessly Harry extended it to the Potions Master so Snape could read through it.

There was silence for a few minutes and then the Headmistress cleared her throat and said. "There were some things that confused Harry in the document, Severus."

The keen black eyes turned to meet his own and Harry found the stare to be slightly unnerving but then Snape said. "Is that so? Any specific questions you would like to ask, Potter?"

"Yeah, this Apprentice Bond how is that going to work? Will it allow us to feel where the other is or…?" _Will it allow us to feel what the other is feeling and…._

Snape paused for a moment to take a sip of his tea as he contemplated Harry again before he said. "You should not be concerned with that, Potter. The bond will enable me to feel whenever you are in danger or have need of me. It does not work any other way. There is nothing more to it than that."

"So it doesn't allow you to read my mind?"

Snape's lip curled as he snarled. "Once again you show that you cannot be taught, Potter! Have I not told you explicitly in our Occlumency lessons and have you not seen it first hand on many occasions in the years since then that the mind is not a book to be opened and read at will? Eye contact is necessary and even with such a close bond as an Apprentice Bond; I am not able to read your mind."

"I don't know how such a bond works, alright!" Harry tried to force himself to be civil and polite even as Snape's very tone made his skin crawl. "It isn't like it was taught in school or when I was chasing down Voldemort!"

He was fuming again and he angrily bit his lip. _I lost it again and I promised myself that I would try not to do it…._

"Very well then, I will explain it. The bond between us will mean nothing except to act as a warning system to warn me when you are in peril or when you have great need of me. It will not work when you are thinking of my aid in Potions for an exam or the like. The need must be great enough and it is woven in the ancient magic that is used in this document. Everything that is written in this document must be obeyed. So for example, when in a time of danger, you will have to obey my command if I tell you to flee. Or another example, if you were to, get married in the year that you are my apprentice without my consent, the wedding vows you took would be worthless. Just obey what it says in the document, Potter, I doubt that even you would find that troubling." Snape's tone was biting and Harry clenched his fist.

"Severus, enough!" Professor McGonagall cut in immediately and she leaned forward on the desk, her hands clasped together as she said. "I will hear no more. I have had enough of your bickering, gentlemen. You are both adults and you will be working closely together for a full year so I do ask that you each give the other the respect he is due. Severus, Harry will be your private student and he is your responsibility and for all his faults, he is a powerful wizard who defeated a Dark Lord, thus freeing you as well! Harry, for the next 12 months Severus will be your master and confidant and he has gone out of his way to get you as an apprentice before the Ministry could protest and I do not think that I need to mention what he has done that has brought us all here today. Now, Harry, do you have any more questions for Severus?"

Harry glanced at Snape to see the older wizard scowling as usual but the older wizard did not say anything as Harry said. "Yeah, what should I call you?"

Snape turned to him and Harry could see how Snape grew livid as his dark eyes widen and he hissed. "Insolent whelp, have you learned nothing….?"

Harry was on his feet in a second as Snape launched at him to shake him roughly as he held up his hands. He had only seen Snape livid like this a few times and he said. "No, I don't mean it that way, please understand, I know that I have to call you sir but still…." The dark eyes narrowed dangerously and Harry unsuccessfully tried to pull himself loose.

His magic rose, ruffling his hair as it rose to his agitation. It reached Snape's hand but the older wizard did not pull away as Harry said. "In the document it is said that you are my master, should I call you that, sir? Or should I use your title?"

Instead of releasing him, like Harry would have imagined, Snape peered into his eyes and then answered coldly, releasing Harry roughly so he stumbled into his chair. "You can call me Professor or sir, Potter, if that isn't too hard for you."

He was shaking with rage suddenly, how dared Snape do this? His cheeks burned with the shame. Why did Snape always insist on humiliating him? Couldn't the older wizard just treat him normal for once? Just once but if that was how the rest of the year was going to be then Harry knew for a fact that he didn't want to be Snape's apprentice because….

"Severus, keep that wretched temper of yours under control or so help me, I will lock you both in a room together until you sort your differences out! Is that understood, boys?" Minerva McGonagall warned them both. Her voice had dropped considerably and Snape looked away. Harry looked in the other direction, refusing to look at Snape. He wouldn't go through with this, why should he? Why should he subject himself to another year of hatred and possibly abuse at the hands of Snape when he could very well just stay out of it and see his tutor a few times a week?

Snape took a deep, resounding breath and Harry, despite his best intentions, glanced at the older wizard as Snape said. "I apologize, Potter, it was not necessary for me to use force upon you. I…mistook you for another."

"Apology accepted, Professor." It cost Harry a lot to say those words and his tone came out rather curtly and weary then annoying and cold like he had wanted them to.

He really did wonder if this was the way Snape was going to treat him all through the year, he really hoped not. He had seen the more patient side of Snape before, when they had talked about Potions Masters and he wanted that side shown to him more often, he deserved at least that much.

If he was prepared to show Snape the proper respect then he did expect something in return and he didn't mean in his education. He sighed, it was hard enough to deal with himself and he couldn't cope with Snape as well. Harry sighed loudly.

Hp

The sigh reached Severus' ears as he turned to regard Potter. The green eyed messy haired teen was staring at the floor underneath his dirty sneakers. Surely during one time they had been white but one was unable to tell now. Severus sneered; first thing first, he would make sure that the brat was immaculately dressed the moment the document was sealed.

Severus knew that his treatment of Potter was anything but fair but it took time for Severus to come to terms with the new role Potter was going to play in his life. Potter would be his apprentice at the end of the day and they would have to be suited to their new roles and closeness then. Severus had a feeling it was going to be trial and error.

He reread the document in his lap. He would have to set some rules so that the magic that was used in this document to bind him and Potter together would know when to react and when not. He was certainly not one of the stricter masters who did not allow his students any fun but there were some rules which did not need to be followed, such as the fact that without explicit approval from Severus, Potter couldn't engage in marriage or in any other type of commitment or bond. Not that Severus really cared who the brat ended up with, but it had been done in the middle Ages to ensure that while the apprentice was still in training, nobody could know the secrets of the Guild.

The Guild had lived under the very nose of the Vatican, protected by magic and secrecy in the ancient city of Rome for a thousand years and had attracted all kinds of Potions Masters from all over the world. From the New World, these days referred to as the United States and the mysterious Far East with the new ingredients which could now be bought all over the world.

"Where will I be staying?" Severus looked up as Potter asked the question of Minerva. The old witch looked startled as she asked.

"What do you mean?"

"The document states that I shall dwell with my master. I take it that means that I will have to stay somewhere that Professor Snape will deem appropriate for his apprentice." Strangely enough, instead of the sneer of disgust Severus was sure would taint the word apprentice; Potter sounded the word out almost hesitantly, as if he was unfamiliar with it. The green eyes glanced up at Severus' face, very quickly before they darted back to the safe distance again.

Severus turned his attention to the Headmistress who looked a little puzzled and said. "Yes, that is puzzling. I suppose we could ask the castle to add another set of rooms to Severus' quarters…."

"Potter will be fine up in Gryffindor Tower. I will device a means of communication so that he can floo to my rooms immediately when I have need of my apprentice." Like hell Severus would allow Potter to come into his private quarters as well, there would be no peace from the brat then.

Potter looked at him but Severus refused to meet the green eyes which so reminded him of Lily. He was already spending too much time with the brat and while in the future they would spend even more time together, as both tutor and pup and master and apprentice, Severus knew that he just needed one place where he could rant and rave all he like without offending anybody.

"Professor Snape?" Severus looked back at Potter as the green eyes met his own as Potter asked. "I realize that I will be spending most of my time with you because you are both my tutor and my master but what about my homework from other classes and if I play Quidditch? Can I play it this year or would you rather that I quit the team?"

Severus was amazed; Potter was actually asking him permission to continue to play Quidditch? His eyes narrowed, could this be a trick? Potter was known to be hotheaded and he did not think things through at all, rushing into things without thinking twice, with all the consequences that he had to deal with, such as the death of Black.

Could Potter be that serious about the apprenticeship? Or had Potter grown up suddenly last year? Severus sighed; Potter had been through hell last year, as had they all but Voldemort had been correct that the Gryffindor would blame himself for the death of his classmates and other students. Perhaps the wound went deeper than Severus had first assumed.

He looked at Minerva to buy himself some time. A part of him wanted to snarl to Potter to quit the team and the surge of power he had over the young wizard was slightly intoxicating but the bigger part of him recognized the gesture Potter was making. Potter wanted to make this work and would it really kill Severus to make an effort as well?

Minerva was glaring at him, daring him to say no but even before that thought registered Severus had already made up his mind. He turned in his seat to look at Potter and said. "You will come to my office four times a week after dinner and one afternoon during the weekend. Three to four times will be devoted to Potions, practical or otherwise and the other night will be devoted to Defense or anything else you would like to know and even homework if you so desire. I am sure that with Professor McGonagall's help we can schedule around the Quidditch team practices but you cannot be a team captain this year, Potter, the workload will simply be too much…."

"During Hogsmeade weekends you may go out and as my apprentice you may run errands for me in town. You must, always, let me know where you will go if you are not in the school building. You will provide me with a copy of your time table. I will device a method of communication so that you do not always have to meet me in person when you wish to tell me where you are going. Is that agreeable with you?"

Severus frowned when instead of whining, which he would have expected, Potter smiled at him and nodded. "Uhm, the apprentice badge, what does that look like?"

Potter was watching him with barely veiled interest and Severus took the badge out of his pocket. It looked a little like a prefect badge but it was done in the colors of the Guild, black and red with a small cauldron and a flowing A. All Severus had to do was to tap his wand on it to activate it once the document was sealed.

He showed it to Potter but the younger wizard did not reach out to take it, looking upon it almost reverently like he saw something that he always wanted. It seemed Potter was nearly afraid that if he touched it, it would be gone. The look in his eyes reminded Severus of a lost pup and something in his chest tightened. He looked away, uncomfortable.

"When should I wear it, sir?"

"Always when you are in school and in function as my apprentice. You do not need to wear it when you are in a private house somewhere visiting except, when you are once again, acting as my apprentice. This is not to be taken lightly, Potter and it is a special privilege to serve an apprenticeship with somebody when you are still in school. The Ministry does condone it but they do not look upon it in favor, especially since you will be serving it with me."

"So the Ministry won't recognize it?"

"Oh they will. They have no choice. The Guild is much older and has much more influence in Europe than the Ministry does. If the Ministry would not approve the apprenticeships that the various Guilds in Europe have, they would be alienating themselves from wizarding Europe and they cannot do such a thing. Even our Ministry is not that foolish. They have no choice but to recognize the apprenticeship."

"And the students? Will they recognize it?"

"They will know that you have entered an apprenticeship with me but they have no say in the matter. You will come to me, Potter, if there are any problems. I am your master and it is my duty to see to your safety and sanity like the document states."

Severus tapped the parchment with a long slender finger. There was something in Potter's green eyes that told Severus that something was off. Was it truly just some old words jotted down in a document or was he really responsible for Potter's sanity? The founders knew that Potter needed to speak to somebody, any sane person would if they had just gone through what Potter had gone through.

"Sir?" This time Potter's voice was a little bit hesitant though the green eyes were determent as he asked. "Could I have a moment to speak to you alone?"

Of course, the brat was going to tell him that he didn't want the apprenticeship and….

"You can say what you have to say to me, right here, Potter." Severus answered coolly. He watched as Potter fidgeted and sighed as he glanced at the portraits of the old headmasters sleeping around them and then back at the Headmistress who pretended to be shuffling some papers on her desk.

"Actually, Professor, I would really like to speak to you in private. You are my tutor and soon to be my master and I request it….it is…."

Severus was baffled as he watched Potter struggle to complete the sentence. Potter had reminded him of the oath he would soon take. To look out for Potter as his apprentice and Severus finally gave a nod.

Potter smiled briefly, a tired smile before he rose to walk out of the office. Severus finished his tea and then glanced up at Minerva. She was regarding Potter with a mixture of worry and weariness. Her eyes flickered up to his once and Severus in that moment, that perhaps Potter wasn't going to turn the apprenticeship down at all, for it could possibly be the only thing that kept Potter sane.

Hp

Harry shuffled his feet as he waited for Snape to appear. He shook his head at his own stupidity. Why couldn't he even deal with this on his own? It was just nightmares, nothing that he hadn't dealt with before but…

Something had snapped inside of him when Snape had told him that he was responsible for Harry and before Harry had known it, he had blurted out his request to the man to talk to him in private. He couldn't deal with this if he had to say it in front of Professor McGonagall as well, it was too embarrassing.

Harry had no idea how Snape was going to respond. He might just tell him to bugger off, but Harry had to know if Snape would really look out for him, he had to know so he could take the necessary precautions.

He shuddered with the memories that were too close to the surface these days anyway. He kept himself occupied during the day, researching what had remained of the library and the books Snape had given him or with helping to rebuild the castle but at night…at night it grew so bad that there hadn't even been a night when he hadn't woken up screaming, shivering with sweat and tears before he curled up without getting any more winks of sleep.

It had to change, it couldn't continue like this, especially if he had to serve this apprenticeship well. When it was still vacation he could sleep it off in the mornings but it was getting to him and soon no doubt, Snape would expect him to brew with him and to be up early. Harry couldn't afford it not to sleep half the night, really, something had to change and he had to know where he stood with Snape as his tutor and master.

The door opened and Harry looked up when Snape stepped outside. His eyes took in the older, taller wizard and then Snape said. "Well, Potter, what is it?"

Harry's eyes shot towards the still open door and Snape sighed as he closed it, leaning back against the wall as he folded his arms across his broad chest and said. "We are in private, Potter so say what you have to say."

Harry glanced up at the pale face, the unfathomable black eyes as he tried to gather his thoughts. How was he going to say this without sounding incredibly weak and foolish? He took a deep breath and then said, focusing on the flagstones underneath his feet rather than Snape's face.

"Professor…I…." He couldn't say it. The words wouldn't leave his mouth and he was aware of the silence between them. He would have expected that Snape would have snapped at him by now but once he glanced up, he saw that the Professor was merely regarding him, still leaning back against the wall, one eyebrow raised and then Harry blurted out.

"I have been suffering from nightmares and I won't be up to my usual game unless I can sleep for a full night and I…."

"How long have these nightmares persisted?"

Harry looked away again, feeling oddly vulnerable. "Since I was released from the Hospital Wing."

"And you have been staying up in Gryffindor Tower, haven't you?" Snape pushed himself away from the wall as he continued. "In the Hospital Wing, did you suffer from nightmares as well?"

"Not the whole time. I was really tired at first and then I slept right through the night. I have tried to exhaust myself by helping to rebuild the castle but Madam Pomfrey doesn't want me to use too much magic so I have been trying to lay low for a while and not exhaust myself magically again but it is hard. I read the books in the library and the books you gave me, but still the nightmares persist."

Harry was sure that Snape would proclaim him weak so he looked away. A hand underneath his chin tilted his face up towards Snape. Harry flinched with the close proximity of the older wizard but Snape did not let go. The older wizard peered into his eyes as he said. "Have you applied a glamour again, Potter?"

Mutely Harry shook his head. Snape released his chin and Harry fought the urge to rub it. Snape turned to go back into the office as he said. "Tomorrow morning we begin brewing a Dreamless Sleep potion, Potter. I will have an example ready for you and I expect you to do perfectly. You may compare the two samples that night then if you feel comfortable enough sampling your own potion." Snape smirked at him and Harry raised an eyebrow.

"Somebody should come and check to make sure I don't poison myself."

"I suppose that it is my job as your master then, isn't it?" Snape rolled his eyes quickly before he went back inside.

Within a moment Harry was left alone and no matter how much he may try to tell himself that it really wasn't saying much that Snape promised to make Dreamless Sleep for him, except to show that Harry was a complete failure at Potions, his heart warmed at finally being able to get rid of these nightmares.

Hp

"Now, gentlemen, are we ready to sign this document?" Professor McGonagall looked at them both as she held the quill in her hand. It was a different quill than the one Umbridge had used so long ago and Harry gave a nod.

He was standing in front of the desk with Snape beside him.

"The document has been read by both of you and has been approved?"

"Yes." Snape said before him.

"Yes." Harry's answer was a little bit hesitant, but his voice didn't shake and he was glad for that.

"Now, Harry, you go first with your vow."

Harry swallowed thickly and wetted his suddenly dry lips with his tongue. This was the last time that he could get out. But even before he could address any doubts, he found he hardly had any. He was feeling excited, something he had not felt in such a long time that it took him off guard.

"I, Harry James Potter, swear to you, Severus Tobias Snape, my master, that I shall serve you and obey you in every manner as befits an apprentice of Potions. Your secrets are mine in all craft and lore, magick and mystery. I will obey you in all thoughts, deeds and words as befits this document. I swear to always be truthful to this vow and the words written in the document and signed in my life's blood and sealed…" This time his voice wobbled slightly. "…by this kiss. May my words and deeds always reflect honorably upon you."

He wondered if he did alright or had he messed up horribly but then Snape took a deep breath and said. "I, Severus Tobias Snape, swear to you, Harry James Potter, as my apprentice, to teach you to the best of my abilities in craft and lore, magick and mystery to teach you my craft. I will never explore or abuse this position of power and I will provide you with counseling, teaching, protection, defend you and guard you with the best of my abilities for as long as you require it as my apprentice. As token of the bond between apprentice and master, I shall provide you with the apprenticeship badge. I sign in my life's blood to honor the words documented in this parchment and I seal it by this kiss."

Harry took a deep breath as Snape's hand on his shoulder pushed him forward to take the quill Professor McGonagall handed him. With another deep breath, he quickly signed his name. There was a mere prick in his finger but it faded the moment he lifted the quill.

He stepped back to allow Snape to take up the quill. The older wizard quickly signed his name before he put the quill down and stepped back to stand next to Harry. Professor McGonagall tapped the parchment once with her wand and it glowed red as she said. "So it is signed…."

He didn't have the strength or the bravery to meet the black eyes, no doubt full of mockery and cruelty but then the fingers gently curled underneath his chin. Harry lifted his head and he had to stand on his toes to meet the thin, often malicious lips.

Snape's eyes seemed darker than they ever had before and yet the thin lips that were pressed against his own were surprisingly soft and gentle. For a moment, just a moment, everything was calm and all he could focus on was the feel of Snape's lips on his own and then the older wizard pulled back as he said. "And thus it is sealed."

Harry brushed his fingers across his lips, too lost in his thoughts and so he flinched badly when fingers attached something to his shirt. His eyes shot up but Snape's eyes weren't hard in anger like he would have expected but different, blacker than ever before and Harry longed to uncover the secrets Snape kept before Professor McGonagall said. "Congratulations to both of you. I expect great things, gentlemen."

Harry stepped away from Snape, out of the Professor's personal space and he glanced down at his chest. He was an apprentice to Professor Severus Snape.

**That is it for now. I hope you liked it. Review of course. **

**The next chapter: Will the relationship between Harry and Snape have changed now that Harry is Snape's apprentice or will it have stayed the same? How will their first lesson go? Will Harry's exhaustion get the better of him or will be manage to impress Snape for the first time? How will his friends react when they go and visit him for the first time in a long time? Will the relationship between Ron and Harry be even more strained or will it grow better? That and more in the next chapter: Adjusting**


	8. Adjusting

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thank you for the reviews. Nearly at a 100, wow, let's try to make it a 100. Brewing Time.**_**Prior Incantato **_**is a spell that shows the last spells used by the wand and it does so by emitting a sound that the spell that was cast creates. **

With a loud scream Harry woke up, panting, sitting upright in the bed as he held his wand in a trembling hand. He closed his eyes when he realized that it had been a bad dream again. He ran a weary hand over his head which pounded slightly. His breathing had calmed down and his heart had stopped racing.

It had been a night just like the others. Harry stayed up so late so that he was convinced that he had to fall asleep without dreaming but he was proven wrong. Instead he had tossed and turned until early in the morning.

But just a few more hours and then he would have to be down in the dungeons to brew and…

He fumbled for his glasses on the bedside table, wondering about the time. He managed to find his watch on the second attempt and raised it to his face, squinting at it to decipher the time. Remembering his glasses, he hastily put them on.

His face drained of all color when he realized he had overslept. His clocked showed 10 AM and Harry hurriedly pushed back the heavy curtains that surrounded his four poster bed. The strong summer sunlight streamed in through the windows and Harry crawled out of bed, looking for his clothes.

He pulled his trunk open that stood at the foot of the bed and pulled out the clean clothes.

_Shit, shit, shit. The first day as Snape's apprentice and I am already late._

His head pounded as Harry turned too quickly and Harry groaned. Great, another thing he just couldn't deal with right now. The black robe he had been wearing yesterday was lying on one of the other empty beds and the badge shone proudly in the sunlight, dazzling and blinding Harry.

How could he have slept through his alarm? He had set it before he went to sleep, or had tried to at least. He sighed heavily; Snape was not going to be pleased with him. He dressed himself quickly, a shirt over a pair of jeans and the old sneakers. It was the only pair of shoes he owned and Harry pulled his robes over his every day wear.

He took a quick step to the washroom to wash his face. He refused to look in the mirror, knowing that he looked pale and tired but he refused to be any later than he already was. He wondered if he should go check the Great Hall first but there wasn't any chance of Snape being at breakfast so he decided to go straight down to the dungeons.

In his mind he was already thinking about what he could say. His head flashed with pain every moment Harry tried to imagine Snape's reaction. By the time Harry had managed to reach the cool dungeons, he was sweating already. His head was throbbing now and Harry felt nauseated.

He paused in front of the door to Snape's office and took a deep breath. His headache was pounding right behind his eyes and Harry swallowed thickly. Snape would surely be angry at him.

Even the dim lights in the dungeons were making him feel worse and it seemed with great strength that Harry managed to raise his hand and knock on the door. He waited with bated breath before the deep voice growled for him to enter, dashing all of Harry's hopes that Snape wouldn't be angry.

Harry took another deep breath and then pushed the door open. Snape's old office hadn't changed at all. The lighting was still dim but it helped Harry to focus. His stomach rolled unpleasantly but Harry forced himself to breath evenly to try and ride out the wave of sickness that passed.

Snape was sitting behind his desk, quill scribbling on a parchment but he didn't acknowledge Harry's presence without as much as a nod. Knowing that he was late didn't make Harry feel better and he softly cleared his throat as he said. "Professor?"

"Yes, Potter?" Snape's voice was a low growl and Harry flinched.

He sighed softly and ran a hand over his aching head. His stomach cramped again and Harry closed his mouth with a snap, the words dying on his tongue even before he wanted to utter them. Snape still didn't look up and Harry swallowed dryly before he said.

"I am sorry I am late. I overslept and I know that it isn't an excuse but I…" Harry wanted to continue, he really did but as his stomach gave another painful cramp, he could feel the sour bile rising in his throat. He clamped his jaw shut, hoping not to embarrass himself further by puking his guts out.

His eyes watered as he tried to swallow it away and his headache only seemed to increase. The dim lighting in the office seemed so much sharper suddenly and Harry turned to flee the office to try and reach the restrooms on the first floor but as he exited the office, he knew he was too late.

He lost control and doubled over as the sour bile made his eyes water. His head was spinning and Harry was sure that he would fall over and make a full disgrace of himself, when a strong arm around his waist helped him to stand and pulled him away from the mess on the floor. "Easy now! Take care not to step in it."

Harry's head was aching horribly and he struggled not to throw up again. The person, who was so kindly helping him, eased him down a little bit further down into the hallway and then Harry recognized Snape's voice. "Do you have any medication for your migraines, Potter?"

"Migraines?" Harry blinked up into the harsh looking face which softened slightly and Snape crouched down so he could look Harry in the eye. The dark eyes of his master were close but they didn't appear as cold as they used to and Snape softly said.

"Yes, that is what this type of headache is called. Remain seated here while I fetch the correct potion." The older wizard rose effortlessly and Harry bit his lip as he bit back a moan. _Snape definitely knows now that I can't even take care of myself. It isn't enough that I am late on my first day as an apprentice but I also have to nearly throw up all over his desk…_

Harry hid his burning face in the safe darkness of his arms because it felt loads better then to face the reality.

Hp

Severus' longer fingers pushed the various vials away that he had kept in stock in his personal storage closet. He searched for the familiar vial of migraine potion. But he did not only search his stock but his feelings as well.

He had been angry at Potter when his apprentice had failed to appear on time. The moment Severus had taken Potter on as an apprentice and the boy assumed he could slack off like he had done in school. By the time an hour had passed and the brat had failed to show up, stuttering out an apology, Severus had been seething with anger.

He had refused to storm up to wake Potter up. He would most likely end up using a sticking charm on the boy with his alarm clock. Potter was old enough to know when to get up, even when he was suffering from nightmares.

But when Potter had finally come down, looking pale and sweaty, with dull green eyes that had flashed with pain more frequently than not, Severus had chosen his punishment. He would ignore his apprentice until Potter learned to apologize properly.

Yet he had not expected Potter to storm out a moment later as the bond called out to Severus, becoming an insisted buzzing in his mind that told him that Potter was in trouble. To find his apprentice vomiting outside his office door had not been what Severus had expected.

It seemed that there was something wrong with the younger wizard. He hadn't really anticipated that Potter had spoken truth yesterday about the nightmares. It seemed that Severus had once again managed to misread his apprentice.

His fingers closed around the vial and he read his own spidery handwriting. He turned on his heels carefully to go outside. Inside the lit corridor where he had left Harry, the young wizard was sitting with his head buried in his arms and Severus muttered a spell underneath his breath to dim the lights.

He waved his wand at the pool of green colored vomit and it cleared away at once. He approached Potter slowly, allowing the younger male to have the time to lift his head. Potter struggled and blinked when he managed to lift his no doubt aching head, the dull eyes flashing as Potter's lips turned nearly bloodless as he bit them.

Severus extended the vial as he instructed. "Try to keep it down. I have no desire to have you vomiting all over yourself again." The pale face nearly gleamed with sweat and Severus crouched down as he rested a hand on Potter's knee.

He could almost feel the weariness in the younger man's body as Potter stared at the vial for a moment before he uncorked it and drowned the vial. Potter closed his eyes, Adam's apple bobbing frantically to keep the bitter potion down.

After the initial moment had passed Severus stood back on his feet and hauled Potter up to his feet. The younger wizard swayed but Severus held fast and within a moment they were back in his office and Severus had Potter pressed down in the chair in front of the desk. The brewing could wait; first he needed a long talk with his apprentice.

Hp

Harry sat with his head bowed for a moment longer as the headache slowed to a dull ache and then disappeared a little. He could finally think clearly again and glanced up through his fringe. Snape wasn't looking at him but pouring two steaming cups of tea that he had just summoned before the older wizard said. "So tell me, Potter, why were you late this morning?"

The dark eyes stared into Harry's own with the same old intensity but Harry found that it bothered him less now. If he wanted to apologize for oversleeping this morning then now was the time. He took a deep breath and answered. "I overslept, sir. I was up half the night because I could not sleep from my nightmare. I am sorry I am late, I set the alarm but I…."

Snape extended his hand over the table and said. "Your wand please, Mr. Potter."

Harry glanced up startled, he was already taking his wand out of his pocket and Snape sneered at him as the Potions Master said. "I am taking you shopping for a proper wand sheath, Potter and new clothes. I will not have you dressed in your usual fashion as my apprentice. Now, hand me over your wand so that I can determine that you speak the truth and the last spell you used was to set an alarm on your wand."

Harry felt a twitch of annoyance as he extended his wand. He knew he should trust Snape but he felt uneasy about handing his wand over. Instead of Snape's fingers curling around the other end of Harry's wand like Harry had expected they replaced his own, sending a jolt of awareness down Harry's spine.

Snape took the wand from Harry, dark eyes trained on the holly wood and slowly said, touching his own wand to Harry's... "_Prior Incantato._"

The shrill sound that Harry's wand emitted made his ears ring a little and Snape immediately pulled his wand away. The older wizard almost looked pleased as he extended Harry's wand again, the handle first. Harry was glad that he could handle his own wand again. He had been feeling slightly uneasy at seeing his wand in Snape's hand even when he knew that he could trust his master but still, it was Snape.

"Now, you are aware of why we are here. To see at what level you are at and to target the nightmares. I have prepared a space for you in the next room where you will be brewing the Dreamless Sleep potion."

Harry gave a nod and rose, proceeding Snape into the old classroom.

Hp

The fighting that had nearly destroyed the ancient castle had never entered the dungeons so the old class looked the same as Harry remembered, the cauldrons standing on the tables, some on the floor that were too big to be set down upon the table. Two cauldrons stood off to the side, one filled with the blue potion and the other one empty.

Harry glanced around at the ingredients Snape had laid out, the knives the Potions Master had no doubt handled with care, perhaps even longing to brew again, the stirring rod and all the other instruments he would need to brew a correct potion.

Snape closed the door behind them and Harry turned to look at the older wizard. Snape extended an old potions book and for a moment, foolishly so, the book burned after all, Harry hoped it had been the Half Blood Prince's. He shook his head at the unexpected flash of grief that flared in his chest.

He reached over to take the book from Snape. It was an old potions book like he had thought it to be. Snape waved his wand at the blackboard and the same list of ingredients that no doubt were in the book took place on the blackboard in the spidery handwriting of the Potions Master.

Harry took his place behind the desk, hands reaching for the ingredients. Wasn't it just weird that in the previous years he had been itching to get away from Snape and here he was, standing in the same room with the man, now his master? Harry doubted very much that if it hadn't been for Slughorn, he would never have discovered that he was keen on brewing Potions and enjoyed the workings of the various tasks brewing required.

"You have your ingredients and your instructions, so begin." Snape gestured with a sweeping arm and Harry's mind was already focused on the potion, not seeing his master's dark eyes as they lid up with some inner fire as Snape took his customary place behind the desk.

Hp

Severus glanced down at the paper he had been writing. It was an old research paper that Horace had given him earlier this week when the old Potions Master had heard that Severus had taken on an apprentice. Instead of outright hostility, as Severus would have expected from his colleagues, they had congratulated him on his new position.

It had no doubt everything to do with the fact that Severus had taken Potter as his apprentice. He showed that he was capable of working with the brat and not murdering him on sight. Severus glanced up. Potter was mumbling under his breath, frowning down at his potion that should have reached the stage where it was supposed to be simmering, instead of boiling.

Severus cleared his throat softly as he watched Potter check on the potion, sighing as he lowered the fire quickly. The younger wizard ran an arm over his sweaty forehead and Severus rose from his chair, Potter needed his help.

"What went wrong? It is supposed to be a subtle purple, not bright pink…." Potter was mumbling softly and Severus shook his head, resisting to urge to snap as he said.

"You have added the ginger root too early. Stir the potion counterclockwise for fifteen minutes while you chop the ginger root."

Potter glanced up, green eyes still a bit dull but then gave him a brilliant smile. Severus was taken aback. Why had the brat reason for smiling like that at him? His lip curled and Potter looked away in a moment.

"Sir, how do I chop the root while stirring the potion at the same time?" The question earned a growl from Severus as he snapped out behind him.

"Use your wand, Potter. You aren't a wizard for no reason!"

He strode back to his desk, ignoring his aching muscles at the ferocity of his stride. He knew he would pay for it later but he didn't care now. He refused to be shown as being weak and damn Potter for being his apprentice but Severus would be damned before he would allow Potter to help him.

Potter was staring down at his potion, the green eyes dull as Potter winced when Severus slammed his hand down on the table. "Get to work." He growled suddenly, annoyed at Potter's stalling.

Potter glanced up, the green eyes narrowed as he hissed. "You could actually show me how it is done, _master_!" The honorary title hung tensely in between them and Severus bit back another growl. Potter was right as usual. It was his duty as the boy's master to show Potter how it was done and since he never allowed wands with potions in class, it was not strange that Potter didn't know how it was done.

He paced back around the desk, forcing himself to take a deep breath. His apprentice was still glaring at him, the dark brows furred over the green eyes hidden behind the glasses and for a moment Potter's eyes flashed with power. Severus was reminded with a start just how powerful Potter was but he refused to allow it to show.

He approached the younger wizard as he said. "Direct your magic to the stirring rod while you tend to your roots."

Severus knew that Potter didn't need any direction on how to direct his magic. Six years at a magic school should have learned him that much. The messy haired teen shifted his stance a little and waved his wand at the stirring rod, causing it to give a feeble twitch but not the stir that Severus would have expected. His eyebrow rose.

Potter frowned at his wand before he closed his eyes, a grimace of pain on his face and completed the movement again. This time the stirring rod didn't even twitch and Severus sneered. "You can't even make a stirring rod do a stir. How pathetic, Potter."

"Then you do it!" Potter growled at him, voice tight. The younger male was pale but defiance shone in the eyes and Severus smirked as he waved his wand and the stirring rod began to do what it had been designed to do.

With a mere flick of his wrist Severus ended the spell and the stirring rod banged against the side of the cauldron with a small sound. Potter flinched again and Severus purred. "You are even unable to do the most simplest of task, Potter. How unfit for an apprentice you are."

Severus watched as the color drained from Potter's face before a flush appeared as the younger male burst out. "_How dare you? _You promised….the contract…."

"The contract is nothing more than some written up lines, you miserable imp. I had assumed by now you knew and…."

Severus kept his voice low. He had known the exact reason Potter couldn't perform magic but he had refused to say it. Why hadn't Potter told him so? They were supposed to share things as master and apprentice.

He wasn't prepared however when Potter stormed at him, full of rage suddenly as the younger wizard hissed. "You are a true bastard, you are. First you let me sign this contract with the promise that…."

Potter's voice was choking on a sob and the young wizard tripped over his own feet. Severus caught him by the upper arms and shook Potter roughly as he hissed. "Stop the theatrics this instance! I have no taste for them. If you don't understand something, you ask! If you can't do something, you tell me so! You know you are depleted and on _explicit orders _not to use any magic but one command from me and you ignore them. _What kind of person are you that just forgets orders?_"

Potter took a deep breath, struggling against Severus' grip as he hissed. "The contract stated that you were supposed to see about my welfare, and that you are supposed to take care of me…"

Severus growled with disdain. "You are an adult! You can look after yourself in at least this regard!"

Potter froze in Severus' grip and the Potions Master could see how the green eyes shot with pain suddenly as Potter pulled himself away and said coldly as he packed his stuff away. "Yes, it is what Harry Potter does best, isn't it? To look after himself!"

Severus' mouth opened and then closed with a snap. He wanted to order his apprentice to stay but as he watched Potter leave, he knew he had crossed a line and shattered something valuable and while normally it didn't bother him, he found that the taste of this knowledge was very bitter.

Hp

Harry was fuming as he stormed away from the dungeons. He had expected Snape to storm up after him and to shout at him but he now knew the older wizard didn't care. He didn't care about Harry being his apprentice or anything else, no, Snape only cared about himself, and even about that Harry wasn't entirely sure.

What a fool had he been. Just because Snape was his master now didn't mean anything as the older wizard had just proven. Harry was on his own again, as usual.

The knowledge left a bitter taste on his tongue and the words wound themselves around his heart. He refused to allow it to show as he blinked the burning sensation in his eyes away roughly. _Damn Snape and damn me for believing in petty lies and foolish assumptions. _

He ignored the aching in his head that was begging him to slow down, why should he? That pain felt loads better than the other one in knowing that he had been disappointed again. Snape was right; Harry was an utter failure, a freak.

And he was even more of a freak for refusing to believe that anybody may actually want or need him. He had done his duty to the world and now all he was, was some obnoxious brat who didn't know his own place and…

"Harry?" One of the most welcoming sounds in all of the world and Harry glanced up. Before him stood Hermione and Harry grinned suddenly. This had been what he had needed, a friendly face.

He hadn't even been aware that he had already made it to the destroyed Entrance Hall as he changed his direction and walked towards her. "Hermione!"

His female friend didn't smile as Harry rushed towards her. She looked upset for some reason and Harry slowed his pace, especially when he spotted Ron standing next to her. They hadn't spoken after their fight at the Burrow, and well since Harry had been staying at Hogwarts since then, he hadn't seen either of his friends.

Ron's lip curled in much the same way that Snape usually did when he spotted Harry and for some reason it struck a cord within Harry. He regarded Ron coldly as he turned his attention to Hermione and as she exclaimed. "You're alright."

Harry frowned. "Of course I am…."

"You didn't return and there wasn't any word until Professor McGonagall owled us that you were in the Infirmary because you were suffering from magical depletion and…."

"He looks fine to me. But I guess that is how Potters slip by, pretending to be weak and needy and then slither by to take something that belongs to somebody else. It seems that the Slytherins that you have been hanging around with so many times have finally rubbed off on you!" Ron sneered.

Harry merely raised an eyebrow as he said. "Why should you care? Is that why you came here? To insult me. Then you can leave again…"

"I came to bring Hermione because she was worried about you. Can't imagine why she should be since you don't care about anybody? I imagine that not caring for everybody gets to you after a while! Is this how you repay your friends, Potter? By taking stuff that rightfully belong to them?"

Harry frowned and looked away to chew on his lip. It hurt that Ron said that he didn't care for anybody because it wasn't true. He did care for people. He cared for Hermione and he still cared for Ron and he cared for Ginny, or well he believed he did at least.

"Look, I am sorry, alright. I wanted to owl you but I wasn't allowed out of bed and I send an owl as soon as I was able after. I didn't hear anything back so I assumed it was alright."

"We weren't there. We went to see my parents in Australia to try and restore their memory."

"Oh Hermione, I am so sorry that I wasn't there…." Harry felt ashamed. His friend had gone through some bad and he had wanted to be there for her. How could he have been so stupid?

"And then we come home and we have three anxious owls waiting for us to tell us that you have been _injured_ and so we rush over here to find you not only _well _but an apprentice to Snape too. Imagine my surprise." Ron spoke in a heavy tone and Harry turned to the taller red head.

He suddenly felt guilty and he had no idea why. It had been a good opportunity to be Snape's apprentice, even when it had all backfired and proved just how alone he really was….

"Look, I…."

"That apprenticeship was Hermione's! She deserves it, not you! You have people falling all over themselves to offer you a job and you go after the one thing that would show the world that Hermione is a brilliant witch and you take that away too! Can't you ever just leave something alone?"

"She can have it…." Harry mumbled softly under his breath.

"You…what are you saying?" Ron was caught off guard by Harry's soft spoken words.

"I said she can have it! I don't want it anymore! Snape is the same bastard he always is. Now he just has a legal excuse to do it. Go ahead, Hermione, take the apprenticeship if you want to, cause it doesn't matter to me. Snape made it clear that he thinks I am an incompetent fool so you can have it, Hermione. Perhaps Snape will treat you better than me and hopefully see that you aren't the only one who is sincere in trying this."

"Harry, Snape chose you for a reason and besides, what Ron is saying isn't true. I have already been offered an apprenticeship with Professor McGonagall if I want to so it is fine…you should just keep working hard and…"

"It doesn't matter if I am or not, Snape doesn't see it. Look, I appreciate that you came to visit and all but as you see I am fine. Like Ron said, since I obviously don't have anybody to care about so I am going to wallow in self pity now. If you need help with your parents, let me know." And while Harry knew he wasn't the only one feeling miserable, he pushed himself away from his friends. He didn't care at the moment. There was just too much hurt in him to really care and he didn't even stop when Ron called his name.

Hp

"Mr. Weasley!" Severus barked at the youngest Weasley son. The red haired boy turned to look at him and the hateful expression froze on his face. Severus stepped closer; a gleeful smirk twisted his lips before he hissed. "Stop blaming Potter for the pain the Dark Lord caused! It isn't his fault that your brother chose to fight and neither is it his fault that your brother got killed, shameful as it may be."

Weasley's expression twisted as Ronald sputtered. "_How dare you? _If he had just given himself up like Voldemort requested then none of this wouldn't have happened and Fred wouldn't have died…."

"Do you have any idea what the Dark Lord would have done to your _best _friend then? Potter would have been made an example of, suffering long and lots before he would have died. _If _he had been even allowed to die! If that was the destiny you wished for your friend instead of the one where he killed an adult wizard while he was a child, then end this friendship but do not blame him for things he cannot control! He is doing a fine enough job of that on his own."

"You are a fine one to talk, you are! You take him on as an apprentice and you don't even pretend to like him then why did you take him on except to insult him? You are destroying him just as much as I am." Ronald's face was red with anger and Severus could see that the youngest Weasley did still care for Potter.

"The Dark Lord already destroyed him, Weasley; we are just chopping the remaining bits off of him to see what lies beneath. To see the real Potter! You and I are far more alike than you realize!"

"Stuff it you hateful git! I still care for him unlike you!"

"Then you have a very funny way of showing it!" Severus snarled before Ronald released a hiss of pain and anger before he cast an angry look at Granger and left, stomping away angrily.

Severus straightened with a slight grimace of pain, refusing to acknowledge Granger.

"Are you going to show the same feelings to Harry, Professor?" Her voice was soft and Severus turned to look at her.

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Ms. Granger."

"What you just said to Ron, are you going to show it to Harry too? I daresay that he will need to be reminded much more than Ron does."

"I do not appreciate you trying to tell me how to handle my apprentice, Ms. Granger." Severus said curtly.

"I am not telling you how to handle your apprentice, Professor. I am advising you how to handle Harry Potter but I suppose that you already know not to handle him like you normally do, for he has changed as have you. Good day Professor." And with a sweet smile and a nod of the head, Ms. Granger left, leaving Severus gaping behind her.

Hp

The Giant Squid was lazily sunning himself on a shallow part of the lake but Harry had no eyes for it. The sunlight was making his head ache but once again, Harry paid no mind to it. How could he have been such a fool?

He had really expected Snape to treat him differently but why had he even thought so? Snape would never treat him like an equal, never. No, he would always be inferior to Snape. Perhaps Ron had been right and Harry should have allowed Hermione to become Snape's apprentice. Obviously his friend was a much better student then he would ever be, even Snape himself said it.

It had felt so nice to know that there was somebody who would finally guide Harry and who wouldn't mind it if he made a mistake. To know that there was somebody who was looking out for him and who wouldn't blame him if he did something wrong simply because he didn't have all the facts.

That person should have been Sirius, or Remus. They should have been taking care of him and guiding him, showing him the world like the godfathers they had been of him and the friends of his father they were. But they had failed in their task. As had Dumbledore, the older wizard should have been a mentor and not somebody who indulged Harry and then berated him when he felt like it.

Harry had always needed somebody who had a strict hand and who treated him fairly and allowed him to be himself. That person should have been Snape because the older wizard wasn't only Harry's tutor but most importantly his master, his mentor but it seemed that Snape didn't like the task so the year would be worthless and…

"Mr. Potter?" Harry didn't acknowledge Snape's presence. He sighed. He had thought he had done everything right but it seemed that he hadn't accomplished the thing he should have accomplished and that was that Harry was Harry and Snape had always hated Potter….

"Mr. Potter, I apologize for my earlier words. They were spoken harshly and were unnecessary." Harry merely shuddered.

"It doesn't matter, does it? Nobody wants me so why should I inflict myself on you unwillingly?" Harry mumbled softly, hugging his knees to his chest. He didn't need Snape's help to make him feel miserable.

"Potter, that isn't true…" Harry could hear Snape was feeling uncomfortable.

"Oh, I think it is! You wanted Hermione as your apprentice; there is no need to say it, Professor."

"I didn't offer the apprenticeship to Ms. Granger, Harry, I offered it to you. While Ms. Granger is a smart and capable witch, she does not dare to cross the lines quite like you do. Potions aren't about following the rules but it is about feeling your way through it. Everybody can brew a perfect potion but few can create an exceptional potion that few can forget. _That_ is what makes a Potions Master."

"Is that supposed to be a compliment? Cause it didn't sound like one." Harry glanced to his right to see his master sitting beside him. Snape looked as out of place outside on the school ground as the Dursleys would have at Hogwarts.

"Well to compliment you outright would require a big character change on my side. I do not think that you are quite ready for that yet." The thin lips curled into a smirk and Harry smiled despite himself.

He sobered and looked away as Snape said, looking out at the lake. "You know I am not a pleasant and patient man, Potter. This will get much harder than what has happened today but in the end, should you prevail, it will be worth it."

"Well I have never been one to give up, so you better prepare yourself."

"Merlin forbid Potter but I don't encourage and accept giving up so you know what you are in for."

"I knew the moment I signed the document, or at least I thought so."

"I am sorry, Potter, I had assumed that you would view the apprenticeship differently and I did not realize that you would depend on me so."

"Does it bother you if I would? You need to guide me, Professor because I thought that the document spoke truth. But if it doesn't, then you need to let me know so I can prepare myself for it. Contrary to belief, I am capable of taking care of myself." Harry looked at Snape and the older wizard glanced back at him.

"You can be assured that I will abide by the contract and will look after you in all regards." Snape gave another nod as he watched the smile Harry couldn't hide and extended a vial. The older wizard got to his feet the moment Harry accepted the vial and after a quick, "I will see you tonight at dinner, Potter," the Potions Master left.

Left alone Harry glanced at the vial and smiled when he noticed it was Dreamless Sleep; perhaps this apprenticeship with Snape may not be so bad if his master would indeed look after Harry, for Harry knew that he needed it.

**I hope you liked it. Review of course. I mean the looking after part as that Harry has always been on his own and nobody ever called him on his duties, rights and responsibilities and Snape will do so. I hope that makes sense. **

**The next chapter: Harry, Snape and the rest of the school prepare for the return of the students but are they prepared? Is Harry prepared to not only see Ginny again but also Draco Malfoy? And can Snape hold his own when the students return or will Harry come to the defense of his master? That and more in: the start of term. **


	9. The Start of Term

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Yay, we passed ****100 reviews. I am so happy. So first day of the new term, let's begin. Oh right, the story is being translated into French. I am so happy: d**

The red beautiful Hogwarts express had always been a source of joy to Harry when he saw it at King's Cross station. It meant getting away from the Dursleys and back to everyday life at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, his home.

But this time, the feeling was different. Oh there was joy, no doubt about that but Harry had mixed feelings when he saw the Hogwarts express coming into Hogsmeade station. Would the first year students be guided by boats over the lake again and just how many students could see the Thestrals now that they had witnessed the Final Battle?

Harry stood on the stairs that led to the main doors, his view from the small village of Hogsmeade and the fire red train that came rolling into the station was marvelous. He wondered how many people would be returning to Hogwarts this year. It was only the first of October; mere months after the Final Battle and the castle had not yet been fully repaired.

There was enough room for the students to have their lessons and to resume most activities but the east wing was closed off to the public. Other sections of the ancient castle were held together by magic and it seemed to be the wish of the castle for some places to remain as monuments for every moment that it was repaired, the castle made sure that it was brought back to the former state of destruction.

Harry had helped enough with trying to rebuild the castle that he had seen it first hand on many occasions. Snape did not always have work for him since the Potions Master was still recovering from his injury and trying to stock his storerooms with his ingredients again. Slughorn had used it all, Snape had growled.

Harry fingered his apprentice badge which he had pinned to his robes. He was waiting for Ron, Hermione and Ginny to come off the train and whoever else would be on there. What kind of welcome would he receive? Would he even be welcome at all or would it be like his sixth year? People hated him and didn't trust him.

"Mr. Potter, you and I are going to Diagon Alley next weekend to pick up some tailored robes for you and some decent shoes. I refuse to have my apprentice dressed like a homeless person." The deep voice had a slightly husky tone to it and Harry turned to find Snape standing beside him.

The older wizard was dressed in his customary black robes and his cold black eyes were currently on Harry's face. Harry allowed the inspection as he had come to call it. Ever since he had fled the potion's classroom when they had first brewed together and Snape had come after him to apologize, the older wizard had made sure Harry ate enough and got regular hours of sleep.

Harry's magic had come back quickly after that and the Dreamless Sleep he had been taking steadily since then had improved his night rest, allowing him to concentrate on his studies with Snape, which were hard enough without the tiredness and fog headedness.

"Of course, sir." Harry offered meekly. He always made sure that he dressed in his clothes he had kept for school and the few Hermione had shrunk for him when they had been on the run last year. But it seemed that Snape had caught on that Harry was always wearing the same clothes, even when he send them to the house elves to be cleaned.

"Good. We need to discuss something. You will continue to abide by the rules I set you about your bedtime and take the nutrition potions twice a day as I have told you. You are still recovering from the battle and I will not have you collapsing simply because the other students return. Should there be any trouble, you know where to find me."

"Of course sir." Harry didn't even need to force his voice to become civil because currently, he knew that he owed how he was feeling to Severus Snape, his master. The Potions Master had been taking care of him, offering him the chance to talk if Harry needed it, even when Harry had yet to take his master up on it.

"I have devised a method of communication." Snape suddenly announced and Harry turned back to look at the wounded wizard. Snape's color had improved greatly and it was slowly returning to the older wizard's normally sallow color and for some reason, it did make Harry extremely glad that Snape wasn't so pale anymore.

"Oh, what is it?" Harry turned back to the taller wizard beside him and Snape raised a dark stern eyebrow and Harry hastily added, "Sir."

Snape's fine boned hand disappeared in his pocket and Harry pretended not to be curious. It was harder to contain as he cast shy glances towards his master as Snape took something out of his pocket and Harry finally turned directly to the older wizard.

He wondered what Snape had come up with. Would it be a coin like Dumbledore's Army and Draco Malfoy had used? Or would it be something like a talking patronus? It would be very cool if he could cast that particular spell. He wondered if his stag would produce his own voice or would it take on a deep voice, his father's voice perhaps?

"This is it." Snape held out a dark leather bracelet with a metal charm woven into it that bore a striking resemblance to a striking snake but Harry wasn't sure when suddenly the charm transformed into a flowing S. Harry glanced up, did Snape really intend for him to have that bracelet? Harry had only ever worn his watch and well, this kind of seemed like a bit girly.

It could be a joke of course and Snape would have no doubt had an old grand laugh over it but Harry refused to acknowledge it. Instead he held out his hand and asked. "What does it do?"

Snape's lip curled and he disposed the leather band into Harry's hand. Immediately Harry could feel the forceful swirl of Snape's magic as it swept over his palm before it hummed inside the bracelet. Harry gasped at the odd sensation that erupted over his skin, the almost pleasant feeling of knowing that Snape was close by as the older wizard purred.

"The leather is infused with my magic so that all know who you belong to…." Harry's eyes snapped up to meet the dark eyes as they stared into his own with an intensity that would have been frightening."…who you obey and who your master is. The metal will heat and glow a color for whenever I have need of you and how quickly. Green for a task, yellow for a semi emergency and red for an emergency that cannot wait. I do not care the circumstances you are but when this band flashes red, you better be at my side in less than 3 seconds, Potter, or _else_. Tap your wand to the bracelet and it will immediately allow you to floo to my location in the castle or to Apparate to my location should I be someplace else. Needless to say, you'll wear the bracelet at all times. You may cast a glamour of illusion charm over the bracelet to allow it to remain hidden from sight should you wish it so."

"Will the bracelet continue to do this? I can feel your magic humming in the bracelet."

"Yes, it will. Other people will feel it should they touch the wrist you wear the bracelet upon." Snape produced a similar bracelet out of his pocket and held it in his hand. There was an H instead of an S and Snape said. "You need to choice an animal so the charm will shift to that in the eyes of muggles."

"You want me to pick an animal?" Harry was uncertain as he stared up at Snape. The older wizard gave a nod, his slender hand holding out the bracelet as he said.

"Touch your wand to the bracelet and think of the animal. The magic should respond to your thoughts and desires and the magic will be infused in the bracelet like mine is in yours."

"You will wear it as well, sir?" Harry didn't even know why he was asking but if he was to wear the bracelet alone he suddenly felt like a prisoner.

"Yes, so if you have an emergency, just tap the bracelet and I will know what will happen. We will work out a coding signal for the colors. Now touch your wand to the bracelet, Potter and focus your magic for a moment."

Harry held his breath as he touched his wand to the bracelet. He wasn't even sure what animal he could be thinking about but suddenly there was a flash of light and Harry felt a sharp tug on his magic. There was even a puff of smoke and then Snape snorted.

Harry coughed to try and clear the smoke from his lungs and flushed immediately. There, on Snape's hand was the same dark leather band only this time with the H replaced with a panther which showed the enormous fangs and had a paw extracted with the dangerous claws but that wasn't the worst of it, no Harry actually felt quite proud of the animal but it was the dark green bands suddenly woven all around in the dark leather.

"Uhm, sir, I didn't mean for that to happen and I…"

"I think that you did, Mr. Potter. Remember that the magic responds to your feelings and inner thoughts. But it is of no matter." Snape's voice wasn't icy as Harry had expected and the older wizard tapped his wand on the bracelet but nothing happened.

The older wizard's expression changed from amusement to weary as he mumbled under his breath while he once more tapped the bracelet. Harry tried to keep his grin hidden but he failed at the sight of the expression on Snape's face.

The bands remained cheerfully woven into Snape's bracelet and finally the older wizard put his wand away, sighing. Harry tried not to meet his master's gaze as he told his shoes. "I am sorry."

"Somehow I doubt that, insolent imp." Snape said curtly before he continued. "Hold out your arm, Mr. Potter so that I can fasten the bracelet around your wrist. Only you or I will be able to charm it off so do not try to attempt others to try for the reproductions will be severe."

Harry gave a nod and rolled up his sleeve. Snape's fingers were dry and warm on his skin as they fastened the bracelet around his wrist. Harry shivered a little and met his master's eyes. The magic flared for a moment before settling against his skin and as Harry shuddered his sleeve back into place. The magic faded to a hum and Harry tried to bury the thought that kept resurfacing. _I could grow used to this._

Hp

Severus' fingers touched the bracelet in his own pocket and he muttered a charm. He looked down to find that the green bands woven into the bracelet still stood out. He huffed. He had tried every charm and non verbal spell he knew to change them but to no avail.

Severus looked beside him to find Potter watching him, doing his best to hide a grin. The younger wizard looked away at once when Severus raised a dark eyebrow and Severus sighed. Trust his insolent apprentice to show a rare magical potential.

He finally took the bracelet out of his pocket and said. "Well, fasten it around my wrist. I will try other charms later to see if I can charm the colors back."

Potter's face fell and Severus felt a tightening near his heart. _Damn the brat._

"Of course, sir." Potter softly said. Severus could almost see the disappointment in Potter's face and the thoughts that no doubt were running around the young wizard's head and as the seeker's quick fingers fastened the bracelet around his wrist, Severus looked critically at the bracelet.

The dark leather was the best he could have chosen, it could stand to be wet and would stand heat without endangering the charms done upon the leather but the dark green leather bands were an almost welcome pattern that broke the dark leather up. It wasn't half bad, Severus decided.

He touched the bracelet and felt the hum of Potter's strong magic before it settled against his skin. Severus ignored the feeling it invoked and finally said. "It will do."

Potter's head snapped up and Severus found himself subjected to the stare of those bright emerald green eyes that blinked in confusion for a moment before Potter said. "You mean you will…"

"I will allow you to put this touch upon the bracelet, yes, you wretched lion." Severus finally snarled. It had nothing to do with the grateful look Potter send his way or the way the green eyes seemed a little more peaceful, not one damn bit.

Hp

Harry sat all alone at the Gryffindor table, nervously playing with the edge of the tablecloth. He cast a look at the teacher's table to see the teachers all assembled and sitting there, the picture of serenity. He sure as hell didn't feel like that.

How would the rest of the school react once they walked through those doors and saw him sitting here? Would they keep walking or would they turn back and even refuse to be in the same room with him?

Harry had no idea but it was always the easiest to go with the worst case scenario. The others were easier to deal with otherwise. He cast a look at the head table again and Snape was looking at him, the dark eyes glittering oddly. Harry sat up straighter. He had as much right to be here as anybody else and if the students couldn't deal with that, well bad luck.

He had saved them all from Voldemort without once even complaining. He had stood between them and every bad thing that Voldemort had stood for. He had saved them and protected them, even when he hadn't been there last year to withstand the Carrows and everything else, he had been on the run for worse things, knowing that if Voldemort caught him, he would be tortured before he would have been allowed to die, if Voldemort had even wanted to kill him.

He glanced up when the murmur of many voices came and the footsteps of the students. He tensed and for a brief moment he felt Snape's magic flare against his skin as if the Potions Master himself tensed.

The first students that entered looked around at the Great Hall, the very sight of the final confrontation between Harry and Voldemort and where so many people had seen that Harry had in the end done the unthinkable and prevailed.

Harry may not have known it at the time but he knew that there weren't many people who truly believed that he could do. How could they when he had been on the run and not standing up for them and saving them? Had they even known what would await him had he done so? What would have awaited him if he had been captured?

The students then stared at the placque that had been left in the Great Hall, right in front of the Head Table and where the Sorting Hat used to sit which now sat a little bit to the right. There marked the place where the evils hell of a man had fallen and Harry swallowed thickly.

Next the attention of the students returned to Harry and they stood staring, simply staring and Harry felt the weight of all of those stares as he tried his best not to feel nervous because of it.

"Let me through! What is so bloody interesting that you all have to stop and stare?" The drawling voice made the skin of Harry's neck prickle as he recognized Draco Malfoy's voice. The youngest Malfoy stared at Harry and then said. "Good grief, get used to Potter, he is part of the furniture."

Harry raised a surprised eyebrow at the antics of the older male. Malfoy's and his hatred was notorious in the Wizarding School but it seemed that the recent years had changed the blond wizard. Malfoy was pale and he looked like he had lost weight. The blond hair looked nearly white in the light that came from the many candles in the hall and the grey eyes looked tired and slightly red rimmed. Harry was sure that he couldn't mistake the gaunt look that Draco's face held.

Malfoy was the first one to walk to the Slytherin table and muttering amongst themselves and staring at Harry and the Great Hall the students soon followed. Many more students entered and all of them stared at Harry, even the ones who sat down at Gryffindor table.

They sat at a large distance from Harry and soon the ends of both tables were filled up, leaving a large gap in the middle of the table where Harry sat. Some students greeted him and he smiled at them, trying to greet back but most students ignored him or murmured about him, some actually staring up at the Head Table to see Snape sitting next to Professor McGonagall.

"So he is back. I wonder how long that will be."

"Well, you heard what Potter said. Snape was on our side and the Ministry didn't prosecute him…"

"That doesn't mean anything!"

"Well, Potter's word is enough for me and it should be for you. You saw what happened…"

"It could be a lie and…"

Harry was amazed as he watched the slow trickle of students enter. It seemed to him that not even all the students which had been here before had returned. There weren't even a quarter of the students that had entered but perhaps more were coming.

"HARRY!" Harry glanced up startled, his wand slipping from his sleeve the moment the cry came and it seemed that more students shared that opinion as they stared around at the source of the cry. Ginny was making her way towards him, a large smile on her face, and even before Harry knew it, and she sat down on his lap and whispered. "I missed you so much. Where have you been?"

She didn't wait for an answer for the next moment her arms were wrapped around his neck and her soft lips touched his own. Harry wanted to protest that Ginny was kissing him like this in the Great Hall without even a greeting.

"Ginny!" Harry could hear Ron's voice and Hermione's cry of indignity as Ginny kissed him deeply, not caring that Harry wasn't responding or that his arms weren't even wrapped around her but hanging at his sides, curling into fists as he tried to control himself.

His first instinct was to push Ginny away but her arms were wrapped too tightly around him and her kiss was too deep. All Harry felt was embarrassment to be singled out in such a fashion. Sure the kiss was nice but he didn't want to be kissed now. He didn't want to stand out.

Snape's magic in the bracelet hummed more forcefully against his skin and Harry's eyes widened as he thought about what his master would say. What would Snape say if he saw Harry kissing Ginny like that? He had told Harry in explicit terms that he couldn't form a commitment without Snape's consent.

Did Ginny expect that Harry was going to ask her to marry him? But he had so much that he had to think about and to settle before he could even think of marriage….It was…

It was a strange feeling that overcame him that Harry didn't need to marry Ginny or anybody or make any romantic commitments or promises as long as he was Snape's apprentice. That notion brought a peace to his mind that had long been absent and Harry pushed Ginny away by putting his hands on her shoulders and pulling his head back.

Her brown eyes were wide as they stared into his own and Harry knew that Ginny had felt how he had responded to the kiss. Or lack thereof. Her pretty face consorted with anger as she took his right hand, fingers slipping over the bracelet. For a moment her eyes widen in confusion and then she looked past him, over his shoulder directly at the Head Table and Harry didn't need any eyes in the back of his head to know she was looking at Snape.

Her eyes were blazing as she turned back to look at him before with a sweet smile, she wrapped an arm around his neck and a hand in his hair to pull him forward into a kiss. Harry resisted and calmly reached up to remove her arm as he said. "Ginny, stop this!"

"Stop what, Harry?" She asked innocently, curling up in his lap and tracing patterns on his chest.

"This." He gestured with the hand she wasn't holding to her curled up like a kitten in his lap. "There are enough empty spots at the Gryffindor table for you to sit on your own. I'm not a chair."

Her face showed hurt and she hissed. "But I like sitting here."

"And I don't! If we're in Gryffindor tower it is fine but not in the Great Hall. I don't need you to draw any more attention to me." Red infused her face and Ginny got up in a moment, towering over him.

"Oh and when you are in Gryffindor tower you'll have another excuse for us not to cuddle. I never get to see you again; Harry and I didn't even know that you'd been injured. You could've told me, you know. I'm your _girlfriend _after all!"

"I didn't tell anybody because I assumed that you've known or been informed already. I've been a little busy you know…"

"Yeah, with Snape!" Her tone rose accusingly and Harry tried to keep his magic under control as it rose to defend him. He squeezed it down ruthlessly, it couldn't get out of hand now, and he couldn't afford and allow it.

"Keep your voice down. I don't want a scene." He hissed at her and Ginny paled. She swayed for a moment and her eyes flashed and then she shouted. "I hate you, Harry James Potter! We'll talk about this but I'll be sure to do it in private then since you only consider what you want and never what anybody else wants!"

With those words she stormed out and Harry could feel all eyes in the Great Hall upon him as he shrunk back into his seat, judging him and some no doubt laughing at him. Snape's magic soothingly raised goose bumps on his skin but Harry refused to look at the Head Table to see his master's condescending gaze.

He heard Hermione huff beside him and snapped at her, meeting her angry gaze. "What?"

"Don't you think that could've gone a little better?" She said.

"Oh, no kidding, I thought it was perfect the way it was." He snarled sarcastically. Her eyes narrowed and she hissed.

"Don't take that tone with me, Harry Potter! Ginny has been worried sick about you…."

"Yeah, funny way to show it to snog me senselessly instead of asking!"

"You weren't exactly waiting for her either!" Hermione seemed to swell with the injustice of the situation in her eyes.

"What was I supposed to do? Wait around the bloody station for you lot. You've got any idea how cold it is?"

"It is what a friend would do!" Hermione bristled.

"Yeah, I've been a very lousy friend, ridding you of a dark lord and then focusing on my own recuperation and getting my own life in order instead of fawning over everybody else. I'm so sorry…" Harry growled. He was getting fed up with this. Was everybody queuing to lecture him?

"Stop pretending then and say what you want!" She cried out.

"Fine, I'll be sure to print it the moment I figure out what it is the bloody world expects of me to do and what it is that I actually want, alright!"

"You're impossible, Harry Potter!"

"It is my middle name, right along with the Boy Who Lived and the Chosen One!" He sneered with a sneer worthy of Snape himself.

Hermione let out a frightening hiss that was a mixture of rage and pain and Harry looked at her, finally saying. "Sod off if you're going to give me a piece of your mind to trying to make me feeling guilty, Hermione, I am doing that well enough on my own."

Hermione paled and then rose, pushing her chair back before she stormed out of the hall. Harry sighed, that was the second female in ten minutes he had managed to chase away. Perhaps he could make it 3 out of three as he turned to Ron who was calmly sitting beside him, blinking at the deafening silence Hermione's departure had left behind.

"Now you've got another reason to hate me. I don't only make Hermione miserable but your sister as well." Harry said coldly, casting a glance at his best friend.

Ron looked back calmly and then shuddered and said. "Well, I wouldn't tolerate what she said just as much as you did and Ginny, well…I wouldn't have liked what she did, truthfully, I didn't."

"I know, I mean she could've just said hello and be done with it. I don't need the whole school to know that she is fond of me."

"Looks more like lust to me, mate." Harry grimaced and met Ron's grin as he said.

"That must make you very happy."

"You know me, I am an easy guy to please, a little bit of food, not too much homework, plenty of sleep and some money to go round and Hermione and I am happy." Harry laughed for the first time in what felt like ages, or at least since the students came in.

"So Snape's been treating you well?" Ron gestured with his hand to Harry and in response he raised an eyebrow. "You know, not torturing you and stuff? You look loads better actually." Ron's ears went red and Harry got a feeling that Ron was trying to say something.

"Yeah, he has been good. I even have a bedtime." Harry rolled his eyes. Ron's eyes went wide and then said. "Oh man, that is torture, especially to a wizard who is of age."

"Well, it is reality but it isn't all that bad. I have to be in bed by 11, homework done and all. At least that is what I think he means."

"Oh well, you sure look better under his care." Ron said carefully.

"You think me incapable of taking care of myself?" Harry raised an eyebrow.

"Mate, I lived with you for years, I _know _you need and deserve somebody to look out for you." Harry didn't know what to say to that and Ron's ears were bright red as he said softly. "Look, Harry, what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry for the way I responded. I was in a bad state and…"

"I know, it isn't easy when you lose somebody you love." Harry tried to keep his voice level. Ron shook his head as he said.

"It doesn't excuse the fact that I was a right ass and I apologize for that."

"You were right, you were an ass."

Ron laughed and clasped him on the shoulder and finally Harry could feel himself smiling, a genuine smile and he had the courage to look up at his master to see that Snape regarded him and gave him a nod and as peace flooded him, Harry knew Snape was pleased with him and that feeling was making him feel better than he had done in a long time.

Hp

Severus growled low in his throat when he saw Ginevra Weasley literally pounce on his apprentice. He had told Potter in explicit terms, well maybe not so explicit, that he was not to form any commitment. Beside him, Minerva made a disgusted sound in the back of her throat.

"I hadn't expected Miss Weasley to be quite so tactile."

"She was licking off my apprentice. That'll cost points." He snarled, unsure if he was more disgusted by the display or Potter's enthusiasm.

"I doubt that'll be necessary, Severus, Just look." He followed Minerva's pointed look, half hoping to find the opportunity to give his apprentice a good tongue lashing and make the brat feel miserable for the little stunt he had pulled with the bracelet. Instead he saw Ginevra Weasley storming away from Potter after a row of words.

"Well, that changes things." He merely said.

"I am sure there will be other opportunities for you to take points this evening." Minerva said consolingly as she patted his arm.

"And that is supposed to console me how exactly?" He hissed back. The bantering reminds him of old times, before the war happened and he was made Headmaster and managed to alienate everybody because he was forced to keep his role as spy intact.

He looked around the Great Hall. Students cast uncertain glances towards him and some just ignored him, sitting in the very room where the Dark Lord had been defeated and looked lost and out of place.

"Where are the first years or is Hagrid still guiding them across the lake?" He asked instead, glancing at the patchy hat that was sitting on the stool, apparently silent. There was no nervous and excited energy around the hat this time which was strange. Normally one could feel the energy the hat displayed on the eve of sorting.

"There are no first years for another month. They'll come when the rest of the upper years have settled in and we can fully turn our attention to the education of the young and bright minds of the newest magic generation." Minerva said stiffly.

Severus frowned but he didn't say anything. This term would be hard enough without having the normal cheeky first years seek his attention. His dark gaze sought out the other students, Draco Malfoy was in his seat, refusing to look up at him and meet his eyes.

The boy looked even worse than he did when he was ordered to kill Dumbledore. Whiteness does not become Draco, Severus decided. "Who is Malfoy's tutor?" He asked.

Minerva lips thinned as she said, taking a sip of her wine. "I am."

"But I thought you're Granger's tutor." He said surprised.

"I am. I am hoping that they can both help each other with overcoming their differences and Draco needs all the help he can get trying to get his life back in order, especially with his father in Azkaban and his mother under house arrest and under suspicion from the Ministry."

"But why do you have two students under your wing and now me? I am qualified enough to look after the Slytherins." Severus wasn't sure what he was feeling, but it wasn't anger or frustration. It was distrust that she didn't trust him enough to….

"Because you have your hands full with Harry." She merely said, looking him in the eye and reminding him of her animagus form. Severus' head turned back to regard Potter when Granger stormed out. He wasn't the only member of staff that raised strange eyebrows at this.

"It seems that your apprentice is in disagreement with the female population today." Fillius' voice was soft and Severus glanced at Potter's messy head. Potter's magic hummed against his skin, a mere echo of the younger male's magic. Potter was upset and he had reason to be, even if Severus couldn't understand the words that had been spoken between Weasley, Granger and his apprentice.

He rose from the table as Minerva said. "I've yet to give my speech, Severus."

"I am sure you can do it without me holding your hand. I need to sort out my apprentice."

"But Harry hasn't done anything, Severus." Flitwick cried and Severus growled.

"I know. I'm not a blind dunderhead and I am more than capable of handling my apprentice. The bloody boy needs looking after."

He was already down the steps even before he realized what he'd said but no amount of embarrassment could contain him from doing his job as a master.

Hp

Harry stared at the empty plate in front of him. He'd lost all appetite since his fight with Hermione. Ron's apology had made him feel better but all he wanted to do was to go to Gryffindor Tower to be alone. But the tower would be off limit since Hermione and Ginny were no doubt crying in each other's arms about what a bastard he was.

Ron's elbow hit him in the side and Harry shifted a little on the bench. "Harry!" Ron hissed and Harry looked up to see that the whole table had frozen, staring down at the end where Snape was watching them, scowling darkly.

Harry sat up a little straighter before Snape drawled. "To me, Potter!"

Harry frowned, what had he done now? The magic on the bracelet soothed over his skin and Snape jerked with his head toward the entrance hall and then held out a slender hand and said. "I thought I did not need to repeat myself, to me, Mr. Potter."

Exchanging a confused look with Ron, Harry rose and followed Snape out of the Great Hall. He hurried to catch up with the long strides of his master and finally fell into step beside Snape, who didn't slow down. Harry kept silent, waiting for the older wizard to speak and finally Snape turned to him, arms crossed over the broad chest to glower down at Harry.

"Miss Weasley and Miss Granger saw reason to pick a fight with you today, why was that?"

Harry shuffled his feet and flushed. A part of him wanted to tell Snape that it was none of his sodding business but another part of him wanted to confide in the older wizard. He sighed, ran a hand through his hair and said. "Ginny wasn't happy with the way I reacted to her kiss or my lack of reaction and Hermione wasn't happy with the way I treated Ginny."

"You are aware that I've not given consent for your commitment with Miss Weasley."

"Yeah, I know, sir." Harry looked away.

"I've no problem with your liaison with Miss Weasley but should you wish it, and while I strongly advice against being dishonest in a relationship, I can…withhold my consent until you sort yourself out, Potter."

Harry's gaze snapped up to meet the dark eyes as he asked. "You mean it?"

"Yes, should you express a profound wish to be in a committed relationship with anybody, I'll give my consent, unless I see reason that the relationship is harmful. I however, will not give my consent when you fight with your girlfriend as Miss Weasley so helpfully pointed out."

Harry didn't even know why he was suddenly beaming but he had a hard time to hold his grin. "Of course, sir."

"Therefore, you'll tell me, Potter, if you wish to be in a relationship with Miss Weasley at this point or I should withhold my consent so you've got time to sort yourself out further and focus on your studies."

"Uhm…could you withhold your consent for a while, sir? Just until I've had some time to think." Harry looked up into the dark eyes.

"Of course, Mr. Potter. I shall have my owl deliver a note to Miss Weasley to inform her of my wishes and our agreement, which goes beyond all commitments except those of marriage or engagement made prior to our apprenticeship." Snape gave Harry a nod and as Harry watched his master stalk away, he couldn't help but think that he had done well in choosing Snape as his master for Snape did look out for him.

**That is it for now. I hope you liked it. Review of course. **

**Next chapter: His first day of class and will his restored reputation do him any good or will the students refuse to believe Severus? Can he teach them Defense against the Dark Arts or will the students refuse to be taught by a former Death Eater? Will the relationship between Harry and Ginny grow colder now that Snape had refused to give consent or will Ginny try to defy the rules? That and more in: managing. **


	10. Managing

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: thanks for the reviews and for the patience with my long updates :P. Let's begin.**

"HARRY JAMES POTTER!" Harry wasn't the only one in the Gryffindor common room that jumped a foot in the air when the almost banshee like cry came from up the stairs. All heads turned towards the fireplace where Harry was sitting with Ron, playing a game of chess.

Harry merely sighed loudly, so much for a peaceful evening before the term started. He shared a glance with Ron before his best friend said. "Sorry, mate, for the sake of family relationships, you're on your own."

"Geez, thanks, Ron, I'll remember it next time when Hermione nags you again."

"You've got Snape as a tutor, surely you can handle Ginny."

"I think that Snape may be part of the problem."

It was all Harry could say as the red-haired female stormed downstairs, murder in her pretty brown eyes. Harry merely raised an eyebrow, he had assumed that the fact that she had been ignoring him when he had come back to the common room after the welcoming feast had told him enough of her feelings, but apparently she still wanted to have an audience when they spoke together.

He regarded her coolly, he had not taste for further words and accusations today even when he couldn't deny a little bit of curiosity when he saw the piece of parchment she was clenching in her fist. Could it really be Snape's letter? That would be very quick, even for the older wizard.

Would Snape just send the letter for Harry's sake or simply because he wanted to gloat to cause his apprentice to break up with his girlfriend? It was hard enough to try and figure out Snape's motives on any given day and yet sometimes, Harry couldn't shake the feeling that his master was still doing some things because he hated Harry.

But that would be stupid right. Why would Snape have even considered him as an apprentice then if he hated Harry? It didn't make any sense. The older wizard couldn't be looking after him because of some messed up sense of duty. Their debts had been paid, at least Harry thought so.

"How do you explain this?" Even her voice was cold as she held out the piece of parchment, crumbled up as Harry stared at it, making no move to take it out of her hand as he asked.

"And what should I be explaining?"

Her eyes flashed and for a brief moment her hand trembled while her eyes narrowed and she spat, reading

"_Miss__ Weasley, it has come to my attention that you are in a relationship with my apprentice, Harry James Potter but this commitment has been made without my knowledge. Because of the nature of the apprentice bond between Mr. Potter and myself, no other commitments or engagements that were not made prior to our agreement can exist without my consent. If you can give proof of any engagement prior to my apprenticeship with Mr. Potter, I will gladly give my consent but as for this moment, it is withheld. This means that any relationship that is between you and Mr. Potter is of as this moment unacceptable. Failure to follow the rules will result in points taken and detentions served with me. With regards, S .Snape."_

Her eyes were narrowed in anger but Harry merely looked up at her face. He was aware of the whispered conversation around him but he didn't care. He had been the one to tell Snape that he didn't mind that his master withheld his consent for a little while, at least until Harry could figure out what he wanted.

"And when were you planning on telling me about _this_?" Ginny gestured angrily towards the piece of paper and Harry merely cocked his head to the side as he said.

"With your arrival it slipped my mind. Besides, it isn't that big of a deal…"

"Not that big of a deal?" She echoed, seeming to grow angrier with each passing syllable. "You realize that git is deciding over our future together? Or doesn't it matter to you?"

"Look Ginny, it is in the apprenticeship document that I signed. Apparently until the year has passed, I cannot form any other commitments or relationships."

"So if we had been engaged, this wouldn't have happened?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Harry got a cold feeling in the pit of his stomach at the word married. He wasn't even so sure he wanted to be married to Ginny any longer, especially if she was behaving like that. What had happened to the level headed, sweet girl he had known back in his sixth year?

_She hasn't __seen the things she has seen or lost her brother recently. Be honest with her, she deserves that much… _

His thoughts were confusing him. Harry knew that at the moment he was too much of a mess himself to help other people. It was hard enough to focus on his own studies with Snape, his duties as an apprentice and trying to focus on whatever state his mind was in and he knew he couldn't take it as well if he had to help other people through their hurt as well.

It was maybe one of the reasons he had to break up with Ginny or at least take a break. She was hurt as well and she needed somebody with who she could share this with, to help her through it. She deserved that much and Harry knew that at this moment the role wasn't for him, he couldn't be the dedicated boyfriend that she needed. The attentive one that could open his heart and soul to her to pour it all out, he had never been that one.

He had always kept his hurt bottled up inside and dealt with it on his own, even Snape as his master had yet to cross the line to order Harry to talk to him. While Harry knew that one of Snape's duties demanded that his master look out for his emotional and mental state as well and while Snape had made the offer that his office door was always open to Harry, Harry had yet to take him up on it.

It seemed that Snape was as uncomfortable as Harry was with discussing feelings and emotions but Harry knew it was just a matter of time before the issue was addressed by Snape, as brusque as the man may be, he did not have a gentle manner when it came to things that mattered to Harry. The older wizard preferred to ignore them or waltz over them.

Harry sighed, had the Dursleys really destroyed that much in him or was it simply his incapability to love? Was that the reason he was practically bolting at any closeness with Ginny? Snape would no doubt get to the root of the problem within no time and then dismiss it with a sneer.

Harry shuddered, he didn't want to even think about when that time came when Snape would sit him down for a heart to heart chat, no better to focus on the shallow day to day matters, Harry would deal with everything else himself. He nodded; yes he was good at that.

"So then why haven't you asked me to marry you? I'm sure that we can elope now." Ginny's manner seemed to change completely as she moved closer to him, smiling sweetly at him and making Harry even more uncomfortable. She was asking him to break the document he had signed with Snape and that was even more distressing.

He grew angry, how dare she? How dare she even think such a thing, let alone ask this of him? Who did she think she was to demand such a thing? This was the one thing that he had going for him, his one chance to prove to somebody that he was a person in his own right with his own merits and errors and to have somebody looking out for him. Snape had finally given him a chance without once looking at his fame, his glory and whatever other nonsense the public bestowed upon him, no Snape had Harry Potter as his apprentice and Harry would burn in hell before he would muck it up, Ginny or no Ginny.

He would prove to Snape that he was worth the older wizard's time and patience that he was going to make Snape proud. It didn't matter what anybody else would think of Harry but all he wanted was for somebody to be proud, even if that man was an impossible git that hated his guts and loathed his parents.

His eyes narrowed and he snapped. "Have you perhaps conveniently forgotten that little note that is in your hand? The one telling you we can't get married until after the apprenticeship is over."

"What Snape doesn't know won't hurt him." Ginny leaned in closer.

"I refuse to break the rules, Ginny!" Harry snapped. It was making him so very angry that she demanded this of him.

"So that is the only reason you won't marry me? Because of Snape's rules?" Ginny sneered out the name but she appeared hopeful. Harry felt like cursing himself. He lowered his voice, aware of the people that had lowered their voices to hear more of their conversation.

Harry cast a quick glance towards Ron but he knew he wasn't getting any help from that corner because his friend had grabbed the nearest book, not caring that he was holding it upside down as he sought to escape and not get involved in their argument.

"No and because we are too young. I want to finally live my life a little, Ginny before I settle down and start a family. I want to go travelling and do some things I enjoy. I know that everybody is expecting great things from me when I finish with Hogwarts but truly, I may be interested in pursuing other studies."

"You just like it because Snape is showing you now. I'm sure it will pass when the apprenticeship is finished and you can go back to being an auror like you are meant to."

Rage seemed to infuse Harry suddenly. How dare she dismiss him like that? She just dismissed him like whatever he wanted didn't matter to anybody, like it was expected of him to become an auror. In truth Harry wanted to do anything but become an auror. He was sick of that life.

"Stop dismissing me like a small child! I'm a person in my own right with my own wishes and thoughts, I'm sorry if that doesn't work with your perfect picture of our life together, marrying straight out of Hogwarts, would you like me to get you pregnant on a time table as well?" He growled, standing up.

She flinched, backing away from him before she said. "I would love it if you shared that picture with me, but why are you so reluctant to marry?"

"Because I'm too young. What in 10 years from now, I find out that you may not be the one for me and I married you on a whim and youthful passion. If I make that vow, I want to honor it and make it mean something!"

"What are you saying?" Ginny choked out, clenching the letter to her chest.

"That our relationship has always been pressured. I want to take the time to truly get to know you without any pressure from the outside world or your family." Harry finally finished. He was sure that he didn't want to marry her anytime soon. He wanted to fall in love, roam the world, and not be tied down like his parents had been by a war and children that were born so soon.

He had plenty of time later to marry, sire children and get a job he loved. He wanted to continue his studies and be with somebody who supported him for who he was and who loved him for who he was and who didn't condemn the choices he had made, was that really so much to ask?

"I'm sure it isn't the only reason your _master _isn't giving his consent!" Ginny finally snapped and Harry glanced up, confused.

"What on earth are you babbling about?"

"Isn't it obvious, Snape is jealous! He is afraid of a little competition for his young lover." Harry realized his mouth had fallen open with her absurd notion. What the hell was she saying? Ron was also staring at his sister with a confused and shocked expression on his face, his pretence at reading completely forgotten.

"Lover? Who the hell is Snape's lover?"

"Isn't it obvious? You are! You are in a relationship with Snape!" Despite the audacity of the claim that Ginny was laying, Harry couldn't help but burst out laughing, the idea was so ridiculous.

He gasped for breath, holding his sides in laughter until tears streaming down his face. Snape and him lovers? He in a relationship with his master? It was mad.

Ginny had her hands on her hips in a very good imitation of her mother as she hissed. "It is so very clear, Harry! The one moment you hate him and then suddenly you are his apprentice, it so clear. So when did this happen? Did he make his move when you were at Hogwarts or was it before that? Did you give him blow jobs in the hospital bed because he was unable to attend to things himself? You should have told somebody, Harry. This kind of behavior is wrong!"

"And what kind of behavior is that, Ginny? Snape's behavior to me has been impeccable. He could have done all sorts of things but he didn't. He had every right and every opportunity to belittle me and to put me down but he never has. He has been taking care of me and you just can't stand that I now know the truth about him."

"It doesn't change what he did, Harry. He is a murderer."

"So am I!" Harry shouted, he didn't care that his voice seemed to break as all the guilty feelings threatened to overwhelm him. He pushed them back down; Ginny had no right to say these things.

He may not like Snape any better than he did before but he owed Snape a lot, not in the least bit about how he was feeling now. His hand unconsciously traced the bracelet as he felt the powerful magic from his master flashing over his skin.

"Well, it seems like kind seeks out kind, doesn't it?" She spat and Harry felt his face heat up even as his insides turn to ice. There were shocked whispers in the common room and even before Harry could respond, she coldly said. "But don't worry, we don't have any _permission _so I really shouldn't be too worried about who you sleep with, right?"

She then smiled coolly and walked away, leaving a numb Harry in her wake and a whispering common room.

Hp

"Harry? Mate?" Ron's voice was not welcoming as Harry placed his burning face in his pillow. He wished the ground could swallow him whole or at least make him disappear for a while but then the curtains were yanked open and Ron stood beside him, saying. "Come on, mate, stop sulking and talk to me!"

"I have every right to sulk, Ron! Unless you just weren't present for the conversation where your sister accused me of having a relationship with Snape, my mentor and master! Oh and the fact that she just accused me of being a murderer, instead of trying to tell me it was alright what I've done. I really don't need people making me feel guilty about what happened back here in May, I'm doing a fine enough job on my own…"

"So you aren't…" Ron trailed off and Harry looked up, green eyes narrowed in anger and the already messy hair standing up even more than usual.

"I'm not what?" Harry spat, daring his friend to finish the sentence.

"Snape's lover?" Ron's voice was a whisper but it didn't shake.

"Of course not! Do you have any idea how wrong that is? He is my mentor and my master and while the bond between us may grow closer, it isn't like I suddenly fell in love with the git simply because he takes care of me! Is that what kind of person you think I am? Just falling in love with the first person who takes care of me and who…." Harry was ranting but he couldn't stop as all the pent up feeling of frustration bubbled over.

"Of course not, mate." Ron said soothingly, holding up a hand before he said. "But you know, if you were…I mean, falling in love with a bloke, that would be perfectly alright. It wouldn't matter to me at all, just as long…uhm, a long as it wasn't me or Hermione, or maybe even Malfoy, or Filch, or well, maybe even Snape but as long as you're happy, mate then…."

"Ron, what are you saying?" Harry was sure his voice sounded as shaky as he felt.

"Well, you know if you are gay or I mean, even attracted to both boys and girls, well, I would be perfectly fine with it."

"You… would?" This time his voice sounded unsteady and hopeful, so hopeful that Harry nearly winced. He had no idea if what Ron was saying was true or not but he just…just knowing that there was somebody out there who accepted and loved him for who he was made his breathing suddenly exhilarate.

"Yeah, like I said, as long as it isn't me or Hermione, it is fine with me. Just as long as you're happy." Ron smiled, still bright red and Harry swallowed thickly. He turned his eyes away, knowing that he was going to blurt out something entirely inappropriate or unmanly if he kept looking at Ron.

"Uhm…thanks, Ron…"

"Sure, mate; it is what friends are for." Harry could hear how uncomfortable Ron was as his best friend remembered the last couple of months when Ron had been angry with him. Now it was his best female friend who seemed angry with him.

Did she think the same as Ginny? That Harry was Snape's lover?

Harry frowned, was that what everybody was thinking? Surely the story would go around the school tomorrow when everybody in Gryffindor Tower had seen him flee like a little girl after Ginny had left. He sighed; this was going to cause more trouble, hell, like he needed any more.

Hp

The morning of the first day of classes was always a hard affair for both students and teachers. This remarkable year was not unlike any other but as Severus Snape stared moodily at his reflection in the bathroom mirror; he knew that everything had changed.

Gone was the sallow complex and greasy hair he had always had, the same with the nearly frightening scowl he had worn nearly all his life, it was all replaced by a pale, nearly sickly colour, his hair was clean washed for once because he hadn't even been near a cauldron in the past 24 hours and his dark eyes were probing his own face to search for any resemblance of the strong man who never needed aid underneath the uncertain one that stared back at him.

Often in his youth he had the same look when he was being honest with himself, and that wasn't often. The very first time that he was to appear as a teacher, newly instated as a Potions Master at his first and only home, fresh from his Death Eater days and trial and only four years since he had graduated from Hogwarts to return as a teacher had he looked the same as he did now.

But oh how things had changed.

Back in those days Severus still allowed himself to dream of a future with love, companionship, research and other wonderful things, in truth, a real future. He would rise from the blemish that the wrong choice he had made in his youth brought with it. He would be respected for his keen mind, not for what he had done.

How wrong and foolish he had been. He had almost been thinking like a Gryffindor. Hadn't he lived even then long enough to know that there were no such things as second chances? Nobody ever granted him a second chance, except for the ones he didn't need or want, such as some of his old _friends. _

And now, what did he have to show for it?

"Nothing, I'm a man scorned for who he is and what he has accomplished. I'm a murder at the age of 38, murdering the only man that could keep me safe and give me a safe haven. Forced to do the bidding of not one but two mad wizards and betrayed by both and trusted by none. No friends, no relationships and no research or brilliant project that I can safely sign to my name without the outside world falling over their feet in their hurry to disgrace me even further. "

It wasn't unlike him for his voice to sound so bitter but Severus sighed, fingers running through his hair. Why was he doing this to himself? He should pack up and leave, there surely was some better place for him where he could be valued and appreciated like he deserved. He could make an honest and decent living for himself, not being shunned and belittled of what he had done in the past.

He had nothing left here, all his dreams, hopes and desires were shattered and who truly needed a bitter shell of a man who did not even care for himself to have the courage to change his future? Anything was better than his bleak prospect of the future that awaited him here in Britain.

He sighed again; he had to wait because at the moment he couldn't do much except go through each day one day at a time. His wounds were too dire and he was too notorious to disappear at this moment. He would first need to get his bearings and see what was left of his belongings and funding and think of a plan before he could even remotely consider anything as stupid as leaving everything he had ever known behind.

_And there is Potter to consider…._

Severus sighed louder this time. He had promised Potter a year and while he may not be many things, he knew he could not abandon Potter. _I made an apprenticeship master bond with him. It would do nothing to my credit as a Potions Master of the Guild to abandon my promise. I'll teach him my craft and lore for a year, regardless of how much it may cost me. _

Potions were everything to him and his reputation as a Potions Master was unblemished and Severus longed to keep it that way. He did not have much going for him and this was the one thing that he would not allow anybody to take from him.

He straightened his shoulders, he would need to teach the second years today and while Defense against the Dark Arts may hold his interest, he would be damned if the students found any fault him in him today. He just needed one moment to put the fear in them again and while his reputation may succeed in spite of his personal appearance, he would show them that they needed to fear Severus Snape for a detention was never far off as long as he prowled the corridors of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry.

_If only prowling wasn't so hard at the moment_Severus thought wearily.

Hp

The first day at school for Harry was always an affair that was both annoying and relieving. It was annoying because there was a whole new year full of students that stared at him in awe, nudging their friends and whispering that Harry Potter was here. It was a relief because it meant that the summer had ended and he could escape the Dursleys for another year but this time…this time it was hell.

Every student that was currently enrolled in Hogwarts looked at Harry the moment he entered either way the Great Hall for breakfast, walked the corridor to the bathroom or went to his first class. At first Harry tried to ignore it but he found it harder and harder more students he passed that were whispering behind their hands, judging him, wishing to know what had happened all those months during the long summer break and just how powerful he was.

Clenching his fist and trying to stay polite as Harry maneuvered through the student packed corridor for his first class of the semester, Charms, he found that he may not get through the day and the nighttime lesson with Snape without hexing somebody.

He growled as he moved through the students that stood still in the corridors, staring at him. He should have stayed in the dormitory but the fact that Snape would no doubt come storming up the moment he found out that Harry hadn't gone to class wouldn't really be worth the trouble with his master, especially with the irritation he was currently feeling.

He rounded another corner, just a few more corridors and then he could sit down in his own classroom, with his own year mates and finally lose himself in the complicity of whatever Flitwick wanted to teach them the first class of the year.

He sighed; he really hoped that this wouldn't occur the whole year because he was sure to hex some students then, regardless of any rumors that may be spread about them.

"Will you look at that?"

"Good gracious, they are eating each other up."

"It is disgusting."

"Is that…Weasley and…who is that?"

"It is that Thomas boy from Gryffindor."

"But I thought that she was going out with Potter?"

"Perhaps he wasn't satisfying her enough. It may be all talk with that boy and nothing else, if you catch my meaning." There were even giggles and Harry frowned. What were they talking about?"

"Come on move! We need to pass." Ron pushed some of the students out of the way, before he muttered underneath his breath at Harry. "I wonder what they're all staring and talking about. It must be pretty good. Perhaps it is a fight or…"

Ron fell silent as his mouth fell open when two students that had been standing in front of them moved away, allowing Harry to finally see what they were all so busy gossiping about. His mouth opened in a silent scream of rage as his heart thundered heavily in his chest. _How dare she!?_

Ginny was standing there, her arms tightly around Dean Thomas who had bent his head in order to kiss her passionately. It didn't seem to matter to them that everybody was watching, that Harry was watching as Ginny moaned and moved her hands, displaying them in places that the public shouldn't be seeing.

"Oi, Ginny!" Ron bellowed, stepping forward. Ginny broke away, wiping her lips before they eased into a smile. Harry didn't even have to look at his best friend to know that Ron was red in the face as Dean took a step back.

He didn't even know what he was feeling. This wasn't real, it wasn't happening. Yeah, sure they had broken up but why was Ginny already kissing somebody else this passionately. Was she trying to make him jealous or what?

"I thought you loved Harry and here you are kissing somebody else!" Harry's head snapped to Ron when he heard his name.

Ginny's eyes narrowed in anger and her pretty face turned red as she hissed. "His _master _made it quite clear that it was over between us so why should I stay behind and weep when he has never spared a single thought for me when he was fucking Snape!"

Gasps went around the corridor and Harry could feel his eyes sting with angry tears. He could feel his magic rising because of his rage. He knew that Ginny's love for him had always been unrealistic but she didn't have to vent out her anger on him. It wasn't right.

"I told you before; I'm not Snape's lover."

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Harry!" She spat.

"Just like you keep telling yourself that you loved only me when you screwed around with all the Gryffindors in your year and above?" Harry could have slapped himself but the words just slipped out of his mouth without thinking.

Ginny paled and stepped back as if slapped and Ron opened his mouth a few times, but no words were forthcoming, so shocked he was. "Now, Harry, this really isn't necessary." Dean stepped forward, displaying his hands and trying to keep the peace.

"Was I just another notch on your broom, Ginny? The one conquest you couldn't win and when you finally did you grew tired of it? How is it to be known as the Gryffindor whore? One day you have this boyfriend and then the next day another…"

"What would you know of relationships, Harry? You use somebody else to break up with me. And besides, for you to be another notch on my broom we would actually have to do something else besides kissing, but I guess that you aren't man enough to try and live up to your reputation. Well, I'll be sure to tell all the girls that with you, it was all talk and nothing else. They can keep dreaming because in truth, you're a nightmare."

His breathing sped up but Ginny wasn't finished. She stepped closer, her lips twisting in a faint sneer before she hissed. "You're a lousy boyfriend. You're so needy and independent. It is like fucking a locked door for all the good it did me. You never opened up and when you did, it was always Malfoy or Snape you couldn't shut up about. You are the most selfish person that I've ever met. You always speak about yourself, never about others. Poor orphaned Harry Potter…. Well guess what, I don't need you! I don't see anybody who does! Everybody who ever loved you is dead and I'm sure that they are glad. You never knew why Sirius or Remus, or even my parents never asked you to come and live with them? It was because they knew you. You're like a Dementor, sucking all the happiness from somebody's soul and never giving anything back. You just take and take, because that is how big the hole in your heart is and nobody can ever fill it up without being hurt themselves. Who could ever love somebody like that?"

_Freak…unwanted burden….unlovable boy…._

Harry tried not to show any emotion. It was what he had been taught and it seemed like a stroke of luck that the bracelet heated against his skin. He took a deep breath and swallowed, hoping that Snape hadn't been alarmed by what was going on.

He brushed back his sleeve, glancing down at the snake that was showing a green color. Snape had need of him. Glad for the distraction, Harry turned as he muttered to Ron. "Tell Flitwick I had to go and assist Snape. He is calling me…."

"Yeah, he probably wants somebody to go down on his knees for him, the greasy and disgusting git!" And as Harry clenched his fist, he tried to ignore Ginny as he walked away, even when he couldn't deny the hurt inside of him that only grew at her comments.

Hp

Severus could hear the soft murmur of the students as he paused outside the door. He had summoned Potter five minutes ago, where was the blasted brat? He growled impatiently, this would reflect badly on him.

The first bell hadn't rang yet but Severus liked to make a grand entrance, especially today of all days. This was the first time that these second years had him as their teacher and Severus would need to establish his rule quickly lest the students run amok.

Quick footsteps came around the corner and finally Potter appeared, looking red faced and panting.

"What kept you, boy?" Severus gestured for Potter to come closer as his apprentice held himself up by the wall why he caught his breath.

"I was in the Charm's corridor on the way to my first lesson, which I'm going to miss now…" Potter answered, panting

"This is more important." Severus dismissed the notion of Potter's other lessons. The apprenticeship went above all other classes and Potter already knew what was being covered in class today. He was better off with Severus here in this class where they could make use of Potter's expertise and his own then someplace the brat would only disrupt the lesson because he was stared at. At least this time he would stun the young students into silence as he stood next to his master at the front of the class.

"Come on, in you get." Severus gestured impatiently. Potter glanced up, green eyes narrowed behind the dirty glasses.

"What do you mean, sir?"

"You're going to help me teach this class today…."

"But this is Defense…"

"Yes, you did defeat a dark lord, didn't you? You know all about defense against the dark arts, at least more than your average student. Now in you get."

"That is why you summoned me?" Potter seemed amazed and then his eyes narrowed. "Surely that can't be the only thing. My apprenticeship is one of Potions, not DADA."

Severus drew closer, pulling himself up to his full height; he had no time to play games with Potter. He sneered. "By the document I've to teach you my craft and lore and part of my craft is teaching. Therefore you'll observe while I teach this class and participate when I ask you to participate. Is that understood?"

"You want me to stand in front of the class with you?" Potter asked, pulling his classes off and tapping them with his wand to clean them. Finally, some of his manners were starting to rub off on the boy, Severus noticed with a smirk.

"Exactly. Glad to have you catching on so quickly. Now in you go." Severus held open the door and stepped back, hearing the noise level in the classroom go down immediately. Potter cast him a glare and then squared his shoulders, stepping towards the open door as he took a deep breath.

Severus fought his glee and then rested a hand on the brat's shoulders, ignoring the faint flinch Potter couldn't suppress. Severus frowned for a moment. _Why does Potter always wince and flinch when somebody touches him and he doesn't suspect it?_

_It is something that I've to find out, among other things._

He pushed the brat in and whispered, knowing that he needed his apprentice angry enough to be on his guard. "And that is ten points from Gryffindor for running in the corridors, Potter…"

And as Potter's shoulder tensed underneath his hand, Severus pushed his apprentice into the classroom to face the no doubt unruly students.

**That is it for now. I hope you liked. So how should the students respond when our heroes enter? Review of course and sorry for the delay in updates. **

**The next chapter: Harry and Severus stand in front of the class together but will it go as they think or will the students surprise them and force them to work together? Or will Harry finally be able to get some of his anger out as he duels his master? And afterwards, when Snape forces Harry to talk, will our chosen one confide or resist? And what does Draco Malfoy want from Harry Potter? That and more in: Forced. **


	11. Forced

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter, sadly enough. **

**Note: Thank you so much for the reviews. I'm very glad that you all liked the chapter. Well and truth be told, it was fun to break Ginny and Harry up but let's begin.**

Harry took a deep breath as he was forced into the Defense classroom by Snape's firm hand on his shoulder. He rolled his shoulders, hoping to push Snape's hand off but the older wizard refused to take a hint. Harry bit his lip, biting back a growling and a scratching comment just in time because a sudden stillness descended upon the classroom.

It was followed by whispers as Harry forced his gaze anywhere but the second years that were staring at him, whispering behind their hands and to their neighbors. The classroom was furnished with all the same desks that had always stood there but the desk and the blackboard had been raised on a small platform and sunlight streamed in.

Unlike in Harry's sixth year when Snape had been defense teacher as well there were no horrible pictures up on the wall with people in various stages of Dark Magic. Harry was glad, he wasn't entirely sure if he could stomach that after the Final Battle.

He went back to trying to shrug Snape's hand away as he hissed behind him. "Let go!"

"What was that, Potter?" The silky voice whispered behind him, menacingly low and Harry glared over his shoulder at the dark robed teacher. Snape's lips had curled into a smirk but Harry was not so easily distracted as he said.

"I said let go of me, _sir_." He stressed out the last word and he bit back a yowl when Snape's hand tightened for a fraction in a painful grip as his master hissed.

"Show some respect!"

"Only to those who deserve it!" Harry knew it was a low blow but he had never liked people touching him to hurt him. The only time that the Dursleys had touched him had been to harm him or to force him into doing something and Harry had promised himself that he would never stand for it again.

His mood was already at a low point because of the fights with Ginny and the rumors which were even now spreading through the school like the plague. He really didn't need any of Snape's difficult lessons now, at least not before he had a time to calm himself.

He was suddenly released roughly and pushed into the room, causing him to stumble. He managed to catch himself in time from slamming his face open on the nearest desk as he turned to rub at his shoulder, eyes narrowed in a glare towards the tall Professor.

Snape brushed past him roughly, not seeming to care that he pushed against Harry's shoulder rudely as he went to the front of the class. Harry crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at the floor, chewing his lips. What the hell was he doing here?

The students looked between Harry and Snape, still whispering behind their hands. Harry leaned against the empty desk behind him, for a brief moment wondering what the students were whispering about but a moment later he knew he didn't care. There would always be whispers about him and truth be told he was fed up with it.

"My name is Professor Severus Snape. I teach both Defense Against the Dark Arts and Potions…." Snape began, his voice harsh and filling the classroom.

"Once you practiced Dark Arts." Harry shot a glare towards the students who were whispering but Snape's voice cracked like a whip, leaving the students quivering in their seat.

"It should fall to your instructor to have experience in the subject he instructs in. Be glad that it was me who sold his soul for practicing Dark Arts rather than force you to sell your own for some experience! Now, I will have silence when I lecture! Though today we will have a demonstration instead of a lecture."

Harry glowered at the smirk that Snape threw his way as the older wizard drew his cloak tighter about himself by crossing his arms over his chest. He looked away, pretending not to be interested in the way Snape's presence was rattling his nerves. He only had an idea of what Snape could do to him and it wasn't a feeling he liked.

He clenched his fist, refusing to show how much effort it was costing him from not reaching for his wand. His master could be a right unfair bastard when it came to dueling and Harry had fought against Snape enough to know how quick the older wizard was with his wand.

"So therefore I present to you, your very own celebrity, live in hero and in the flesh, however small and diminishing he may seem because I'm sure that the tales are much more thrilling, Harry Potter." Snape gestured towards Harry and as his insides glowered with anger, Harry approached his master, murder in his steps.

Hp

The green eyes flashed with anger as Potter fixed him with a glare. Severus brushed it off with a smirk and gestured for Potter to approach the dais. _Foolish child, did you think simply because you're my apprentice that I shall not belittle you and put you in your place? The fame clearly has gone to your disfigured head._

His lips curled into a satisfying smile as Potter's magic, tense like its owner brushed over his skin. _Let's see what Potter can make from a duel when he isn't thinking clearly. I will proof once and for all that luck was always on his side and it wasn't skill that saved the brat time and time again._

He rotated his wrist, feeling the bracelet slide against his sleeve but he paid no mind to it. His sharp gaze shot over the assembled students. Second year Gryffindors, Slytherins, Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs, all thrown together into one big class because to cut each class up meant that the classes would have been only 5 or 4 students a piece.

A wave of his wand sent the teacher desk against the blackboard and added a protective charm over the students. Severus' fingers touched his bracelet as he whispered. _"Protego."_

Potter stumbled as the charm woven over the bracelet that allowed them to communicate with each other added a thin protective layer. Severus knew Potter would not be able to detect the spell he had added over his apprentice. He had no desire to take it easy on the boy but he wouldn't allow the child to come to harm.

"Mr. Potter and myself will give you a quick duel to show you the spells that can be used for combat and protection. Many of these spells are dangerous and are not taught at Hogwarts for various reasons. This is not a dueling club and you will not repeat these spells upon any of your fellow schoolmates. This isn't an excuse to practice upon older years either for if they retaliate, it will be on your heads. Are there any questions?"

One second year of Gryffindor if Severus wasn't mistaken raised his hand. Severus gave a brisk nod and the second year stammered. "Professor, but why did you pick Harry Potter? Is it to prove that you are stronger than the one who vanquished the You Know Who?"

Potter's face was impassive but the green eyes dulled the moment another student shouted. "Yes, Harry Potter rocks! He is far stronger than anybody else and…"

"I beat him because I had help. I wasn't afraid to ask for help my friends and those I cared for…" Potter lost his temper.

"You just had your friends acting as shields." Another student rose and Potter blinked, balling his fists as Severus felt an agonizing wave of magic come from the bracelet. He knew it was a mere echo of the powerful magic of the smaller wizard as it reacted to its owner's pain and emotions.

"I didn't ask them to…."

"Well, 50 people died because you wouldn't give yourself up! You were standing in the Great Hall when he demanded that you show yourself and nobody would come to harm." The same small little witch shouted and Severus realized that she had lost a sister in the battle and her father was in St. Mungo's.

"And you, Miss Smith, are a fool for believing such lies from a Dark wizard?" He cut in silkily. He could see how Potter was trembling but whether it was with rage or something else he didn't know. He took a step forward, fixing the witch in his gaze as he purred. "The Dark Lord has always lied and he would have still harmed and killed students, especially those who come from muggle families."

The young witch paled and Severus sneered. It would not do for the students to riot against Potter. Some of the Gryffindors were throwing dark glances towards the little girl who had dared to question their hero, Severus' lip curled.

He glanced towards his apprentice to see that Potter had not managed to pull himself together any better than before. The green eyes were cast down and something else seemed to occupy Potter's thoughts. Severus' dark eyes narrowed in contemplation. What had gotten his apprentice so distracted?

He cleared his throat softly and then said. "To answer the earlier question before people so rudely interrupted, which will be 5 points from each house for speaking without your turn in class, Mr. Potter is here because he is my apprentice."

Severus sneered out the word and he saw how Potter recoiled. His eyes narrowed, it was almost as if Potter didn't like the way that the name sounded. Potter had a point now, Severus was proud of his apprentice and the tone he was using now was for the benefit of the students but he should have known that the hero of all Gryffindors would take offense at that tone.

"Very well, up here, Potter, we shall begin." He snapped his fingers to add the wards that protected the students. He took his wand from the wand sheath up his wrist and gestured towards Potter as he called to his apprentice.

"Wand at the ready, Potter. You'll take the attacking position and I will defend myself. The spells which you cannot use entitle the unforgivable, those that do damage to the classroom, or the spells that can harm. There will be clear pronunciation of your spells, even though you are capable of nonverbal spells." Severus watched with satisfaction as the brat seemed to tense even further.

He wondered how long it would take before Potter would snap. The brat stared at him with narrowed eyes, power sparkling over his skin but it was so subtle that Severus could barely feel it. He inclined his head, inviting his apprentice to begin.

Hp

_That hateful git!_

Harry had to bite his lip and clench his fist together so tight that it hurt because he was sure that he would lose it. Screw his wand then, he would punch his master.

It was a trying day as it was and he really didn't need Snape's veiled hints that Harry was a useless boy. It was so reminiscent of the Dursleys and especially with the words Ginny had spoken earlier, it seemed almost too much.

Harry forced himself to take a deep breath to try and control his magic but it was no use, he was breathing quickly as he raised his wand and cried out the first spell that came to mind.

"_stupefy!"_

"_Protego!"_

Snape flickered his wand so swiftly and the red beam deflected. Harry jumped away as the beam bounded away from the shield charm that had been cast to protect the students. Many students gasped but Harry had already shouted his next spell.

"_Tarantallegra." _ Snape curled his lip but it only served to infuriate Harry more as he thought.

_Levicorpus_

Harry didn't even see his master's wand move, so quickly was the movement but he knew that the spell had been deflected. Snape sneered at him, black eyes narrowed and furious but Harry merely curled his lip in disdain, it was time that his master remembered who his apprentice was.

"_Locomotor Mortis." _

Harry retorted quickly and Snape barely had the time to strengthen his shield as Harry cried. "_Obscuro."_

He had meant to catch Snape off guard and he did because for a moment a blindfold appeared over the cold black eyes. The students laughed and Harry allowed himself a small breather, grinning quickly. He knew Snape was most likely extremely angry right now but he didn't care. Let's see if the older wizard liked to be ridiculed.

"_Petrificus Totalus" _ Harry could feel his grin freezing on his face as Snape snapped out the spell. The older wizard was breathing heavily as he cancelled the spell Harry had done by removing the blindfold. The dark eyes were showing how truly furious Snape was as he approached Harry, using his wand to hold him up.

Harry would have flinched with the purposeful stride of the older wizard but only his eyes showed how angry he was and probably also how afraid. Snape marched towards him, wand caressing Harry's cheek as he purred.

"You see, class, that you should never relax your guard for even if you think that your opponent is distracted they can still retaliate with an appropriate spell, as I've demonstrated on Mr. Potter." Harry would have bitten his lip or spat at Snape but he could only hope that his eyes showed how he felt.

Snape was so close that Harry could feel the older wizard's warm breath on his cheek. Snape's breath smelled like mint and Snape smirked at him before snapping at the class. "Why don't you all copy that down using Mr. Potter as an example. Surely you still remember the spell we used."

There was a sudden commotion as the students sought for parchments and quills as Snape leaned in to whisper in Harry's ear, voice holding a veiled threat. "One more stunt like that, Mr. Potter and you'll pay! Do not forget who you're dueling!"

Snape pushed Harry away roughly and then walked away, carelessly exposing his back. Harry took it for the insult it was. Snape wasn't afraid of him. Well he would show his _master _who he was messing with.

"_Finite." _Snape cancelled the body bind with a careless flick of his wand over his shoulder and Harry was ready.

"_Sectumsempra!" _ He cried, holding his wand steady. He had no desire to harm Snape but his anger and hatred was so great towards the older wizard right now that he didn't care if he cut Snape's cheek or not.

The Professor spun around so quickly that Harry only had a second to think as Snape brought up his wand to block the spell. His master's face was contorted in fury as Harry felt the powerful wave of magic rush over him and throwing him backwards and down the steps. His head cracked against the stones underneath and the world spun dizzily as Harry fought against the darkness that was etching around his vision.

His head ached from where he had hit the stones and Harry couldn't gather the strength to get up as he heard commotion erupt around him.

Hp

"SILENCE!" Severus roared over the chattering of the students that had approached Potter. He growled low in his throat before he shot sparks in the air to clear the pandemonium that was taking place in the classroom.

It didn't work. The students were upset and Severus snapped, annoying as the bond buzzed in his mind because his apprentice was in pain _because of him_. "Sit down the lot of you, Mr. Potter is fine."

"Sir, he isn't moving."

_Bloody hell, have I managed to do what the Dark Lord tried for nearly a decade to do? Have I managed to kill Potter? Oh damn, Minerva will never forgive me for this._

His heart was hammering in his chest as Severus approached the fallen hero. Potter was on his back, pale in the face as the younger male blinked rapidly. Severus crouched next to his apprentice as his fingers were resting against Potter's neck to check for a pulse as a student whispered loudly.

"Look, now Snape is choking him to make sure that he stays dead. Did you see how hard he hit him?" Severus shot up a glare towards the students still assembled around. Some were actually crying. Potter's pulse was slow and weak sounding to Severus' untrained ears as he slowly asked.

"Potter…Harry, can you hear me? It is Professor Snape." The hazy green eyes shot towards him as Potter moaned.

"I think I'm going to be sick." And promptly did as he said, all over himself and the floor.

Severus cursed loudly.

The students gasped, some giggled and some took notes as to what the Potions Master said and did, you never knew which paper would offer the most money.

Deciding to take pity on Potter, Severus softly said. "_Scourgify." _The sickness disappeared as the smell lingered and Severus grasped Potter by the shoulder. He hauled the boy into a sitting position and braced the brat against his own shoulder as Potter paled even more and closed his eyes in obvious pain.

His other hand stroked the messy hair away to feel the egg sized lump that was growing underneath his hand. He softly muttered a healing spell underneath his breath as he watched Potter breathe easier. The ridged shoulders relaxed against Severus' arm and it was a moment longer till Potter could open his eyes, hazy with shock still but there was no more pain.

"Stay seated if you feel dizzy." He told his apprentice, bracing Potter's hands with his shoulders as he felt the younger male tense. Potter blinked owlishly at the students and Severus could see the color creep into the high cheekbones of the younger man.

The bond stopped buzzing in his mind and Severus stroked a soothing hand through the messy hair. Potter seemed to grow uncomfortably tense as he barely managed to suppress a flinch. Severus' mood soured, so that was the thanks he was getting from the brat for taking care of him? _Saintly Potter doesn't like to be touched by the great and ugly Potions Master…_

After a tense moment Potter relaxed as Severus continued to probe around the tender area. The younger male hissed air out between his teeth the moment Severus' fingers touched the swelling as Severus asked. "Does that hurt?"

"Yes, sir, but it is better than a moment ago."

"Good, if you feel dizzy or faint or this keeps hurting, go and see Madam Pomfrey. Get up, _slowly _and sit down in that chair over there. This lesson has ended."

"Yes, sir." Potter mumbled, as he slowly got to his feet. He swayed for a moment and Severus nearly reached out to wrap an arm around the thin waist of his student when Potter found his balance and slouched over to the chair Severus had pointed him to.

He got to his feet himself and brushed his robes, glancing up and snarling. "What are you all gawking at? Get lost! Class dismissed! Two feet of parchment on successfully shielding against unfriendly spells, to be turned in by next lesson!"

The students scurried away and Severus put the classroom back to order again with a wave of his hand. He turned in Potter's direction as the brat asked. "Sir, can I go to lunch?"

"No, I wish to speak to you."

"Very well…." At Severus' glare, Potter added. "_sir."_

"Not in here, in private you dolt. Unless you wish to discuss intimate things with the rest of the school present?"Severus crossed his arms over his chest.

"The rest of the school will be at lunch." Potter muttered too loudly.

"We will not be joining them. We will be eating lunch in my office." Severus spun on his heel, knowing Potter would follow even when he could feel the glare the boy was sending him through his layer of clothing cutting into his back.

Hp

_Spiteful git_

Harry's mind was churning the way his stomach had done earlier when he had thrown up all over himself. This was the second time in the two months that he had been Snape's apprentice that he had managed to nearly puke all over his master.

He followed at a slower pace because his head still ached with every step he took but it wasn't as bad as it had been when he had just gotten up. His face reddened when he remembered the students that had been present, by lunch the story would no doubt run among the school that Harry had been bested by Snape.

_I wonder what they'll call it. A lover's row perhaps. __But the students just saw another thing I'm obviously a failure at. Perhaps it had been my luck that saved me all those years against Voldemort and not my skill. I had thought that I was finally good at something but I'm just a lowlife freak who can't do anything right._

"Sit!" A slender finger pointed at a chair and Harry bit out.

"The correct answer would be 'you can sit over there, Mr. Potter'" Snape's dark eyes narrowed in a glare as the thin lips pressed tightly together before spitting out one word.

"_Now_!"

Harry remained standing as Snape raised a black eyebrow before pointing silently to the chair that stood before the desk. Harry's eyes narrowed into a glare of their own and Snape smirked as he cocked his head to the side and breathed. "You think you are going to win this, Potter!"

"You're the one who wanted to talk." Harry retorted.

"I have enough of your cheek, boy! If you demand to show me the insolence of a seven year old today then I will see it fit to punish you like a seven year old! I'm not above placing you over my knee for a sound spanking, Mr. Potter."

"You already thrashed me enough today, _sir_." Harry spat out. He pretended that he wasn't shaken up from the way Snape had snarled boy at him. It was too reminiscent of uncle Vernon whenever his uncle decided that a hands on lesson was something Harry required instead of a sound scowling.

Snape's eyes darkened and he muttered quite clearly. "If you think that was a thrashing, Potter, you've never been beaten in your life so much that you feared you may not wake up from it."

"No, only enough times by uncle Vernon and Dudley to know what to do to avoid it." Harry muttered under his breath. The dark eyes shot towards him but Harry could be sure that Snape hadn't heard it. His master hadn't had that good of a hearing, now did he?

"Very well, would you like to take a seat, Mr. Potter, this conversation will take a while? Unless you wish for me to put you over my knee and give you a reason for standing up from meals for a week." Snape's voice was losing the silkiness and just sounded plain dangerous now.

Harry sat down, arranging his robes to better serve his needs and to give him something to do. He loathed Snape.

Snape sat himself down carefully upon the desk, towering over Harry who refused to look up.

"What has gotten you so upset today?" The unexpected question caught him completely off guard and Harry rose to his feet in a rage.

"_Upset! _You belittle me insult me on purpose and you accuse me of being upset? That is rich, Snape!"

"Sit down, you foolish boy!" Harry flinched at the hard tone as the word boy was snarled out and Snape stopped. Harry lifted his head to find himself in the calculated gaze of the Professor. He swallowed thickly and sat down again as Snape said, taking a deep breath. "It has been years since my behavior in class has managed to rouse this kind of response from you, Mr. Potter so I ask again, what has gotten you so upset?"

Harry looked away and mumbled. "It is nothing."

"Then that nothing must be a whole lot of nothing."

"It is just some stuff with Ginny."

"And please clarify yourself, Mr. Potter, to what 'stuff' you are referring to with Miss Weasley? Did it have to do with my letter?"

"Yes, she wasn't too pleased about it."

"I assumed she wouldn't be but in what manner did she voice this unhappiness?"

"In front of the whole common room and the school. She had some interesting theories to why you would go to such lengths to break her and I up." Harry wasn't sure if Snape wouldn't lose his composure when he would hear just exactly what kind of theories Ginny had come up with.

Harry sighed, what was he supposed to do? Was he supposed to tell the older wizard or wait until he had heard it from the grapevine? No better tell his master himself.

He took a deep breath and looked up, directly into Snape's eyes as he said. "Ginny insinuated the reason for the letter was because you were afraid of competition from her, sir."

"Competition?" Snape's eyebrow rose in an inquiry and Harry knew his master was dangerous as he nodded and said.

"Yes, she implied that we were lovers."

"Lovers?" Snape's voice broke as the older wizard got to his feet and paces, hissing. "How dimwitted is she? The apprenticeship is not supposed to be a courtship. I'm supposed to teach you my craft and lore, not teach you about sex…."

Snape continued his rant and Harry looked away. No, it would be too much to ask for somebody who did want him. It didn't have to be on that level, certainly but Harry had received so little kindness and comfort in his life that he just wanted somebody to be there to sling an arm around his shoulder whenever he was feeling upset, like now. Remus and Sirius had never made any objects and Harry had always wanted to tell them about the Dursleys and what their behavior had been like for somebody who they loathed to be given in their care and left at their mercy.

"Potter, are you even listening to me?" Snape's hand touched his shoulder and Harry hastily flinched away, pulling his head towards his chest and bringing his hands up to cover and protect his face. Snape's hand dropped away as if the older wizard had been burned and Snape snarled. "Merlin, what is wrong with you, boy?"

"Don't call me that!" Harry shot to his feet, embarrassed to be caught like that and he faced Snape as the older wizard hissed.

"Then what should I call you, girl perhaps?"

"No!" Harry looked away as he said through numb lips. "I just don't like it when you call me that in that tone."

"And why is that?" Harry shrugged and Snape's voice dropped to a more gentler level as the older wizard said. "Potter, there is a reason for such a violent reaction to a term so what is it? I need to hear a justified reason why you dislike the word so much."

"It is the one my uncle always used when he was cross with me or when I was in trouble." Harry still looked at the floor and Snape sneered, arms crossed over his chest.

"Oh when you had to get up from your lazy arse to do some chores? Poor little Potter, he had to dirty his fingers and perhaps even break a nail doing chores for not getting a perfect score on his report card. What did he do to punish you I wonder, made you stand in the corner for a minute or perhaps take away your dessert?"

It was the last straw. The already stressful day and now Snape's mocking tone combined with things Ginny had said was too much as Harry snapped. He didn't care anymore, let his master make of what he will as he spat, angry and bitter tears in his eyes.

"I would be lucky if I would even get fed! I wish I could stand in a corner or eat my favorite dessert but that would imply that they would cook for me and not I for them! It would imply that I got to sit at the table with them and eat regular meals like a normal person, not sneak out of my cupboard in the death of the night to hope uncle Vernon didn't lock the fridge to find something to eat because else it would be stealing from the trash! I had hoped that I would be punished for not getting a perfect record card instead of for getting a better report card than Dudley. They would show the freak what it would do to be better then their precious son! It was the cupboard for Harry Bloody Potter, the Boy Nobody Wanted, for five weeks! I got smacked for saying I didn't feel well and I couldn't do my chores! Nobody took pity on me! I was for death in my cupboard when I was ill as aunt Petunia checked on me several times a day in the hopes I had died! She didn't take me to the hospital when Dudley ganged up on me and kicked me so hard I broke three ribs, she merely sneered at me that I wasn't doing my chores. It didn't matter to anybody that I was in pain or…."

Belatingly he realized that tears were streaming down his face or that he was sniffling back sobs as he stared at the unmoving form of his master, the face which could have been carved from stone as he whispered. "I would give everything to even have a shadow of the life you imagined I had. To know that I was wanted and not being reminded daily that I was an unwanted burden, an unnatural freak and that they should have left me out on the doorstep to freeze to death! A baby of one year who had just lost his parents may be a big surprise but why couldn't they be like any normal family and just accept me and love me?"

"Potter…I…." Snape began to say but Harry's fist was shaking in a futile attempt to control the stream of words that seemed intent on breaking free as he continued.

"And I thought it had ended when I entered Hogwarts but it just continued, every bloody summer. I thought that after my fifth year, when the Order told uncle Vernon that he should treat me better it would all change. Do you even know what happened when we got home? He tossed me in my room for a week with a bolt in front of the door and a cat door for food every few hours. Once a day I got to use the loo. My wand was taken from me and he made me write those letters with him standing behind me, to make sure I didn't write anything to tell them about what happened…"

He couldn't even say anything as he took a deep breath that actually hurt to try and keep the sobs inside. A hand on his shoulder pressed him back into his chair where he sat hiccupping. Another hand pressed a glass of water into his hands and Harry gulped it down. "Slow sips." Snape commanded and Harry forced himself to sip slowly.

"Alright, let me go over this again to make sure that I have everything right, can you help me with that, Mr. Potter?" Harry gave a nod as he drew in a shaky breath. He glanced up to see that Snape had pulled a chair up and was sitting opposite him, leaning forward as he rested his elbows on his knees.

"Very well. You were sleeping in a cupboard instead of a proper bed. You often were not fed. Belittled and even beaten on purpose when you best their son. You were not given any medications when you were ill and your family even denied you the most basic of human needs." Snape's voice was as elegant and even as ever but when Harry looked up, he could see how angry his master really was.

The dark eyes shot fire as Snape twitched his fingers for a moment as he sat in silence, having finished with his summary. Harry gave a nod as he realized Snape was waiting for an answer and then Snape asked.

"Did Madam Pomfrey never make any mentioning of this abuse when she examined you before you were cleared for Quidditch?"

"She said…" Harry choked back a sob and continued in a hoarse whisper. "She said that I was malnourished and thin and that she would make a mentioning of it in my student file but she never asked the reason. I assumed that after a while, when nobody asked what had happened or who did that to me, that she just didn't care like all the other doctors and nurses."

"There was never a nurse or a doctor who saw your wounds and contacted child services?"

Harry shook his head. "No, uncle Vernon would always say that I was an unruly child and the only way to handle me was through corporeal punishment."

"And you believed him." It was a statement, not a question.

"There was no reason since nobody ever denied it." Harry looked away to the floor, not seeing the look of compassion on his master's face.

Hp

"Why did you never go to either Professor McGonagall or even the Weasleys? Molly Weasley would have loved to have you in her home permanently." Severus watched as Potter shrugged and the younger male answered.

"Why should I? Nothing would change except more trouble."

_Ah yes, why trust an adult when they have failed you so many times in your life? _

"Surely Molly Weasley or even your friend Ronald would have made comments to you about…."

"Ron did hint towards it and I'm sure that Mr. and Mrs. Weasley tried but they always said that Dumbledore said I needed to return to the Dursleys at least two or three weeks during the summer for the blood wards."

_Ah, that is the puppet master behind all of this. How long had you know__n Albus that Potter wasn't treated well at the bitch Petunia's house? What excuse did you use to placate Poppy when she came to you with the results of her diagnosis? If only Poppy thought the sun shone from your arse and trusted me or Minerva enough with her findings concerning Potter, we could have made the necessary arrangements to find Potter a proper home. You left too much to chance, Headmaster, you never once cared for the boy, did you? _

"It would not have been necessary. Your mother cast a spell over you, a spell that was a combination of her blood and that of James which would have protected you anywhere in a place you called home. Petunia's blood was not fueled by magic and thus if the Dark Lord had not been so fearful of that protection and attacked your families home, those wards wouldn't have protected you."

"I could have lived someplace else?" Potter looked up and the miserable green eyes of his apprentice tore at Severus' heart. He gave a nod and Potter asked in a small voice, begging Severus to lie.

"But surely Dumbledore hadn't known that…I mean….you're smarter than he is and you have more access to books so you would know that and Dumbledore wouldn't have…I mean, he wouldn't have sent me to that place time and time again if it hadn't been for the blood wards and…"

_Sadly Harry, he would have. He needed you to believe that it was your lot in life to deserve everything life handed out to you. He needed to make sure that your trust in adults was so shaky that you wouldn't dream of going to them for help even when it was plain that you couldn't cope. __He needed to make you so independent that when he asked you to make the biggest sacrefice, that of your life, he could trust in you to do it without hesitation because you were convinced nobody would miss you because you believed that they didn't care._

Severus ignored the hopeful look his apprentice was sending him, begging for him to confirm something that Harry desperately needed to believe to keep sane. Else, why would somebody who pretended to care for him send him back time and time again to a place he had been abused unless he didn't know that there was a different solution?

But if Severus lied now, he knew that Potter would never heal and that was something that the younger male needed above all, and that meant no more lies, no matter how Potter may resent Severus for it, it needed to be said.

"Potter…Harry, he had more access to books and research because he was Headmaster of Hogwarts. He knew very well what he was sending you back to every summer."

Potter rose as he screamed. "It isn't true! He cared for me! You're just jealous that he cared about me and not about you…I saw it in your memories and…."

Severus reacted in two seconds when Potter turned tail and fled. His locking spell hit the door before Potter did as the young male tore at the doorknob fruitlessly. "Let me out!"

"No, Harry, we need to talk about this."

"Let me go! You just can't stand the truth in knowing that he didn't care about you and did about me and…"

Severus cautiously approached his apprentice who was trembling as he carefully lay a hand on the shaking shoulder. Potter's voice broke on a sob and the next moment he turned and launched himself at Severus.

Severus assumed the younger male would hit him but Potter merely flung his arms around Severus, burying his face in his chest as he wept. Gobsmacked but the painful sobs tearing at his heart he brought his arms up to cradle Potter as the younger male whispered brokenly.

"He cared."

"Yes, Harry he did, but the way he did was as destructive as the Dursleys care. If he really cared for you the way he told you, he should have taken you out of there and placed you somewhere else. But you are right, in his own way, Albus cared but that doesn't mean he did do right by you."

Soothingly stroking the dark hair, Severus allowed his apprentice to cry and hopefully heal from all the hurt done to him by people who said they cared for him.

Hp

Several embarrassing moments later Harry was sitting back in his chair, sipping his glass of water. He was still hiccupping on occasion but preferred not to dwell further on the moments he had spent bawling his eyes out like a little kid against Snape's firm chest. His master had been traumatized enough surely.

He also prefered not to dwell any further on how he kept thinking that Snape's chest had been very firm, he was a freak.

"Harry?" And when had Snape began to call him Harry?

He glanced up to find himself blinking up at a pristine white handkerchief that was handed to him by his master. He gave a nod and accepted it without question as he dabbed at his eyes, murmuring a soft thank you.

He took a deep breath and another sip of water, finally silenced. He did feel better, as if some of the weight he had carried for so long had disappeared when he had started crying. His stomach growled and Harry glanced up, pink tainting his cheeks.

"Shall I order us some lunch?" Snape's tone was dry and Harry nodded, glad that his master wasn't mocking him any longer. "Is there anything specific you would like to eat?"

"As long as it doesn't contain too many vegetables, I'm happy." Harry answered as Snape raised an eyebrow. The older wizard wrote something on a empty parchment and then said.

"So if I wish to torture you, I can give you vegetables."

"Well, with everything that the Dursleys didn't feed me, I'm not a picky eater." Harry watched as Snape tapped the parchment once and it disappeared. Snape settled behind his desk, fingers steepled together as he regarded Harry.

Just when his master opened his mouth to say something there was a knock on the door. Giving Harry a long and hard look which he couldn't place, Snape said. "Enter."

Harry turned in his seat so he didn't have to look directly at the door. Whoever entered didn't need to know that he had been crying.

"Professor Snape?"

Harry suddenly didn't care anymore as he turned in his seat to look at the pale, handsome, blond male that was standing in the doorway. Draco didn't even seem to be surprised that Harry was here as the grey eyes focused on his face for a second and then shot back to Snape's face.

"Yes, what can I do for you, Mr. Malfoy? I'm a little bit busy with Mr. Potter here…"

"I have to talk to you and Potter, sir."

"And why would you need to talk to Mr. Potter? I'm quite sure that anything regarding him has nothing to do with me and vice versa."

"He is your apprentice, therefore his protection and your own are of the uttermost importance. I think you would like to hear what I've to say, Professor." The older male's voice dropped a little and Harry frowned. He glanced at Snape to see the mask of indifference settle over his face as he nodded and said.

"Then come in and close the door behind you." Snape sneered at him and Harry sat up straighter. What was Malfoy going on about.

Draco took the chair next to Harry and said. "This is difficult for me to say. We all know that not all the Death Eaters died or were taken prisoner, when the Dark Lord died, no matter what the Prophet and the Ministry want us to believe. There are still death eaters out there, many more are on the mainland that we don't even know about…"

"That _you_ don't know about, Draco! I have been in the Dark Lord's ranks longer than you." Snape cut in. Harry looked at Draco, at the way he was clenching his forearm. He had been branded by the dark mark, just like his master.

"Yes, well…" A hint of impatience crept into the cultured voice and Draco took a deep breath before he continued. "There is talk about harming Potter, getting even for what he did to the Dark Lord."

"I killed a madman, how are they planning to get even?" Harry blurted out. It should have bothered him more that there were people out in the world to get him but he already knew that he had made some enemies when he had killed Voldemort. "I saved the world…"

"And you destroyed theirs but this hardly matters. It will take time before all of these rogue death eaters are gathered up, Draco. Unless you have heard of an organized attack towards Potter, then the amount of danger is not worth mentioning."

Draco leveled Snape with a gaze and then said. "I just thought you should know."

"And I thank you for the wonderful news. Now if that was all, then you may leave. I promised my apprentice some lunch." Draco rose, gracefully as he brushed his robes back into place. The older male walked to the door and then turned around and blurted out.

"So is it true then?"

"Is what true?" Snape glanced up.

"That you and Potter are lovers." So the rumors were already spreading.

Harry tried to keep a straight face as Snape purred. "Mr. Malfoy, it seemed that the credit I gave you all those years for your intelligence was completely wasted when with just one comment you prove that you're a shallow dunderhead as the rest of the student population! You know the implications of an apprenticeship bond and you should also guess at my reasons for taking Potter on as an apprentice but if that language was too difficult for you, let me say it plainly. I'm not Potter's lover, nor is he mine. Now gladly see yourself out."

And as the door banged shut behind Draco, Harry couldn't contain himself and laughed, laughing only harder at the look of surprise and amusement on Snape's face before his master too chuckled and Harry couldn't help but thinking that it was a sound he liked.

**That is it for now. I hope you liked that. I need some ideas for the next chapter. Review of course as always, they help my day. **

**In the next chapter: Harry finds out just how small Hogwarts is with all the rumors that are spreading about Snape and him and how hard it is to avoid somebody you don't want to see when Ginny seems to pop up everywhere to flaunt her new captures in his face. How will Severus handle himself when he is called to the Headmistress office to answer some questions about the rumors? And rogue death eaters terrorize the wizarding community, do they have a plan or are they just retaliating? That and more in: consequences. **


	12. Consequences

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. Let's begin.**** The village in Surrey does not belong to me nor have I ever been there. I found it on the internet. **

Long after the time for dinner had come round and even the smell that lingered in the chair Potter had occupied earlier was gone, Severus sat in his office, lost in thoughts. His hand was curled around his long since cold cup of tea but it was nothing compared to the coldness in his heart.

For so long he had justified his anger, rage and hatred towards Potter by telling himself that the younger wizard had received an upbringing that Severus even in his wildest dreams could not even comprehend and he had turned a blind eye to the signs of abuse the young male displayed.

Every summer Potter returned to school thin and dull eyed his movements shaky and sometimes even sluggish. Every time Severus had assumed that it was because Potter didn't want to return to school and was therefore resorting to unhealthy eating or perhaps even refusing to eat to get his way but he could not have been further from the truth.

What he had believed to be signs of arrogance had been carefully hidden signs of abuse. All the times he had been angry when Potter had flaunted his disregard for the rules and thus his disrespect to those who set them had been nothing more than the resourcefulness of a child who knew he couldn't depend on adults. Who had learned at a too young age to fend for himself and who didn't trust anybody else because they would let him down.

And the most astonishing thing was, Dumbledore had allowed this and even encouraged it. He had never once taken care of Potter, not even when the young male had been so distressed after Black's death. No, he sent him back to his abusive family and left the boy alone to suffer the grief and the depression alone.

His hand curled around the tea cup and the next moment it flew through the room, the noise of the china shattering against the wall startling Severus from his thoughts. He looked down at his empty hand and looked back up at the tea that dribbled down the wall and the shattered remains of the cup that was lying on the stone floor.

He closed his eyes, running a weary hand over his face before pushing it through his hair. How was he going to deal with this? It had happened so many years ago that taking the appropriate steps now, requesting an examination with a qualified mediwitch, contacting child services to notify them of the muggles behavior, notify the Ministry to never send a child to that place again, place Potter someplace else, was not going to make any difference.

It wouldn't help Potter, the younger male was struggling enough without having to be forced to relive the whole terrible ordeal of what he had gone through at the hands of his family. Severus sighed.

There was not a doubt in his head that Potter was telling the truth. He had known the younger male could explode on occasion but Potter had never lied regarding his family and the images that Severus had seen in their Occlumency lesson, they suddenly made sense.

But right now he needed a plan to deal with his apprentice. He needed to change his tactics in dealing with Potter. He needed to rebuild a trusting relationship with his apprentice, not one based on force but one based on equality. It would take time but Potter already trusted him that Severus would never lie to him but now Severus needed to take it further.

He was unaware that he was stroking the bracelet soothingly, feeling Potter's magic echo against his skin. His hands clenched because he had seen how upset Potter still was when Severus had sent him away to go to his afternoon classes. A part of him, long forgotten and buried had wanted to write Potter a pass to excuse him from his classes but he knew that it would only fuel the rumors and could quite easily damage Potter's reputation further.

He looked up when the floo flared green. He raised an eyebrow when he saw Minerva spinning into view. _Please, she better not start pestering me why I didn't attend dinner, I have had other things to worry about._

But her expression wasn't amused when she stepped into his office. Severus sat up straight; her expression was serious and nearly deadly as she said. "Could you come up to my office, Severus? There are some things that have come to my attention which need immediate addressing."

Had Potter gone to her to complain? That little noisy sot…or had it been a different student? Severus found himself agreeing as he rose from his desk and followed Minerva through the floo and into her office, wondering the whole way what the hell was going on.

Hp

"Harry?" Harry glanced around the crowded common room to find the person who was calling his name. The Gryffindors were all chattering rather loudly so Harry narrowed his eyes, and shrugged. If it was important enough the person would surely call his name again.

He focused back on his Charms book. He had missed the lesson, _thanks to Snape_. But Harry knew he couldn't really be that annoyed with his master anymore. The day may have started out rather unwell but after his lunch time chat with his master, or more like crying bout, Harry did have to admit that his heart didn't feel so heavy anymore. It was just like a huge weight had been lifted off his chest.

"Harry?" A hand touched his shoulder and Harry turned in his chair, his face blank. Hermione was standing behind him and even as the customary smile came to his face before he remembered what had happened a couple of days ago at dinner and it slid ride off.

Hermione raised an eyebrow at him but she bit her lip before she looked away. Harry sighed and closed his book. It seemed that he wouldn't get much work done and he focused on his oldest female friend, wondering what was going to happen now.

Would she accuse him of new things or would she like to talk about something else now? Harry supposed it would be nice to talk to Hermione; it was so very different from talking to Ron. Hermione always knew what was going on in his head sometimes even before he did.

"Harry, can we talk?" Harry raised an eyebrow and looked around the noisy common room. He nodded and gestured to the empty chair across from him. Ron was at the Quidditch field, Harry had declined. He knew that he couldn't join the team anymore, even when he wanted to but he was going to be too busy with his normal classes and his apprenticeship to Snape to worry about Quidditch matches.

It had been so long since he had gone flying but he couldn't even find the time to simply focus upon the simple pleasure of taking his broom with him for a ride. It always seemed that somebody needed him these days.

"Uhm, in private." Hermione glanced towards the stairs that led to the boys' dormitory but Harry immediately shook his head. He knew where this was going to lead if people saw him walking up the steps alone with Hermione Granger and the last thing he needed was more rumors.

He gestured towards the seat across from him and said. "Come and sit down, I'll cast the privacy spells."

"But Harry…"

"No, Hermione, it will only bring about more rumors and those are the last things that I need so either way here or we can go outside if you want to go for a walk around the lake." Harry thought it was pretty generous of him to even talk to Hermione when she hadn't once said she was sorry.

Her eyes narrowed and finally she sat down. Harry added the privacy spells around the two of them and Hermione seemed to relax a little, sitting calmly in her chair as she looked around before straightening up and looking at Harry, who got a funny feeling in his stomach at her determent look.

"You broke up with Ginny!" The way it sounded made the hackles rise and Harry had to put in a good effort not to snap at her. He merely raised a cool eyebrow at her before he said; opening the book he was holding.

"If you're going to lecture me about personal stuff, such as breaking up with Ginny without even knowing the circumstances, then I'm going to go back to my Charms homework! I've a lot of catching up to do and I had a day from hell so I really don't need another lecture, Hermione! You're not my mother! You're supposed to be my friend and I could use some support, not lecture after lecture!"

Harry shot a glare her way and then went back to his book, not reading a letter but not taking down the privacy spells either. Hermione was silent beside him before she fidgeted a little while and finally said in a small voice. "Harry?"

Harry looked up, one eyebrow raised as he waited for Hermione to speak. His friend had tears in her eyes but Harry told himself to remain steadfast. He knew Hermione and she could waltz over a person.

"I'm sorry, Harry! I know that this hasn't been fair on you but if you could just see how much Ginny is suffering and how much she cares about you…"

Harry closed the book with a snap and hissed. "Oh, she cares so much for me that she is off with another bloke within a day! She has moved on, Hermione! I mean what does that say about our relationship! If she really cared as much as you say she did then she wouldn't be licking Dean Thomas' tonsils in the corridors."

He was breathing heavily, the rage hadn't quite died down yet but Harry looked away. It didn't upset him that he had broken up with Ginny but it did upset him that she didn't think he was worth more.

He sighed and looked down when Hermione's hand touched his own in what was supposed to be a consolation gesture. He looked up to meet her eyes. Hermione's eyes were compassionate and Harry realized how much he had missed her.

"Harry, did you want to break up with her?" Harry looked away before he nodded to the book in his lap.

"But why?"

"I…I can't love her. It doesn't feel right. I'm struggling too much with myself to deal with her as well. Snape was right…he made me see…."

Hermione seemed to stiffen and the hand touching his own grew tense and firm, nearly painful as Hermione whispered. "What do you mean with Snape was right, Harry?"

Harry looked up and finally said. "When I blew up in the Great Hall at Ginny and then at you well Snape came to collect me to ask me what has gotten me so upset. He asked me if I was alright with my relationship with Ginny because he knows how much I need to sort myself out. It is just that in the apprenticeship document there is something about not having a relationship while serving the apprenticeship but Snape said that he wouldn't make a point out of it unless I wasn't comfortable with it. So I confessed to him that I would rather have some time alone to focus on my apprenticeship and my studies and he sent a letter, well, I'm quite sure that you read it…"

"Actually I didn't but Snape stepped up as your master?"

Harry could only nod and Hermione grinned and suddenly threw her arms around him in an unexpected hug. "Oh Harry that is wonderful."

"What do you mean?" He choked out, petting her upon the shoulder awkwardly.

"It is wonderful that there is somebody who is looking out for your needs and who takes care of you. You really deserve that, Harry!" Hermione beamed and Harry couldn't help but smile, yes it was wonderful indeed.

"So, is this because you're lovers?" Harry gaped at her and as Hermione laughed, Harry couldn't help but join in, his hand stroking his bracelet and as he felt the powerful magic respond against his skin, he couldn't help but sigh a little and wonder, would he ever be somebody's lover?

Hp

"Well, Minerva, what is this about?" Severus sat down, carefully arranging his robes about him so they fell gracefully as he extended his long legs. He looked up at the elderly witch who was looking at him with narrowed eyes. He frowned, had he done something that bad?

"It has come to my attention that there are certain rumors going on about you and Mr. Potter…"

_Oh,__ so that was what this had been about._

Severus allowed himself a smirk and said. "Oh come now, Minerva, you know just as well as me the students' ability to overexhegerate everything."

"I've had three students with me today, Severus that told me that they saw you hitting Potter with a spell in Defense that knocked him back and nearly killed him."

"It was nothing. Potter just knocked his head against a tile and blacked out for a moment but if it makes you feel better, I'll apologize to the brat."

"See that you do, Severus. I will not have you abusing your apprentice." Her voice was strict and Severus fought the urge to roll his eyes.

"I did not abuse him. I lost my temper with him that is all."

"You seem to lose your temper a lot where Potter is concerned, Severus…"

He veered up from his chair, too agitate to remain seated as he paced the length of the office and said, gesturing wildly with his hands. "It is always about Potter! I know how to handle my apprentice; Minerva and I really do not need a lecture about that. My apprentice is my own business! I know my behavior towards Potter in the past has been childish and petty and I thought that you would have more faith in me, even when I know that it is a lot to ask for, to work through my grudges and to treat Potter like an equal and my apprentice and not as some snotty brat. If you're so keen to place blame then I ask you, as the boy's former Head of House, why you never once looked into Potter's home life!"

"What are you talking about, Severus?"

"The boy has been abused by his relatives, Minerva!" Severus snarled as he watched the Headmistress go pale. She collapsed back against her chair, clutching her chest and Severus found his own anger fading quickly.

"No!" Her voice was strangled and Severus was suddenly reminded of how much she cared for Potter. About how much she seemed to care for all those lost students, about how much she had once cared about him.

He sank back in his chair, bowing his head as he whispered. "Yes, Potter, the Chosen One, the Golden Boy has been abused by his muggle relatives. He was beaten, starved and made to work to earn his keep. The boy was thought to be worth less than the dust covering the floor."

He took a deep breath and then confessed. "I can't do this, Minerva. Every time that I think that I'm making some progress with Potter some new layer opens up and there is a new hurt. What if I cannot heal him? He has to want it himself but the only thing that he seems to want is somebody to take care of him. I'm not that kind of person."

"But it is the kind of person your apprentice needs, Severus." Yet despite the warm tone and the hand on his shoulder, Severus knew it may just be an impossible task that was laid out before him. "You can do this, I know you can. I know _you, _Severus!"

"Then if you say you know me, how can you say in good conscience that I'm what is best for Potter?" Severus sounded more weary than annoyed or angry. Minerva gazed down at him with a tiny smile and said.

"Because despite all the things you've done, you've always been brave and have never shrunk away from a challenge. I know that I'm asking you to do something nearly impossible and unheard of, to show compassion to a Potter but if you can show Harry in this year that he is worthy of your attention, time and perhaps even friendship it will benefit him far more and I think that he may even find the strength to carry on. Right now, he is like a lost child, a child who has lost everything. I know that while you would never admit it, you feel the same but you know how to carry on, even when things seem at their darkest and I'm sure that you can show this to Harry as well."

"Potter has never reacted well to role models."

"That is because he never had any reason to trust any and the roles models set before him may not have been right for Harry."

"I agree wholeheartedly with you on that, Minerva." Severus hid a snort when he thought of Black and how unfit he had been for his young apprentice. He sobered when he thought that Potter would have probably had a better life if he had been living with Black than with the muggle family.

He took a deep breath and said. "Then why are you so sure that I can do this?"

"Because, despite everything that has happened between you two, Harry knows that he can trust you not to lie to him and at the moment, that is more than any of us had."

"I'll give it a try, Minerva. You know that I do intend to honor the apprenticeship document and look after my apprentice in all regards." Minerva smirked at him, the smirk of a certain tabby cat who had gotten into the cream as she purred.

"Oh, _in all regards, _Severus? Also the areas the rumors have been spreading about?" And as Minerva laughed softly, Severus felt the color stain his cheeks and he choked on the sip of tea he had been about to drink.

Hp

"Good grief, Minerva, never say such things again!" He scolded at her, finally managed to catch his breath even though his throat was a bit scorched.

Minerva handed him a glass of cold water and Severus took a grateful sip. She waited until he had swallowed and had set the glass down before she remarked, sitting down in the chair opposite him. "Severus, I know how close the relationship can become between apprentice and master, it wouldn't really be surprising if you did end up _teaching _Mr. Potter in other areas."

Severus fixed her with a glare and hissed. "He is my student."

"He is your apprentice before he is your student, Severus."

"I would never sleep with a student."

"I'm not asking you to, Severus! I'm merely saying that I know of the closeness of a master/apprenticeship bond and I'll not stand in your way should it evolve naturally. There are many apprentices and masters who ended up married to one another or had a thing during the apprenticeship." Minerva looked away with a small smile and Severus wondered for a moment who she was thinking about.

He had kept himself detached in his apprenticeship. Normally it was only proper that master and apprentice shared as much as they could in order to have a good relationship and so the master could help the apprentice but Severus had been forced to keep certain things hidden.

But despite the Dark Lord, Severus remembered his apprenticeships fondly. He could clearly recall that there had been things he could not wait to teach his own apprentice one day. And now Potter was his apprentice.

Severus took a sip of his now nearly cold tea, grimaced and cast a charm on it. Yes, he would show Potter what it was like to brew all his night with his master, to harvest ingredients in the Forbidden Forest on a full moon with nothing to fear and more things, yes, Severus smiled; he would make Potter realize that Potions was fun.

Hp

The next morning dawned far too early for Harry's sake and he pulled his pillow over his head. He groaned at the sound of giggle and hushing in the common room. He closed his eyes for a mere second…

"Hush, you'll wake up the others. You're not supposed to be here!" Dean's voice broke through Harry's sleep clouded mind and he opened one eye. Who in the hell was Dean talking to?

There was more giggling and then Ginny purred. "You didn't complain last night!"

Harry was suddenly wide awake as he shot up in the bed. He counted himself lucky that he had drawn the curtains around his bed yesterday as he added his usual silence spells to ensure nobody woke up when he had a nightmare. Several groans sounded from around the dormitory and then Ron snarled.

"What the hell are you doing here, Ginny?" Harry fumbled for his glasses on the nightstand as he took his wand in his hand to cancel the spells he had done on the curtains.

He looked around the room, Ginny was curled up against Dean underneath the covers while the boy in questioning stood in his dressing gown besides the bed, looking sheepishly and guilty. Dean shot a glance towards Harry that was nearly an apology but Harry ignored the other boy, he really had no taste for this early in the morning.

He pulled the covers back, glad that he had decided to wear a shirt and sleeping trousers to bed. Ginny looked at him, daring him to make a comment but Harry merely raised an eyebrow. What would it be to him if she wanted to whore herself around?

Without any comment except a soft good morning to Ron who looked ready to explode as he faced his sister and dorm mate, Harry disappeared into the showers, he really didn't need to see this.

The hot water that ran through his hair and down his face, dripping down his nose woke him up and allowed Harry to relax. He sighed, closing his eyes as he braced his hands against the walls, bowing his head against the warm sprays of water against his skin. This felt amazing.

The bracelet slid down his wrist a little and warmed against his skin. Harry glanced towards it, wondering if the striking snake was turning color but it was just the same color steel as it always was. _I don't put it past Snape to come and fetch me out of the shower to give me a lesson on how to properly prepare for a potions class…_

Harry snorted, inhaling water as he coughed, shaking his head in amusement. He could almost imagine the screams and shouts that Snape would attract when he came stalking in. The slender hand that would curl around the shower curtain would be the only warning Harry would've before his master yanked it away and stepped in, clothes turning wet underneath the hot spray and Harry would surely stare at the older wizard.

Would Snape's dark eyes smolder or would they rake over Harry's body mockingly before Snape made a joke about how Harry looked? Or would he climb in and….

The door banged open and two voices called out to one another and Harry stumbled in the shower. He flushed bright red, even when he knew that nobody could see him since he was all alone in the shower. He groaned as he ran a hand over his face. What had he been thinking?

Well it was clear what or rather who he had been thinking about but why should he be thinking about Snape while being in the shower? Harry shook his head at himself; he really was a freak if he thought these things just because somebody showed him some kindness.

But he was really glad that nobody could see him when he noticed just what his line of thinking had achieved and with a bemused grin, Harry set out to take care of his healthy morning erection, trying hard not to imagine pale hands roaming over his chest doing unspeakable things to him and failing quite badly.

Hp

Severus eyed the empty Great Hall as he seated himself for breakfast. He poured himself a cup of coffee and took a sip, closing his eyes in enjoyment. _Bollocks to those who say that tea is as good as coffee. Tea can never wake one up the way coffee does. Perhaps I'm not a proper Englishman but I could care less. I enjoy my coffee in the morning, anybody would with my schedule. _

He had spent most of the night tossing and turning in his bed worrying about Potter, the lessons, Potter, the apprenticeship, Potter and Draco's warning. He wasn't too worried about Draco's prediction; he knew that the Ministry would've a hard time to catch every Death Eater that was on the loose, especially in such a short time.

He swirled his coffee in the cup before draining it and pouring another one. Bleary eyed students entered the Great Hall, whispering to one another the moment they caught sight of Severus sitting at the Staff Table on his own. Severus sent a sneer their way.

"Ah, good morning, Severus." Severus inclined his head in a nod as the tiny Charms Teacher Fillius Flitwick sat himself down beside him. The tiny master duelist helped himself to some bacon and eggs that had appeared on the table as Severus reached out for a slice of toast.

On normal mornings, well as normal as mornings were at an enchanted magic school, Severus usually only stared at his empty plate and considered his third cups of coffee in the morning a suitable breakfast but ever since Poppy had lectured him about that, he had made an effort to eat more.

"Severus, I've a question regarding your apprentice. Mr. Potter failed to show up for his class yesterday and I was wondering if you perhaps knew what kept him. I expected him to be here for lunch so I could ask him but I haven't seen him since…."

"Mr. Potter was helping me with my defense class. I called for him. I expected him to come in for lunch but there was a problem that needed attending immediately. I'll send a message next time this happens." Severus wasn't normally this polite but it did mean a lot to him that Flitwick was at least trying to put the past year behind him and respected Severus decisions regarding his apprentice.

"No, it is fine. It is your right as a master to call your apprentice whenever you've need of him. I was just asking to make sure Mr. Potter was alright and not skipping class."

"Oh, the brat won't dare to skip class with me on his back." Severus muttered before he took a bite of his toast. Flitwick cleared his throat beside him and Severus' eyes widen as he realized what he had said.

"That isn't what I meant the way it sounded…." He began to stammer as the tiny Professor held up a hand, miraculously not managing to smile or to laugh as he answered.

"I know, Severus, I know." And as Severus stared down at his plate he shook his head. Spending too much time with Potter made him think things he hadn't thought in a long time but as he searched his feelings, he realized that he should feel more annoyed than he currently was feeling.

Hp

Harry was glad that Ginny had disappeared to her own dorm when he came back to the seventh year dormitory. He busied himself with dressing and straightening out his bed, ignoring Ron's grumbling before a small cough called for his attention. He turned to find Dean standing at the end of his bed, looking guilty as the older boy fidgeted with his hands before he asked. "Harry, can I have a quick word?"

Harry gave a nod, continuing on with packing his bag. "In private?"

"I'm sure that you can say whatever you want to say right here, Dean. I can almost imagine what this is about."

"You can?" Dean looked a little bit frightened but Harry didn't press his point. "Yeah well, I mean are you alright with me and Ginny and all?"

Harry had known it. He had known it the moment Dean had looked at him this morning. Contemplating his answer he sat down on his bed, ran a hand through his hair, cleaned his glasses before he said, knowing he wasn't making Dean any more comfortable. He didn't care. "What do you want me to say, Dean? Do you want me to smile at you and congratulate you on being with my ex girlfriend? Do you think I'm pleased that a mere day after we broke up, she is practically hopping into the bed of another? Do you know how that makes me feel? I don't care about Ginny anymore, really and I can't lay a claim on her so she can do whatever she wants though it would be nice if she didn't flaunt it so much in my face. I still prefer some rooms to be a Ginny free zone."

Dean looked away for a moment and then asked. "But you've got Snape?"

Harry raised an eyebrow and said. "Snape is my mentor and I'm his apprentice. He is my Professor but not my lover!"

"Oh…so the rumor?"

"Is just that, a rumor. Ginny started it because of Snape's letter that he sent as my master but I'm not his lover nor is he mine."

"Okay good and well about the other stuff. I'll talk to Ginny about that, alright. She seems really keen on doing it in places where you may catch us, strange as it is."

"You don't say." Harry muttered as Dean grinned at him and said.

"Thanks, Harry, you're the best."

"Yeah, you would imagine that somebody who is the best actually had somebody to care about." He said as soft as possible but as he looked up and saw the look Ron gave him, he knew that he hadn't been quiet enough.

Hp

Harry balled his fist as he heard Ginny's laugh in front of him. She was hanging on Dean's arm, practically licking him every chance she got. Dean tried to pull away but Ginny wouldn't let him and she looked back at Harry with a smug smirk now and again.

Hermione made a disgusted noise beside him and Harry turned to her as she whispered. "And when did you break up exactly?"

Ron was walking next to her, hands intertwined loosely beside them and his best friend's glare was focused on Ginny and his year mate. The dark scowl made Harry glad that Ron was no longer mad at him but he answered Hermione's question. "We broke up three days ago."

Harry fingered the bracelet again, rotating his wrist so that the bracelet slipped from underneath his sleeve and partly over his hand. "That is a lovely bracelet you've there, Harry. Who gave that to you?"

Harry smiled to himself; he had forgotten how perceptive Hermione usually was. She was looking down at the apprenticeship bracelet and for a moment Harry fingered the pin that Snape had given him to proclaim his apprenticeship to the older wizard.

For perhaps the first time ever he felt proud to wear that badge and so he raised his hand to show Hermione the striking snake as it transformed into a flowing S. She reached out to touch the bracelet and Harry gasped at the strange sensation of Snape's magic intensifying as her fingers touched the leather.

Hermione gasped as well and pulled her hand back, looking Harry in the eye. They had stopped in the middle of the corridor and Hermione's lips set in a thin line as she asked. "Whose magic did I feel?'

Ron was looking at Harry as the younger male finally stammered. "It is Snape's magic. He gave me the bracelet by means of communicating with me whenever he has need of me. He is wearing one similar to mine and the snake changes color whenever he has need of me. Red is for an emergency where he has need of me right this instance, yellow is for an emergency that may take a bit longer but is still rather pressing and well green means that I can take my time and finish what I'm doing before I go to help him. The snake changes to an S whenever we're in the vicinity of Muggles. It is quite crafty."

"It looks beautiful. So he has a similar bracelet only infused with your magic?" Hermione was all ears and Harry was sure that soon she would start to do research on these types of things.

"Yeah, it is slightly similar." Harry tried to evade the question. He couldn't help but grin when he remembered what he had done. Hermione raised an eyebrow at him and then placed her hands on her hips in a poor resemblance of Mrs. Weasley as she said.

"Harry James Potter, what've you done?"

And laughing, Harry told them.

Hp

Severus maintained his glare steadily as the students entered. Many were whispering behind their hands to each other as they stared at him. He merely raised an eyebrow and pretended that he didn't know what they were whispering about.

Potter entered, chatting and laughing with Weasley and Granger. The younger male looked so different from yesterday that Severus felt relief well up within him. His apprentice needed somebody to talk to and to laugh with.

Potter looked up at him and gave him a small smile, taking his seat before he reached for the food that stood before him. Severus gave his apprentice a quick nod before he went back to his own meal. He ignored Minerva's pattering beside him as he ate his scrambled eggs.

The chattering of the students wasn't that much of a distraction as Severus focused on his breakfast. He looked for the owls that would appear soon every few minutes until finally they came, the fluttering of wings and excited cries from the students alerting him to the arrival of the Daily Prophet.

He gave the owl the money it needed and offered it a piece of bacon as he opened the paper. His eyes widen in shock when he stared at the front page and he didn't need Minerva's elbow in his ribs or the sudden uproar from the students to be shocked.

**Attack by Death Eaters in Surrey Leave Magical Family ****of Five Dead!**

_Early last night the qui__et wizarding community of Rowley was shocked by the discovery of the lifeless bodies of two adults and three children in their home in town. The bodies of the victims bear no marks of being harmed and aurors are therefore thinking the cause of death was the Killing Curse. _

_Above the house the Dark Mark had been seen floating by some of the neighbors who reported the crime. Inside the house, in which nothing seems to be missing, the bodies of the two adults and their three children, the youngest being 5 and the oldest 11, who was scheduled to go to Hogwarts to begin the new year on November first._

_The community has expressed shock and grief for the tragic loss…._

_Aurors have no idea who is behind this attack but Minister for Magic Kingsley Shacklebolt has stated that not all loyal Death Eaters to Voldemort, who has been killed by Harry Potter on May the second of this year, have been captured. There are rumors of Death Eaters that have escaped to the safety of continental Europe…_

Severus' eyes scanned the article, picking out certain facts and disregarding others. It hadn't escaped his notice that they had killed a child who was about to enter Hogwarts and begin his magical training. Surely it was just a coincidence. He looked up to catch Draco Malfoy's eyes and remembered his warning.

His lips curled in a grim line as he looked at Potter, discussing the article with his friends. Regardless of what feelings may exist between him and Potter, he would protect his apprentice with his life; it was a vow he intended to honor.

**I hope you liked it. Review please and send me some reviews for the next chapter. **

**The next chapter: Now as the rumors about Snape and him are spreading, how will Harry cope with the whispers that the students can't help but whisper at him? How will Harry cope when he has to aid Snape in Potions and can a possible violent encounter with an angry student show Snape that Harry may be in danger? That and more in: Potions Class. **


	13. Potions Class

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. Sorry for the delay in the update but I'm in my final year of college and my schedule has been hectic and will continue to be hectic for a while so I apologize in advance if my stories are a little bit delayed. But let's begin. Lots of Snape and Harry in this chapter. **

Ron's voice to his left, Hermione's to his right and his nose buried in the paper was not a way Harry Potter wanted to spend his morning. His eyes scanned the article and the photo that showed the ghastly dark mark hovering over the small house. Harry turned his gaze away, he had hoped, perhaps foolishly so, that once Voldemort was defeated all the evil would disappear.

He sighed and for a moment Snape's magic caressed his skin as Harry's fingers touched the bracelet absentmindedly for comfort. He was a fool. How could he have suspected things to turn right in the space of a few months?

He should be lucky, he supposed that he was no longer called to do the job for the aurors. Perhaps they had finally realized that he was a wizard barely of age who had not even finished his education and therefore had other things on his mind. He could finally focus on his own future and he really hoped that it wouldn't feature a dark lord or any manner of dark creatures. He had seen enough to last a lifetime.

He reached out for his cup of tea and took a sip, not caring for the taste. Bile rose up in his throat and Harry swallowed thickly. Those poor children and he had assumed that everything would be alright after Voldemort was defeated. _Can anyone say foolish?_

He sighed loudly, pushing the Prophet away as he stared at his breakfast. All his appetite had suddenly disappeared.

"Can you imagine anybody who would do this?" Ron asked, indicating the paper.

Harry shrugged and Hermione said, with a careful glance towards Harry. "Well, we do know of some people who could've done it. Not all Death Eaters have been rounded up, you know. But I mean, why would they do something like this? What is the use? Can't they better flee the country instead of…?"

"They want to make a statement and draw me out. I mean, I defeated their master, who wouldn't want revenge?" Harry barely realized he had spoken aloud until he heard Hermione's gasp beside him. He glanced up as Ron stuttered, pale white.

"Surely you can't be serious, Harry. I mean, come on mate, there are more people who fought against the Death Eaters…."

"Perhaps Harry isn't the only one they want to draw out…" Hermione's gaze was fixed on the Staff Table and Harry followed her gaze towards Snape. He frowned, of course, it would make sense.

"But perhaps it is just a onetime thing. You know a goodbye gift of sorts so that they can show everybody what they are capable of." Ron said hopefully and Harry didn't have the strength to contradict his friend. It may be foolish but he did hope that this would just be a onetime occurrence.

He sighed again and forced a smile to his face as Hermione said. "So you've got Potions tomorrow, Harry. What do you think? Will Snape teach the class or Slughorn?"

"Why should that be a concern of him? I mean, he will end up sucking whatever cock is in front of him." Ginny's voice was hateful and Harry's head snapped to the right as his eyes narrowed in a glare at Ginny. She was sitting against Dean Thomas who's ears turned bright red and his knuckles white as he gripped the knife with his hand but the other wizard refrained from saying anything.

Her lips curled into a sneer as she continued. "I wonder why you haven't gone after Malfoy yet. I'm sure that he has a lovely cock to suck and since you have a thing for Slytherins. Or do you simply have a thing for ugly old men…"

"Speaking of my cock, Miss Weasley, you would know, wouldn't you? Having lusted after it since your fourth year!" The drawling voice was a not altogether unpleasant sound as Harry's head and every other Gryffindor at the table swirled around to stare at Draco Malfoy.

The Slytherin ignored the people that were gaping at him and said with a cold sneer, his grey eyes not once straying from Ginny's enraged ones. "But I do wonder, why are you so interested in whatever Potter is doing it and with who? I thought that you had enough of him seeing as you have been attached by a sticking charm to the Thomas boy. Or perhaps, is it jealously, knowing that Potter never shared his cock with you? But really, Miss Weasley, I had thought that you of all people should know that discussing a gentleman's cock and preference, especially in such a loud manner, is very unbecoming of a young pureblood lady. I thought you would know that at least but it seems that with every sentence you utter you sink more and more in my opinion and what do you know, you manage to do it all on your own without help from your family. I must congratulate you; I never thought that you would succeed."

"Like your opinion matters, Malfoy!" She spat.

Draco merely smirked and said. "In some circles it still does but at least I learned when to keep my mouth shut, unlike you. Learn your lesson, Miss Weasley or else…"

Draco turned on his heel before Ginny shot up and hissed, wand raised. "Was that a threat?"

"No, merely an observation and a word of advice. You should know better than to get on the bad side of the wizarding hero. You're not making yourself popular and I know that is what you crave above all else. I suggest you play nice and suck up to some important people."

"Like you and your parents are doing!"

"Why you may take my example of course. We do it so well." And with a last smirk Draco walked away, calmly as Ginny raged.

At the Gryffindor table Harry fought his blush and shock as he met Ron's and Hermione's shocked expression. A little ways beyond Ginny was fuming against Dean but Harry tuned her out. Had it just been his imagination or had Malfoy actually helped him?

He glanced up towards the Head Table to see the dark eyes of his master linger upon him. He knew Snape had seen him and as he rose, he set off after Malfoy, intend on catching up with the blond and hopefully getting some answers.

Hp

"Malfoy, wait up!" Harry quickened his pace slightly in the deserted hallway to catch up to Draco. The older male was on his way back to the dungeon. Draco turned, eyes slightly narrowed though he did relax slightly once he noticed that Harry was alone.

"What do you want, Potter?" He asked his voice soft.

"I want nothing…well except to know why you stood up to Ginny like that. Oh and to say thank you, I suppose, though I would prefer it if you kept my cock out of the conversation. It is a bit awkward." Draco stared at him for a full minute before the other wizard shook his head, a snort escaping him.

"Come on, Potter, let's go."

"Uhm, go where?"

"Outside, or are you afraid that I'm going to harm you?" The grey eyes positively gleamed but Harry found his own smirk pulling at his lips.

"Please, I defeated Voldemort. You think that I'm afraid of you."

"You should be. I'm a very dangerous man. "

"You are barely a man, Malfoy!"

"Right, well if you compare it to your lover then no, I suppose I'm little more then a boy."

"Snape is not my lover, Malfoy. He told you so himself." Harry sighed as they walked out towards the lake. He pulled his wand from his sleeve and cast a warming charm, cursing himself for not taking his cloak with him.

"Well, you are spending an awful lot of time with him."

"I'm his apprentice. I thought that you know how an apprenticeship works."

"Yes, hence the question. I know how close a master and apprentice are so it wouldn't be strange that Snape would teach you _other _things as well. It isn't like you can just have a fling or a relationship while the document binds you."

"Malfoy, that is disturbing."

"What? Thinking of Snape as your lover? Is he too good for saintly Potter?" Draco turned to face Harry. There was a difficult expression on the pale face and Harry held up his hand as he said.

"No, it isn't that. It is just hearing you discuss my love life, or lack thereof with me like you're a friend."

"So you aren't saying that Snape is too good for you."

"What is it to you anyway?" Harry asked with narrowed eyes. His hand stroked the bracelet and he could feel it heating against his skin. He looked down and saw the serpent glowing green. Snape needed him. He glanced back up at Draco to see the blond male looking at him oddly before Draco said.

"He is a family friend." At Harry's raised eyebrow the Slytherin shook his head and said. "Right, I forgot that I'm talking to an obnoxious Gryffindor. Fine, if you must know he is my godfather. And well, I just like to see him happy that is all. He has never had an apprentice before and before you say anything, I know that he wasn't forced into this. You cannot force Severus Snape into anything. Just know what you're getting yourself into, Potter. He can teach you many things, many things indeed and it is up to you what kind of things he can teach you. But let me tell you, be aware not to betray his trust because his friendship isn't easily won."

"I won't. I respect him, Malfoy, for everything he has done for me and for everything he is doing for me. He is the one person who never took any crap from me or saw me for anybody else than who I am. I'm thankful and I swore an oath. He is my master and I would rather die than betray his trust."

"Good, see that you do." Draco smirked at him and Harry gave a nod. He turned back to the castle, feeling the bracelet heating against his skin. Snape was reminding him that he had need of Harry. "Oh and Potter?"

Harry turned back to Malfoy and raised an eyebrow. "I could be your friend you know. Just think about it."

Puzzled by the Slytherins behavior Harry shook his head and huddling closer in on himself as he walked back towards the castle. Truth be told, he didn't even need to think about this because he knew that Draco could be a friend and wasn't that a confusing thought.

Hp

Severus glanced up from his lesson plan when the soft knock came to his door. He called out an answer and as he expected, Potter stuck his messy head around the door before the younger male entered and asked. "You called for me, sir?"

"Ah, yes I did. I have need of you after dinner and for most of the night. We shall be gathering ingredients and I will show you the proper way to prepare them. That was all that I wanted to tell you."

"Alright, sir. So I don't need to…" Potter was stalling and Severus rolled his eyes as he said.

"Just focus on your lessons, Potter. I'll see you tonight after dinner. Now hurry up before you are late for your classes."

"Of course not, sir." Potter barely managed to contain his eye roll but Severus was sure that he had seen it. He merely glowered at the brat.

"Now hurry along." Severus dismissed his apprentice but as he looked up after a moment Potter still hadn't disappeared.

"Potter, what about 'hurry along' didn't you understand?" He asked, growling lightly. He was already on his guard because of the article that had appeared on the front page this morning and Potter wasn't helping matters in the slightest. Perhaps he should have just foregone tonight's lesson and make Potter scrub cauldrons instead.

"What did you think of the article this morning, Professor? Is it safe to go out into the forest?" Potter's eyes rose up to meet his own but much to his surprise Severus didn't see actual fear there. Potter appeared uncomfortable and Severus could only guess at his apprentice unease before the younger male shook his head firmly and said, even before Severus had a chance to answer.

"I'm sorry; I should probably go before you give me a detention for being tardy. I'll see you after dinner, sir. I'll need to dress warmly and as your apprentice. Don't worry; I'll even try to tame my hair!" And with a cheeky grin, Potter was off.

_Saucy little minx_

Severus shook his head. Sometimes his apprentice baffled him. He sighed and glanced down at his paper. He really hoped that he wouldn't have to spend part of the night talking to Potter about a fear of the dark. Though truly, if anybody had something to fear in the dark, it was Potter, considering how many things had hunted him in the night.

Severus shook himself firmly before he got into the dangerous territory of thinking about Harry bloody Potter and his anxieties and he glanced up towards the clock. He sighed, he had the whole day ahead of him, something he dreaded. So yes, he got to teach both Potions and the Defense Class, a long time heart desire of him, but lately he had been questioning himself if it had been worth it.

Yes, he was free after a fashion for the first time in a lifetime but all the enemies he had acquired and prices he had paid for his mistakes were not light ones. For years he had a goal, to see the Dark Lord fall and now that it was done, he had so much that he wanted to pursue, such as private research but instead he was back at his old job, stuck in a place.

Sure, he had an apprentice but it was somebody that Severus had hated for all his life, a daily reminder of past misdeeds. When he thought of his own apprenticeship and the things he had learned and the fun he had, it seemed highly unlikely that he could give Potter what Severus had been given in that time.

But perhaps there was his error in thinking that Potter needed the same thing. Already, barely two months into the apprenticeship and Potter had improved much. Perhaps the younger male just needed somebody to be there for him and to take care of him. But the closer Severus seemed to get to breaking down Potter's barrier, a new one appeared, more heavily fenced than the one before.

It would take time Severus knew before Potter trusted him. But then there was the general public which believed that either way Severus had hexed the young Gryffindor or Potter had gone daft around the head. It was not beneficial for the trust bond Severus was trying to create.

He sighed, could he really do this? It wasn't an option any longer. It was no longer about a choice. He had chosen to take Potter on for a year and with that came the bad things such as the rumors. And truthfully Severus was a man who was no longer frazzled or scared by the insults hurled his way.

He glanced up at the clock again and cursed. He was late for his classes. This wouldn't do at all. He rose from his desk a little bit too quickly and his head spun so fast that he had to grab a hold of the desk. _If Longbottom had killed the snake, I would have done it myself. Nearly six months and I still haven't fully recovered. This is taking too long_

Having recovered some, he settled his robes about himself dignifiedly and paced towards the door. He fixed his scowl on his face and tried to look impassive. He had a lot of students to frighten today and no amount of trepidation about spending the night with Potter in the Forbidden Forest could quell the slight feeling of lightness in his step.

Hp

The evening rolled around quickly after an eventful day of whispering and being pointed at and Harry was glad that he could leave dinner without having to return to the Common Room. He was getting quite fed up with the whispering behind hands.

He touched his bag, feeling the cloak slide against his fingers as well as the course material of the gloves. He had no idea what Snape had planned except that they would need to go to the forest, something he wasn't too keen on to be truthful.

He sighed. It seemed that everywhere he went there were bad memories for him. A dark reminder of the past May when the days had been at their darkest. He could still clearly remember the feeling of belonging when he had seen his parents there and for one long moment he longed to have that feeling back, to know that everything he had been going through had not been in vain and he could finally rest. He shook his head firmly; he wasn't going to think about that.

With quick and determent steps Harry walked towards Snape's office. His armband hadn't grown warm so he supposed that Snape wasn't feeling particularly vicious today and was giving Harry a little bit of time. That would be a relief.

He arrived outside Snape's office door and knocked. It seemed like a long moment but Harry found the silence relaxing before Snape's soft enter reached his ears and he opened the door, stepping inside. He had expected Snape to be behind his desk grading and so he hadn't been prepared to see the older wizard dressed in his cloak, holding a bag out for Harry to take, all ready to go.

Harry blinked at Snape stupidly as he stared at the silver and dark green scarf that the Slytherin had tied around his throat. "Is something the matter with my appearance, Mr. Potter? Have I passed the inspection and are you ready to be seen in public with me?"

Harry's eyes snapped up to lock with the dark ones but while Snape's voice had been silky the dark eyes were alight with amusement before Snape ordered. "What did you bring with you?"

The older wizard held out his hand for Harry's bag and it was after a moment that Harry handed it over as he said. "I took my gloves, cloak and the knife I use for cutting."

"You won't need your books or a day planner. Did you not return to your dormitory to deliver your books before you came to meet me?" Snape took the books Harry had used for class today out of the bag and put them on his desk, leaving Harry to swallow away his anger when Snape just riffled through his bag without even asking permission.

"No, you told me to meet you straight after dinner."

"No, I did not. I told you to meet me after dinner, leaving you ample time to return your book bag to your dormitory." Harry had to avert his gaze. He knew that if he opened his mouth to ask Snape about the difference between straight after dinner or just after dinner would only result in a bad evening.

So he swallowed away the comment and took a deep, calming breath before he turned back to look at Snape. The older wizard's thin lips curled up slightly and Harry found his own lips mimicking the movement. Snape's magic pulsed against his skin and without a doubt Harry knew that Snape was pleased.

"Well, Mr. Potter, you know that we are going to go into the Forbidden Forest. Regardless of what you may think or believe, the forest is still not a place that is safe but with the proper instructions and the proper respect, you'll come to no harm. You are to stay in sight of me within all times. You will not speak with a loud voice lest we startle anything we don't want to startle. You'll not use magic unless ordered by me or in self defense. The ingredients that we are harvesting tonight are sensitive to magic and the forest has allowed me to harvest them and I would thank you if you were not to let that go to waste or mess it up. You will receive instructions when we are on sight. Do you understand all of that? You will have your wand concealed in your sleeve, ready to draw upon it at the first sight of danger."

_Well this isn't making me feel any more comfortable about venturing into the forest with these rules but I suppose that 20 odd years of harvesting ingredients in the forest Snape knows what he is talking about. __At least I hope so._

"Alright, sir." He merely answered. There wasn't much to say and despite having snitches fluttering in his stomach Harry was keen to be off. This would be a first real lesson with Snape. Sure, his master had him brew potions and teach him about various ingredients but those were things that Harry had also learned in class. He was keen to learn something new, something only a potions apprentice would learn.

"Right, off we are then." Snape finally said, handing Harry back the bag. The older wizard stalked toward the door and held it open so Harry could precede him. Harry waited in the corridor, unsure if they would be using the front door.

Dumbledore had always been explicit that no student was ever allowed in the Forbidden Forest and the only time that Harry had ever seen Snape go in there had been in his first year. Hagrid was the only teacher Harry knew that spend time in the Forest.

But he supposed that there were a lot of ingredients that grew only in the forest. He wondered if they were rare.

"Sir?" He asked, turning towards Snape.

"Yes, Potter?"

"Are there also ingredients that are so rare they cost a fortune and are hard to come by?" Harry could keep up to Snape easily as the older wizard set off towards a side corridor. He walked behind Snape, keeping his eyes firmly upon the straight backed teacher instead of letting them wander around the part of the dungeon he didn't know.

After a long moment Snape answered, his voice the only sound in the dimly lit corridor. "Yes, there are certain ingredients that are rare and cost more than most Potions Masters ever hope of making. The price of these ingredients is regulated by the Guild but they cannot control all the prices since most ingredients are sold on the black market for a higher price than if they were sold through the Guild."

"Such as basilisk scales or fangs?" Snape turned back to look at Harry, one black eyebrow raised before the older wizard sighed and said.

"Yes, Potter, such as ingredients one can harvest from a basilisk."

"Oh it is a good thing that we have got one rotting in the Chamber of Secrets then, isn't it?"

Hp

Severus turned on quick feet, ignoring the flinch Potter displayed as he stepped closer to the smaller wizard and seized him by the front of his robes and hissed. "What did you just say?"

Potter struggled against him and finally whispered, green eyes wide behind his glasses. "I said that there is a basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets?"

"Do you mean that Slytherin's monster was a basilisk? And you expect me to believe that you travelled there in your second year and slayed this monster and came back to tell the tale?"Severus shook his apprentice.

"Yeah, well with help from Fawkes. Without him I would be as dead as the basilisk and the school would have looked very differently." Potter seemed a little bit breathless but the green eyes stared up at Severus, narrowed in anger and Severus remembered himself.

He released Potter quickly and turned away, needing a moment to collect himself as he said. "Come, we've many ingredients to collect and harvest before dawn come."

_Damn Albus for allowing two __teenagers to go down there and to defeat this monster without aid! We should have seen the signs and known that it was a basilisk that was haunting the school. Shame on us for believing Albus' words without questioning them. What a right pair of fools have we been?_

Severus continued to curse not only himself but also the deceased headmaster as they walked over the sloping school ground. He cast a quick glance towards the white tomb that seemed to glow in the moonlight. Severus forced himself to look away and focus upon the looming forest ahead of them.

In all his time that he had been back at Hogwarts, even during the last hard year, he had never been to visit Dumbledore's tomb. Severus knew he wouldn't find any solace there and he refused to stare there, looking at the tomb of the man he had killed. No, his memories were already enough.

He looked behind him to see Potter had paused in the middle of the lawn and was looking at the tomb with an odd expression. Strangely enough Severus felt no annoyance but something else. Pity perhaps, pity for the younger male who had too many tombs and final resting places to visit, finding no relief from the memories in those places of the death and neither with the living.

"If you wish, we can go and visit sometime but not right now. We've got too much to do." Severus made sure his voice was stern but not mean. Potter glanced up towards him, unidentifiable emotions playing over his face as he nodded.

Potter drew closer and Severus gave him a brisk nod as he led the way towards the forest.

"_Lumos!" _He whispered, lighting the tip of his wand. He looked about, holding his wand high. There was not a sound of scurry or leaves behind disturbed and Severus allowed some of the tension he had felt when he entered the forest to flow away.

The forest would not harm them, he knew. He had always shown the proper respect and other than wicked beings in the forest, he would not be harmed when he respected the forest. He hoped he had managed to install the same feeling in Potter.

He glanced at the younger male to see Potter staring towards the darkness. There was a hint of pain in the green eyes but when Potter blinked and focused upon Severus, it was gone. Severus wondered if he had even seen it or imagined it as he snapped out. "Come!"

Hp

Harry looked around as he straightened up from having harvested the asphodel. In the past few hours that they had been in the forest, harvesting different ingredients he had tried, and partly succeeded, in not thinking about the memories that were threatening to resurface.

Close to this place had been the place where he had seen his parents. That was the place where all his struggles had ended and he could finally have peace and be with his family. When Harry had returned to conscious after having been killed by Voldemort, he hadn't focused upon the pain because there had been so much to do but now that he was back here, it stung.

He wanted that peace. He craved it. He wanted to stop struggling and accept his destiny, not being the one who was an exception to everything, including having a family and being killed. Harry knew that there would be a time when the memory wouldn't sting anymore and it would bring him comfort but right now, the ache in his chest only seemed to grow with every breath he took.

It became harder to ignore with each passing moment…

_You know what will ease that ache, don't you? Find the __Resurrection Stone and turn it trice in your hand. You can summon them again and perhaps this time they will take you with them instead of leaving you behind like they've always done. You won't get another chance like this again so why not take it? There is no shame in accepting defeat…._

Harry turned to stare at Snape. The older wizard was on his knees a little ways beyond the clearing and he would no doubt be quick enough if Harry ran away now. Snape had his wand tucked away; using a wizard light to hover above his head as he carefully cut away a flower.

Taking a deep breath, Harry took care to lay the ingredients he had picked and the knife on his bag before he slowly backed away, towards the shadows and the edges. He had a faint idea of where he would run to but he had to be swift.

For a moment he focused upon Snape's face and it tightened something within him as he saw the focused look upon his master's face. Could he do this? Could he really abandon Snape like this? His master would be angry with him that was for sure.

But Harry didn't care any longer.

_Nobody wants you anyway so why should you do as they say and not join the dead? Nobody speaks ill of the dead. Even now that Dumbledore is dead everybody simply praises him instead of acknowledging all the things that he did wrong._

Harry took another deep breath and then turned and ran, fleeing as he could hear Snape curse behind him and bellow out his name. He squeezed his eyes shut, allowing his instincts to guide him as he tried to remember the right path where he had dropped the stone. He would remember, he just had to and all his suffering was over.

He ignored the sounds of somebody following him as he struggled to put distance behind him and Snape. He opened his eyes wide, ignoring the tears that blurred his vision and the happy smile that curled his lips. He would be free and with his parents.

"_Impedimenta!" _

The hex shot beneath Harry's feet and he tripped, falling flat on his face. He lay there, breathing hard as the pain of the impact with the ground rocketed through him as Snape hissed coldly. "Get up!"

A boot nudged him painfully against the ribs, not hard enough to break them but hard enough for Harry to tense up as he managed to push himself up on his knees with shaking arms. Tears were again blurring his vision as he sniffled but this time they were tears of disappointment that his plan hadn't succeeded and he wouldn't get to see his parents.

Was it too much to ask for Harry to see his parents just one more time? It wasn't like he had spent that much time with them. At least Snape had known his parents all through his childhood, but Harry hadn't even been granted that favor. Even Neville could see his parents whenever he wanted to. Sure they were insane and probably didn't recognize him but Harry would even take that.

Anything than knowing that his parents were two skeletons in a grave. He had not even had any pictures of them himself. All the pictures he owned had been given to him by other people, all the stories that he knew were from what other people remembered, tainted by their judgment and their memories.

Harry didn't own one damn thing from his parents. Hell, most people didn't even see him when they saw him. No, they saw James Potter or Lily Potter but not Harry Potter! Everything Harry was reminded other people of his parents but Harry had nothing to remember them by, only ghastly imaginings that were no more real than memories or dreams.

A hand that curled roughly in his dark hair forced him to meet Snape's enraged eyes as he winced. "I knew you were a fool, Potter but I never anticipated that even _you _would be so foolish as to go running all on your own in a dangerous forest when I explicitly told you not to! Were you trying to disobey me on purpose or has something struck your fancy?"

How easy it would be to lie now but Harry knew he didn't have the strength anymore. He couldn't pretend at the scorn and anger he saw in his master before he bowed his head and whispered. "I wanted to see my parents!"

"Potter, your parents are dead!" The icy whisper was harsh but Harry allowed it to flow over him as he whispered.

"With the Resurrection Stone I can bring their spirits back. I just wanted to see them once. Just to tell them that I was sorry that I couldn't join them."

"Potter, what are you muttering about?"

"Before I went to meet Voldemort, they came to collect me and I said that I would join them but Dumbledore told me I should go back and defeat Voldemort. The prophecy stated that I was the only one, so I had to go back…" Harry was hiccupping slightly by the end of the sentence and he couldn't force another word out if his life depended on it.

Suddenly there were hands underneath his armpits that hoisted him up to his feet as Snape snarled. "Stop playing around, Potter! Have you truly learned nothing in all your time here at Hogwarts? There is no spell or trinket that can bring the death back. The death are meant to stay dead! Nothing can replace your parents, not even the ghosts of their spirits! They died so that you could live!"

"Even if that means being haunted by a madman first and then by the memories of what you have done?" Harry asked softly.

"I'm sure that had they known that you would benefit most from their guidance, they would not have risked it. But they did the best they could with the knowledge they had…"

"Did they truly? Did they know that I could be destined to defeat Voldemort if they went into hiding? Did they know that by going into hiding they would attract his attention and that they would not only doom themselves but me as well? Were they the only ones that knew or were the Longbottoms also told of the prophecy?" Harry looked up.

Snape looked down at him and the dark eyes were unreadable as the older wizard said. "They wanted to protect you, Potter. I can understand the desire you had to know them but this desire if futile because it will never come to pass. You have much to live for…"

"I just wish that they were here…" Harry mumbled softly but it didn't seem softly enough because the next moment Snape sighed and said.

"I know, Harry." And that was probably more than Harry was going to get. He knew that Snape understood him. Snape understood the pain of missing somebody and the desire to see them.

"It isn't strange that you would wish for more memories of them but speaking to their ghosts is not the way to do it, Harry! It can be very destructive! If you feel this need again I want you to come to me. I knew both your father and your mother and I have more memories than the ones I gave you. I think that after all you have been through I'll not be too averse to sharing them with you."

Harry glanced up. Snape's eyes were very dark but Harry knew that his master wasn't lying or offering false truths to Harry. No, Snape meant it and Harry's heart broke painfully with the kindness the older wizard was showing him.

He bowed his head and buried his face against Snape's robe, whispering over and over again. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."

And as Snape's hands stroked his back, Harry allowed himself to heal and to calm down.

Hp

_I don't think that I need teardrops for any of my potions. _

Severus' sigh was heavy as he slowly stroked through the messy dark hair underneath his hand. Potter had calmed down considerably but Severus was fighting himself at the moment. A part of him wanted to throw Potter away from him in disgust but the other part never wanted to let go, ever. He wanted to protect and to shield Potter against any misfortune that could befall the young hero.

Potter looked up after a moment, his glasses smudged and his green eyes red rimmed. The younger male sniffled as he fumbled for a handkerchief and blew his nose loudly. Potter shivered and Severus found himself stroking the dark hair away from the lightening bolt forehead to check for a sign of fever, or so he was telling himself.

There were dark smudges on the pale cheeks and Potter scratched at his forehead with his hand, Severus could see small lacerations where Potter had hit the ground after he had cursed him. Making sure that he wasn't going to wet his handkerchief with his wand and wipe them off, Severus stepped back to buy himself time.

"Come, we shall gather the ingredients that we already have and return to the castle. I'll show you how to properly prepare them for storage." Potter nodded and Severus lit his wand. He gestured for Potter to precede him. He wasn't going to make the same mistake again of having Potter flee on him.

The trek back to the place where they had left their supplies was not a long one but Severus made sure to keep a close eye upon Potter. The younger male's shoulders were hunched but Severus could understand the burdens Potter bore.

Was it really so strange for the younger male to want to see his parents? Why hadn't Potter spoken of this before? Surely it had been eating at the younger male.

Severus waved his wand once and collected their supplies. Potter caught his bag without any problems and Severus gestured with his hand towards his apprentice when Potter glanced at him in inquiry. The younger male gave a nod and walked towards the castle, allowing Severus to follow him.

It didn't take long for them to arrive in the corridor outside Severus' office but he bypassed it, enjoying the baffled look on Potter's face as he walked to the unmarked wall and allowed the wards to recognize him. It didn't seem to take long for the wards to come down and the door to his private quarters to appear.

He opened the door and ushered Potter in, even as the younger male stood their gaping. Potter seemed surprised and amazed that Severus could even think of inviting him in. Severus fought the urge to roll his eyes.

His sitting room was immaculate and Potter frowned as he looked at the bookcases that adorned the walls. Severus knew that his collection of rare books preceded even the ones Albus used to have. They had cost him a pretty penny but it was worth it. His books and Potions making skills were one of the things he prided himself on.

"And do you find my quarters to be of your liking?" He sneered as Potter turned to look at him. The younger male smirked as he said. "But of course. As long as I don't find any body parts from previous apprentices and I can change the colors to red and gold, I'm all set."

"Only you would be so cheeky, Mr. Potter to suggest to a Slytherin to change the colors in their own living room." Severus gestured with his hand towards the bag Potter held in his hand and said. "I'll show you how to properly prepare the ingredients first and then we can have some tea."

"So it is potions before snacks?" Potter didn't look put out but he did glance about curiously before he asked. "So in a proper master apprentice setting I would be sharing this space?"

"Yes, you would. You would have your own room and on suite bathroom and share the lab and the living room with your master." Severus shed his cloak as he watched Potter do the same. Mentally preparing himself to teach Potter something, he took a deep breath. Perhaps Potter would pay attention and Severus could be surprised, well you never knew with Gryffindors anyway.

Hp

Harry sighed as he sat down on the couch. His body ached in places that he didn't even know a body could ache in, which for him was saying something since with his record for being hexed and fallen, especially coupled with his childhood, Harry had known many aches.

He settled in obvious comfort on the couch as he reached out for the cup of tea the house elves had delivered to them. Snape was sitting opposite him as the older wizard looked towards the clock before he said. "I've been hearing some strange rumors about you and Mr. Malfoy, Potter."

Harry glanced up from his cup as he leaned over to settle his tea cup back on the table that stood between them. He raised an eyebrow and Snape elaborated. "It seems that I have lost my lover to…" Snape made a face…." Draco Malfoy as many students were so eager to point out to me today. Or to whisper it at me and hope that I would not punish them too severely because I was cross without my favorite Gryffindor."

"Well, I can imagine what may have fuelled such rumors but it would be hardly beneficial for the students to say that you had a favorite Gryffindor, except one to dock points from that is." Harry glanced up, finally making a grab for a biscuit.

"Why yes, then I do have to concur that Mr. Potter is my favorite Gryffindor. Somebody owl the Prophet."

"The Prophet is doing a fine enough job on its own without me owling them with every comment uttered about me. But to reassure you, you've nothing to fear from Malfoy. He just wanted to be friends."

"Just friends?" Snape echoed, his eyebrows tightening in a line.

"Yes, those were his words." Harry bit into the biscuit.

"And you would consider him a friend?"

"I don't know. It is worth a try, isn't it? I mean, according to the other students there isn't a lot I can mess up so why not further damage my image to try and persuade a friendship with Malfoy? It was him that made the first move. He knows that he can't hurt me because it was on my word that he got out from being sent to Azkaban and besides, I don't really think that he would want to try and harm me. Else he does have a very strange way to go about it."

Snape gave a nod and then rose as he said. "Remain here. I need to check the ingredients that I set to boil since they need to be capped and bottled. You may only explore my bookcase; else there will be no browsing. I'll know if you have disobeyed me, Potter!"

Harry knew that the trust Snape was placing upon him by allowing Harry to remain in his private room all by himself was big so he finished another biscuit and a cup of tea before he went to the bookcase. There were lots of books on defense magic and after a lengthy exploration, Harry chose one and settled down upon the couch.

He kicked off his shoes as he got comfortable and engrossed in the book, shuffling around until he was settled on his back with his head on the pillow in the corner. He didn't notice how his eyes drooped or that the book finally came to rest upon his chest as he fell asleep.

Hp

Severus rubbed at his neck as he put the last bottle for the evening away. It had been a long day, especially with having to follow Potter through a jog of the forest. It wasn't something he was keen to repeat. He smiled at the work they had done.

Potter proved himself adept at handling vials and ingredients and Severus knew that soon in the future he could delegate this task to the younger wizard. He walked back to his sitting room, intend on telling Potter as much when he stopped dead in his tracks.

His eyebrows rose at the surprising sight of seeing a sleeping Harry Potter on his couch. The younger wizard was stretched out comfortably against the pillows and the book he had been reading was laying on his chest with Potter's hands folded over it.

Potter appeared more relaxed than Severus had ever seen him and slowly Severus approached the couch. He plucked the book away, causing Potter to tense up as the younger male whispered. "I'll put it back immediately, Uncle Vernon."

"Don't worry, Harry. I'll put it back for you."

"But….you're not uncle Vernon?"

"No, Harry, I'm Severus…"

"Okay…good." Harry curled on his side and Severus quickly plucked the glasses off to fold them neatly and to lay them on the table. He summoned a blanket and laid it over Potter, for a moment stroking the dark hair away as, instead of flinching, Potter leaned into his touch.

Severus snatched his hand away after a moment, shaking his head. He strode to his bedroom, growling softly to himself but he couldn't help but leave the door open slightly so he could hear it if Potter was distressed.

_What is Potter doing to me?_

Hp

_I fell asleep on Snape's couch and he let me sleep there, not even grumbling about it in the morning. He even tucked a blanket around me._

Harry's thoughts kept returning to the rather pleasant night he had spent on Snape's couch. His night had been nightmare free for the first time in weeks and Harry was unsure of what to contribute this to. Snape could have just spiked his tea with a dreamless sleep potion. Harry wouldn't put it past his master to do so.

He glanced up at the blackboard for the next ingredient for the potion they were brewing today. Slughorn was walking around the classroom, observing everybody. The older wizard seemed slightly nervous but Harry was unsure why.

Had the previous year taken out so much of the Potions Master? He glanced down when a splash sounded. There was something floating in his cauldron and Harry barely had a moment to feel the horror wash over him as his cauldron emitting a high screech, exploded.

Screams erupted around the classroom but as Harry was blasted back from his cauldron, the warm liquid splashing over him and he breathed in the foul steams that erupted from the cauldron as it toppled over on top of him, he didn't even know that it was him that uttered them as his lungs seemed to explode with pain and breathing became incredibly hard as he lost consciousness.

**Ah, a cliffy. I'm evil. I hope you liked it. Review of course. Yes, I know I didn't fully did as I promised but my muse took over. **

**The next chapter: The bond flaring in his mind, Severus rushes to the Hospital Wing but what will he find? Will Harry be alright or will this explosion draw friends and former enemies together at his bedside? Will Severus find the one responsible and will he be able to keep his temper? That and more in: Actions. **


	14. Actions

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thank you so much for the reviews. I'm glad that everybody liked it. It has been so busy this past month that I haven't been able to update as I wanted to update but anyway, let's begin.**** Harry is drugged in this chapter so he may seem out of character. **

It was the long moment when everything became silent, the silence before the storm as some called it, that Severus frowned as he looked around the classroom. Something was wrong but he couldn't decipher what it was. Then everything happened at once.

The apprenticeship bond in his mind flared to life with an excruciating force that sent spikes of pain through his head. The bracelet on his arm tingled with wild magic before becoming completely silent, not even a whisper of Potter's magic.

He frowned down at the bracelet, something had happened, something bad.

He glanced back up towards the class before he growled, not trying to show how worried or annoyed he was because Potter was drawing attention to himself again. "Class dismissed!"

The students were merely staring at each other dumbly before Severus snapped, losing the last of his patience. "Well go on! Or have your brains evacuated the room? I said class dismissed!" The students scattered from his temper and within a moment the room was empty.

Severus sat down at his desk and raised his wand to tap the bracelet to contact Potter. There wasn't even a whisper of magic that would normally flare to indicate Potter had received his message. He waited for a response, ignoring the buzzing in his head before he stood up.

He walked to the door of the classroom to close it for the day but as a student passed and whispered to his friend. "Have you heard what happened in Slughorn's class? There was an explosion and…"

His breathing left him in a huge gasp when the screaming of the bond in his head suddenly made sense as did the bracelet that went dead. He must have paled considerably because the students were looking at him oddly but Severus didn't care as he gathered his wits and ran, something very bad had happened to Potter and his apprentice had need of him.

Hp

When he arrived in the corridor outside the Potions classroom there was pandemonium with students walking about, trying to peer past the wards that had been hastily erected. Severus pushed past them and he wordlessly cast a bubblehead charm as his sensitive nose caught the acid smell of a potion that had gone wrong.

The moment he stepped through the wards he cancelled the charm as his nose caught the scent of purified air. He should have known that Poppy would not allow the students to come to any harm. The acid smell must come from the cauldron that had most likely melted.

Taking a deep breath that did nothing to ease his nerves Severus stepped into the destroyed classroom. He blanched and had to reach out to steady himself against the doorframe when he saw the mess that the potion had made but it wasn't the worst. No, the worst was the young male lying in the middle of the classroom on his side.

Potter couldn't be mistaken because of the messy hair, even if it was currently one of the very few things recognizable except for the Gryffindor's clothing. Potter's cheeks, arms and hands were bright red and blistered and the eyes were tightly squeezed shut.

There were lacerations covering the red cheeks that oozed blood and some liquid Severus couldn't identify and he didn't need to see the ruined frames of Potter's glasses besides the younger male's trembling blistered fingers to know that there was a good chance Potter's glasses had exploded in the heat of the blast.

But it wasn't the worst thing. The thing that made Severus afraid suddenly was when he realized that he could hear Potter wheezing for breath through cracked and blistered lips. He inched closer, trying not to get in the way of Poppy as she crouched beside the younger male and ran her wand over him.

"What has happened?" Even his voice was shaky and Severus cleared his throat. His first instinct was to move closer and he finally did so, dropping to his knees behind Potter. He reached out with a trembling hand to touch Potter's hair and Poppy nodded at him, encouraging him to touch the young male and to reassure himself Potter was alive. His hand finally settled in the thick hair and Severus began carding his fingers through it, remembering how Potter had grown calm during the two times Severus had held him. Perhaps Potter knew he was there.

"Somebody threw something in Harry's cauldron and the potion reacted and exploded. From what I gather, the ingredient reacted chemically with the ingredients used in this particular potion but anyway…" Poppy's voice shook and Severus glanced up. He had never seen her so upset before but her eyes were focused upon Potter as she whispered.

"There are second degree burns on his face, arms and hands. He breathed in the fumes through his nose and mouth which means that his mouth and airway are burned as well. I purified the air around him immediately but I'm not sure how much damage has been done to his lungs or if it will be permanent. His glasses broke and the shards must have been pushed into his eyes but I cannot assess the damage yet…."

Poppy's voice broke as she whispered. "Oh, Severus, Harry was doing better and now this? Who would do such a thing that they would willingly endanger him?"

It was a question to which Severus had no answer to. He drew in a shaking breath as he whispered. "For the love of Merlin, pull yourself together, Poppy. I know that the situation is dire but Potter needs you. You cannot fall to pieces now. Now, tell me, Potter is unconscious but what will happen when he wakes up?"

"He needs to be given a sleeping draught. I will be required to give him Dreamless Sleep but perhaps it is better if we can spell it directly into his stomach since I do not want to aggravate his throat any further and possibly cause a permanent injury." Severus gave a nod and dug into his pocket. He had a vial of Dreamless Sleep here somewhere and while it was not that much, they could always give Potter more in the Hospital Wing.

"What would be the best way to move him? The floo may aggravate his throat further with all the ash." Severus didn't glance down once. He didn't want to have this picture in his mind of Potter with swollen eyes and red blistered cheeks.

"I'll give you my portkey that I can activate in emergencies. It is usually used when there is a life threatening injury on the Quidditch field or somewhere on the school grounds and it would take too much time to walk back to the Hospital Wing. It will dispose us directly in the Hospital Wing and I will create a protective bubble around you both while I go and prepare a private room."

Poppy's voice was professional and Severus nodded again. His mind was still stuck on the vision that he had seen when he had entered the room.

"Have you contacted Minerva?" He asked instead. It wouldn't do to dwell on whatever had taken place here. His place was with his apprentice now and he should trust in the Headmistress to make sure that the one who was responsible was detained.

"Yes, Horace contacted her directly…"

"Speaking of Horace, where is he?" Severus' voice dropped. He glanced around the classroom, expecting his old mentor to be hiding in some corner, impossible with that size as it was.

"He is out in the hall after having secured the area and sheparding the students out. He is a right nervous wreck."

"Why would he be a wreck? He isn't the one who is lying on the floor." Severus snapped. His hand tangled in the thick hair underneath his hand.

"Well, he was already nervous this morning because it was the first class that the seventh year Gryffindor and Slytherin students were together. He was afraid that something might happen and now look, he was right. Something did happen."

"Well, we do not have the time to worry about whatever Horace thought that would happen. We need to get Potter to the Hospital wing." Severus would deal with Slughorn later. He had always known the older wizard had turned a certain blind eye towards actions in his classroom, especially to students he liked but not see it when somebody threw something dangerous in another cauldron.

Severus had always been accused that he was too strict in his class and often too hard on his students but his famous temper had managed to keep things like this from happening in his classroom. Sure, there was the occasional cauldron explosion but never an accident of this magnitude.

And now, now his apprentice had gotten hurt. Severus looked down as he stroked the hot forehead underneath his hand. He knew without a doubt that this wasn't some harmless prank. Potter had been picked for a reason and Severus was going to find out what it was, he owed it to Potter!

"Severus, I'm going to go ahead and prepare a room for Harry with the necessary equipment and the purified air. I think that it is the best if we keep him in a separate room until we are sure that Harry will make a full recovery and we can protect him to the best of our abilities. Hold this chain and it will activate in two minutes. I'll have everything ready when you arrive."

Severus nodded as he wrapped the chain carefully around Potter's fingers. He stroked the messy hair again and leaned down to say. "Do not worry. I will not leave you, no matter if this takes all night. You will not be alone."

And even though Severus knew it was going to be a long night, he just didn't know how long it was going to be.

Hp

Waking up was agony but he could focus beyond the pain for a moment. It was no more than he was used to. He woke up aching every time in his cupboard but something was wrong this time, it was too dark and he could barely breathe. He couldn't see anything, not even a blur of a shadow; it was so dark that it was nearly frightening.

His breathing sped up, fueling an unfamiliar ache in his chest that was so different from when Dudley had kicked him and he had broken a rib. He was beginning to panic. His fingers clenched in unfamiliar sheets, clean sheets and Harry tried very hard to remember where he was or what could have happened but his mind felt muddled as if he had taken a potion. It felt much the same after he had taken that Dreamless Sleep.

That knowledge did little to ease the panic that was rising in his chest as he struggled for breath. There was an unfamiliar pressure upon his hand and then a voice murmured through the darkness. "Easy, Potter, you are in the Healing Wing and…"

_No, __I'm back in my cupboard and now I'm dreaming of Professor Snape…Something must have happened in the last Potions class of term and I've been injured. I remember a splashing cauldron and hot liquid…_

The pressure on his hand withdrew and the magic that had accompanied the touch, familiar magic, magic Harry was used to feeling upon his skin, left him as well, sending him into another wave of panic. He flexed his hand, moaning when pain flared across his palm. Moaning hurt as well but then there were warm fingers on his own as the voice said again, Harry struggling to open his eyes and to focus.

"Do not struggle, Potter! You have been wounded and Madam Pomfrey has given you a potion that has clearly clouded your mind. You may be a little bit disoriented but do not fight sleep…"

But Harry wasn't feeling sleepy. There was a heavy exhaustion that dragged down his limbs but the panic that was clouding his mind at the very thought of being locked back in the dark in his cupboard was blocking that out. He turned his head, struggling to see even the smallest shred of light but there was none and Harry tried to open his eyes but he couldn't and everything remained dark.

He opened his mouth to say something but he flinched when his voice merely came out as a croak, hurting his throat so badly that he nearly choked. "Can't see…" His throat hurt from speaking.

He hiccupped and choked upon his breathing as his throat and lungs felt like they were on fire. He cried out, the sound a low keen of pain as he fought against the blankets that were wrapped so tightly around his body that he felt like he was trapped.

He didn't believe the voice that told him he was in the Hospital wing. He had always been pain free when he was in the Hospital wing and there was a particular smell of cleaning supplies and potions that was absent. He tried to inhale but the air was odor and scentless and Harry choked upon the clean air.

He began to cough, a harsh whacking sound that sent all his nerves on fire as he tried to regain control of his breathing. His eyes were smarting fiercely because of the bitter and salty tears as Harry flailed on his bed. His hand brushed something warm and he curled his fingers around it, ignoring the faint hiss of sharp pain close by.

He turned blindly towards the person sitting close by, still coughing harshly as he tried to beg the person to help him. A wave of familiar magic washed over him and a voice said. "Just relax and breathe in and out…in and out…."

Harry was too far gone in his panic even when he tried to focus upon the voice that supplied him with instructions but his mind was too fuzzy to truly focus upon anything else but the breathing that refused to come.

"Oh, for the love of Merlin, Potter, even you could muck up something as easily as breathing…"

The harsh whisper made Harry flinch away from the hand that stroked his hair away from his sweaty forehead. Before he even knew what he was saying he whispered in between coughs. "Sorry…uncle…Vernon…will try…not to be…a freak….anymore…."

Somebody exhaled harshly close by and then gentle hands that belied the gruff tone eased him up as Harry coughed so hard his very lungs hurt…"Despite everything, you are not a freak, Harry. I suppose after everything you've been through today I should have realized that you would be disoriented because of the potion and the purified air is irritating your healing airway and your lungs. Now allow me to help you…"

The voice fell away but Harry was eased down against a hard body as the sheets were pulled away roughly. He could hear a soothing heartbeat underneath his ear as one hand came to rest upon his stomach and the other arm draped over his shoulders before the hand came to rest upon his head, applying a firm but gentle pressure until Harry obeyed and laid his head down against the firm chest underneath his ear.

Appearing satisfied the person stroked his hair for a moment before the voice instructed. "Focus upon my breathing, Harry and match your own with mine. You can feel your head rise as I inhale and fall back as I exhale. All I want you to do is to focus upon your breathing and upon my voice. We shall cover everything else later. Breath in…"

Harry could feel his head rise as he forced himself to think past the pain, the fear and the darkness to focus upon the voice as he inhaled a sharp breath. He coughed as he choked but exhaled as the familiar voice instructed.

"Breath in…and out…."

The first few breaths burned and Harry feared he was going to break into more coughing but the heavy feeling in his chest was beginning to disappear as with each passing breath his lungs and airway became more accustomed to the purified air.

His panic was beginning to settle and Harry could focus on the warm hand that stroked his stomach and the other hand that lay in his hair, pushing his head back. The voice that rumbled underneath his head was so soothing and the magic that seemed to embrace him was so familiar that Harry closed his eyes and slowly began to relax.

"Very good, Harry. You are doing very well. Just keep to the rhythm. Do you know who I am?"

Slowly opening his mouth Harry tried to form the words but they wouldn't come. His throat was parched dry and Harry licked his lips. A wand tip was set at his lips and somebody whispered. "_Aguamenti." _

A thin stream of water passed Harry's lips and he swallowed gratefully. He moved one arm and shuffled a little bit until his leg was pressed against a firm thigh and he could slip an arm around the waist underneath his head as he whispered sleepily. "Sev'rus."

There was a soft chuckle as the hand stroked his hair and Snape whispered as Harry drifted off. "Sev'rus indeed, Mr. Potter…but have no fear, I'll punish you later when you are in a fit enough state to appreciate it. Go to sleep, safe in the knowledge that I'll keep watch and nobody can get access to you."

And it was the safest Harry had felt in a long time.

Hp

Poppy Pomfrey was a calm woman and a professional mediwitch. She always kept her cool, even in the direst of circumstances. She hadn't survived two wars by doing anything else and managed to successfully treat so many casualties.

But now, as the monitor charm she had placed on Harry Potter's bed to wake her if her patient was in any distress went off, she was slightly panicking. She knew how sensitive a person was who had been burned and while she had tried her best to heal Harry, his throat and airway needed time to recuperate.

She had warded the private room he was in heavily so that nobody could harm him further but the chance for an infection was high. She pulled on her dressing gown and slippers as she hasted towards his bedside at the room on the other side of the ward.

Her footsteps were muffled as she hurried towards the open door. She slowed her steps at the whispered voice that came from beyond the curtain. Pulling out her wand, she peered inside as she inched closer into the room.

What she saw surprised her greatly. She nearly dropped her wand even when her mouth curled into an unexpected smile. Harry wasn't alone anymore, the stubborn man she had sent to bed hours ago had returned. _Sneaky spy. _She thought fondly.

Severus Snape was a man of many surprises but somebody who truly knew him could never be surprised to the lengths the man would go for those he called his own. And she should have seen this coming, Harry Potter was his apprentice after all and Severus was dedicated to his craft.

She leaned against the doorframe as she watched the man who was hailed as Death Eater and a monster by many, stroke the dark hair away from the troubled face of his apprentice. Harry was snuggled into Severus' side, his face pressed against the man's chest as Severus counted off the breaths.

But much to her surprise was the heavily bandaged arm that had snuck around Severus' waist without his knowledge. The dark haired man was so focused upon his task that he hadn't noticed her standing here.

Severus' dark eyes were hungrily searching Harry's face for any signs of distress and after a lengthy study of Severus' face, Poppy did the same. What she saw made her breathe easier. Harry had been in distress but whatever it had been, had passed now, with the close proximity of his master here.

She smiled and snuck away, silently vowing to herself that after a cup of much needed tea she would come back to check upon the two men but for the moment, Severus had everything under control and she was going to be damned if she would destroy this moment between them because despite everything Severus had done in the past, he and Harry deserved every peaceful moment they could get.

Hp

Poppy sat down at her desk with the steaming mug in front of her and her thoughts on the mysterious man that was Severus Snape. She had known him when he had been a student at this institute and she had seen how defensive and lonely he had been during his school years. She had tried to make him feel better whenever he ended up in her care after he had been harmed by his peers or a prank that had gone wrong.

But much to her regret he had never confided in her, in anybody for that matter. There had been his friendship with Lily Evans but it had seemed that it had fallen apart not too long after a prank James Potter and his friends had played on Severus.

She had seen Severus return to teach, a broken man in many ways. The passion that had always driven him seemed to have disappeared and there had been many years in his first years as a Potions Master that Poppy had wanted to give the Head of Slytherin house a big hug.

It had been one of the many discussions between herself and Minerva in the Staff Room and she had been happy to see that Severus had warmed up to the Scottish witch and had accepted her friendship.

She had seen the younger man blossom during his time here, even when Harry Potter had come to this school. He may have hidden it well, but she had seen how Severus protected Harry even when he detested the boy. She understood the reason now why he had hated Harry for all these years but it still wasn't healthy to transport the feelings for the boy's sire to the boy himself.

But it seemed that somewhere along the way, Severus had begun to see that Harry was not James nor was he Lily, he was his own person and he deserved to be seen as such. Poppy had never tried to encourage a friendship between the two males, not like she had seen Albus do on countless occasions.

Severus was too much of an arse sometimes, too stubborn for his own good. He only believed what he saw with his own eyes and Poppy was glad that he had chosen to see Potter as his own person. The apprenticeship bond between them was working out far better than she had hoped.

Of course she had her objections to the bond when Minerva had suggested it but she also knew of Harry's ability to understand a person who had undergone similar trauma as he had. She knew the younger male understood Severus, far better than the Potions Master could ever see himself. She wondered if Albus had seen the same thing but she dismissed that thought immediately.

She knew that it merely soothed Albus' Gryffindor conscious if the two males he had manipulated for so many years would find solace with each other. But Albus hadn't counted on what these two had seen and done, he had never been one to walk the knife's edge between darkness and light as these two had been forced to do.

This was perhaps one of the many reasons that Harry could understand Severus. True, Poppy couldn't even imagine what Severus had done and seen in his time as a spy but if there was somebody who could sympathize and perhaps offer healing it was Harry.

Yes, he was a reminder of Severus' past but he was also a promise for a future because anybody who looked at Harry Potter would know that he had defeated the darkness and who couldn't find hope in that?

Poppy's lips eased in a smile as she took a sip of her tea. She knew that Harry could bring out the lighter side in Severus. The very arrival of the Boy Who Lived in Hogwarts had relit Severus' passion, even if it was on how to dock the most points from Gryffindor. It was much better to see Severus Snape in a rage than the empty shell of the man she had known for so many years.

And now…now Severus seemed even healthier than ever. He walked with a spring in his step and even the harsh lines in his face were easing. Just a couple of days ago he had spoken to her about his research and she knew that he reveled in the fact of having an apprentice, even when that apprentice was Harry Potter.

She knew that Harry would show Severus what it was like to smile again just as Severus would show Harry what it was like to feel safe with somebody. Poppy smiled, perhaps they would benefit from this apprenticeship after all.

Finishing her tea, Poppy rose. She had spent enough time away from the bed. Perhaps she could persuade Severus to get some sleep of his own. No doubt when the morning came, Harry's friends would be here as well and she knew without a doubt that she needed somebody who was capable of scaring those students away.

Harry wasn't up for visitors and the next few days were going to be critical for his health. He would need to remain in the chamber until his airway and lungs had healed. She sighed; she wondered who had done this.

She exited her office and paused in her step, listening for the deep baritone that told her if Severus was still talking to Harry. Her monitor charm hadn't gone off so she assumed that Severus' presence had calmed Harry down enough for him to give into the potion and get some much needed rest.

She walked on silent feet towards Harry's room, her wand held in front of her. Severus was paranoid at the best of times and it wasn't the first time that she had to dodge a hex when he was surprised by her presence.

But this time when she froze in surprise it was for a whole different reason than seeing the impossible man in bed with his apprentice, calming him down. No, this time it was because, and Poppy conjured a camera to snap a picture, Severus was fast asleep with Harry in his arms.

The Potions Master was lying in the same position that she had left them but this time Severus had shuffled the pillows a little so he could rest his head against them as he watched the messy head buried against his chest. Poppy smiled at the endearing picture.

Severus' legs were stretched out beside Harry as he lay on his side, his eyes closed and his face relaxed in the most peaceful slumber Poppy had ever seen him. Harry's breathing was even and the arm that had snuck around Severus' waist was still there as if Harry didn't want Severus to leave.

The elegant hands of the older wizard were partly hidden by the way Harry had curled up against his master but Severus' other hand was resting in the dark hair as he pressed Harry's head against his chest.

Poppy couldn't help herself as she snapped another picture. The opportunity was just too perfect to allow it to pass. After carefully snapping pictures to her heart's content, and some blackmail material towards Severus and a present for Minerva, Poppy put the camera away with a smile.

She raised her wand and swirled it and a blanket rose from a nearby bed to cover the two men upon the bed, carefully tucking the edges in around them. She turned on her feet to exit the room and get some much needed rest herself when Harry mumbled. "Who...is…?"

"Just go back to sleep, Mr. Potter, it is Madam Pomfrey…."

"Who is in bed…?"

"Do not aggravate your throat further, Harry. Your master is right beside you so you need not fear. Go back to sleep, dear and allow yourself to heal."

Harry mumbled something else but he snuggled back down underneath the blanket and Poppy watched but it wasn't long until Harry fell back asleep and Poppy left, warding the room because she knew that nothing would harm these two men tonight as they slept a deserved peaceful sleep.

Hp

Normal mornings in the Hospital Wing were a quiet affair as Poppy checked upon the students to see how they had made it through the night and administered potions and brought breakfast to those who were awake, only this morning however, it was not so quiet.

"What the hell are you doing here, Ferret?" Ronald Weasley had his wand raised and pointed directly at Draco Malfoy, who had slipped into the room behind them. His girlfriend, Hermione Granger was looking between the two boys as Malfoy raised his empty hands.

"The same as you, Weasley, awaiting news of Potter."

"Oh, is that what you're doing here, hoping that he is in lots of pain so that you can go and tell the whole bloody school about it and get a good kick out of his suffering?" Ronald's face was purple with rage as he stepped closer to the slightly smaller male.

"And why would I do that? I'm here because I'm worried about him…"

"You don't even know Harry!"

"Or are you jealous perhaps that he may have another male friend who cares for his safety?" Draco's voice was soft but the taunt was evident. Hermione shook her head sharply before she laid a hand on Ron's tense shoulder before her boyfriend could snap out another thing without thinking as she stepped forward and said.

"Look, I know that you spoke to Harry earlier and stood up for him to Ginny but still…you hated him for seven years, Malfoy, it is very strange for you to suddenly turn over a new leaf and start caring. You've to understand that we're a bit protective and curious."

"Of course I do, Granger, it would have been bad if you hadn't been. I heard about the explosion and well…I was worried. I was sincere in my offer of friendship to Potter. I know that it may seem strange but he has done much for me when he didn't have to. He could have left me to die last year but he didn't. He could have allowed my mother to go to Azkaban but he didn't. I owe him and if it means that I can be there for him as a friend, then so be it."

"When did you become so mature, Draco?" Hermione smiled and held out her hand as she added. "A friend of Harry's is a friend of us. But be warned, if you hurt him in any way, I'll punch you harder than in third year and I'm sure you remember that, right?"

Draco paled before he smiled tentatively and said. "Yes, I do. You have a mean right hook for a mugg….uhm a girl."

Ron was staring between them in a rather confused manner. Hermione glanced back at him and softly whispered in his ear as she drew closer to his side. "Just give it a chance for Harry, Ron. He can use all the support he can get."

Ron's sharp eyes locked with her own but Hermione refused to back down. She had seen how Harry had suffered from all the comments the other students had whispered to him. While many were glad that Voldemort was gone, some couldn't help but blame Harry for the fact that their loved ones had died.

It wasn't fair, Hermione knew. Harry was beating himself up enough over the deaths he couldn't prevent or couldn't have helped the people anyway without anybody else whispering to him about it. She wondered at the strange behavior of Slughorn as well. Yesterday when Ron and she had been summoned to McGonagall's office, Slughorn had been there and he had been nervous as hell.

During the sixth year the Potions Master had doted upon Harry and she remembered being jealous of the attention and the grades Harry had received, especially because he hadn't done anything to warrant it. But now Slughorn would rather not be associated with Harry. Of course the old wizard would be nervous for Harry to be in his class with Slytherin, Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff students but still, nobody had wanted to harm Harry, or so she had thought.

Ron looked around and said. "Where is Madam Pomfrey when you need her? I want to see Harry…"

"Unfortunately, Mr. Weasley, you cannot see Mr. Potter at the moment." Poppy stepped out of her office, where she had been watching the interaction between the two students. She stepped closer as the three seventh year students turned to regard her.

They all looked so different but they were united here with the same goal, to see how a friend was. Weasley opened his mouth and Poppy raised her hand as she said.

"Please let me explain. Mr. Potter is kept under a sedative to give his lungs and throat time to heal. I have placed him in a special room in which the air is purified by a charm every 15 minutes but it is still very dangerous for somebody besides myself and Professor Snape, who have both been disinfected by potions to be around him. He can easily catch an infection and become worse. I'm sorry but I cannot allow you to visit him right now. You will have to wait at least 48 hours before we can see how much he has improved."

Ron opened his mouth but once again Hermione beat him to it as she whispered, horrified. "Is he going to be alright?"

"We certainly hope so, Miss Granger. Whatever had been tossed into his cauldron reacted negatively with the ingredients used in the potion and the very fumes turned acid. The cauldron toppled over and not only fell on top of Mr. Potter but he breathed in the fumes and was covered in hot liquid. He has got second degree burns on his arms and face, the shards of his glasses exploded in his eyes and he has breathed in the toxic fumes of a dangerous potion. It would not only be in his best interests if you did not visit him right now but also in your own."

Hermione raised her hands to her face, suddenly white as Ron wrapped an arm around her shoulder to support her. The tall red head was pale himself as he whispered. "Who would do such a thing?"

"I know who would…" Draco's voice was extremely soft and Poppy turned to stare at the young Malfoy heir.

"Then pray tell, Draco, who did?" A silky voice filled with barely suppressed rage filled the silence and Poppy turned to see Severus Snape advancing on his Slytherin. The black eyes shot fire and despite that Severus was dressed in a button down crisp black shirt and black trousers, he struck an imposing figure.

The grey eyes of Draco rose up to meet the black ones of his Head of House as he whispered. "Dennis Creevey, sir."

**I bet that you didn't expect that:P. Well, **

**I hope that you liked it and that it was worth the wait. So what should happen now? Let me know. **

**In the next chapter: Will Severus' temper hold or will he commit a deadly mistake when he is presented with not only Dennis Creevey but also of a certain ex of Harry who decides to come peeking at the wounded wizard now that he is interesting again? And will Harry recover or will Ginny's visit worsen his condition? And what will happen to Dennis Creevey and above all, what was his reason for injuring Harry? That and more in: Reasoning. **


	15. Reasoning I

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thank you so much for the reviews. Two of my fest fics are out now, go and check them out. More drama is ahead but let's begin.**

"Sure you are kidding me!" The unexpected shout from Ronald Weasley drew a glare from Severus. The Potions Master bristled as he narrowed his dark eyes at Weasley.

"And what is just so bloody funny that you think that Draco would joke about a matter like this? He knows not to make false accusations." Severus growled his voice low in his throat. Trust in a Weasley to add insult to injury. As if a Gryffindor wasn't capable of such a crime as to purposely poison somebody's cauldron, bloody Black had fed him to a werewolf.

"I didn't mean it like that, sir. I just never imagined that Dennis would do such a thing. He was always very quiet and never bothered Harry at all, unlike his older brother."

"But his older brother died in the final battle because Harry didn't surrender himself. I mean, grief can be a strong stimulant to suddenly show a different behavior."

"He could have hated Harry for years if that was all that Colin mentioned during the summer and the holidays." Ronald answered to Granger's suggestion.

"We can speculate all we want to the brat's reasoning but I want to know what the hell he was doing in the Potions class when it was a seventh year class. Creevey should be in his 5th or 6th year. He had no business there." Severus had to think hard to remember the small boy. Creevey had never stood out to him. He always worked hard and kept his head down, getting excellent grades in Potions, one of the only few students that Severus felt sad to see leave him when he had gotten his OWLS. He hadn't been an exceptionally student but Severus knew that if Dennis had wanted to get an NEWT in Potions then he could have applied himself to the material and he would have gotten the grade.

The young Gryffindor had never been passionate but he had a clever mind and he showed a hidden logic that he never displayed out in the open but his reasoning was sound. Severus could tell that much from his essays and exams. Why would such a young man throw his future away?

He fixed Draco with a glance and asked. "Apart from his reasoning, how did he possibly have access to those ingredients and know which one to use? He was a clever enough student but none other than a Potions Master knew those ingredients would react in such a way. Potter was targeted for a reason and the attack was thought out and planned. It was not a spur of the moment decision."

Draco shuffled his feet and finally he said, in an uncharacteristicly quiet voice and an insecure shuffle. "I believe that Professor McGonagall told us that Creevey was Professor Slughorn's student."

The blond Slytherin looked at Granger and Severus spun around. He kept his temper in check, Harry was suffering and he still wasn't any closer to answer than he had been two hours ago. Granger looked away and she chewed on her lip, casting huge eyes upon Severus before she said. "Yes, she did say that. I asked her about Dennis because well, we all knew Colin and she said that he had been placed with Professor Slughorn…I don't know why…"

_But I know somebody who does. _

His face set in a stern line he turned on a quick heel to go towards the private office of Poppy. But it seemed like the mediwitch had been ahead of him because he could hear the soft conversation. He crossed his arms over his chest and then glanced towards the black door to where Harry slept. His arms tingled from where he had held his apprentice but Severus refused to let the worry show. He couldn't afford to lose it in front of his students. And besides, Harry was going to be fine, wasn't he? And despite wanting to believe so badly Severus found there was a tingle of fear in his belly

Hp

Minerva looked pale and shaken, tired and finally she looked her age. It was strange that she had survived two wars, seen countless horrors and now when a student had been attacked she looked like she wanted to crawl into bed and sleep for the next fortnight. Or perhaps she wanted to transform and go and sit down in the sun, to live the simple life of a cat. She looked like Severus felt. But he had learned at such a young age that to show his feelings was to show weakness and people could hurt him that way.

He accepted the cup of tea Poppy handed him and looked around at their little gathering. They had gathered on several beds that stood at the end of the ward.

Weasley lay sprawled long limbed on a bed, Granger beside him as Draco sat down on the edge of the bed. His grey eyes sought out Severus and the older wizard raised an eyebrow. Did Draco really think that Severus would blame him for giving him this information? He may not always be fair and he may sometimes let his temper rule him but he would never lash out if he could help It.

No he would instead let the anger fester and get his revenge on Dennis. That boy would pay for hurting his apprentice. Severus glanced to the other side of the beds to Poppy and Minerva. The Headmistress was looking away as she blew into her tea cup and took a sip. It was almost as if she felt Severus' dark eyes on her face because she looked up and said.

"I cannot imagine that Dennis would do such a thing…"

"Is it because he is a Gryffindor and a Gryffindor would never do such a thing? Have you forgotten Black, Minerva?" Severus knew it may be unfair but he was seething suddenly. He was annoyed; it was like the werewolf incident all over again. Of course Minerva couldn't imagine that her sweet Gryffindor could do such a thing. No, it was only evil Slytherins who would come up with an ingenious plan like this to take revenge…

"I did not say that, Severus. I understand that you are upset and I do not blame you but if you would be so kind as to hold your temper in check and allow me to adjust to this piece of information before you leap to conclusions." Minerva's voice was as sharp as a whip as was her glance. Severus looked away, chastened. He sighed, and finally ran a hand over his face and through his hair. It didn't matter that these three students saw him without his mask, in rumpled clothes and with greasy hair and added lines in his face. They had seen enough to realize that these things were stressful.

To be truthful Granger and Weasley didn't look like they had slept either. What was it like to know that one of your best friends was lying in that room beyond and where you could not go in to see him and convince yourself he may be alright? He himself had barely kept it together and only knowing that Harry was bandaged up and the worst injuries had been hidden made Severus stay at his bedside. He had seen some gruesome things in his time but for some reason seeing his apprentice laying there was enough to bring the fury back to his veins and he was a breath away from picking up his wand and cursing Dennis Creevey into next week.

"How is Harry?" Poppy took a deep breath before she said, aware that she had the attention of every person in the room.

"He is doing alright under the circumstances. It is too early to assess the damage done to his throat and lungs. He is still drugged with the Dreamless Sleep but I'm going to switch to another potion soon. The burns on his hands and face are healing. I do hope that I can assess his eyes today but he isn't in any pain and he is sleeping peacefully. He has made it through the first night without incidents except that he work up disoriented but that was dealt with quickly. If we can keep him in the room and undisturbed for the next few days then it should minimalize the change of Harry catching an infection. It will help his healing tremendously."

Severus glanced at Granger to see that Weasley had shuffled around and had his arm wrapped around the trembling girl. She sat hunched over, shaking as Weasley whispered in her ear, his own faraway look in his blue eyes. Severus felt as if he was intruding in something private. What was he doing here? He didn't even care about Potter. He just didn't want to see his apprentice injured…

He straightened up. He made a promise not to leave Potter alone and he wouldn't do such a thing. Potter was his apprentice and perhaps out of duty or not, Severus really wanted to be there for the younger man.

"Let us steer away from Potter and talk about Mr. Creevey." He finally said, clearing his throat.

Weasley sat up straighter, though his arm remained around Grangers shoulder as he said. "Yeah, I want to know the same thing. Why was Dennis in that class in the first place? Draco said that he saw Dennis do."

Minerva fixed the youngest Malfoy with a glance as she said. "Would you be willing to testify that under Veritaserum and allow us to view the memory in the Pensive?"

Draco looked pale but he nodded nevertheless when he glanced up at Severus who nodded back. He glanced back at Minerva as she cleared her throat and said.

"When I first introduced the idea of having tutors help the children, I had children such as Harry, you yourselves or Dennis Creevey in mind. Children who had been affected in the war and lost loves ones. I send out the usual letters for school, inviting the fifth years and up to comment on the idea of having tutors. I did not receive many replies, as you can see that not many new students attended the school this year, but I did receive one request from Dennis Creevey. He asked if he could be tutored by Professor Slughorn. I invited him to my office and asked him for his reasoning. He said that he wanted to learn about potions because he was interested in pursuing a career in Potions. First I was surprised but because he had not asked for anything unreasonable and that he seemed quite alright under the circumstances after losing his brother, I checked with Horace and he agreed to take on the boy."

Minerva took a sip of her tea before she continued. "His grades are well and I knew that he couldn't study under Severus. Despite you knowing more about potions, you had already agreed to take on Harry and I wanted you to focus on your own healing and on tutoring Harry. Horace spoke to me when the year began to tell me that Dennis was going to help him in class because he showed a rare intelligence in Potions. He kept the stockroom well stocked during classes. That was how he managed to get the ingredients he used in… "Minerva choked before she said.

"Horace was so nervous because Dennis used to talk about Colin a lot and about the Final Battle…He spoke to me about this and I assumed that it was just a simple obsession but it was much more than that I can see now." Minerva looked away, she was nerved by what had happened and Severus fought the rare urge to console her. But before he could move forward Poppy had taken his place, sitting next to the Headmistress and gently speaking to her in a soft tone.

Minerva had always seen so in control. Whatever had happened, if it had been a battle between Death Eaters and the Order or students getting into pranks, it did not matter but she was always the voice of reason. Severus knew that she was no super human or a super witch but to see her so defeated, tired and old was making him feel uncomfortable. He looked away towards the door and concentrated on the bond in his mind as his fingers traced the bracelet around his wrist.

The magic was a dim rustle against his skin because Harry was drugged. It would remain like this until Harry woke up and then there would be wild spurts of magic because Harry would be in pain. Severus closed his eyes when he remembered the previous night. Harry had been suffering and his apprentice had flinched when he had thought that Severus was his uncle. Harry had clung to him, full of trust that Severus wasn't going to harm him. How would Severus deal with such trust? It was misplaced within him.

"Slughorn was naturally very upset about what happened. He kept Dennis well away from Harry, frightful of what would happen if they were in the same room together. He should have come to me and discuss what had happened. He knew his student was in his class and that he bore a grudge to Harry but he didn't come to me, resulting in this…" Minerva's voice was soft and Severus felt his temper rise.

"You mean to tell me that Slughorn _knew _something could happen?" He asked before he could check in his temper.

Minerva looked up at him and finally said, perhaps seeing the look on his face. "He suspected it because Dennis had taken to glaring at Harry and he discovered Dennis' notebook in which several drawings and a list of ingredients that would react with the potions in the seventh year syllabus were lined up. Dennis was planning this in advance."

"And why hasn't he come forward? He could have prevented this!"

"He confronted Dennis with this but you know how Horace is."

"Yes, he is a coward. He didn't want to give up the memory to Professor Dumbledore either when he needed it for the horcruxes hunt. Slughorn had a memory of Tom Riddle asking him what horcruxes were and Slughorn told him. Harry said that he had altered the memory so no blame would fall on him. He must have done the same now." Weasley cried out, startling them all.

Severus felt his rage intensifying as he grit his teeth. He wasn't going to lose control here. He would find Horace later and have some words with him. But it wasn't necessary because the man came walking through the very doors of the Infirmary. Severus felt his grip on his temper snap and his rage took over as he walked towards the man responsible in part of harming his apprentice. Red colored his vision as he grabbed the well sized man by the lapels and hissed. "How dare you show your face here after everything you have done."

"My dear Severus, what on earth are you doing?" Slughorn struggled against him but Severus merely growled in his throat.

"Severus, release him this instance!"

He could feel Minerva's hands on him, trying to pull him away but he held fast, knowing that the slightly weaker witch could not simply pull him away. "Mr. Weasley, Mr. Malfoy some help please!"

He felt Draco's hands on him next but he refused to be pulled away.

"Please sir, let go. Let's just talk about this." Draco's voice was soft but Severus merely narrowed his eyes as he took in Slughorn's pale face.

"Yeah, Professor, there is no good in getting into a scuffle."

Finally the two young men managed to pull him away as Severus backed up even further, panting with the effort of holding himself in check. Granger was staring wide eyed at him but Draco stood at his side, careful not to touch him but to intervene if necessary. Poppy was standing at the bed but Minerva looked disapprovingly between the two of them. Slughorn stood next to Weasley, holding a handkerchief to his mouth as he stared at Severus, his big body shielded from the other Potions Master.

Ronald let out a huge breath before he said, pulling up his sleeves. "Right, now that that is sorted."

The next moment Ronald swung around and his fist connected soundly with Slughorn's nose. Severus gasped alongside the rest of the room as Granger exclaimed. "Ronald!"

Slughorn toppled backwards, holding a hand to his nose as Weasley stood over him, panting as he said. "That is for being a coward! You should have learned your lesson with Tom Riddle! I hold you responsible along with Dennis Creevey that Harry is now in that room. You have got some nerve to show your face here after everything that happened!"

Finally Severus found his voice as he bellowed. "Mr. Weasley that will be enough out of you. Come here this instance!"

Minerva seemed pleased that he took things in hand as she went to help Slughorn up. Weasley flashed him a grin as he came to stand in front of Severus.

"Why have you done what you have done?" Severus demanded harshly once the red haired young man was standing in front of him. _And why haven't you allowed me the satisfaction of doing it as well?_

Weasley looked chastened as he shuffled his feet and said. "I'm sorry, sir but I couldn't allow you to tarnish your reputation further when I can't do anything wrong in the eyes of the public. They will simply see that I'm defending my best friend while they'll see it as you that you are defending your lover."

"You do realize that as a teacher at this facility I cannot condone this kind of behavior, right, Mr. Weasley?"

"Of course, Professor."

"Very well, that will be five points from Gryffindor for attacking a teacher. You will however be granted ten points for coming to the aid and protection of one of your friends as Mr. Potter's tutor I have awarded these points to Gryffindor." Weasley grinned and Severus merely nodded once.

He glanced beyond Weasley to see Slughorn had sat up and was holding his nose as Poppy bustled about him. She could have fixed his nose with the tap of her wand but she wasn't, perhaps extending her own punishment and judgment upon Horace. Minerva was looking at him with narrowed eyes, wand in hand in case he tried again.

He took a step closer and then hissed, as coldly as he could manage. "I do not care what excuse you will make up but it was your responsibility as a tutor to look out for your student and to watch for these things. You have failed! You are responsible for a student that harmed another student, something he will be at the very least expelled for if not going to Azkaban. There will be a trial, in which your name will be mentioned! I will see to it myself that the Guild knows of your involvement in not keeping your class in affairs! Accidents can always happen but this wasn't an accident. This was a thought out attack, something you should have prevented because that is your responsibility as a Potions Master! You are responsible for your students and once again you have failed! You are not fit to teach! You aren't fit to even brew potions because you didn't handle as you should have handled! I hold you responsible for getting Mr. Potter hurt. You should have controlled all your students, especially your own! I don't care what comes out of these investigations or how you will console yourself but if I ever see you near my apprentice without supervision, I will take action!"

Severus didn't care that the man before him was trembling or the whole room had gone silent before he looked Slughorn in the eye as he spoke the final words. "I don't care what you may have taught me or how you may have nurtured me, you were always weak to those that had talents and it backfired on you! You should have seen the signs of madness as you should have seen them in Tom Riddle a long time ago but you didn't! You were blinded by raw talent and skills and for that, I despise you! You will never be my master again! My promise stands! Everything between us is over and gone! I will give you respect that you deserve as a Potions Master but my respect for you as a man is gone! Mark my words, Horace Slughorn, if you as much breathe at Harry Potter, I'll make you pay."

And with those words Severus stormed out. He needed time away and he needed to think and he knew he couldn't do that at Harry's side. Besides his apprentice was still asleep and the room was warded, who could possibly sneak in?

HP

Harry wasn't entirely sure what woke him up from a wonderful dream he had been having. He had been sleeping so soundly and he had felt so safe but now he felt cold. He shifted in the bed, recalling that somebody had slept beside him, pressed against him. He looked around, blinded still but not sure who or what was here.

"Oh Harry, who has done this to you?" Disoriented by the voice he didn't recognize Harry's head snapped to the left. He breathed in deeply, tasting the odorless and scentless air around him. His throat and chest didn't hurt so badly as they had done the first time he had woken up and the rest also felt wonderfully numb.

Hands touched his tender cheeks, sending flashes of pain as Harry recoiled. He was roughly seized around the shoulders and propped up but he didn't have the breath to protest. It wasn't the firm chest he had been sleeping against. No this chest was soft and long hair tickled his cheeks, nose and the bandages around his eyes as the same voice whispered. "Oh, your eyes. What has happened to your eyes? I shouldn't have been so mean to you, Harry. I'm so sorry. Why did nobody warn me? I should have been sitting at your bedside. You shouldn't have been left to suffer all on your own."

The magic that came from the person wasn't Snape's magic so it couldn't have been his master, but then who was it? His head ached when he thought so Harry merely decided to relax.

He breathed in deeply but instead of the odorless and scentless air a heavy perfume hung in the air. His nose and throat burned with the rich perfume and it sent Harry into a coughing fit as he desperately tried to draw in fresh air into his healing airway and lungs. The person that held him moved and pushed him back on the bed as that person took his hand and squeezed roughly, making Harry cry out as he fell into another coughing fit.

His hand was held steadily and Harry tried to tug it away because the grip was hurting him but the hand held fast. A hand held him around the shoulder shaking him as he coughed.

"Harry, what is happening? Breath you fool!"

Harry tried, he really did but the coughing barely subsided enough for him to draw a mouthful of air and it still was filled with that perfume. He went into another coughing fit, pain flaring in his throat and lungs. It reminded Harry of his potions class and he flailed on the bed, trying to get away from the perfume that seemed to have invaded the whole room but the person that held him continued to do so, refusing to let him get away.

"_Stupefy!" _

It was a harsh whisper and then there was a sudden pressure of weight upon Harry that seemed even more determent to drive the air from Harry's lungs. Suddenly it was removed and Harry heard a thud. He didn't focus on it because he was still choking. He tried in vain to shuffle away to find a patch of clean air but there wasn't any. The whole room reeked of the heavy perfume and then a hand circled his shoulder. Harry flinched sharply with the contact but then suddenly magic surrounded him.

This magic was familiar, so achingly familiar that Harry turned towards it instinctively. This magic was safety and the person would protect him. He coughed, still choking upon the perfume that seemed to have invaded his nose and throat and was even in his very lungs.

"Come on, Harry, even breaths, just like I taught you, you remember." Harry tried to remember and he tried to do it but it wouldn't work. That damn scent was everywhere and he choked again, panting with the effort to get clean air in his lungs.

The world was pressing in on him, becoming smaller as his heart pounded in his ears.

Arms surrounded him and pulled him away from the bed. Harry didn't care that these arms were gentle as he lay like a rag doll whose strings had been cut. He was placed in a warm lap, against a firm chest and held securely. Fingers traced his lips as Harry pushed them together to make sure none of his breath could escape.

"I have purified the air around my lips but you will need my help. Please do not fight me, Harry."

_Why should I fight him?_

Lips pressed against his own and Harry froze. Harry opened his mouth as a warm tongue licked at the seam of his lips but instead of a tongue sliding in, warm _clean _purified air flowed into his hurting throat, easing the strength of the perfume immediately as Harry breathed in time with his master. Snape's magic surged around him, wrapping them in a protective cocoon and Harry finally relaxed as the itching in his throat died. It seemed to take a lifetime but finally the perfume was being cleaned away and Harry inhaled in time with Snape and exhaled with him.

The hot puff of breath on his cheek indicated that Snape was still breathing for him and the itching died away completely.

He fastened his fist in the thick fabric of Snape's jumper, his still tender hand brushing the course fabric. The long hair tingled his healing cheeks and the bandages around his eyes but it didn't matter to Harry, just as long as he could lay here and feel the familiar and comfortable magic against his skin. He didn't know how long it continued but his lungs no longer hurt and his airway was tingling.

He slowly raised his hand, feeling the damp hair against it before he brushed it away so he could feel the stubble of fine hair underneath his hand as he placed it against a warm cheek. His fingers traced the rough, unshaven skin as he tried to imagine Snape's face above him. The dark eyes, open or closed as they peered into his own. The thin lips that were pressed against his own. The harsh lines that stood out even more.

A hand crawled over the back of his head before a hand came to rest over his hand against Snape's cheek, pressing it there and holding it, curling long fingers around Harry's palm and lightly tracing the bandages. Harry's fingers brushed Snape's nose and an eyelid that quivered underneath his touch. Slowly he explored further, feeling the soft eyebrows underneath his fingers and the lines in the face of the wizard before him.

What had put these lines there? What had Snape seen that had aged him so prematurely? What had the older wizard done that he was so bitter? What had Snape lost that he knew that life wasn't fair and it was better not to love than to lose? Had Snape lost somebody he loved? Of course he had, he had lost Harry's mother.

Snape deserved somebody who loved him. He deserved friends to get to know him and to be there for him. Snape was somebody who was protecting and caring even when he didn't show it. Despite the harsh outside that nobody could penetrate there was a warm human heart beating inside of Snape.

Finally Snape pulled away and Harry carefully pulled in a shallow breath. When the air didn't hurt his lungs or smelled even remotely of perfume he breathed in deeper. He just realized how exhausted he was as he laid his head against Snape's shoulder. Snape pulled his hand away carefully, tucking it against his body but Harry removed his hand and splayed his hand over Snape's chest, over the steady beating heart so he could hear it, feel it thump against his palm.

"I shall settle you back into bed. The air has been purified and you are safe. I'll remove Miss Weasley myself…"

"No…please…don't…leave me…" Stubbornly Harry tried to make himself heavier so he couldn't be moved. He didn't want to move. He wanted to stay here, safe and sound.

The arms tightened around him and Snape settled with a huff of: "Stubborn brat."

Content Harry allowed himself to relax in the arms of his master as he drifted off into sleep, happy to contemplate the mystery that was his master.

Hp

Severus stared down at the sleeping Potter. Carefully he shifted the young man's weight in his arms, settling him so he lay with his head against Severus' shoulder and his feet on the other end. He sighed, his breath ruffling the messy hair. He closed his eyes, hands holding Harry steady. Merlin, that had been too close for his liking. They had painfully purified the air and set up charms that would purify the air that came in every few minutes so any change of Harry getting worse or having an infection were minimalised and now this happened.

If he had been a few minutes late then Harry could have died or he could have gotten worse, even now they would have to wait to see what the damage was to his lungs because of the perfume. Harry's lungs and airway were very sensitive and they would react to the smallest change in the air that he breathed.

His eyes shot to the prone figure of Ginny Weasley lying in a heap in the corner. One flick of his wand and the chit was barreled out of the door to land in the Infirmary, What had she been thinking? Damn the chit for harming his apprentice.

Harry had been doing so well, he had been relaxed and asleep, just healing in this room and she had messed it all up. She had slipped into the room, he had assumed that nobody would come in except for him and Poppy but she had managed it somehow and what was even worse, she had worn a perfume.

Severus couldn't even afford to use any scented soap when he had showered because the scent would irritate Harry's healing airways. He looked down again and stroked the dark hair away from the sweaty forehead as he said.

"Please heal, Harry. I could not live with myself if you were to die as well. You have beat death, brat, you can beat this! Just keep fighting and do not give up! I know that I'm the last person who should be lecturing you about this but no apprentice of mine will ever give up. Just imagine what it will do to my reputation. You care so much about keeping me out of Azkaban but if you die that is where I'm going to end up. You defended me during the Final Battle, Mr. Potter and you came back to come and collect me. Do not think that I'm going to give up on you now. You never gave up on me. So you better fight this with everything you have got in you because I refuse to let you go!"

_Who am I to lecture Harry on living when I haven't even been __doing that? I have snarled at life, fought it at every turn but I have never been living. I have hid myself away, allowing myself to drift in the past because it was much easier than to confront the future. I thought that I needed to do penance but that is done now and the battle has been fought and won. Don't I deserve to live now as well? But what if I can't, what if I can't let go of the past and I cannot live? Can I really change my ways as I should have done? Harry has lost so much and yet he still lives and tries to live his life to the fullest. It is time to stop surviving and to start living…_

_Can I do this with Harry? Can I guide, teach and nurture him to prepare him for the future? I have taken the oath but is it within my ability? Perhaps Minerva is __right; perhaps I have need of Harry as he has need of me. I think it is time to stop living with the regrets I have and to start to focus on the future. If I want to end this apprenticeship right then I need to step up my game. Harry has need of me and I will be there for him. It doesn't matter in what form, whether as a master or as a friend, I will be there for him. And I think…yes…I think that perhaps if I give Harry the chance he can be a friend to me as well._

It wasn't easy to admit this, not in the slightest but as Severus took a deep breath he could feel the burden lift from his shoulders and his heart. He looked down at Harry's unconscious form. The green eyes were hidden by bandages and the flushed cheeks were starting to shed their skin but it didn't matter to Severus. At that moment, Harry was somebody who needed him and Severus was going to be there for him, helping him to heal. And he silently promised his apprentice as much and this was a promise he would never break.

Hp

Severus wasn't sure how long he was sitting there, looking down at his apprentice as he continued to hold Harry. Harry went back to sleeping peacefully, once in a while twitching. Severus knew that this was just the start. Once Harry was strong enough to be kept awake, the real recovery would start. Harry would need to recover strengthen his lungs, airway and vocal cords again. This was just the beginning.

Severus pushed Harry's fringe away from his forehead, stroking the fading scar. So much had happened in such a short life and now this. Harry had already had so much to deal with mentally and it certainly wasn't helping that his body was injured as well.

Severus glanced up when Poppy crossed the threshold. She had her wand in the hand as she asked, her voice hurried. "What is Miss Weasley doing in front of Harry's door? And why is Harry out of his bed?"

Severus' eyes narrowed in a glare as he hissed. "I found her in here, reeking of perfume. She nearly undid all the hard work that we have done to clean this room and to keep Mr. Potter free from any bacteria. Mr. Potter reacted to this change in nature of course but if I hadn't arrived in time then he would have choked to death. I had to apply mouth to mouth."

Poppy raised an eyebrow before she asked, raising her wand as she directed Miss Weasley to a bed and used a quick spell to tie her up. "And where does that tie in with me finding you with Harry on your lap and not in his bed as he should be?"

She crossed the room and cast a diagnostic charm, verifying that Harry was well, under the circumstances. Severus could feel his cheeks heat up as he glanced down at his apprentice and murmured. "He refuses to release me. I have tried to get him back to bed but he does not wish to let go and he is sleeping so peacefully."

"You do realize that I may have to key the wards differently if I keep finding you in compromising positions with our wounded hero. I may not have made myself clear enough, Harry needs rest! Sleeping beside him is one thing but to apply _mouth to mouth _to him, Severus, really Harry is in no shape to be doing these things…"

Severus could feel his earlier rage returning, the rage he had thought he had washed away when he had gone to take his shower returned full force. He would have risen to his feet and stalked over if it hadn't been for Harry. He did glare at her as he hissed. "How dare you accuse me of such things, Poppy? I was here for Harry when you should have keyed the wards so that only you or I was to enter this room. Had we come in later to check up on Harry he might have died or he would have gotten ill?"

"Easy, Severus, I was merely joking. I know that you would not try anything unless with carefully written consent. You just never struck me as the type of person who could be too tactile…"

"Do not try to remedy the situation by using humor, woman! And besides, I'm merely being _tactile _with Potter because every time I try to move the brat has got some sort of grip on me. It isn't my fault that I think of Potter's fragile nature at the moment rather than to upset him by moving him. He just won't bloody release me! But do not change the subject, Poppy, how could Ginevra Weasley enter here? If she could enter this room then perhaps Dennis Creevey could have come back to finish what he started."

Severus' eyes were hard and unforgiving, despite the tell tale signs of pink in his cheeks. Severus was the only man who could still look intimidating while cradling his apprentice closer. She could tell that he was embarrassed but she allowed him to change the subject as she said. "I may not have rewarded the room as I did during the night. Normally I ward the rooms very tightly so that I will be woken when one of my patients is in distress but I have not done so during the day. It was because we were in the Infirmary and nobody could have slipped past us but when you walked out, Minerva asked if I could attend to Horace which I did. It seems that Miss Weasley managed to sneak past me…"

Severus could feel his fury ebbing away. He wasn't going to tell Poppy how to do her job. Under the circumstances and the stress she must have been under she did a fantastic job and he respected her for it. Everybody made mistakes and they were lucky that he had gotten here on time. He was as much to blame as she was. This morning's events had knocked them all off kilter and he had left Harry just as unprotected as she had.

"How is he doing?" He asked instead, looking down at Harry.

"Under the circumstances he is doing alright. But I need to change the dressing around his eyes and hands. I want to take a look at his eyes and see if I can assess the damage. I have tried to get all the shards out but I fear that there may be some residual scarring."

"Very well, then let us do that." Severus rose and he lifted Harry, carrying him back to the bed. He tried to settle the Gryffindor back on the blankets without waking him but Harry keened low in his throat when Severus sought to remove his arms. Severus rolled his eyes and he scooped Harry back up into his arms, sinking back down in the chair Poppy Summoned forward. He leaned forward as he whispered. "Be careful, Mr. Potter, wounded or not, you'll not be responsible for pulling my reputation to tatters."

Yet despite his best to try and keep a professional distance he found that he could not when Harry mewled softly as Poppy cut the bandages around his eyes with a quick spell. She carefully pulled the bandages away, wincing when they stuck around Harry's eyes. Severus didn't even dare to look when Poppy pried them away as she said gently. "It is because of the burning salve I have applied. It can cause the bandages to stick."

Severus glanced down to the blistered skin around Harry's eyes. Yet when the bandage had come off there was still gauge covering Harry's eyes, protecting the soft tissue. She removed those as well. Severus' breath caught in his throat. The skin around Harry's eyes was reddish, though not nearly as bad as the rest of his face but it was enough to make Severus feel uncomfortable.

Small lacerations cut up the skin though Harry's eyes seemed fine at the first glance. Poppy leaned closer and cast another spell, one more complex this time. Severus could feel the magic brush his skin before moving towards Harry's eyes, hovering over it before sinking into the skin. He wasn't prepared for the reaction that the color of the blue spark that appeared had on Poppy and Harry. Harry tensed suddenly and his eyelids moved underneath his closed eyelids but it was Poppy that worried Severus more. She exclaimed and backed away at once before coming to her senses and moving her wand in a complex pattern.

"What is the matter?" He demanded his heart dropping at the hurried movements of her wand.

She didn't answer straight away and then the next moment she said, sounding odd so Severus glanced up. His eyes widen when he saw that there were tears in her eyes before she looked him in the eye and said. "I thought that I had safely removed all the shards and splinters of glass from his eyes. I had hoped that there would be no lasting damage but there was no way to know for sure because sometimes it takes time before these things show up. There is more damage than I anticipated…"

"What kind of damage, Poppy?" Severus practically growled.

He was anxiously awaiting her answer before she looked at him, her eyes swimming with tears. "It seems that Harry has some scarring on his cornea. It is quite large and it extends over both eyes in different places…'

"And what does this mean?" Severus glanced down at the hidden green eyes.

"It means that Harry can possibly become fully or partly blind." And as Severus closed his own eyes, he wondered how his apprentice was going to take this latest blow? But Severus would be there for him in every way.

**Another cliffy. Alright, I did not manage the get the ****confrontation with Dennis in there. It will be in the next chapter since it was getting quite long. So there will be two parts. So what should happen with Harry? Let me know of course and send some ideas for the confrontation with Dennis please. **

**In the next chapter: Severus has seen many things in his time but what will happen when Harry opens his eyes for the first time? Will our suffering hero have his vision or will it be compromised? And will Severus be able to keep his promise of staying at Harry's side when Harry's inner demons rise to the surface because he thinks he isn't worth any fussing over? How will Ginny Weasley be dealt with? And what will happen with Dennis Creevey? Will he still be in one piece when Severus gets through with him for the aurors to collect or can he be admitted straight into St. Mungo's? That and more in: Reasoning part II **


	16. reasoning II

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. Alright, the long wait is over. I finally found the time to write. So I hope that not everybody scampered off to find a story that is updated more regularly but anyway, let's begin.**

Waking up was agony, it wasn't because his very breath hurt, he was used to that but this time the pain was deeper. The last time he had awakened, the pain had been a whispered promise to him but now, now it wasn't.

It was full blown agony and so Harry did the only thing he could think of, he opened his mouth and screamed. It wasn't a good scream as far as screams went. It was nearly silent but the pain was so unexpected. Like he had been doused with a bucket full of cold water and woken up abruptly.

One moment he had been floating peacefully and now he was woken up and plagued by that terrible ache. It was frightening. Only now could he feel how much it hurt to draw in one shallow breath. How it hurt each time he swallowed. How much his hands, face and body were stinging. The deep ache in his chest seemed to reach into his very lungs and Harry tried not to choke.

He could remember a wonderful, deep, soothing voice speaking to him as long elegant hands ran through his hair. He had been surrounded by magic, the very same magic that had been in the bracelet but now it was gone.

He tried to open his eyes but he couldn't see anything. Hands were holding him but the very touch hurt his skin and he cried out again.

"Damn it, Poppy, I said it would be too soon to allow him to fully come out of it. We should have done it in steps."

The pain was oddly reminiscent of the time he had spent in his cupboard when he was three. When he had managed to drop a hot pan of soup all over himself. The pain had been similar to that.

In his confused mind, he pulled away from the hands that were trying to help him. Hands that were holding him gently but it still hurt. He flinched away, trying unsuccessfully to hide himself. The very intention of moving hurt but suddenly magic flared over his skin.

Harry recoiled and then fell silent. He knew that magic. Snape's magic. The magic came from the bracelet but it was a whisper of the more powerful wizard. Snape was agitated about something. He briefly wondered what it was.

"I cannot safely drug him now, Severus. He is too agitated for it. The pain medication should have been adequate but it does not seem to be. We need to get him settled before he undoes all the healing he has managed to do in the past day."

"I will try but I cannot promise that it will have any effect. The last time he was drugged rather severely." Hands held him, gentling their movement. But Harry struggled again, he tried to get away. It wouldn't be the first time that Uncle Vernon or Aunt Petunia had tried that approach with him.

Hands gripped him firmly and unbidden memories rose of a time when a gentle voice had spoken to Harry, nursing him through a coughing fit. The steady breathing and heartbeat of somebody near to him, somebody who protected him. He remembered being wrapped in arms that held him securely.

But most of all he remembered the feeling of Snape's magic. It was the same magic that seemed almost absent now and Harry felt the loss keenly. But when he focused on his surroundings for a moment, he found that it wasn't gone. It was waiting at the edge of his senses, waiting to be acknowledged.

Confused, Harry held still. Perhaps he wasn't in his cupboard at all. The pain was still throbbing but it no longer overwhelmed him as Harry acknowledged his need for safety. He knew he needed help but as long as he didn't know who was in the room with him, how could he relax?

A hand touched his shoulder. A hand that lay there lightly and which could be snatched away when Harry even so much as flinched. Harry turned towards that hand, feeling the familiar magic coming from it. He reached out blindly so he could grasp the shirt and his hand balled in the coarse fabric, heedless of the pain that spread across his palm.

"Harry?" A voice murmured.

Another hand touched his other shoulder and Harry sagged against the strong hands. He allowed them to hold and to cradle him. Snape shifted him. Harry was suddenly aware that he was resting against a firm chest as the hands continued to rest on his shoulder.

The next moment another pair of gentle hands tipped his head back. Harry could feel himself sliding away, he was as weak as a ragdoll but arms that slid around his chest prevented him from falling. One hand sprawled over his stomach and the other over his chest.

"Shhh, it is Severus. I know that you feel horrible at the moment, Harry but we had to wake you. Do not try to panic but give yourself a moment to adjust…."

"But it hurts so much…"

"I know, brat, I know. But you have lived through far worse. You have been possessed by the Dark Lord, hell, you _defeated _him. You can beat this pain." The deep voice was soothing but it held a dark edge to it.

It was almost like Snape could imagine what Harry was going through. As if he could understand the pain Harry was in. But Snape could of course. What had Harry been thinking? Of course Snape could. The older wizard had lived through a similar experience.

Harry didn't even know what to answer but the hands held him steadily as Snape softly whispered. "It is alright to scream, Harry. I did the same thing when I woke up. There is no need to keep the pain bottled up inside. It won't do you any good and we need to know when you are hurting."

"Severus, you really surprise me. I never knew you to be quite so tactile."

"It got the job done, didn't it?" Harry could almost hear the sneer in Snape's voice.

"Yes, Severus, you are right about that. Harry seems more relaxed whenever you are around. I think that it may have something to do with you being his master. The bracelet you gave him and then you being near him mean safety for him."

"I am not the best man to mention when it comes to safety and Potter." Snape's voice was curt.

"Harry seems to think so. I think it is because of the magic that the bracelet releases. And Harry recognizes your magic and connects it to a safe environment. You have done very well in creating that for him."

"And yet you do not approve of my _tactile _approach?" The chest against his back was stiff but Harry was too tired to move. He allowed his head to fall back against Snape's shoulder.

"If it works on Harry and since I am aware of the close bond between master and apprentice, I will not judge. You keep forgetting, Severus, that I have seen you at your worst. It would please me tremendously, my dear, to see you at your best."

Harry could feel Snape's arm muscles tighten around his waist and involuntarily he hissed softly. The pain had diminished but now that Harry refocused he could feel it throbbing in his body. Snape's voice was downright cold as he said.

"Perhaps you have already seen me at my best, Poppy!"

"Now you are practicing wishful thinking, Severus, and that is unlike you at all. You will be surprised by how much things can improve for you." Madam Pomfrey's voice held an equal edge to it and Harry shifted. He was uncomfortable enough without hearing this conversation.

A hand caressed his hair and Madam Pomfrey said. "Let's see how your eyes are, Harry, dear."

Harry tried to focus upon Madam Pomfrey's voice but it wavered and slowly it slid out of focus as he lost the battle with his exhaustion.

Hp

Severus cursed softly when Harry's head dropped back against his shoulder. The younger wizard had been struggling to stay awake ever since they brought him out from under the potion's influence. It was a known side affect of Dreamless Sleep that the potion would render anybody who was under the influence for long with exhaustion for days to come.

Harry had been strongly drugged so it was not surprising that his body was worn out, especially with the healing Harry had to do. Severus once more ran his hand through Harry's hair.

Harry's unfocussed green eyes had opened but Harry had been too distracted to properly focus on them.

_Or perhaps he can't. _A traitorous voice whispered in Severus' mind. He snarled at it to be quite. He wasn't going down that road unless they knew for certain that Harry was blind. He moved one hand so he could hold Harry's head steady as he nodded at Poppy.

She looked shaken but nodded at him as she raised her wand. Severus immediately whispered. _"Renovate."_

Harry awoke with a gasp of pain and he struggled against Severus' hold. Severus held him securely against his chest before he snarled. "Stop this insane struggling. Potter. We're trying to help you."

He needed to create some distance between himself and his apprentice for his own sanity. If that was possible when Harry was lying in between his spread legs, snuggled up against his chest.

Harry went rigid in his arms; shallow breathing escaping him and Severus regretted having to be so harsh. But they needed Harry to focus and if this was the way to do so, then so be it.

He pushed away the desire to gentle his words with a soothing hand through Harry's hair. He let his hands still, one over Harry's brow and the other over Harry's stomach, holding the brat steady.

"Well, hurry up! I do not want to be forced to hold him in this position for very long!" He growled. Harry shivered in his arms, probably from the shock but the younger wizard couldn't suppress a faint flinch at the fierceness of Severus' tone.

"Harry, dear, can you open your eyes for me?" Poppy lid her wand with a silent _Lumos. _Severus looked away from the strong light before he glanced once more at Potter.

In the harsh light the redness of Harry's skin stood out but Severus was glad that he could see that the skin on Harry's cheeks was beginning to blister and thus heal. Yet the laceration around Harry's eyes seemed even worse. They had scabbed over and Severus knew that Poppy was qualified to heal them but why she hadn't done so was beyond him.

But he knew better than to rouse her from her concentration. She was holding Harry's chin steady as the younger wizard obeyed sluggishly.

"That is a good boy. Now I need you to focus upon me. I know that it is hard and it hurts but I need you to answer some questions, is that understood?"

Harry wearily bobbed his head up and down. Severus could feel the weak magic brush against his skin as Harry fought not to cry out. Harry was breathing fast and Severus could almost feel the pain that was threatening to overwhelm his apprentice.

He firmly tried to ignore the buzzing bond in his head. It was responding to Harry's pain and Harry's need to him.

The green eyes fixed on the light but Severus could tell that they were not focusing as they should.

"What do you see, Harry?" Poppy leaned in to peer into Harry's eyes.

"Not much…it is all kind of blurry…" Harry's voice was barely a croak and Severus wondered just how much damage there had been done to Harry's vocal cords. They would need to be a lot more assessing before Harry even had a chance to be dismissed from the Hospital Wing.

"Just how bad is his eyesight? It would not do to create extra stress for Harry when we are worried about him not being able to see well, when he could never see well to begin with."

"I know how bad Harry's eyesight is, Severus. Now if you would be so kind to loan me your wand, I can take some readings with my own while your wand can perform the Lumos. I cannot verify the damage like this."

Severus raised his eyebrows but he did as requested. He told himself brusquely that it wasn't something to worry about as he handed Poppy his wand. It made him uneasy, as any self respecting witch or wizard would, to give their wand to somebody else. Poppy waited while Severus said the spell.

His wand might work for her but there was a good chance that it might not. She respected him enough to not wave it like a dunderhead around and then wonder why nothing happened. His wand had been fine tuned to his every need.

His first wand had been brought with the money that his mother had set aside for him when he was going to attend Hogwarts. This wand he had bought with his own money when he had achieved his Mastery. He needed a different wand, a wand that was tuned finer than the one he had wielded when he was a student.

A Potions Master would need his wand for different things, especially for complex potions and while it cost him a small fortune, it was one of the best things he had ever bought for himself. This was a wand that had been especially made for him by a master. A master who specialized in making wands for Potions Masters and who had come highly recommended by the Guild.

But right now, it mattered not because Severus waited with bated breath as Poppy waved her own wand in a complex pattern as she held up Severus' wand and used it to make Harry focus.

"Alright now, Harry, I need you to focus on this light. I will move it and you need to tell me what you can see, do you understand that?"

Severus felt Harry's weak nod of the head against his shoulder. He applied a little pressure and Harry whimpered.

"Just relax, it will ease soon." He whispered.

Harry's eyes were frightful, wide in distress but he did focus on the light.

"Do you see the light?" Poppy held it right in front of him and softly Harry answered.

"Yeah…but it…isn't very bright…blurred and there grey specks in front of it…like I'm watching through a …greasy glass and cracked glass….." Harry couched and Severus could feel the tremors running through his apprentice's body.

Severus longed to run his hands through Harry's hair to calm him but he could feel how tense Harry was. Right now was not the time to coddle his apprentice.

"And when I turn this way?"

It continued in such a manner as Poppy turned Severus' wand this way and that way and forced Harry to follow the light with his eyes. Each time Harry gave the same answer, he could see the light but as Harry described it, sometimes it was almost as if there were grey patched in his vision. Something that was there and he couldn't see around it but when he turned his head, the grey patch was in the same spot.

"Alright, my dear. You have done very well. Let me just see how your throat is doing."

"Tired…" Harry murmured. Severus didn't even need to hold the younger male steady anymore.

Harry's head dropped against his shoulder and this time, Severus relaxed his grip slightly. He allowed Harry to find a more natural and comfortable position. Poppy was watching him with a smile as Harry ended up curled up against Severus' side. Severus shifted until he was as comfortable as Harry was.

The younger male blinked up at him sleepily. There was tenseness in Harry's muscles that had nothing to do with the pain the younger male was in. Harry wasn't as comfortable in his presence as he had been earlier.

Harry was too weak to struggle but Severus knew without a doubt that Harry would have if he was able.

"Then you go to sleep, Harry. You deserve it. I need to speak to Professor Snape in private anyway. You will soon have your master back at your side."

"S'not necessary. Don't want to be a burden….S'okay…" Severus frowned. He glanced up at Poppy in confusion before he shifted away from the bed. He turned back to tug the blanket up around Harry and said.

"Try and get some sleep, I will not be far away and I shall be right back…"

"No…don't want you here…." Severus had to do a double take but the rage that shot through him made him realize he had not misheard.

"What did you say?" He asked in an icy whisper.

Harry glanced up, eyes weary and full of pain as he whispered again, coughs escaping him. "You don't want to be here….you don't…want to hold me…don't want to be forced to hold me….so not necessary for you to be here…."

Severus' eyes lifted up to meet those of Poppy standing near the door. She could see the confusion in the dark eyes before she beckoned to him and whispered as he stepped away from the bed. "Harry mistook your meaning when you said that you didn't want to be forced to hold him upright for so long. He thought it meant that you didn't want to hold him."

Comprehension dawned on Severus and he sighed before he signaled for her to leave. It was up to him to correct this. He moved back to Harry's side, the green eyes watching him with apprehension.

"I was looking out for your welfare, Harry…"

"Is what uncle Vernon also said….Didn't mean he did the right thing….but is okay, sir…don't have to be here. Don't want you here….!" Don't need you….."

Rage was making it hard for him to breathe as Severus straightened up with a snap and hissed. "Then suit yourself, Mr. Potter. I suggest that you find somebody else willing to cater to your every need then!"

And as he walked out of the room, he was unaware of the pain filled green eyes that followed but only of how much his heart was hammering and just how much this actually hurt to be rejected by his own apprentice.

Hp

"Now calm, Severus. Why don't you have a cup of tea and try to settle yourself down?"

_Who is she trying to tell to be calm? I have no reason to be calm. I spent the past two days at the brat's bedside__ only to get dismissed when he is lucid enough to speak plainly. I should have known it before. Potter was merely making use of an opportunity to have somebody there to cater his every whim. I don't even know why I even bothered. He is as spoiled as his father. _

Severus knew it wasn't entirely true what he was thinking but at the moment all he had to chew on was his rage. He glowered in the general direction of Potter's room. The brat didn't deserve to be his apprentice.

_If everybody I ever snapped at when I was hurting at __had to stay mad at me, I wouldn't have any friends left. Not that I have much to begin with but sometimes when under the influence of a certain potion or pain, I have called Poppy some pretty bad names. _

Severus growled at himself to shut up. He was not having this conversation with himself. He startled when Poppy placed a cup of tea in front of him.

As he inclined his head in a way of thanks, he took a sip. The refreshing taste ran over his tongue and Severus closed his eyes. It was almost like heaven to taste the tea after the horrendous morning.

First the run in with Slughorn, then finding Potter practically choking because of Ginny Weasley, well it had been a trying morning. On another note, he still needed to deal with her. But so far she hadn't woken up so Severus decided to propone that until he could think clearly or Minerva was here so he could consult with her, whichever came first.

"Severus, I know that you are tired and most likely itching for a break but there are some things that we have to discuss regarding Harry."

He gestured with his hand for her to start and Poppy took a sip of her own tea. She looked drawn and weary and Severus settled back in his chair. He allowed her a long moment to pull herself together. She looked like she needed it and consider everything that had happened in the past day, he couldn't blame her.

His own feelings regarding Potter at the moment put aside, the younger male still had a way to go before he could be released from the Infirmary. But at the moment Severus wasn't so sure how big a role he was going to play in that part.

He had no intention of abandoning his apprentice but currently, he didn't really feel like spending much time then absolutely necessary with Potter.

"I found some unsettling things when I compared the test results with the earlier results I had from earlier readings from Harry's eyes." Severus was afraid to meet her eyes but he forced himself to do so anyway.

He was distracted as the bond buzzed in his mind but by now that was such a normal occurrence whenever he was away from Potter's beside that he dismissed it. He shook his head irritably, annoying brat, demanding attention all the time.

"You were saying, Poppy."

She took a deep breath and then looked him in the eye as she said. "There is residual scarring, Severus. Harry's vision is badly compromised. You can compare it to looking through a glass and then suddenly having something smash into that glass. The glass isn't broken but there are cracks running over the glass making it harder to see clearly. Combined with Harry's already bad eyesight and you can imagine what this will mean."

"Is it permanent?" It was like Severus had feared.

"I cannot determine that yet. Time will tell. But I am not going to cover up his eyes for the moment. There is fluid in there that needs to come out and the quickest way to do that is for tears to form. Irritation will most likely set in soon. I have no idea how I am going to break this news to Harry."

"Perhaps we should cross that hurdle in a few days. Potter isn't lucid enough at the moment…" _Though he is lucid enough to dismiss me like a sack of dragon dung. _

"I need to work out a dose for his medications. His throat and lungs are not healed enough for him to be conscious for any length of time. But he does need a break from the Dreamless Sleep. I shall consult with St. Mungo's; perhaps they can suggest an alternative potion Harry can take. Unless you know something."

Severus shook his head and ignored her hopeful glance.

"Then you shall be returning to watch over him while I make the call?"

"Potter made it exceptionally clear how he thought about me sitting at his bedside. I am not going to go back like a beaten pup with my tail in between his legs…." Severus began.

"Severus Snape! How can you be such a cruel man? Harry is hurt and confused. He mistook your meaning like he is prone to do when he isn't under the influence of a very strong potion so you cannot honestly blame him. He has need of you even when he may have hurt you! If you explained it to him he will see reason…"

"I already tried and he didn't listen. As he always does!"

"Can you be held accountable for your actions when you were hurt and in pain?" Poppy snapped right back and Severus snarled.

"Of course not!"

"Then how can you hold Harry accountable for his? I know he wounded your pride, young man, after everything you have done for him but you cannot deny him your care now. This is the time your apprentice needs you the most, Severus. Harry may not willingly admit it but he needs somebody to hold him and tell him it will be alright. It has been denied to him for most of his life and he doesn't know how to deal with it. Would you rather I sat with him? Somebody who doesn't know him and who doesn't have the same bond with him that you do?"

Chagrined, Severus looked away. She had a point but he wasn't going to admit it happily.

"Go and sit with him, Severus. Talk to him, sooth him but don't allow him to push you away. We didn't either when you sought to strike as us when you were wounded."

With a sigh he rose. He looked back at her and asked. "Was I really that insufferable when I was here?"

Poppy smiled at him and said. "If Minerva hadn't been the strong person she was or knew you so very well, then I think that you would have reduced her to tears on many occasions, Severus."

And as Severus flushed with guilt, he left the office, going to his apprentice but not happy about it.

Hp

Severus slowed his steps outside Harry's room. He listened at the door; sure that he had heard something. A low moan reached his ears, and then a sniff. Confused to what could be causing this sound, Severus stepped into the room.

Harry was on the bed, twisted in the sheets and sweat and tears making the younger man's face a mess. The already red cheeks were flushed and the green eyes were alight with an intense unhealthy glow. Harry wheezed for breath, seeming to have worked himself up into a state.

Severus sighed and stepped forward to untangle Potter from the blankets. He pulled roughly as he hissed. "I told you not to work yourself up but as usual you don't listen."

Harry flinched away, not only from the tone of voice but also from the rough hands and whimpered. "I'm sorry…didn't mean to…please come back….I won't do it again…I'll be good…."

Severus froze. Harry's green eyes sought him out, misery and pain warranting his attention and Severus straightened slowly.

When had Harry ever been afraid of him? When had Harry ever feared his presence? Severus had promised Harry he would be here to take care of him and now it was because he had left in an angry huff that had caused his apprentice to think Severus had abandoned him.

Had Harry been calling for help? Was that what the buzzing bond had been about? And Severus or even Poppy hadn't even gone in to check upon him. They had assumed Harry would go back to sleep but how could he when they hadn't given Harry any medicine to settle him or allow him to draw strength from their presence?

Severus had been so angry he hadn't thought of what it would do to Harry if he left like that. Imagine if Poppy hadn't talked him into going back.

Harry was still babbling. "I'm not worth it but help me, please….tried calling for help but nobody came….I'll be quiet, I promise…please help…."

No doubt Harry had thought, as he had been taught to do, when nobody came when he called for help, that he was being punished. Could Severus feel any worse?

He sat down on the bed and stretched out a hand. Apparently he could as Harry backed away from him instinctively, nearly falling over the edge of the bed.

"Harry, it is Severus. I am sorry for the way I reacted earlier. It was not done to punish you but I was otherwise occupied. But it isn't an excuse. Will you forgive me?"

"But you're…angry with me….." Harry shuffled a little closer, shivering and wracking with sobs that were trying to break free.

"I was, Harry. You misunderstood me when I said that I didn't want to hold you. I do but I didn't want to force you to stay upright for so long. We seem to have misunderstood each other." He forced himself to be patient.

"You won't leave…." The plea was aimed at Severus and it shot true and went straight to his heart.

_Potters and green eyes are a true menace. _

Severus decided as he nodded. Realizing Harry couldn't see much he said. "I won't leave you unless you ask me to or I am called away. Does that satisfy you?"

Harry must have heard the sincerity in his voice because he nodded and then asked. "Help, please? It hurts…"

Reaching forward, Severus took Harry in his arms and pulled him against his chest. Soon the trembling body was within easier reach as Severus ran a careful hand through the sweat tousled hair and assessed the damage. Harry's throat was swollen and he felt hot to the touch.

Severus sat back against the headboard and drew Harry against his side as he shifted his legs onto the bed. He pulled the blankets up to cover them both as Harry wheezed out.

"I'm sorry…."

"Harry, if you say that you are sorry once more, I swear, you will be cleaning cauldrons for months once you are out of here." Severus could feel the strong fingers that held his shirt in a vice like grip. He put an arm around Harry's shoulders and held him.

Harry was afraid Severus was going to disappear. His apprentice trembled and Severus soothed a hand down Harry's back.

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Cold and hot….sleepy…and hurt everywhere…" Harry was using fewer syllables to not aggrieve his throat further. He was shivering and Severus carefully stroked Harry's forehead. He was hot to the touch but he wasn't running a fever.

Severus knew that burned skin felt incredibly hot but he wasn't surprised that Harry was cold. They had dressed the younger man in a simple shirt and slacks, not in a hospital gown and the air in the room was cool.

"Shall I get another blanket?"

Harry shook his head firmly but Severus could tell the younger man was cold and thus uncomfortable. He scowled at the messy bowed head and then sighed. He took a hold of Harry and pushed him away for a moment as he said.

"Stop acting the martyr, Mr. Potter. We have plenty of blankets here but if you are so keen to share body heat, all you had to do was say so. Stubborn Gryffindors."

It wasn't terribly long before Severus had arranged himself, and Harry, so that Harry was once more buried against his chest. The memories that rose of the first night spent like this with Harry in his arms, Severus pushed away. He didn't care to relive that night but as Harry settled in obvious comfort against him and finally settled down, Severus couldn't help but be glad that Poppy was a stubborn witch who had sent him back to check upon Harry.

Hp

His nose was buried in hair that smelled like smoke and Severus inhaled deeply as he woke up. He fought the urge to stretch, feeling the smaller body press against his own. Harry was deep asleep, one hand still gripping Severus' shirt and the other arm around Severus' waist. Severus couldn't have moved if he wanted to.

He wondered what had woke him up. Looking around, he couldn't detect anything out of the ordinary. Harry was sleeping soundly but then he glanced towards the door.

Poppy was talking to Minerva in a soft voice, gesturing with her hands towards Harry. By the grave expression on the Headmistress' face, Severus knew just what Poppy was telling her. He blanched when he realized that these women must have most likely already seen him sleeping with his apprentice.

He tried to untangle himself from Harry but Harry moaned softly when Severus tried to pull away. Severus sighed. He gathered Harry up in his arms and tried to push him away gently but Harry stubbornly held fast to his shirt. Feeling eyes upon him, he looked up and right into the faces of the two witches. They were smiling gently at him and Severus settled down with a huff as he hissed.

"Some help please."

With Poppy's help and Severus' whispered promise that he would be back soon, Harry had settled down and Severus was standing outside of the room, stretching his muscles and ignoring the smirk on Minerva's face.

"Do not even say it." He growled, rubbing at his neck. He ran a hand down his throat.

"Do not say what, Severus?" Minerva feigned innocence. Severus was not convinced.

"Whatever it is that you are thinking about at the moment. I was not cuddling or snuggling. I was merely offering comfort to my apprentice. I am sure you would do the same if the tables had been turned…"

"I doubt I would have crept into bed with them. I believe that we had this discussion before, Severus and you were quick to assure me then that you had no intention of teaching your apprentice _everything. _All you had to do was to say that you had changed your mind. You did not need to show it so evidently."

Severus could feel the color draining from his face. Had it looked like _that_ to an onlooker? He thought it had been innocent. A master and his apprentice sharing the same bed because the apprentice needed the comfort that only Severus could bring. Severus knew of the closeness of a true apprenticeship bond but he had no desire to form one with Potter.

Or had he? It would be fairly easy to demand that Potter come and stay in his rooms. Severus could do worse then to take Potter as a lover. But did he really want that?

He longed for companionship, and somebody to love just as well as everybody did. But he knew that he was a better man than most to just grab what was on offer. And how could he know that Potter wanted him and did he really want Potter?

He shook his head sharply. He didn't see Potter in such a light. Only recently had he learned of the secrets the younger wizard kept and saw the hurt Harry hid from everybody. It would have been so easy to cross that final step but Severus didn't feel that way about Harry, least of all now.

He glanced back into the room to buy himself time. He could take Harry as his lover now. He had Harry's trust but it would mean that Harry would be even more damaged.

Usually the strong and close relationship between a master and an apprentice resulted into them becoming lovers or sometimes more. Severus had kept himself guarded during his own two apprenticeships and he had no desire to form a commitment with Potter simply because he was the boy's master.

Perhaps in time…

"Do you find the idea so distasteful, Severus?"

His gaze shot up to meet Minerva's eyes before he whispered. "It isn't, Minerva but how can I in good conscious take Potter as a lover now? The boy is a mess and I don't mean what has happened to him in the past few days. Potter doesn't need somebody who is going to take advantage of him now but somebody he can be himself with and comfortable around…."

"I know, Severus, dear, but I just hope that for once you will let things unfold before you run away as you are known to do. You may be in for a true surprise then…"

"What on earth are you babbling about, Minerva? Unless you have been to Trelawney and she has predicted anything regarding my future with Potter…" Severus snarled but all he got was a sweet smile from the Headmistress, one that didn't ease him in the slightest.

What had she been talking about? Had she somehow known something that was going to happen? But that was just stupid. Minerva was not a seer. She could not predict the future, nor could she?

"Now, Severus, do not get any silly ideas in your head. It is merely advice from an old woman…"

"And old spinster you mean. You should have a pair of children that you can fuss over instead of me."

"Nobody can deny that you looked very sweet with Harry gathered up to you like that."

Severus could feel his face flush before he growled. "Surely you didn't come all the way up here to tell me that I looked sweet while sharing Harry's bed? I'm sure that you had other more pressing concerns."

Much to his satisfaction her smile diminished and her eyes darkened as she said. "That was the other reason I came up here. I came to check upon Harry but also to give you the news that the Aurors have Dennis Creevey in custody. They're willing to let you talk to him."

Rage shot through Severus so quickly that he had to force himself to stand still. He closed his eyes, fighting for control and not to storm down and hex Creevey into a bloody mess as he wanted to. He forced himself to be calm. It wouldn't do for him to lose control now and give the Aurors a reason to arrest him.

Minerva was watching him with a shrewd expression before she said. "I know that you will demand justice and you have every reason to do so but you cannot do anything wrong, do you hear me, Severus? They will take any excuse to whisk you away as well. I know that you have been exonerated but you know the Ministry just as well as I do."

Severus did not need the Headmistress to tell him about the Ministry. He was sure that if he had been living away from Hogwarts his life would have been even harder than it was now. Here he had the protection of the castle and a position of authority. While there were a lot of students who remembered his days as a Headmaster and all the things he allowed the Carrows to get away with, so far, the school year had been remarkably peaceful.

He didn't know what he would have expected but perhaps some form of punishment from the faculty or the students. But because the faculty all seemed to believe that he had been on the light side and therefore supported him, the students hadn't need to extend a punishment that they thought would befit a traitor.

It seemed that instead of Severus, Harry had been the one who had taken the full force of a student's need for revenge. Severus sighed as he glanced back at Harry. The younger male was sleeping peacefully at last.

"You will be present?" He asked his voice tight with anger.

And as Minerva nodded and Severus cast one last glance at Harry, he knew that he would make sure that justice was served, if only to see the light return to the beautiful green eyes of his apprentice.

Hp

Severus had been among many criminals and it always surprised him that the one who never looked the part could do the worst deeds. Dennis Creevey did not look like the Dark Lord, Bellatrix, or any of the other Death Eaters who had been responsible for some of the more horrible moments in the wars.

No, he looked like any other 15 year old. He looked bored and the dark hair was untidy like the latest fashion among the students. He was dressed in Hogwarts uniform but Severus could see the pale face. Dennis hadn't slept, well too bad, neither had Severus.

Dennis was seated at a table. A plate was in front of him and a glass. Both were empty. Severus kept his snarl inside. So the little criminal had eaten. Well, jolly good for him. There was a chance that Harry would not eat for a long time yet to come.

Severus suppressed a growl and instead walked in, banging the door shut as he said to the Auror on duty. "Leave us."

Dennis glanced up, almost as if he was bored but when he saw Severus he paled. Severus smirked. Good, the little brat was afraid of him, as he should be.

He stepped inside as the Auror gave him a nod and stepped outside. Severus had no doubt that they would be watching his every move but he didn't care.

He stalked forward, hearing the satisfied slam of the door behind him.

"Coming to the defense of your lover?" Dennis sneered but Severus could see by the wide eyes that the young wizard was afraid.

"Hardly! I have come to make a promise and get a confession out of you."

"There is nothing to confess. I did it. I threw the ingredient in Potter's cauldron! It is just a shame that I got caught doing it and that it didn't work. I would have turned myself in if it had."

"Oh would you now? You should be glad it didn't work in the way you intended for it to work because I will tell you, if it had, you would not have gotten out of here alive. Do not think that I would not have found you and did the same thing to you as you did to Harry." Severus' voice never wavered or rose in pitch but he knew that it carried the thread across he wanted to make.

He had years of experience in dealing with the most frightful of beings. Did this child really expect that Severus would be frightened by him? He had seen the Dark Lord kill Muggles just because they looked at him. He had seen Bellatrix torture people simply for the fun of it.

He had seen more things than some people did in a lifetime and Dennis assumed he would be freaked out because a student harmed another student intentionally? He had been on the receiving end of that when he was in his fifth year when a prank had nearly ended in him being killed and Lupin being put down.

But that had not been intentional, even when Severus had every right to believe it was, like Dennis attack was.

"You would not have dared." Dennis was bluffing.

"You believe so? I killed Headmaster Dumbledore, boy, so do not think that I would be incapable of doing to you what you did to Harry." Severus leaned forward.

"But Dumbledore was already dying. You just did him a favor." Dennis was genuinely frightened now as Severus allowed himself a smile. The Gryffindor glanced towards the door as Severus purred.

"Do you know what they're going to do to you, Dennis? Do you know what the punishment is for attacking another student? Especially the Chosen One."

Dennis shook his head.

"They will make you serve a lifetime in Azkaban. You are lucky not to get kissed. But I personally think that getting kissed would have been too light a punishment for you. They will make an example out of you, Dennis. You really chose an unfortunate time to try and get revenge for your brother."

"The time was just right, thank you very much." Dennis snapped.

"Oh it wasn't. You cannot comprehend how long a life is when you are still young. You will stay in Azkaban for nearly 100 years. That is a long time simply for wanting to get even."

"He bloody deserved it. It is his fault that Collin is dead!" Dennis rose to his feet, the mask finally cracking.

"Oh really? Was it him who wielded the wand that killed your brother? Did his lips utter the curse?" Severus used cold and hard logic and he could see how Dennis reacted as he shot forward and shouted.

"If he had given himself up then Collin wouldn't have died."

"Do you honestly believe that he wouldn't? Do you think that with Harry dead or in the Dark Lord's clutches he wouldn't have invaded Hogwarts next? It was high on his list and it wouldn't have been long before either the Carrows or somebody else would have become too annoyed with your brother's hero worshiping and they would have done it themselves. Do not try to blame this on Harry that your brother was a braver man that you will ever be."

"I am brave." Dennis stood in front of Severus, his fist balled.

"Oh really?" He sneered, glancing down his nose at the young wizard. "You used an underhand and sneaky way to try and kill somebody. If you had been an inch the man your brother was then you would have challenged Potter to a duel. Or are you afraid that you would have lost?"

Dennis didn't answer and bit his lip, glancing away.

"I think that you were afraid. You had no idea how powerful Harry was. He defeated the strongest wizard of all time so of course that would mean he had to be stronger. So how could you, an average student at best in Defense best him? Why, by tricking him and waiting for the right moment to strike. I will give it to you that you had to be a potions' genius to try and combine those ingredients. You must have known how they would react together…but not enough to kill him. Did you honestly believe you could get away with it?"

"He got away with my brother's death."

"But it was not his hand that held the wand that killed your brother." Severus snapped.

"But if he had given himself up, it wouldn't have happened." Dennis' voice was wavering.

"It may or it may not. You will never know. You cannot predict the future. Though in this instance I can. I can predict what you will be doing in 50 years time, or in 100 years for that matter. You will still be in Azkaban, rotting away with nothing to keep you company but your memories. Do not think that it won't drive you insane because it will. I can promise you that. But I have to ask, was it worth it?"

Dennis had paled even more at the mentioning of Azkaban. Did he really think he would be getting off light? Not if Severus could help it.

"It was if even for a second, Potter is hurting as bad as I am." Dennis tried to sneer but he failed miserably.

"Then you didn't even need to bother. Harry has lost his parents, his entire family to even his godfather so do not make any pretenses that you have lost more than he did." Severus growled. He was losing his temper.

"He is fine now, isn't he?" This time Dennis' voice cracked. Enraged, Severus moved in for the kill.

"You dare to show regret now? Harry has nearly died. Do you have any idea just what you have done? Of course you bloody do! His lungs and airway are damaged and it is most likely he will always have problems with his airway and lungs. He will be partly blind. He may never recover his voice because we are unsure of the damage. Do not dare to show regret now; it should have stayed your hand when you threw the ingredient in."

"I just wanted him to suffer…" Dennis' voice was small now.

Severus straightened and said coldly. "Trust me when I say that Harry didn't need your help for that!"

He turned on his heel and left. But before he opened the door he said. "I hope that your inner demons come to haunt you, child. Because if anybody deserves it, it is you."

"Don't leave. I didn't mean it like that. You can make them see…."

"No, Mr. Creevey, if one is responsible for such a deed, then one can bear the consequences. I wish you a good, long and healthy life in Azkaban." And as Severus shut the door and his ears to Dennis' pleas, his mind went back to the pleas of another and he hurried to Harry's room.

Hp

His mind more at peace than he would have dared to hope and his pride intact for not losing his temper and blasting Dennis Creevey to bits as he should have done, Severus' steps were light as he headed towards the Infirmary. It had gone better than he expected and since the bond was not buzzing in his mind, it must mean that Harry was at peace as well.

He quickened his steps when raised voices reached his ears. Something was going on.

_Can't they just grand Harry one moment of peace? I barely managed to get the brat to __lie down again, why do they feel like they need to make so much noise? _

But when he crossed the corner and went through the double doors, he didn't see the scene he thought he would see. Minerva was standing in front of the door that led to Harry's room. To Severus' pleasure the door was closed. Minerva was arguing with Ginevra Weasley.

Severus raised an eyebrow before he walked over. He could barely make out what they were saying but he had a faint idea of what was going on. The chit had woken up and probably demanded to be let back into Harry's room to do more damage.

His rage which he had kept tightly under control when he spoke to Dennis was slowly rising to the surface as he stepped closer so he could hear whatever was going on.

"Why can't I go back in? I have every right to be there. Harry shouldn't have to be all alone."

"Oh don't worry, Miss Weasley, Mr. Potter is not alone. He is being taken care of by _capable _people so you need not worry for his safety any longer." Severus sneered as he stepped up next to Minerva. He looked down his nose at the young witch who flushed an ugly shade of red.

"As if you could take care of anybody…." She began only to be interrupted by Minerva as the Headmistress said sternly.

"I must take offense for Professor Snape's sake. He has been taking excellent care of Mr. Potter. If it hadn't been for him then Mr. Potter would have suffered incurable damage…"

"I bet that he likes it just fine that his lover is unconscious and unable to think for himself so he can finally force himself upon Harry and not see the disgust in his eyes when he…."

"That will be fifty points from Gryffindor, Miss Weasley and you will serve a week's worth of detention with Mr. Filch. I suggest that you think carefully on your next words because I will hex you if you speak this plainly again." Severus was amused by the rage that crossed the girl's face.

She really had no idea what she had done by forcing herself upon his apprentice. Perhaps he should tell her what she had done. Let's see her handle that.

"But now that we are speaking about forcing ourselves upon somebody, then you are a fine one to talk, Miss Weasley. There is a reason a select few are allowed entrance into Mr. Potter's room, would you care to know more?"

"Oh you really think that you will keep me out? The moment Harry is awake he will be asking for me."

"I doubt he will be asking for somebody who put him in so much danger." Severus could feel Minerva's hand on his shoulder but he didn't back down. He would not endanger Harry again like last time. It was time that Weasley knew that she had nearly undone all the hard work Poppy had put into healing Harry.

Ginny had paled but she still stared at Severus with a hint of defiance in her eyes as she said. "I would never willingly endanger Harry."

"Oh but you already have, Miss Weasley. Has it never occurred to you why Miss Granger and your brother are not sitting at Mr. Potter's bedside as they have done in the past? Come now, child, you are a bright student, surely you can answer such a question, it is not too difficult."

Ginny glanced away before she hissed. "I am sure that you told them that they could not visit Harry…."

"I have told them no such thing. I know how vital one's loved ones can be at a time like this. No, it is because of the very nature of Mr. Potter's wounds…surely you have seen it yourself when you went into the room how Mr. Potter reacted to the smallest change in the room…"

"Severus, stop beating around the bush." Minerva was losing her patience and Severus' face lost the expression of amusement as he stepped closer to Ginevra Weasley and said.

"When you went into that room reeking of perfume, you nearly undid all the hard work Madam Pomfrey did on Harry's airway and lungs. I found him nearly choking because you were rough with him. He is sensitive to infection and if he does get one because you decided that you needed to see for yourself how much he was suffering, so help me, I will make sure that you will never lay eyes on him again."

"But I didn't intend to harm Harry…"

"You have! He broke up with you and you have gone out of your way to hurt him. Do not deny the rumors you have spread regarding Mr. Potter and myself. I have no desire to have you injure him further, intentionally or not. You will wait until Harry decides if he wishes to see you or not. If I see you at his bedside again without his knowledge or consent, I will take drastic steps."

"You can't do that…" Paleness was not a complexion of the skin that agreed with Ginny Weasley but at the moment, Severus could care less.

"Believe me when I say that intentionally harming another student is ground for expulsion, Miss Weasley and your status as a War Hero due to your family's efforts will not get you out from underneath any punishment. Now I suggest you leave before I come up with more suitable punishment for you."

"You can't order me away, only Harry can!"

Severus bared his teeth in a low growl as he leaned in and hissed into the foolish girl's face. "If I ever find out that you set foot in that chamber again, I will hex you straight into next year!"

It was a promise and it seemed that Ginny Weasley recognized it as such as she promptly burst into tears and ran out of the Infirmary. Severus was satisfied.

He turned back to Minerva to no doubt see a disapproving glance but she was smiling strangely at him. His hackles rose and he snarled before he could curb his temper.

"What now?"

"Oh nothing, Severus, I am just glad to see you protecting your apprentice. Now why don't you get back in there and sit with Harry. I am sure that Poppy will come to relieve you when it is time for supper."

Frowning as he tried to make sense of the Headmistress, Severus did as she said. He needed to get back to Harry anyway.

"Oh and Severus?"

He turned back to regard her as she smiled widely.

"When did he become Harry to you?"

And before he could answer, the Headmistress of Hogwarts transformed into her cat form and walked out, her tail held high and leaving Severus to wonder when indeed Potter had become Harry to him.

**That is it for now. **

**Now, I think that I have done a rather fantastic job in updating because the story is about 9000 words long. I get plenty of reviews for that of course. **

**In the next chapter: Severus is convinced that things are finally going to settled down for him and Harry and his apprentice can focus upon getting better. But the healing process is just starting. Will Harry be able to deal with the pain as Madam Pomfrey tries to wane him off the Dreamless Sleep? And can Severus stand to see his apprentice in pain? Or will some unsettling truths come out? That and more in: healing. **


	17. Healing I

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: thank you all so much for the amazing reviews. ****I don't know if any of you already heard this but I did mention it in some of my Christmas stories that my grandfather has got terminal cancer and therefore I will still write because I take comfort from it but it isn't a priority at the moment, my family is. I hope you can all understand that and therefore this chapter is dedicated to everybody who has ever lost loved ones. On another note when I was writing this chapter, somebody I love very dearly has died so this is dedicated to him. Let's begin.**

Harry had known many days of agony. There were the days when he had been punished and his wounds pained him so much that he could barely do his chores. Or the days when his stomach hurt so much because he hadn't eaten in so long that all he could think about was food. And then there were the days when the memories of all those people he had lost pressed upon him.

They were all different kinds of agony but eventually they all stopped being there when Harry fell asleep. But now, he couldn't even fall asleep.

What was wrong with him that everything had to hurt so much? Every time he took a breath it hurt, every time he moved it hurt, hell, it just hurt the entire fucking time.

He made a mewling noise in the back of his throat, hoping for some relief from the pain. His eyes opened but he only saw streaks of grey and white. Focusing hurt even more and he could feel the exhaustion he was hoping to escape in but so far it only hovered on the edge of his conscious instead of overwhelming him.

He knew that he was lying in a bed but even the very sheets and clothes he wore seemed to hurt his skin. He tossed and turned, trying to give into the numbness that had been there for the first couple of times he woke up.

He wanted Snape here. His master needed time away from him of course and why would Snape want to spend all his time at Harry's bedside anyway but he needed the comfort that Snape could bring.

The last few days blurred together. Harry only remembered the horror of knowing that something was wrong with his potion before it exploded and that pain overwhelmed him. Every time he had woken up since then had been to more agony but there had always been somebody here.

He was so tired…and so thirsty. He licked his lips, gagging at the horrible taste. He knew better than to call out. Calling out hadn't helped in the past and the last time Snape had become angry at him. So Harry suffered in silence, not once calling out even when tears fell from his closed eyes.

Hp

Softly humming in the back of his throat, Severus approached the Infirmary. Evening had fallen and while Poppy had told him not to come back tonight, Severus couldn't shake the feeling of wanting to return to Harry's bedside.

This would be the first evening for the younger wizard to go without the aid of Dreamless Sleep and Severus knew from personal experience how horrible such a night could be. The times when he had returned from the Dark Lord's side and was suffering from the aftereffects of the Cruciatus Curse had been plentiful when somebody had sat by his side when he was weaned off the Dreamless Sleep.

Slowly he rounded the corner to the corridor to the Infirmary only to be stopped by the last three people he expected to see.

"Mr. Malfoy, Mr. Weasley and Miss Granger, what a surprise." He sneered.

He crossed his arms over his chest and surveyed the students standing in front of him. Hermione Granger's eyes were red rimmed and Ronald Weasley wrapped an arm around the thin girl. Draco was the only one who looked like he had it together though his normally neat hair didn't look nearly so kempt as it normally was.

Severus raised an eyebrow when Weasley stepped forward and said. "Tell me if it is true?"

"Doubtless convenient as it would be to be able to read minds, Mr. Weasley, it isn't a skill I have acquired recently so please enlighten me as to what I should be confirming for you."

Weasley sighed angrily and then said. "My sister came in today and said that she was allowed at Harry's bedside. Why is she allowed and we are not? You and Madam Pomfrey said that Harry wasn't well enough to receive visitors and yet my sister, the one who hurt Harry, actually got to see him while we, his friends don't. I would even understand if Malfoy got to spend time with him but my sister…"

"And thank you very much, Weasley." Draco growled lightly but before Ronald could round on the youngest Malfoy, Severus answered.

"And did your sister divulge in what manner she got access to Potter's bedside or did she keep that information a secret?"

Much to Severus' glee he could see Weasley and Granger exchange uncertain looks.

"I see that she did not. She forced herself into the room, nearly undoing all the hard work that Madam Pomfrey and I have done to prevent any infections from reaching Mr. Potter. We purified the air in the rooms and set up Ventilator Charms that will purify the air every 15 minutes. Mr. Potter was dosed with Dreamless Sleep to prevent himself from working himself up into a state of activity which is discouraged at this point. Due to the nature of Mr. Potter's injury none of us can wear any scented shampoo, shower gell or any scent upon our clothing. Every time we enter the room, we have to sterilize our clothing to prevent bacteria from going into the room with us. Miss Weasley did none of those things…"

He had to take a deep breath to force down the rage that was threatening to rise to the surface even when he had dealt with the girl. "In fact she marched in there, reeking of perfume. I arrived barely in time to prevent Potter from choking but she was…. She could have done irreparable damage…if she had have been gentle with him then I could have understood but…"

His rage was leaving him incoherent and he forced himself to take a deep breath to try and gather himself. It seemed that he managed to get the message across because Weasley was looking at him horrified.

"She..." The younger wizard had to take a deep breath to steady himself as he continued. "…She did it on purpose?"

There was fear in the blue eyes but Severus shook his head. "I do not believe that she did. She didn't know that she was not allowed into the room but she was not gentle with Potter. I do not believe that she would willingly harm him but she should have known better. But she has seen the error of her ways, even when she cannot seem to fathom the reason why Potter would not like to have her at his bedside."

"After everything she did? Why would he?" Draco fumed.

"Because Potter has a very misplaced sense of duty sometimes. He thinks that he should allow everybody to trample over him without any regards for his own feelings. It is a habit that is hard to break but easy to understand given his…background."

Hermione's gaze snapped up to meet Severus' eyes as she said. "He told you that?"

Severus found himself flushing uncomfortably. The intelligent gaze was as piercing as Minerva's and as Lily's once had been and he answered. "He did not tell me as much as shouted at me when I pushed him too far. Had I known earlier I would not have treated Potter the way I did."

"But you were the one who alerted the Order back in Harry's fifth year."

"Yes, I did but I was uncertain of the circumstances. You must understand that the memories I saw in Potter's mind during our lessons were veiled at best. I did not have the time to examine them at leisure and see the true extend of the abuse those muggles inflicted upon him. I must confess that I relied on Professor Dumbledore's good sense not to send the boy to an abusive home."

He sighed loudly. It would be worth resurrecting Dumbledore just for this. _And the million other things the old coot still has to explain…I hope that there is judgment in the afterlife because if anybody deserves it, it is him._

"Father was right. Nobody could rely on Dumbledore, why leave a Gryffindor in charge when Slytherins could have done better." Draco's sneer was worthy of Lucius himself and Severus raised an eyebrow.

Granger turned to him with pleading eyes as she asked. "But Harry, what will happen to him now?"

"Yeah, when can we see him?"

Severus glanced around the deserted corridor and then gestured for them to enter an abandoned classroom. "We shall talk in here. I have no desire to have the whole world hearing about this. We have managed to keep this quiet for the most part and that is how it shall remain. Potter has enough to worry about at the moment without the Wizarding World beating down the gates for a chance for pictures and some famous last words. Potter isn't up for it."

"Then what is he up for, Professor? Is he up for visitors? We would like to visit him and I am sure it would make him feel better."

Severus had to admit that something inside him softened at the three young adults standing in front of him. They all wore looks of worry, some better masked than others but the same emotion was there in all of them. He sighed and ran a weary hand through his hair before he said.

"I shall tell you about Potter but be aware that we do not know the full extent of his injuries yet. Only time will tell what will remain of his eyesight and what the full damage to his lungs and airway shall reveal…."

Severus debated what to tell them because it was never easy to be the messenger of bad news but they deserved to know. It was better that Severus told them and so he did. He didn't leave anything out, knowing that these students could handle whatever he told them.

He was gentle about it but he knew better than to mollycoddle them. Granger buried her face in Weasley's neck and Weasley had paled considerably. Even Draco looked sick and when Severus finished telling them all he knew, Weasley stuttered out.

"But he will survive right?"

"He will live but as I have said before, the full extent of his injuries is unknown."

"And there is a remote chance that he may have permanent difficulties with his airway and lungs and that he may become blind or have severely compromised eyesight?" Draco's voice shook faintly.

"It is a possibility, yes."

"Can we at least go and visit him? Or at least see him? I don't care if I have to suffer through a hundred spells, he cannot spend this time alone. It is horrible for him…" Granger's voice was choked with tears.

"He hasn't been alone. I have been spending as much time as possible at his bedside…"

Severus couldn't even finish the sentence because Granger threw her arms around him and hugged him, bawling into his chest. Perplexed, Severus merely patted her shoulder. He stared wide eyed at Draco, begging silently for aid because this seemed to be a recent development that Gryffindors were crying all over his robes and Severus wasn't so sure he liked it.

Hp

"I am so sorry, Professor. I didn't know what came over me." Severus' hand twitched towards his wand as he considered hexing the girl if she apologized once more. She had done so for the past ten minutes.

"Miss Granger, if you even so much as think of apologizing again, you will be serving detention until the end of the school year, war hero or not." He promised silkily instead.

Granger hid a smirk and nodded. "Of course, Professor."

"But that still does not tell us what to do with Harry. Can we go and visit him, Professor? Or at least see him?"

Severus hesitated. He had been the only one who had been sitting at Harry's bedside for the past two days and while he understood why it would benefit Harry to see somebody else besides him a small part of him couldn't help but wish to keep Harry separate and all to himself.

For the past few days he had been the only one who could comfort Harry. Not even Poppy's medication could settle his apprentice as he could and it made him feel good that there was somebody out there who needed him. If he allowed Potter's friends back in…

_Stop being selfish. You want what is best for Harry and not for yourself. It does feel nice to be needed but you are the boy's master, he will need you throughout the __year that is the point of having an apprentice. Let the boy have his friends there, it may help him._

"I will discuss it with Madam Pomfrey. She may have other reasons not to have you there because Harry is still very weak." He eventually said. It was no promise by any stretch of the imagination but it had to do.

Besides, soon he would have plenty of time alone with his apprentice. If Minerva continued her plan, and there was no doubt that she would, Harry would move into Severus' room.

_I wonder what he will think of that. Most likely he wouldn't be too thrilled with it but there isn't much I can do about that. He will need a safe place to __recover in private and what better rooms than my quarters? They are certainly big enough and it is in honor with the traditions of master/apprentice sharing rooms together. Though it will be harder to teach Harry my craft for the appointed year. There will be a delay, if I can teach him at all so I will contact the Guild for any ideas. _

He shook himself briefly, knowing that if he allowed himself, he would go into his brainstorm mode and that was best saved for another time. Granger and Weasley were talking softly to one another, lost in the way only lovers were but Draco was watching him.

The grey eyes regarded him and then Draco approached as he said. "What is going to happen to Potter now?"

"Like I said before, we don't know. It just depends on whatever comes out when Madam Pomfrey does the tests when Harry has recovered a little more."

"You really care for him, don't you?"

Severus turned towards Draco, raising an eyebrow. His mouth tightened in a scowl as he said. "I believe that it is none of your business if I do, Mr. Malfoy. He is my apprentice; of course I want what is best for him."

"Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad to think about what is best for you and Potter…." Draco's smirk was nearly precisely Lucius and Severus felt his temper rise.

"This is not a conversation I am going to be having with you, Draco!" It was one thing to have this conversation with Minerva and Poppy but not with Draco, that was just too unsettling. He refused to even consider Potter as a lover, not until the younger male was healed and therefore could make these decisions for himself.

It didn't matter that most apprentice/master relationships usually ended up in them becoming lovers because of the closeness of the master and apprentice but Severus wasn't going to consider it. He didn't exclude it either but it wasn't something he was comfortable thinking about when Harry was still so weak.

It almost felt as if the younger male had no choice in the matter then and Severus refused to even take that step. It made him feel as though he was doing things against Harry's will and while he knew it wasn't the case, it wasn't something he was comfortable with. He had always wanted explicit consent from his partners.

It wasn't as if Severus had that many lovers. Deliberately he had kept himself at a distance. One was not a successful spy with a very active love life. He had regretted it sometimes but after what had happened to Lily, he knew that he never wanted to go through such heartbreak ever again, and that was just for a friend.

No, Severus loved rarely but when he did he loved deeply. He had always longed for a companion to complete him in so many ways. He envied Lucius for that. No matter what the older wizard did, he would always have somebody to come home to and to be himself around. Severus carried more secrets than any other men he knew and he could not confide in anybody.

He shook his head sharply. That was all in the past. He was free now and he could find a lover or a husband if he so desired. But first…and the bond buzzed in his mind, he had an injured apprentice to care for and Severus knew that at the moment, all his attention would go to Harry.

Hp

_I really need to return to Harry's bedside, it has been too long since I have been away from him. _

Heeding the buzzing in his mind, Severus strode from the abandoned classroom, leaving Weasley and Granger alone. Quick footsteps followed him and Severus glanced over his shoulder.

"Sir, wait up, I will walk with you…"

"Whatever for, Draco? Are you trying to get access to Potter? Have a taste for revenge perhaps?"

Draco faltered in his step and after a careful hand on Severus' forearm the older Professor turned back to his student. Draco's grey eyes rose up to meet his own and then Draco said. "I haven't wanted revenge on Potter for a long time, Severus. I understand that he was a casualty of the war just as much as I was and that he lost more than I did. He never fought his fate or even pitied himself but he showed true character and plowed on. I was always whining about mine, even when I should have just stood up…"

Draco's hand went to his left forearm but Severus didn't pay attention to it. He hadn't been there when Draco had been marked. He suspected that Draco had been marked during the Easter Holidays because it was the only time that Draco had been away from Hogwarts. Severus had cursed himself that he allowed Draco to be marked.

"You would not have survived a day. Stronger people than yourself have stood up to The Dark Lord and died defending themselves. Sometimes the best way to save yourself is hide oneself in plain view. You could not have fought him off, no matter how you may have wanted to."

"But it would have made Potter's fights a lot easier."

"Or a lot messier, depending on how one looks at it."

Draco sighed and then said, falling into step beside Severus. "Well, we will never know, will we? But I do want to help him now. He doesn't deserve to be all alone and in pain. You have to leave him every time you are called away, who is going to stay with him then?"

"And you are suggesting that you are going to be that one? It would be better if Weasley or Granger read to him." Severus sneered. He glanced down to see Draco's eyes narrow as he continued. "You may have extended the hand of friendship to Potter, which I am glad that you did and he may have accepted but you do not know the first thing about him. Potter is not the confident young man he tries to be. He is hotheaded and headstrong, yes but there is another side to him that he does not allow a lot of people to see. Potter is in a vulnerable position right now, Draco. You could do more damage than good, even when you don't intend to."

"I want to help, Severus. You are already exhausted and soon you will run yourself into the ground. You are still recovering and you can't be there every time…."

Severus felt himself flush uncomfortably as he lashed out. "And who do you think you are, Mr. Malfoy, to speak to me in such a manner? You may be my godson but nobody will speak to me in such a way…."

He felt a hand on his shoulder and while he tried to snatch it away, Draco held fast and said. "It isn't only for you, Sev but for Potter as well. I know how much you are risking with taking him on as an apprentice but it doesn't mean that you have to destroy yourself. You need to look after yourself as well. So just accept my help, why don't you?"

The grey eyes were concerned and finally Severus allowed himself to relax. Draco reminded him of Narcissa whenever Severus and Lucius had gone to see the Dark Lord and came back to Malfoy manor. Narcissa fussed over them both, making Severus jealous of Lucius because he had somebody to share the experience with while Severus had to return to his cold and empty bed.

He nodded and then said. "We should go. Potter is growing restless."

He never said that he would allow Draco at Harry's bedside but his godson's concern touched him and as Severus kept his mask in check, inside his heart warmed just a little bit more.

Hp

Draco Malfoy had never been one to play by the rules. They could either be broken or bent to ones will or in such rare cases, gold could persuade to forget certain rules, well all in all, gold went rather a far way.

But ever since the war had ended, and Draco had learned the hard way that gold did not soothe all things, he had started to pay attention to the rules, even unwritten ones. There had been a time when he would have gotten away with murder and nearly had…but that time had passed.

He had been brought to the normal world with a rather loud smack. It still smarted to this day but in the end, he supposed he should be lucky that he had escaped alive and rather unharmed from the war. Some had not been so lucky…

Such as Harry. His thoughts returned to his year mate. Harry had been at the center of the war. The one who it had all come down to and rather then have peace now, here he was, wounded in a bed. That was the reason Draco listened carefully as Madam Pomfrey and Severus Snape told him what he needed to expect and do to sit at Harry's bedside.

His mind reeling with the information, Draco had showered, dressed in clothes disinfected by Madam Pomfrey and had allowed her to cast charms on him to sterilize his clothing. Draco turned his nose up at the stench of the spell.

"You understand what we have told you. Mr. Malfoy? You are not to touch Mr. Potter needlessly though he may allow you to take his hand. You are not to be rough with him or cast spells upon his person. If you see that he is working himself up, you shall come and collect me at once. He must be kept calm under every circumstance that is the most important."

"I understand, Madam Pomfrey." She appeared pleased and then glanced at Severus, nodded at him as she said.

"He has been restless, Severus since you have been away but I have not had the time to check up upon him. Minerva and I have been working on the new wards to discourage other students to go and visit Harry. The monitor charm has gone off a few times but there is nothing I can do. I cannot give him any more pain medication because the Dreamless Sleep has to be out of his system. His pain is intense and I think that it may even go above the pain potion that I have given him…"

The Potions Master carefully laid a hand on her shoulder and said. "I will see what I can do, Poppy. Perhaps Harry needs somebody there who can take his mind off of things."

Draco felt like he was intruding on something private. He glanced between them. Severus' face was pale but determination shone in the dark eyes and Madam Pomfrey looked like she had not slept in days. Draco understood that these two had been there since the very beginning, settling Potter down and dealing with him and the injuries he had sustained. It must have been hard on the both of them.

He glanced up at his godfather. Snape's face seemed chiseled out of stone, pale and harsh. The dark eyes were dim in the harsh daylight but Draco knew of the suffering of Severus. Even now the graceful hands trembled with an unsuppressed weariness and the swathe of bandage at the pale throat stood out against the dark clothing.

_Severus should be the one recovering, instead of looking after Potter. And yet I have never seen him so happy as during these past few weeks. He likes having an apprentice. He likes to be able to pass his craft on and Potter suits him. They may bring out the worst emotions in each other but he brings out Severus' passion as well. Severus has to adapt to handle Harry and it will benefit Harry to see that not everybody is out to get you. Severus takes his craft very seriously and this apprenticeship was what he needed. He needed to be able to focus upon a future and to look forward again instead of living in the past. I think that Potter is capable of showing him that. Even now…_

The dark eyes caught his and Draco smiled. It was a tight lipped smile but something in Severus' stance seemed to relax. Perhaps it was the fact that he found a kindred soul in Draco, one who understood his suffering and how hard the life was now that everything they had worked for was done and they were at loose ends.

_I wonder if he even realizes that he is a free man. He can do what he pleases now. He looks so lost, almost the same when he killed Dumbledore. I think that is why Professor McGonagall put Potter in his care. He needs to have a new goal and he needs to learn to live. Potter needs to learn this as well and perhaps they can experience it together. But now…now we aren't even sure what quality of life Harry will have. _

He sighed. He had never understood Potter as he did now. He always saw a spoiled child who was given everything but only now, when he had fought in the war himself and had been used against his will, could he understand what Harry had gone through.

Lucius had allowed him to be Marked to save him. If his father hadn't, Draco would have been dead now. Hell, if it hadn't been for his godfather he would have been. Draco would rather have that his father had possessed the courage that Severus had. He should have stood up to the Dark Lord and refused to allow Draco to be Marked.

If only he possessed some of Potter's or Severus' courage…

_But look at where they are now. Severus is still recovering from that snake bite and Harry is severely wounded. This should have been a time of peace…a time of new friendships and __rebuilding. _

"Draco?" His grey eyes shot up to meet those of his godfather.

"Yes?"

"Are you ready to go visit Potter?" Snape's voice was guarded and Draco nodded.

"Alright then, be prepared that he will not look like you remember. His skin is reddish and blistered and his hands are bandaged. He is vulnerable and may lash out. He uses magic uncontrollably so do not be alarmed when he will recoil from you. I will be with you every step of the way…"

Draco nodded. He was ready. He followed Severus to the room in which Harry was kept. He felt the powerful wards wash over him. Their complex magic recognizing his own magical core and then allowed him through.

The scentless air in the room irritated him for a moment but after he carefully breathed out and in, he allowed his body to adapt to the changes. He glanced about the room.

It was windowless and the lights were kept low. There was a bed in the middle of the room and beyond there; Draco noticed a doorway that led to a small private bathroom. There were two chairs on either side of the bed and a bed stand on the right side of the bed.

Satisfied that the room was good enough, he focused upon Potter. What he saw shocked him. Gone was the confident young man and instead was replaced with a shivering boy. Draco thought he had been prepared to see Potter but now he knew better. The younger male was only recognizable by his mop of black hair and the green eyes.

Harry's skin was red, especially on his face and on his arms. His green eyes were slightly reddish and the lips were blistered. Harry wheezed for breath but Draco could clearly see the tear tracks on the pale cheeks. Harry had been crying.

A few years ago he would have been gloating and making fun of Harry but he found he couldn't. Only pity rose inside of him, especially when Severus sat down beside Harry and Harry turned towards the older wizard.

It spoke of the trust between them when Harry didn't so much as flinch from the hands of his master and instead leaned into him, seeming to connect safety with Severus.

"It hurts….help please…" Harry's voice was a raspy, breathy whisper of what it normally was.

Draco took a good look at Severus' face as the older man said. "I wish I could, Harry but I cannot. I am sorry but you have to understand that we cannot drug you anymore. I know that you wish to sleep and I would help you if I could but I would not be helping you if I gave you more potions now."

Harry keened in his throat, raspy sounds of pain and Severus ran a careful hand down the rigid spine of his apprentice. His fingertips carefully brushed tears away and then Draco focused upon Severus.

His godfather's face was wretched, as if looking at Harry hurt him. How must it be to Severus to see his apprentice in pain and turning to him for aid yet knowing that he couldn't do anything to help him? The black eyes were trained on Harry's face as he hungrily searched the green eyes that expressed pain.

"I have brought somebody with me to visit you."

Harry stiffened but then Severus gestured for Draco to come closer and he did so, saying. "Hey, Harry. It's Draco…"

"Malfoy?" The name slipped off the blistered lips in a rush of breath and Draco nodded, smiling. He frowned when Severus shot him a glare and then realized Harry couldn't see him nodding.

"Yeah, it is me. Do you mind if I sit down? It is a very nice room and….yeah it looks good…you can't see it of course, stupid of me…" He realized he was rambling as Severus snapped at him.

"Just sit down, Draco and shut up!"

Draco did as he was told. He glanced at Harry, who was content to sit curled up at Severus' side. The young wizard smiled a tense smile, as if Draco's rambling had eased something inside of him.

_Dear Merlin, what does one say to a new friend? I can talk to Potter about Quidditch or even what has happened in the war but he can barely speak. What would I like to know had I been in his position? _

His gaze turned towards his godfather and immediately Draco knew what he could talk to Potter about. His smirk would have done Lucius proud and made Severus very suspicious if the Potions Master had been looking at him.

Hp

Harry tried to relax and ignore the pain as he lay curled against Snape's thigh. It didn't bother him that Malfoy was here. In fact, he liked it. Now Snape wouldn't have to be bothered with sitting at his bedside the entire time and would he have somebody else to talk to.

He grew aware that he wasn't only feeling Snape's complex and familiar magic but something else tingled just beyond his sense as well. He focused upon it and reached out with his senses. It was magic, not that powerful, well powerful enough but not powerful and subtle like Snape's magic.

It also did not possess the complexity of his master's magic. _That must be Draco._ Harry decided. _Perhaps magic matures just as the witch or wizard does and grows more complex with age. _ It was a thought he could think about when he felt better.

He leaned against Snape's firm side, breathing shallowly to try and stay atop of the pain. Nothing irritated his airway or lungs and for that he was glad. He was tired and yet he couldn't seem to find a place to sleep.

He told himself not to get used to sleeping with Snape because it couldn't last. When he was released from the Infirmary he would have to have his own set of rooms or go back to the Gryffindor Tower. He glanced around the room but beyond the grey spots that severely compromised his vision he didn't see much except for blurred outlines.

He didn't want to admit it but the grey spots frightened him. Madam Pomfrey was concerned about him, he knew but he hadn't heard what they had said. He was so tired…yet unable to sleep.

Hearing commotion outside of the room, Harry turned towards the sound. Snape tensed and then stiffened. Harry had grown tense as well. He could not make out what it was about but then Snape growled.

"Excuse me for a moment."

The very timbre of his master's voice promised immediate danger and Harry shivered in response. He was carefully pushed away so he could sit up on his own but yet he toppled over. Snape cursed before other hands than those of his master helped Harry to sit up, careful of his injuries.

"Oh damn this! Why does he pick now to come and…."

"I will stay with Harry, Sev. You go and deal with this…"

While speaking hurt and touching somebody hurt as well, Harry still reached out to touch Snape's robe as the older wizard spun around to leave. Snape turned back to him and he whispered. "Come back later…?"

He phrased it like a question, not wishing to be rebuked for such a simple request but when Snape's hand touched his head for a moment in a gentle caress that carded through his hair as he said. "Always."

The promise settled Harry and he finally relaxed as his master left and Draco stayed behind.

Hp

Draco was careful when he held Harry steady. The younger man's plea tore at his heart.

"Draco?"

"I am here, Harry." It seemed to satisfy the young Gryffindor because Harry relaxed. Draco allowed Harry to settle himself against the headboard of the bed as he drew the blankets up carefully. He went back to sit in the chair.

The silence fell between them, heavy and thick as Harry wheezed for breath sometimes. But the younger male seemed to be uncomfortable and in pain. Draco glanced at his new found friend to see the green eyes falling closed and the pinched look Harry's face took on.

"Should I go and get Madam Pomfrey?"

The green eyes opened and Harry shook his head.

"Shall I tell you about….about Severus?" After flaunting for a topic which presented itself in a moment as he remembered that Harry didn't know that much about his master.

Harry fixed him with a look and then said in a small voice. "Yeah…I would like that…"

The shy smile on Harry's face was putting him more at ease and Draco began to speak.

"Now, I know that you think that you may know Severus since he is your master but as I have told you before, he is my godfather. So I know things about him that not many other people know, or when they knew them they would make fun of him. Severus is an immensely private man and you should feel lucky that you are able to benefit from his knowledge about Potions."

Noticing that he had Harry's full attention, Draco smiled. He sat himself down in a more comfortable position and continued.

"As I have said before, Severus is a very private man but he is also incredibly loyal. He is a man of his word as you may have noticed…."

"He always promises to come back…even when he hates me…" Harry coughed.

"I doubt he hates you any longer. He wouldn't have taken you on as an apprentice. He hates people who are incompetent in his field and do not take up their share of the work. You may have noticed that he doesn't have much patience for students in his class who are incompetent and who refuse to try to get better. He dislikes laziness and he can hold a mean grudge. He hates people who try to gain attention through the use of others and he dislikes people who make mistakes deliberately in order to stand out. He will not tolerate weakness in anybody because he always sees it as a thing to be explored by his enemies and to use. I always thought that if he had somebody who showed him that weakness is not meant to be explored but sometimes can be shared and allow two people to get closer…."

"Somehow…I sense a…sad…story in there…."

Draco blinked, he hadn't even thought about it like that. He grinned suddenly as he nodded and said. "Perhaps you are right. Though I doubt that Severus would allow us to call it that. And I suppose it isn't, considering what he has been through. Severus is too strong and as I have said before, very loyal. Once he views somebody as a friend or more, he will go to whatever lengths to protect that person, even from himself…"

"My mother…." Potter wheezed.

"What about your mother?" Draco frowned, that was one story he hadn't heard.

"Snape was in love with her….they were friends…..he did everything for her…turned spy for her…everything…he said he always loved her…and he protected me for her…"

Suddenly a lot more things made sense to Draco. _So _that was the reason why Severus never had a partner. It did explain a lot. Lucius and Narcissa had tried to introduce Severus to a score of bright young witches but he had always made them cry with his acid tongue.

Perhaps suffering from unrequited love cause Severus to become so bitter. Draco knew that Severus loved deeply and yet….it still didn't make any sense.

He had seen his godfather once with a man. It was when he was a child himself and he had walked in on an empty room (or so he had thought) when there was a party at the manor. Lucius had invited all sorts of people, even going as far as to use talented men and women from an expensive brothel in London to entertain his guests.

Draco had been put to bed by his nanny but he had woken up later in the evening. His nanny must have gone off to enjoy the festivities himself and Draco had walked to the library, entering the dark room when he heard the voice of his beloved godfather.

When he had entered the room, Severus had been there, with another man. The other man was in a state of undress and they had been kissing. But at the time Draco hadn't understood. When he had called out Severus' name the Potions Master had pulled away as if he had been burned.

Severus had come to collect him immediately, speaking in a low voice to the other man. Draco had been confused at the time but he had never spoken to Severus about it. He wasn't sure what it meant what he had seen. It had only been once but he had never seen Severus with another partner, man or woman. Not that Lucius had ever dared to throw such a party again after Narcissa was through with him.

But what had been the reason that Severus never had a relationship. Did he think it was too dangerous? Or had he never found somebody he cared about? Or was there another reason? He refocused his attention on Potter. The younger man was trying to pay attention but Draco knew that he was really taxing Harry.

He patted Harry's hand and said. "Don't let it bother you. I know that Severus has other reasons for protecting you. Why don't you go to sleep? I am sure that it will make you feel better."

"I...can't sleep very well….without Severus here…."

"I am sure that he will come back soon. Why don't you just relax and I will sing you a song?"

It didn't matter that Draco had a terrible voice; he could entertain Harry until Severus got back. And it gave him time to think because really, just how many times had Severus sat with Harry? He may be dedicated to his craft but not to this extent, he hadn't even done it with Draco when he had been wounded.

Or could it have been another reason and one that had nothing to do with Potter's mother but with Potter himself? Draco knew the deep connection between masters and their apprentices so he knew where this could lead.

But could he really allow Severus to fall for Potter and vice versa? Or could he perhaps encourage them? Because as he looked at Harry and contemplated Severus, these two deserved every amount of happiness they could achieve.

Hp

Blissfully unaware of whatever Draco was telling Harry about, Severus instead focused upon the people standing in the Infirmary. His eyes narrowed as he stalked out of the room, his robe snapping about his legs.

Minerva turned towards him immediately, holding up her hands as she said. "Now, please stay calm, Severus. Harshly spoken words will not get us anywhere and we are all here with a common goal."

"Oh and what is that?" Severus sneered. His black eyes roamed over Professor Slughorn's body as the older Potions Master gulped and he hid away. Fillius Flitwick was standing beside the older Professor but the tiny Charms Master didn't shy away from Severus' gaze.

He raised an eyebrow at Minerva and then asked, silkily. "Pray tell what the common goal is, Headmistress?"

The elderly witch frowned at him but Severus merely allowed a smile to grace his lips. He knew it made him even more dangerous before she said. "Let us wait for Poppy. Ah here she comes…"

Poppy came to stand beside Severus and Severus crossed his arms over his chest. He longed to return to Harry's bedside but he wanted to know the real reason why Slughorn was here. He thought he had been explicitly clear when he had said that the other Potions Master was not to be near Harry's bedside ever again.

He would have to be blind not to notice the vial Slughorn had in his hand. It was a colorless potion but Severus didn't recognize it. He had a clear idea however who it could be for. There was nobody else in the Infirmary but Harry.

But he held his tongue. He wanted this out in the open. Let's see how Minerva responded before he would jump to conclusions. He still had to talk to her about moving Harry down to his rooms when the younger wizard could safely be moved.

Horace turned towards Poppy, grateful that she was there. "I heard from Minerva that you had need of a medication that would help Mr. Potter's lungs and airway. I have brewed two potions that should aid Mr. Potter marvelously and will guarantee almost immediate results. I have brewed a tracea tonic and the lacertus pulmo. The trial run has been most successful in St. Mungo's and I am sure that any specialist will approve of my method…"

"You mean to tell me that you have brewed two potions which have not been approved either by the Guild of Healers of St Mungo's or the Potions Guild? And that you mean to test them on Mr. Potter without consent from St. Mungo's or either of the Guilds in what these potions can do when they are combined?" Severus' voice was a deadly whisper.

Slughorn had gone pale and even Fillius, who was normally in good spirits had the sense to keep quiet.

Severus took a step forward until he stood directly in front of Horace Slughorn and towered over the other Potions Master. "You continue to baffle me! I told you not to come near my apprentice again after you failed in your task as a tutor to secure your student from harming Harry Potter and yet you go out of your way to brew potions which have not even been tested or even approved by the healers and you actually think that I would let you test them on Potter? Haven't you done enough? Was I not explicitly clear that I told you not to come near Potter again?"

Slughorn visibly shrunk but Severus didn't care. His voice was dripping lower with each passing word as rage threatened to overwhelm him. He took a deep breath to try and calm himself.

He had always kept a tight control on his emotions and he would not snap simply because of this man.

"They will help him, Severus. You have not seen the miracles these potions have done for some patients in St. Mungo's who had to rely on charms to breathe…"

Poppy stepped up beside him and if Severus had been on the receiving end of the look she was giving Horace now, he would have turned tail and fled. The power in the small normally calm mediwitch was frightening to behold as she forced Severus aside and said.

"You really think that you can march in here and test those potions on my patient? What if they do not work or heaven forbid, make it worse? I will not have you bring harm to any of my students. You will not use any of my patience as a guinea pig for your test potions. I refuse!"

Slughorn flinched from her fierce tone and Severus smirked as he added the final blow. "And you will move away from this room this moment. I will not have you near Harry Potter…"

"You may need my help with the boy, Severus…"

"I will be dead before that day ever comes. I will ask the Guild to send me an assistant so I do not have to deal with you because I fear that if I allow you near Potter, it will be the death of the boy."

"I am his Professor…"

"Not anymore." He snarled as he turned towards the Headmistress to address his next issue of concern. "Headmistress, I would request, that as Harry Potter's master and guardian, he will be moved to my rooms the moment he is allowed out of the Infirmary. He will need a place to recuperate in private once he is strong enough to leave the Hospital Wing."

"I shall add extra rooms to your quarters, Severus. You were aware that this was a possibility all along, right, my dear, all you had to do was say the word."

He turned back towards Minerva. "Yes, Minerva, I knew but my quarters were the last place that was free of the menace of students and you know how much I value my privacy. …."

The thin lips of the Headmistress curled up into a smile as she said. "I am glad that you have changed your mind for your apprentice. I am sure that Harry will be quite enough to your liking."

He merely nodded because he knew that only time would tell if Harry's voice would fully come back. And while he may value his silence and his privacy, he would give anytime to hear Harry laugh again because really, the road to recovery would be filled with tears and those were the one thing he didn't wish upon Harry but he knew that he would be there to wipe them away and at the moment, it would have to be enough.

**Okay so that didn't go entirely as planned. Somehow, the whole Harry and Severus bonding I had planned went ****completely in the other direction. I shall simply move that to the next chapter then. I still hope you liked this one. I want to wish everybody a Merry Christmas and a good new year because I can't finish the next chapter in time. I have decided to cut this chapter in two as well. Review of course and tell me what you think.**

**In the next chapter: Having been given new insight in his master by Draco Malfoy, can Harry see his master in a new light and connect the caring Snape he has seen with the old stern Potions Master he knows? And will he allow Snape to help him? Can Severus still protect Harry or will he doubt himself? And can Severus protect Harry from Harry's biggest enemy, namely himself? That and more in: Healing II **


	18. Healing II

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter.**

**Note: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews. I know it has been forever since I last updated and I'm sorry for that but life is quite hectic at the moment. Let's begin.**

Manners were important in the correct circles of society, Harry knew that, even when he had never had a proper education concerning etiquette. He may not know which fork or knife to use for which course or when to drink red or white wine but he knew that one should hold their hand in front of their mouth when they yawned or coughed. He also knew it was not very polite to fall asleep when somebody was talking, such as right now.

But he couldn't help himself. He was so tired and for a moment the pain had subsided enough when Draco was busy with entertaining Harry with rumors about Hogwarts. He tried to keep his eyes open but for some reason it didn't seem to work.

"Am I that much of a bore that you cannot keep yourself awake, Harry?" Harry tried to see Draco but all he saw was a blur. Clearing his throat hurt so he merely shook his head instead, dismay rising up inside of him.

He knew it was rude to fall asleep when somebody came to visit and talked to him. Surely Draco had better things to do with his time than to sit with him. Who would like to be with him anyway? Snape had to because it was his duty and…

He tried to focus on Draco and he tried to keep his breathing steady. Sitting up however was too much and he slowly sank back down against the pillows.

"It is alright, Harry. I understand that you are tired. You can go to sleep. I will remain here and wait until Professor Snape returns." Draco's voice was soothing and no matter how much Harry tried to keep himself awake, he couldn't fight it any longer and he fell into a deep sleep filled with horrible memories.

His sleep was usually deep and he didn't dream but he knew that it was because of the Dreamless sleep potion. But now he tossed and turned in his sleep and it wasn't long until he woke up again, gasping for breath.

His chest burned and his throat hurt and he stared around in search of relief. For the first time ever he was alone and the only sound in the room was his harsh breathing. From habit he glanced about the room but it was dark and he couldn't see much more than before…

_Can I really be blind? And…can I live with this? Or will I live with this?__ What will my future be like? _

His fingers searched for the bracelet around his wrist but it wasn't there. Trying not to panic, it had probably been misplaced; Harry reached out with his magic. The room was empty and there was hardly any trace of Snape's familiar magic.

He sat up quickly, staring around the room. The bracelet had to be here somewhere. He moved his mouth, trying to find the words but his throat was parched dry and no words were forthcoming.

He tried again.

"_Accio _Harry's bracelet."

He held his hand out but nothing came zooming out at him. He glanced around, surely it couldn't be far. Perhaps he hadn't spoken loudly enough? He tried again and still nothing.

He sighed, surely his magic wasn't going funny….He couldn't handle it if that was to happen as well. He sighed again. He had never felt like this before. He felt defeated and like crying. Even when Sirius had died he had known that he was fighting for a better world.

True, the years had been hard and he had been scared and he had seen a fair number of things that he would rather forget but he feared that he would never be able to but…he had always held hope. He had known that the war would end, someway or another. Either he would die or he would live to see another day. He had done both but still…

And now? Now he was adrift in a world that consisted of grey patched, blurred images and pain. And he had no way of knowing if he was ever going to make it out of here and if it would get better. So Harry did the only thing he could do, he broke down and he cried even harder when even his very tears hurt.

He wasn't even sure why he was crying so hard. He had rarely done this before but once it began, he couldn't seem to stop.

Hp

Severus' eyes narrowed in a glare as he watched Slughorn as the whale of a man walked around the Infirmary to collect his potion samples. He tried not to appear too tense but he knew he was radiating anger, as he often did.

The bond distracted him from his thoughts concerning Slughorn. It buzzed irritably in his mind and Severus frowned. He glanced about. Draco had come out of Harry's room a while ago, telling him that Harry had fallen asleep.

"Poppy, I'm well. Let me up so I can see about Mr. Potter."

"Harry is fine, Severus. The monitor charm has not gone off so let me check you out properly." Severus knew it was useless to struggle against the Mediwitch and so he sank back down against the pillows with a small curse.

His dark eyes glanced up at the pale face of Poppy. She had become an unexpected friend and ally when he thought he would have none. She had protected him when he had been brought to the Infirmary after the Final Battle. If it hadn't been for her skills and knowledge he was sure that he would be even worse now.

For years she had nursed him back to health whenever he had returned from a Death Eater meeting. She had been there for him in times when nobody else had been. Poppy had been one of the few people he trusted with his life and who didn't shy back from his temper or his quick tongue.

And now, what was supposed to be a peaceful time for her was again proving to be trying. Poppy had all the rights to pick an apprentice and start preparing to retire and yet even now she proved once again that she was a strong witch who didn't care if her day consisted of curing students who had been dueling or spies that returned late at night from a round with the Cruciatus curse.

She treated all of her patients with the same love and kindness and offered a listening ear to those who needed it.

"Severus, if it was not for Harry being so wounded, I would sentence you to bed, young man. You are running yourself into the ground. You are exhausted and you are lucky that your magic isn't showing any strains yet. You need to start taking it a little bit easier, young man."

"I will take it easier once Potter is on his feet..."

"You know that may be a while, dear. It will get harder before it will get better. If I didn't know how short Minerva is on staff members, I would suggest to her that you only focus on your apprentice and let some of the older years help you teach the Defense classes. People like Neville Longbottom, Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley could help you out so you could only teach the NEWT classes."

"Poppy, that may be one of the best ideas you have ever had." Unable to sit still, Severus rose from the bed and began to pace. It was a good idea, it would need Minerva's approval but it would keep his classes covered, keep the students busy, keep annoying Gryffindors out of his hair and he could focus on his own recovery and on Harry's.

He turned back to Poppy and his mind was already miles ahead, plotting and planning. He forced himself to take a deep breath and slow down. The advantages were endless but that also depended if Minerva thought it to be a good idea and if the students agreed.

_Hermione Granger won't be a problem, she would love a challenge like that. Weasley and Draco, perhaps, but I am sure that I can talk them into it. This was a task I had officially hoped to pass onto Harry but that will have to take a back seat. At the moment his recovery is more important __than any apprenticeship. I still have to contact the Guild on the correct protocol on how to continue. And we have to make sure that the public does not get wind of this. If the Daily Prophet or Merlin forbid, Rita Skeeter learns of what happened to their hero, I doubt that even Hogwarts remote location and the wards surrounding the school will be able to hold them off._

At the moment, he had more pressing concerns. "If you are done with me, then I shall return to Harry's bedside. I'm sure that you know where to find me should anything come up from your poking and probing me."

"Severus, I know that you do not wish to see your apprentice in pain but you are aware that it would not help Harry in the long run if you were to give him pain medication now."

Severus had been in Harry's position too many times. He had spent too many nights tossing and turning in pain. He had seen firsthand what addiction did to people, how it destroyed them, His father had been drunk and he had beat his mother daily and gambled away the money that he made.

He had sworn to himself that he would never allow that to happen. He would rather be in pain than to rely on potions to make him comfortable.

"I will not be responsible for having to wean Potter off of Dreamless Sleep atop of all the other things the boy has to deal with. Now, if there was anything else?"

"Yes, do not forget to eat, Severus."

Already on his way, Severus rolled his eyes, his thoughts already on Harry, as they had been for most of the day if he was being honest with himself.

Hp

The interior of the infirmary had always been bright. There was one great hall where most of the beds were and the students were treated who was up to receive visitors. Then there were two private rooms which were slightly darker to make those inside more at ease. This was the home to the critically wounded and those who were suffering from infectious illnesses.

Poppy had her own set of rooms nearby and her office which was situated near the double doors that led to the hospital wing. Severus had spent many nights in the hospital wing during his time at Hogwarts, as both a student and a professor, albeit for different reasons.

And yet he had never been to the private healing rooms quite this many times. In the days after the Final Battle all of the rooms in and around the corridors that led to the hospital wing had been used to treat the wounded before they were send to St. Mungo's. There had been no such thing as private rooms and only the bodies of the dead had their own place somewhere else in the castle so the mourners could visit them and pay their respects.

Severus had not been conscious enough to remember anything about this time except for blinding pain and then blessed darkness. Even now there were flashes of that pain and he knew he had quite a long road of recovery ahead of him.

He had never been one to sit still and allow himself the necessary time to recuperate. He would always keep going, it had been drilled into him from an early age never to show any weakness and even now, he never listened to his body when it told him to slow down.

He closed his eyes, taking a slow breath to try and steady himself and ignore the pounding headache that came from the buzzing bond in his head. Ever since Harry had been wounded it had been buzzing because his apprentice had been in pain. And Severus had been unable to do anything about it.

He sighed softly and shifted slightly on his feet as he cast the disinfection charms upon himself. Once more he would have to be the strong one, once more people would rely on him but this time, and Severus would do everything in his power to help Harry.

He opened his eyes again when the wards gave way and allowed him in. He slowly breathed in and then stepped inside. The lights flared up and his eyes immediately sought out Harry. What he saw scared him more than anything he had seen in the war.

The younger wizard was curled in on himself and his body was shaking. For a moment Severus feared that Harry was having a seizure but then his ears caught the muffled noise of sobs. He stood rooted to the ground, unable to move forward or announce his presence.

He was ruefully out of his debt here. He had no experience with crying children so let alone crying adults. Potter had broken down before and even then Severus hadn't been really comfortable with it. His apprentice had tried his best to hold himself together but this time…

The sobs were deep and painful and they tore at Severus' heart. They were the sobs of somebody who was in pain and who knew no other outlet from his emotions. It unsettled Severus because he had never heard Potter cry like that before, not even when Black died. He had never heard of anybody saying that Potter broke down.

He approached the bed and slowly laid a hand on Harry's back. Harry was lying with his back to the door and the sheets were pooling around his waist. His apprentice startled and immediately Severus could feel Harry's magic push against his hand. He allowed it to wash over him and Potter turned as he whispered. "Sev'rus?"

"I am here, Harry." He sat on the bed. He was not prepared however when Harry immediately rolled over and curled around his thigh. Bandaged hands took a hold of his shirt and refused to let go. Severus couldn't have left if he wanted to and he wasn't quite sure if he did want to.

Hp

If Harry had been capable of purring, he would have done so but instead he reached out with as much magic as possible and curled himself up around Snape. His master dropped a hand against Harry's forehead and softly said. "What has got you into this state?"

"Thirsty and pain…can't find my bracelet…"

Harry wasn't sure if Snape understood what he was saying but the slender hand stroked through his hair. He breathed out slowly, having learned from experience that it would only hurt more if he didn't. His throat was tight with pain and the lump that had formed there because of his tears.

He swallowed thickly, and turned green eyes towards his master, begging for something. He wasn't sure if he was begging for comfort, for company or for anything else.

"_Accio _glass of water." A cool glass was set at his lips as Snape instructed.

"Sip slowly." Harry had always liked water but there must be something special about this water because it was so cold and refreshing that he nearly moaned. His throat fell soothed and he curled his hand around the hand holding the glass steady when Snape sought to pull it away.

"Harry, too much fluid too soon can damage your throat further. You can have more in a while. Are you hungry?"

He shook his head. He wasn't hungry at all. He hadn't been hungry for a while and surely he had been here for days now. How long had it been since the potions accident? The first few nights had blended together and even now he didn't know what day it was.

"Are you tired?"

Again Harry shook his head. He glanced around the room. It was dark but there was a source of light nearby. He couldn't see it very clearly however. Would his vision always be this way?

He had never minded his glasses, really, they had been a part of him and he had never known anything different than having bad vision but this…it was harder and different. His vision was compromised and he wasn't sure if he would get it back.

"Was there anything else you needed?"

"Bracelet…?"

"What about it?" Sure hands tugged the blankets up around Harry and he was tucked in comfortable. He was as exhausted as he had been before but he needed to find his bracelet. If Snape found out that he had lost it, there would be hell to pay. Already his master's opinion of Harry was low and Harry wanted to show he was a responsible young man.

It had been a gift by Snape…well maybe not a gift because it was a means of communication but it had been given to him by his master. And Snape had infused it with his magic and somewhere along the line, Harry wasn't sure where, he had begun to associate Snape with safety. He felt better when it was around his wrist. He knew his master wasn't far away then and whenever Harry had need of him, he could contact Snape.

And now it was gone. Perhaps it had been misplaced because of the commotion of the accident. Or perhaps it had been destroyed in the blast, Harry really hoped it hadn't.

"Can't find it." He carefully sat up. The pain was coming back and he could feel how raw his throat was. He took a deep breath and ended up in a coughing fit. His lungs burned and his eyes watered, all in all, Harry was feeling miserable.

He was exhausted, that was true but he didn't want to go to sleep. He didn't even think he could. Slow fingers ran through his hair and Snape said. "I am sure Poppy has it in her possession. Do you really need it now?"

Harry could hear the underlying tension and irritation in the deep voice and immediately he shook his head. "No, this…fine….forget it…"

"You are aware that you cannot wear it right now. It will have to be disinfected and there are bandages around your wrists due to the burns." Harry just knew that Snape was forcing himself to be patient. Snape never took the time to explain things; he wasn't that kind of person.

Things must be really grim if Snape had the decency to explain everything to Harry. He glanced up towards Snape but he couldn't see much. He could almost picture his master with those dark eyes narrowed in annoyance or anger and the thin lips pressed tightly together to form a line.

He idly wondered if Snape would stay or if he would leave. Perhaps he would stay if Harry asked him to. In all those days that Harry had been in here, Snape had never stayed away once. He would leave and then come back but he had never been away for more than five or six hours.

Harry shivered. It was the first night that he would have to try and sleep without the Dreamless Sleep. He knew he had to force himself to stay calm but still….Snape probably wanted to sleep in his own bed and not be bothered by Harry again.

He yawned. He had learned at an early age never to impose himself on anybody. Probably if he lay there for a while, he could go to sleep. There was no reason why Snape would have to stay with him.

He had spent so many hours and nights alone in his cupboard, even when he had rarely if never felt as bad as he did now but still. He had shouldered it alone and he certainly would do the same now.

"I'm tired…" He mumbled. And as gentle hands tucked him into the bed, Harry pretended to drift off into sleep.

Hp

Noiselessly Severus closed the door behind himself. He glanced around the deserted infirmary before he moved towards the corridor and down to the kitchen. He would eat something quickly and then return to Potter's bedside.

The younger male hadn't fooled him at all with the excuse to pretend to fall asleep but Severus had decided to leave well enough alone and to leave Potter be. He would return later to check up upon his apprentice.

The bond had settled down but Severus knew that soon Potter would be too uncomfortable to do any sleeping. But Severus wondered, would Potter allow him to help?

It would not be the first time that Potter lashed out at him nor would it be the first time that Potter thought he deserved what he got. But this time, this time Severus knew how to deal with it. He was quite sure that Potter would drive him to the edge and probably over it but that didn't mean that Severus would leave Potter again.

The last time he had made that mistake, the younger wizard had thought he was being punished for whatever reason. It was because of Potter's past that he thought that but Severus would show his apprentice that Potter deserved to have somebody take care of him. And not only because of the apprenticeship but also because…well….Severus recognized a lot of himself in Potter if he was really honest.

For years he had refused to see it when somebody pointed it out to him but it had been there. Potter had been abused, as Severus had been. They had both been taught at an early age to fend for themselves. Severus had done so for most of his life, especially when his friendship with Lily ended. He had never allowed anybody else close enough to call them friend and to give them the power to hurt him.

And yet now, the bond he was sharing with Potter bound them closer together than any friends. If Potter hadn't been attacked, Severus was sure that they may even end up as close as lovers. They may even have ended up as lovers.

But that was moot now anyway. Severus would never take advantage of anybody, least of all Potter when the younger male depended on him so. And he wasn't even sure if Potter saw him in such a light. Perhaps to his apprentice, Severus was simply an adult who was there for Potter when others weren't.

Severus forced himself out of his thoughts. It was no use trying to come up with the reasons for the things Potter did or thought. Severus didn't know Potter's thoughts of his reasons behind his actions. He could guess at them but he would never know the truth about them.

It would take time and a lot of trust to figure that out. And as Severus turned around when the bond came to light again, he knew he had plenty of time to build the trust.

Hp

Sleep had never come easy to Harry. He envied people like Ron who could just crawl into bed and fall asleep. In his earliest years it had been fear of the dark and Uncle Vernon that kept him awake. In later years it had been worries about his nightmares and Voldemort. And now the pain kept him awake.

He kept tossing and turning and more than once Harry found himself reaching for to stroke the bracelet to sooth himself, only to remember that it wasn't there. The bed was unfamiliar and too large. The previous nights he had slept curled up to Snape.

Harry knew that once this whole business was done and he could focus his thoughts on other tasks again, he would have to find out why he seemed to like it so much.

Was it because Snape offered safety to him or because it was the first person who had ever touched him in kindness? Snape had stayed with him when he could have easily left and leave Harry alone but the older wizard hadn't done so. He had even promised that he would be back.

Surely it must be the job of a master to make sure his apprentice was comfortable and Snape had said that it wasn't uncommon for master and apprentice to end up as lovers or even spouses. If all masters shared such close quarters with their apprentices and even slept in the same bed, then Harry wasn't surprised. But perhaps it was just Snape who did that but Harry had no way of knowing. His circumstances were unusual at best.

Harry sighed as he rolled onto his back, eyes staring up at the ceiling. He couldn't see it but the darkness offered safety. He could pretend everything was alright even when it was not. He coughed weakly, trying to clear his throat.

It brought with it a pain so bad that Harry's eyes watered. He turned onto his side, curling up around his hands. Everything was hurting him; Harry wasn't even sure what didn't hurt him. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to keep his breathing slow and not work himself up into another coughing episode.

He tried to imagine Snape's hands as they carded through his hair or the way the Potions Master smelled, though it was hard to smell that now. He tried to recall the memory of Snape's magic around him, holding him steady and letting him know that his master was near.

But he wasn't imagining it. The feeling of the magic and the hands that ran through his messy hair were real. His eyes snapped open and Harry didn't even need to see to know that his master was near. His heart soared with the close proximity of Snape but another part of him recoiled.

Snape should be looking after himself. He had been the one who had been wounded and who needed the help. He should be resting and eating properly and not staying near Harry and helped him…even when it was his job as his master.

In the first few days it had been fine because Harry had been unable to fend for himself. Snape had saved him twice. But now Harry didn't have to rely on the potions anymore, surely Snape had better things to do with his time. He could finally get some work done without Harry getting in the way or without having to explain every step to Harry.

He pulled away slightly and Snape's hand froze. Harry could feel the tension in the room deepen and then Snape rumbled. "Is there a problem, Mr. Potter?"

Mutely Harry shook his head. He forced himself to pull away slowly. He didn't need Snape's help. He did remember the last time had tried to tell his master that and how it had backfired into his face so instead he wheezed. "Tis okay….don't need help…You should…do something…else….be somewhere…else…..sir…not be forced…to be here…"

He was out of breath at the end of the sentence. If Harry had been prone to burst of self pity he was quite sure he would have felt really sorry for himself but he didn't want to be a burden. And all his life, whenever he had been ill or wounded, he had been.

Snape's hand stilled before it carefully brushed his forehead. Harry tore himself away from the touch as he said. "No…don't want you here….! You are being forced against your will….I can take care of myself…I don't need you!"

"Shut up!" Harry fell silent with the short gasp of surprise. If he could see properly he would have pulled back in fear by the intensity of the dark eyes but then Snape spoke. The very timbre of the deep and dark voice was pitched low. Snape's face was so close to his own that Harry felt the man's warm breath against his lips.

"Now you listen and you listen well, Mr. Potter, for I am only going to say this once! If you should care to repeat yourself a third time with that utter bullshit that you have been sprouting about being able to fend for yourself, I will hex you so badly that the pain you are feeling at the moment will pale in comparison. I have not been down here for the past week only to be dismissed now because you think that you do not deserve company! I do not know what that family of yours has been teaching you but nobody should suffer on their own and that means you as well, Harry…"

Snape took a deep breath before he continued the hand heavy on Harry's head. His tone was softer. "If I did not want to be here, do you really think I would be investing so much in this? You do not have to bear this burden alone, Harry and while I know that we shall have this conversation a few more times when you are more vocal, I do like to think that you would know me well enough by now that I never do things against my will."

"Spying…" It escaped right out of Harry's mouth and for a long tense moment Harry thought he had done something to upset Snape. He bit his lip but a potion stained finger caressed it as Snape chuckled softly and said.

"Touché, Mr. Potter. Now, if we are done with debating whether or not you actually need the help, perhaps you can scoot over so I can settle in for the night. Some of us do tend to engage in the activity at night known as sleep."

Harry was quite sure that, as he made room for Snape in the bed, his cheeks weren't the only ones feeling hot.

Hp

Severus held himself stiffly as he refused to pay mind to what he had said. It had made it sound as though he was right at home in Potter's bed. _I have only spent most of my nights there in the last week and I must be wearier than I thought when I actually think that I would rather sleep with Potter than alone._

Severus had slept alone for most of his life. If and when he had a lover, he had never allowed them to spend the night. He had never taken them back to his rooms at Hogwarts, believing in being a role model for the students and thus not taking young men back to his chambers. He had always sought pleasure elsewhere, even paid for it if he was honest with himself.

The life of a spy had never been kind to those who believed in love and eternal companionship. To be a spy was to be alone. There were companions for a night, for several nights if one was lucky but a spy always returned home alone.

_But this can change now. __You can take a lover now…you can even get married if you put your mind to it and find somebody you can tolerate for the rest of your life and who can put up with you…_

While it was plausible for Severus to find a steady lover, it was less believable that he would ever settle down to marry. His looks would not attract many suitors and if they were attracted at all, his reputation would scare them away again.

It wasn't all that strange then that he had come to like the feeling of having another in his bed. Or rather being in another's bed. It was the basic human nature to want comfort and to share body heat. Even when Severus tried to deny his basic human nature a lot of times. If he didn't…well let's just say that there would be a lot less students attending Hogwarts.

So what was it about Potter that didn't only make him not seize the chance presented to him to flee but instead come back time and time again? Even the students from his own house had always been left to their own devices once they were in the infirmary and yet…

_He is your apprentice and that makes it another ma__tter. If you do not look out for the boy, who will? You are his master; it is your duty and responsibility to look out for his welfare. And if that means crawling in bed with him, then so be. Besides, many other Masters and Mistresses have taken their apprentices as lovers or even spouses so it is not strange that you should feel compelled to look after Harry, especially when he is incapable of it on his own, no matter how much he may think otherwise._

Harry kept himself stiffly as Severus settled in beside him. Severus knew better then to startle the younger male so instead he laid a careful hand on Harry's arm, allowing the young Gryffindor to make up his mind and to cross the distance between them should he so desire, Severus certainly did.

"Now, do you think that you can sleep or do you need help with that?" He made his tone a little bit more forceful then necessary but still, he could not change all his spots at once. He had already shown remarkable patience throughout the ordeal.

"Hurts too much to sleep…" So finally the kneazle came out of the bag. Severus had been correct in his assumptions. Potter's discomfort prevented him from resting as he was supposed to. He wishes he could give Harry a pain relief potion or even some mild sleeping potion but he knew firsthand the consequences should he give in now.

And Potter had already enough to deal with without being addicted to pain medication or sleep potions to sleep through the night. Severus had been amazed that with all the years Potter had suffered through nightmares, he had never once taken Dreamless Sleep. Instead he had settled for roaming the corridors or putting up silencing spells. That would come to an end as well, Severus decided.

"I wish I could give you something that would help you with the pain, Harry, but I cannot. If you take any more Dreamless sleep you can become addicted to it. And at the moment you have enough recovery to do without having to kick a bad habit."

That seemed to satisfy Harry because some of the tension eased out of his body. "Distract me?" He offered softly. The green eyes were begging for Severus to do anything to help him and as it had been before when he had been influenced by the green eyes, Severus found he couldn't say no.

"And what sort of distraction did you have in mind then? I can read you a story, I can tell you a story or I can…" Well there were a million other things Severus could come up with but they were not appropriate, especially with Potter injured as he was.

As he glanced down at the flushed face and the brilliant green eyes, Severus knew what he would do. If there was one thing that Potter had always lacked, it had been a clear picture of the future. Now while it may not be a pretty picture, Severus could perhaps share some of his plans with Potter concerning the apprenticeship. The other benefit was that he could find out if Potter would object to being moved to his rooms. The idea had merits and Severus smirked as he said.

"I shall tell you about the future." Harry turned to glance up at him as he mouthed the words.

"You have never had a clear picture of your future, which I cannot blame you for. Because how can anyone plan for their future when they may die at the hands of a madman? But surely you have thought about what you wanted to become…"

"An…" Potter's voice broke on the word and Severus waited until the younger wizard found the strength again as he said. "An auror…"

"Ah, yes, that would explain why you continued with potions. The auror program is a good program if that is really what you want to be doing for the rest of your life. I do hope however to impart a healthy sense of distrust against the Ministry before the apprenticeship is over but be aware that there are many things you can do with potions without having to walk straight into the ministry's clutches."

Potter grinned weakly at Severus and heartened by this, Severus offered the other wizard some more water and took a sip himself before he continued.

"Now, every apprentice is different. There are some masters or mistresses, who value knowledge above anything else, then there are those who value practical work or research and then there are those who prepare their apprentices for other fields than potions. My apprenticeship with my Potions Master was a combination of practical work, research and book study. I know that you have never been one to learn through reading books so I had outlined lessons to give you the practical information you needed and you would accompany me on errands and on gathering ingredients."

Severus paused as Potter seemed to grow sad. "Is something the matter?"

"I can't anymore…" Severus frowned in confusion but then Potter continued. "I can't see…..I can't continue…."

"Nonsense! There are Potions Masters that have impaired vision or are blind and they are doing fine. You probably won't be a potion's talent, that is true but you are certainly able to gather ingredients and perhaps even brew with some help. It may take time before you are comfortable again but I know you and you are too stubborn to let something like this defeat you, Potter! You should have died twice and you came back simply to torment me so you shall not let something like this get into the way of what you want to achieve in life! You are better than that!"

Potter blinked at him before he smiled shyly. "Did you just compliment me, sir?"

It was the first sentence that had come out without Potter having to gasp for breath. The younger male was breathless now but his smile was easy and bright. "If you managed to find a compliment somewhere in there, then yes I did. If you can't, then I didn't."

Potter stilled grinned and Severus didn't have the heart to bring the younger male down. So instead he said. "Can I continue or are you fishing for more compliments?"

Potter shook his head, green eyes already focused on Severus' face.

"Very well then, see that you do not interrupt me again. Now as I was saying, I have also outlined lesson plans for you. In time you shall be taking over some of the first year classes from me. Seeing as you defeated a Dark Lord, I'm quite sure that you can hold your own in a class full of students. Even when some of them may be more frightening than Voldemort, it would be good for them to see that not all battles are glorious affairs, as the history books often describe. And since they never listen to me, I think that they may listen to you because you were not so long ago one of their own. You surely do remember the pranks that you have pulled over the years and will know how to deal with them from a different viewpoint. If it isn't clear what class I am talking about, it is defense. You shall not set one foot in the potions classroom whenever Slughorn is there."

"It's not his fault…"

"Excuse me, Potter? I do not believe I heard that right."

"I said that it isn't his fault….Somebody else attacked me…"

"Dennis Creevey attacked you, Harry and Slughorn was his tutor and thus his responsibility! Slughorn was the resident teacher and he should have acted upon his gut instinct but as usual he was too much of a coward to do so! I shall not forgive him for this and I will make sure that he does not come within three feet of you. He almost used you as a test case for experimental potions. Who knew what they could have done to you? Do you honestly wish to forgive him for that?"

The green eyes were wide as they stared into Severus' face. Potter softly stuttered. "Dennis did…? But why?"

"He held you responsible for his brother's death…"

"So I was right…I do deserve this…."

Severus felt rage take over him as he rarely felt. It took effort not to lean over and shake Potter but he restrained himself. Instead he growled and said. "Have you ordered Mr. Creevey to fight for you?"

"No."

"Have you cast the curse that ended his life?"

"No…"

"Are you in any way, shape or form responsible for _actually _killing Mr. Creevey?"

"No…"

"Then you are not responsible for his death, Harry. He chose to fight, as did all the others and they knew the cost. You could not have prevented them from fighting if that is what they wanted and it is not fair to beat yourself up over it. You have never killed anybody in your life, even when you fought the Dark Lord you did not utter the killing curse. You are not responsible for all those deaths, Harry and you do not deserve what has happened to you. They were the actions of somebody who was blind with grief and who struck out at somebody he thought was responsible but he had no right to hurt you for you have not hurt anybody other than in self protection."

Severus had known Harry for a while now and yet he was still surprised when the younger male launched himself at Severus. He caught Potter against his chest and as the younger male did his best not to dissolve in tears, Severus held him tightly and allowed the young wizard to relax and take comfort from him.

Hp

Harry did his best not to cry but some tears did slip out. He nuzzled against Snape's throat, breathing out slowly as the arms tightened around him. He could feel the magic wrap around him and he relaxed completely.

It was strange that he wasn't even feeling so bad now as he had done before. He still ached but it was lessening as his exhaustion took over. He curled up around his master, feeling Snape shift them into a more comfortable position.

Harry yawned.

"Finally managed to wear you out, now did I?"

Harry glanced up. The dark eyes were close to his own face but this time they weren't blazing with anger or malice. Harry found himself drawn to the intense gaze. _He really has nice eyes, especially when he isn't scowling or something like that…_

Yet Harry knew he would never say that. He wanted to say something and actually opened his mouth to but he yawned again. One fine dark eyebrow rose and Harry flushed lightly.

"Glad to see that the color in your cheeks isn't from burn marks this time but from blushing." The deep voice soothed Harry further as did the hand that carded through his hair. Closing his eyes, Harry allowed himself to drift.

He was quite sure that he was dreaming as Snape whispered. "When you are allowed out of the Infirmary you will move into my quarters and I will show you what a true apprenticeship means." He must have been dreaming because why would Snape want him in his quarters but still, Harry couldn't help but feel a thrill of excitement because perhaps, he could find a place to call home for a little while.

**I hope you liked it. Review please and send some ideas. **

**In the next chapter: Severus contacts the Guild to figure out to do about Harry's problem. Can the Guild come up with a suitable answer or will Severus be forced to give up the apprenticeship? And how will Harry feel when he has to move into Snape's quarters and spends a lot of time up close and person with Snape? Will they fight or will they grow closer as a true master and apprentice? And Harry will have to rely on his sight again? Will he have recovered enough or will he suffer a relapse? That and more in: A new phase. **


	19. A New Phase

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter.**

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. I seem to have some more time on my hands for writing ****so let's begin.**

Severus took a sip of his tea and tried to hide his grimace. He would have preferred coffee but Minerva always served tea. He glanced down at his cup and then Banished the milky tea. She should have known that he preferred his tea as black as night if she did not wish to serve coffee.

He needed something to keep him awake. During the school year he always had one cup of coffee each morning to wake him up. It may not have been the healthiest of habits but it was one of the few that Severus indulged in.

He glanced around the office. Minerva was not here at the moment. She had requested his presence when he had exited the Hospital wing on the way to his rooms for a much needed shower. He had spent the night in Harry's bed again. If it had not been to make his apprentice sleep easier, Severus would have wondered what he was doing.

He ran a hand through his long hair before pulling it away from his face. He had composed a letter to the Guild and sent it off with a school owl before he came back to the Headmistress' office. He needed advice on the next step.

What could he teach Potter now that the boy was nearly effectively blind? There were blind Potions Masters but Severus knew nothing about them or the way they worked. Perhaps Harry, if he was still interested in persuading this apprenticeship, would be better of studying under another Potions Master once the year was up.

Severus had always been keen to brand out his own research. Perhaps he could collaborate with another Master and take Potter on for another year. It would take him away from Hogwarts and most likely Brittan but he had no problem with that.

It had always been a wish of his to visit Rome and see where the Guild was located first hand. It was the first time in his life that he had the time for such daydreams. Daydreams that might actually become reality.

"Ah, Severus, how good of you to arrive so early. You did not wish to visit the Great Hall for breakfast this morning?"

Severus tried not to show how startled he was as Minerva appeared. By the twinkle in her eyes he could tell he had not been as successful as he had hoped. He straightened as Minerva continued. "Shall I order some breakfast for you?"

He wanted to decline but his stomach rumbled. Crossing his arms over his chest he merely contented himself with a nod. Minerva smirked. Minerva summoned a house elf and after one glance at Severus, which he returned, ordered coffee as well.

Trying to hide his smirk, Severus watched as Minerva sat herself behind the enormous desk. Most of the portraits were sleeping and Albus was absent. Severus relaxed. He had no desire to speak to Albus at the moment.

"Severus, I know that you have told me that you wish for Harry to be moved to your quarters when he is deemed ready to be released from the Infirmary, but are you sure that there aren't adjustments to be made to the air quality and purity in your rooms and other things? Such as move the furniture around if Harry wants to start walking so he won't bump into anything?"

"Yes, those adjustments have to be made. It is quite easy for Poppy to set up the ventilation system already placed in my rooms to vent in clean and purified air for Potter and to have it changed regularly. I will make sure to cast disinfection charms upon everything that is in my rooms so there will be a minimum chance of infection for Potter's sake."

"Good…" Minerva played with her quill for a moment before she continued. "…Have you thought about what you want to do with the apprenticeship for the moment?"

Severus paused as the breakfast Minerva had ordered appeared on the table. There was bacon and eggs and toast. Taking a moment to take a bite of toast, Severus chewed as he gathered his thoughts. It could take days for the Guild to respond to his message so in the meantime he would have to organize his own thoughts.

Would he be able to give Potter the care the younger wizard so obviously needed? Severus himself was far from well so could he trust himself not to harm his apprentice further as he lashed out in a moment of anger. It would not do. Potter was vulnerable and Severus was not in the best condition to juggle classes, the apprenticeship and Potter's care while he looked after his own needs.

"I have sent a letter to the Guild and I am awaiting advice and perhaps instructions. I wish to see the apprenticeship through, despite what may happen. I made a vow and I intend to hold myself to that. It will only confirm Potter's believe that he is a burden when he is shipped to somebody else. I would however, request help with my classes. I cannot teach all of my classes and look after Potter at the same time…"

"Poppy finally got to you, did she?" Severus fought the snarl that was threatening to rise to the surface. It wouldn't do to insult Minerva so he fought it back. She had done a lot for him over the years and he could not afford to lose what little friends he had managed to keep.

He merely sighed and took another bite of toast.

"Very well then, you impossible man, what was your idea?"

"That Mr Weasley, Miss Granger and Mr Malfoy and perhaps Neville Longbottom and anybody who is interested to take over my first to fourth year classes and perhaps even the grade work when it is supervised by me. I had planned for Harry to teach those classes with me but that is out of the question at the moment. I need help, Minerva….You know that I do not like to admit this and it better not carry further than this room but I am weary. Poppy was right, I need to take a step back if I do not want to hinder my own recovery."

Minerva cast him a sharp look and poured him another cup of coffee before she said.

"I'm glad that you see the wisdom in her words, Severus. It takes the pressure off me to order you to take it easy. If you can make me a list of all the students you think would make good teaching assistance I shall contact them."

Severus nodded as he took a sip of his coffee and finished his eggs. He was still hungry and he leaned forward to grab a piece of toast. Minerva merely watched with a smirk like a cat that got the cream. She glanced away and seemed to grow sombre as she said.

"I saw the report from the Aurors that Dennis testified on what ingredients he used. He switched the mermaid tears with unicorn tears. It wasn't a spur of the moment decision, Severus, it was planned. He knew Harry would be assigned that potion on that day and made sure that Harry was the only one who would get hurt. It was a cold blooded attack and he was lucky that nobody else got hurt in the explosion."

Severus was not amazed by the ingenious of the attack. Dennis Creevey had always been smart. He finished chewing before he spoke. "The Wizengamot will take over his trial, I presume. He's lucky if he can escape the Kiss for hurting the darling of the wizarding world."

"You don't think he deserves that?" Minerva's eyes narrowed.

"No, Minerva, I think he deserves to rot in Azkaban for what he has done. Being Kissed will be a light punishment. His true self will be gone as will his memories, what other things will he have left to remember what he has done? He should spend the rest of his life in that cursed place and be forced to live his most horrible memories over and over again."

"You plan to testify against him then?" Minerva poured herself a cup of tea as Severus finished his toast. He finally pushed his plate away, the eggs only half eaten. He had lost his appetite.

"I do not plan to do anything! I have my hands full with Harry. I do not have the time to testify against Dennis. Why don't you get Horace to testify? He's Creevey's tutor after all." Severus took a sip of his coffee.

He searched the bond but at the moment it was quiet. Harry was most likely still asleep as he was when Severus had left him this morning. It was good to see that Potter got some rest. The night had been uneventful but restless and Severus had woken quite a bit.

"I will see to it that Horace does his duty." Minerva's lips were pressed together and Severus could almost hear what was coming next. "Are you sure that you do not wish for his help with any potions that may aid Harry's recovery?"

"Yes, I am sure. His student attacked my apprentice. I do not plan to let him within three feet of Potter. His potions are trial based and have only been tested on animals. I do not plan to let Harry Potter be the first human test subject. What if they kill him? Not only will Potter be dead but my career will be over because I allowed the great Harry Potter to be killed when he was my responsibility as my apprentice."

"Alright, Severus, you have made your point. Now, have you asked Harry yet if he wishes to be relocated to your rooms? On another note, have you even discussed this possibility with Poppy?"

"I have done neither. I have told Potter that it was a plan but I have not asked him for his consent yet. He has been drugged until a day ago, Minerva and now he is in a great deal of pain. I cannot ask him to make this kind of decision but it has to be made soon. I will simply take it out of his hands. Apprentices used to share close quarters with their masters so it would not look strange."

"No and their bonds are also very close. I remember my master fondly…" Minerva got a slightly dreamy look on her face that was slightly disconcerting.

"I'm sure…" Severus merely said. The Headmistress merely glared at him before she said with a smirk.

"I cannot wait to see when you _fully _bond with your apprentice according to the master/apprenticeship rules, Severus."

Severus choked upon his tea but if he was truthful with himself, a part of him couldn't wait either.

Hp

"Well, Harry, let's see how you are doing this morning?" Blinking awake, Harry pulled his blankets over his head. He had been having a good dream and it was way too early to be awakened so cheerfully.

Ignoring Madam Pomfrey as she bustled about the room, Harry pretended to be asleep. He wanted to go back to his dream and pretend that Snape was sharing his bed. He kept his eyes tightly closed and reached out with his magic. It only brushed Madam Pomfrey's. Harry sighed.

He reacted when he felt her hand on his shoulder and he emerged from the blankets. He blinked up at her, moving slowly. He felt a little bit better but he was still so tired. Perhaps he could sleep a bit later. He coughed weakly and wordlessly a glass of water was held at his lips. Harry sipped it slowly and then pushed it away when he had enough.

"So did you sleep well? I believe that I saw Severus leaving the room earlier."

Harry merely nodded and relaxed back against the pillow as Madam Pomfrey's spells washed over him. He yawned, earning himself a chuckle as Poppy said.

"Your throat and lungs are slowly healing. It should soon get easier to breathe, Harry and it will hurt less. Do you perhaps want to wash today? I can charm the room to do that if you would like even when you can't use soap or shampoo. I'm available for help or perhaps Severus or one of your friends?"

_I wonder if Severus would help me if I needed help __showering. I doubt that would be one of those things I would never ask him. I would be afraid that he will hex me. But perhaps it is something that masters have to do, bath their apprentices when they are unable to fend for themselves. Though to be fair, I couldn't stand it if Hermione were to bathe me. There are just some things a friend doesn't have to do. Perhaps Ron would do it but still…it would be weird…_

Out loud he whispered. "A bath would be nice…but it would be weird not use any soap…."

"I agree. A _scourgify _can only do so much. Now, I would like the change the bandages on your hands, Harry and then we have to talk about possibly moving you to another location. I know that you are far from recovered and just because I am condoning this move, does not mean that you should be out and about, because you have not recovered enough just to be awake a few hours of the day and possible to receive some visitors. But the students are starting to piece together what has happened and will soon demand to see you. And if not the students then it will be the Ministry and I cannot condone that. You need rest. I think that Professor Snape has already told you that he wants you to move into his rooms?"

Madam Pomfrey pulled up a chair by the sound of it and Harry nodded. Snape had mentioned it even when he hadn't officially invited or ordered Harry to move yet. He glanced in her direction. The room must have been lightened magically but Harry couldn't see it.

He merely waited for the Mediwitch to speak but instead she took his hands in hers, carefully unravelling the bandages with skilled hands. Harry bit his lip to keep from flinching. Madam Pomfrey was tender and gentle but the sensitive skin hurt as the bandages were peeled away.

Madam Pomfrey wordlessly summoned something and Harry pushed out his magic when he felt an object sailing passed. It brushed Madam Pomfrey who tightened her grip upon Harry's wrist in surprise.

"Harry, have you always been able to do that or is that just something that you recently learned?"

"To push my magic out…." His voice was soon giving out and Harry licked dry and cracked lips. Wordlessly Madam Pomfrey put the glass of water to his lips and Harry took grateful sips, careful not to drink too quickly.

"Yes, that is what I mean."

"Always could….there was just no need to…." Speaking began to hurt and Harry swallowed thickly. His throat was starting to ache again and Madam Pomfrey hummed as she carefully washed Harry's hands with a wet cloth. Harry gasped at the sensation.

It didn't hurt at all but it felt wonderfully soothing. Next his hands were patted dry with a towel before Madam Pomfrey applied some cream as she said.

"Your hands are healing well. Better than your throat and your lungs. I will bandage them again so the skin can heal. The cream I applied is an Anti-burn paste that Severus made. It works wonders and it will make you feel better. Now do you want some breakfast or shall I leave you to rest? I expect that Severus will soon come down. He never leaves more than a few hours at the most, even when he also should be taking it easy and resting and not running up and down staircases."

Harry could almost imagine the way her lips would be pressed together in disapproval. He flushed a bit. If it hadn't been for him then Snape would be taking it easier, though probably not that much. Snape had never been the kind of person who seemed to be one to take it easy and to rest.

_I wonder how I would have managed to make Snape take it __easy. I can hardly bind him to the bed…he may take it otherwise and…._

Harry tried not to flush as the unexpected thought provoked a feeling he hadn't had in a long time, a feeling of arousal. Why was the thought of spending more time with his master so alluring? Was it because Snape was taking care of him by being there for Harry and giving him attention? Harry didn't know.

He just knew that he wanted to learn more about Snape and to get to know the man his master was. Snape had been a consistent in the past months. Snape brooked no argument or excuses from Harry and it was a first.

Perhaps eventually they would reach the state where Snape could become Harry's confidante and Snape would learn to trust Harry and show Harry some insight in the man he truly was instead of the mask everybody got to see. It would take time, Harry knew but despite everything else, he had time, and he vowed to not only make it about his recovery but also seize the chance to get to know Snape and to show his master he could be trusted with Snape's secrets.

HP

The owl that was waiting in his office was a regal looking one. The brown eyes regarded him intelligently as Severus entered his office. The owl hooted softly and shuffled the black and white speckled feathers before sticking out his leg so Severus could retrieve the scroll attached to it.

He closed the door to his office and approached the owl. It wasn't the school owl he had sent this morning, it would be too soon. Surely the Guild couldn't answer this quickly. It would take the owl at least a day to go to Rome, unless the owls had a different magic that made them travel quicker and unable to tire as quickly as other birds.

He held out his hand to untie the scroll and frowned at the seal. It was from the Guild. He glanced up sharply at the owl and asked. "Are you awaiting a reply?"

The owl merely blinked at him before it nipped affectionately at his finger. Severus reached up a hand to stroke the head carefully as he said. "Careful or I will use you as an ingredient. I doubt that they will miss you."

_Unless they anticipated a letter, the Guild is very fast. I only send the letter with my inquiry this morning and there is no way that the owl has already arrived in Rome, it may take a day or more depending on the weather over the Chanel and the Alps._

He searched his drawers for the owl treats he usually kept there. The owl flew to land on his chair and regarded him. It didn't take long for Severus to find the treats and he fed the owl one. Instead of flying to the Owl Wing as he would have thought the owl would, the owl began to preen itself. Severus conjured a bowl of water and set it on his desk, charming his papers that he had lying on his desk to prevent them from getting wet or dirty because of the owl.

He broke the seal and opened the letter. His eyes quickly scanned it. The note was longer than he anticipated and yet it answered all his questions.

Slowly he sat down in the chair that stood in front of his desk and glanced at the letter in his lap.

_According to the Guild there are __Potions Masters that are either blind or have impaired vision. They have included ways for me to contact them. Perhaps it would be wise to send some letters asking for advice on how to deal with an apprentice that has lost his vision._

"In regards to the setback that has been suffered by your apprentice because of the time that is needed to recover, this poses no problem. The apprenticeship can be extended until the apprentice is deemed ready by the master to be released. If however, Professor Snape, you feel strongly about being unable to continue as in regards with the apprenticeship, the Guild urges you to reconsider. There is a mentor for you at the Guild who can monitor the apprenticeship should you wish it so and one who can offer advice. An apprenticeship, as you are well aware, is a matter of trust between the master and the apprentice. I think that at this moment it would be at a disadvantage to the trust between you and your apprentice to have somebody take over the apprenticeship at this moment. Your suggestion to work closely with another master who has experience with working with blind or vision impaired apprentices is a good one. This is just the initial letter and we shall be in touch as soon as we have had the time to consult on which advice would be best in your unique situation. Do not give up on yourself or your apprentice."

Severus' voice faded as he finished the letter. The last part added to his resolve. He found himself smiling before he strode from his office. He had to make an important offer to his apprentice.

Hp

Harry woke with a start as he shot up in the bed. He hadn't been dreaming, he knew that much but he didn't know what had awoken him. He gazed around the room blindly before a hand touched his own and somebody softly said.

"Go back to sleep. It is just me." Snape's voice was soft and Harry relaxed against the pillow. Snape appeared to be sitting in the same chair Madam Pomfrey had used earlier and Harry waited a moment. Snape's hand didn't leave his own and Harry allowed his magic to brush Snape's hand.

"I take it that you are not going to sleep?"

"Not sleepy…"

"Ah yes, Poppy said that you would be more active today, though you still tire more easily. Well might as well make use of this moment to talk some things over. I may have told you that when you are allowed out of the Infirmary that you shall be moving into my quarters?"

Harry gave a nod. So it hadn't been a dream then.

"If you have any objections to that, then you can say so now, so that we can make other arrangements." Snape paused but Harry shook his head.

"No…objections….." He coughed a little on the last word.

"Very well then. I have written to the Guild this morning to ask for advice on how to proceed with the apprenticeship and to see what the correct protocol was when an apprentice was injured and would take time to recover. They were very quick in their response. Would you care to know what they have written?"

Harry tried not to show how nervous he was feeling suddenly. Surely Snape would get rid of him now. The older wizard hadn't wanted to take him on in the first place and now he was once again an unwanted burden. It was merely a formality and…

"They gave me contact details on various Potions Masters who have worked with apprentices who have impaired vision and they will take a look at the apprenticeship document that Minerva had written up to see if there are any specifics that we need to change to accommodate for your injuries and what I shall be teaching you. The guild also urged me not to give up on you and to make due for the moment on what I think is best. My personal opinion is to agree with them even when they have come to the same conclusion that I had originally. Therefore we shall continue the apprenticeship but for the moment we shall focus on getting you back on your feet slowly."

Harry's tension left him suddenly and he glanced up at Snape. The Potions Master was watching him; Harry could almost feel the weight of Snape's stare on his face.

He couldn't even begin to describe what it would mean to him. For years when he had lived with the Dursleys he had to fend for himself when he had been injured. He had spent most of his time in his cupboard whenever he had fallen ill or had been wounded. Even Madam Pomfrey usually left him alone when he was wounded? Could he really spend most of his time with Snape?

_I don't have much of a choice. I'm no good this way. I can't fend for myself. I can't even get out of bed without falling over and I can't see a thing. Besides, Snape is my master and he has always protected me, even when he hated me. It will take some getting used to but the past few days have been nice when he has been there for me. I think that this may be alright._

"Can I be…discharged then?"

"Perhaps we should ask Poppy?" Snape rose in a rustle of clothes and light footsteps. He didn't leave the room but a bright light filled it and it had Harry blinking.

"Patronus?" He asked. That had him thinking about his wand. Surely it must be safe. He had it on him during the class, before the explosion.

"Yes, you can see it." The deep voice was a comfort to Harry but he shook his head.

"Just the light."

"That is better than expected, Harry. Now, we shall wait for Poppy to get here before discussing the next step. Perhaps she knows where your bracelet is."

"My wand?" That was at the moment the more pressing concern. He had never allowed it out of his sight, even when it had been broken last year he had kept it close to his heart. He knew how dangerous it was to be without a wand.

"Ah yes, natural that you should ask that. It was undamaged in the blast, probably because you had it in your pocket and not in your hand or on the desk. It is in my possession. I can give it back to you if it makes you feel safer though I doubt that you would be able to use it. I shall give it back when you are discharged."

Harry nodded. It would be nice to have his wand back. Perhaps that was the reason his magic hadn't been working lately. He could do wandless magic but it had never been one of his strongest suits. Usually these things happened accidentally and spontaneously.

"Magic will be fine then?" He had to know. He couldn't handle it if his magic had gone funny as well.

Snape's hand came to rest upon his as the Professor leaned in and he asked. "Are you having trouble with your magic, Harry?"

He shook his head sharply as he said. "No, just tried to summon something and it wouldn't work..."

"What did you try to summon?"

"Bracelet."

"It could be that it was too far away but we shall try again soon to test that your magic is alight. It certainly is strong enough if you keep brushing it up against me. "There was something in Snape's tone of voice Harry couldn't decipher. He glanced up at the older wizard and narrowed his eyes.

If only he could see Snape. Those dark eyes of his revealed a lot when Snape wanted to. Usually when Harry was concerned Snape could not always hide what he was feeling. The older wizard also showed signs when he was angry in little things he could not control, such as the twitching of muscles or fingers.

Harry could feel Snape's magic brush his own. In the past few days it had become a comfort to him to have Snape so nearby. Who would have thought that Snape would be somebody Harry would feel comfortable with?

Harry glanced up sharply as Madam Pomfrey came in.

"Severus, you summoned me?" Her tone betrayed nothing and Harry blinked up at her.

"Yes, I did. Mr Potter graciously accepted my offer of allowing him to stay in my rooms when he is well enough to be discharged. I wanted to know when that moment is."

Madam Pomfrey glanced at Harry before she said. "He has improved; Severus and he can be moved soon. I take it that you have made all the adjustments to your rooms."

"Yes, the charms to purify the air have been set up and the rooms have been disinfected and cleaned thoroughly. It is as ready as it will ever be for Potter. "Harry frowned. That had been quick by Snape.

"It would be better to move him now than later today. I already had to turn away a couple of students who wished to see Mr Potter. I do not know how long I can keep them away. It won't do to have them try to come in barge in here and undo all the hard work we have accomplished. Are you alright with being moved today, Harry?"

He merely nodded. His throat was beginning to ache again and he really didn't fancy having to answer now.

"Very well then. How shall we do this?"

"It would be best if you could Apparate there. I asked Minerva to dispel the Anti Appiration wards around the Infirmary and your quarters. It would be the easiest and the less invasive for Harry. Now if you would get Harry then I shall precede us. If you don't mind me going into your quarters before you."

"No, Poppy, as long as it is just a onetime occurrence."

"I would not dream of coming in another time without your permission. Now shall we go?"

Harry wasn't entirely sure what was happening but as gentle hands lifted him, he allowed himself to be carried off to a new destination.

Hp

Severus tried not to sway with the weight of Harry when they Apparated into the room. Harry may not have been that heavy but he was heavier than Severus anticipated. He was wearier then he thought at first.

"Do you think you can stand?" There was a nod against his throat where Harry had buried his face when they Apparated. He could feel the hot puffs of breath against the tender flesh of his throat as Harry sought to catch his breath. Harry was wheezing.

The green eyes blinked up at him as Harry nodded slowly. Carefully Severus set him down, holding him by an arm around the waist. It wouldn't do to have Harry falling over.

Harry's hand was resting on his shoulder as he kept his balance. The messy hair was even messier than usual and Harry's forehead was sweaty. The small trip had already exhausted him. Severus led Harry to the couch.

They nearly stumbled twice but Poppy's interference saved them. Severus collapsed in a chair opposite the couch. He would carry Potter to the bedchamber later; he just needed a moment to catch his breath. A house elf brought tea and Severus took a grateful sip, just the way he liked it.

He closed his eyes for a moment before he glanced over at Potter. The younger male was sitting up straight and blinked at the light of the fireplace. It showed how pale and weary Potter looked. Severus' heart clenched expectantly. Potter shouldn't have to suffer like this.

"Severus, do you require any more aid? I will come by to check upon you two tomorrow. If there is anything you need, don't hesitate to call for me."

Severus wasn't the only one who nodded as he saw Potter doing the same thing out of the corner of his eye. Within a moment they were alone. Severus sighed in relief. Poppy was a good woman and she meant well but sometimes here presence grated on his nerves.

He finished his tea and poured himself another one before grabbing a biscuit. He noticed Potter perking up at the scent of tea. The green eyes glanced hopefully in the general direction of the table and Harry sat up straighter.

_The boy has been living on potions and water for the past couple of days. Of course he wants something else to drink. Poppy didn't say it wasn't allowed to give him some weak tea. It will make him feel better._

It certainly didn't hurt to ask and Severus softly said, draining his second cup. "Would you care for some tea, Harry?"

Those gorgeous green eyes rose up to meet his own and Harry smiled a little as he whispered. "Thank you, sir…that would be nice…"

Severus poured a cup of the tea that stood there. It was kept under a warming charm and he cast a cooling charm on it to cool it off a little. He didn't want Harry to burn his mouth.

He slowly got up and approached the couch, settling down beside Harry. The younger male turned to him.

"It is weak tea. There is no sugar or milk in it. It may not taste good but it is the only thing besides water I can give you. We have to wait for your throat to heal a bit more." Harry nodded eagerly. He licked his lips.

Slowly placing the cup against Harry's lips, Severus tilted it so Harry could take a sip. Up this close he could examine Harry's face. The skin was beginning to blister and the green eyes were cast down. Severus was unsure if something of the scarring could be seen that impaired Harry's vision. Probably not but it was a real shame for Harry.

Harry drank greedily and Severus had to take the cup away as he said. "Slowly."

It came out sharper then he meant to but Harry merely whispered. "Sorry, I'm thirsty."

That was no surprise. His body had to work hard to try and heal itself. Severus would not find it strange if Harry demanded a sandwich next. Poppy had given Harry nutritious potions that would help keep his strength up.

He poured another cup of tea and this time told Harry to sip it slowly. Harry pulled away when the cup was half full and sighed softly. Severus waited a moment to see if Harry merely wanted a break but when he realized Harry was resting his head against his shoulder he sat the cup down.

He glanced down at the messy head that was buried against his shoulder. Harry's eyes were closed and his breathing was slow. Slowly running a hand down Harry's back, Severus was pleased to see that Harry wasn't asleep yet.

"I think it may be time for bed." Harry gave him a slow nod and as the younger Gryffindor didn't argue with him, Severus knew how exhausted he was and while he hoped that it would mean Harry would sleep through the night and on his own, a part of his couldn't help but hope that Harry would chose his bed again tonight.

Hp

Everything was silent when Harry woke up. He lay still for a moment and listened. There was no sound except for his harsh breaths. His throat and lungs seemed to be on fire but he tried to keep his breathing slow.

He remembered that Snape had put a glass of water on his bedside table and said that Harry only had to call for him. But that was the point; Harry could barely speak, so how could he call out? He turned on his other side but after a few moments turned back.

His throat and chest hurt too much to go back to sleep. It was parched dry and he had already drained the glass of water. He was hot and the fire in the room had burned low but he knew he couldn't go back to sleep.

He didn't want to wake Snape. The older wizard needed his rest so he could keep his strength up.

After some more tossing and turning he rose from the bed. His feet touched the cold stones and he walked towards the living room. The fire burned even lower there but Harry could feel himself breathing a bit easier.

He went towards the couch. Perhaps he could sit here for a while and then try and go back to sleep. Even the short trip from his room to the couch had exhausted him and Harry sank down against the cushions gratefully. He glanced around the room.

Snape's door was a little ajar and Harry felt a pang of something in his chest. Couldn't he simply pretend that he was in distress so he could share Snape's bed? But that was ridiculous. Snape deserved to have a full night sleep and not be burdened by Harry.

Closing his eyes, Harry curled up on the couch. This was also nice. He sighed. His throat was still hurting and Harry tried not to cough. There would be a chance that he would wake Snape and he didn't want to do that.

He had just closed his eyes and relaxed, preparing to go back to sleep when the door was suddenly thrown open and Snape stood there. Harry startled as he glanced up. He couldn't see what Snape was wearing but it wasn't a grey nightshirt, it seemed something black but in the dying light of the fire Harry couldn't be certain.

He flinched when Snape snarled. "Tell me. Mr Potter, why you insist on sleeping out here when there is a perfectly good bed in the other room?"

Harry swallowed thickly. What was he going to tell Snape? He could hardly tell Snape that he didn't want to sleep alone. He sat up and instead said. "Couldn't sleep so wanted to walk around….fell asleep on the couch."

Snape crossed the distance between them before the Potions Master bared his teeth in a growl as he said. "You always were a bad liar, Potter and you know how I feel about lying."

"I'm not lying!" Harry protested. Anger and hurt were making him incoherent but he rose from his seat and stood his ground against Snape as he hissed. "I'm not some helpless kitten that needs looking after. I can take care of myself; I have been doing so all my life."

"Potter, you aren't well! You need aid, now stop arguing and get back into bed."

"You don't need to mollycoddle me! I can take care of myself…" Harry coughed a little. Snape raised an eyebrow.

"Potter, you can barely speak without breaking into coughs! Do not tell me that you are well. Now stop being stubborn and go to bed."

"No, don't need to…I'm not tired…"

"Potter…" Snape sounded annoyed and Harry snapped.

"You aren't my parent! I can take care of myself! Leave me alone…"

"No, I'm only your master and in case it escaped your notice, I am not at the top of my game as well, you ungrateful little brat!" Snape growled at him and Harry could feel something in him hardening. So it had been duty all along, well Snape could stop worrying.

"Don't worry, _master_, I will be out of your hair soon." He sneered and turned to walk away, coughing weakly.

"If you dare to walk away now, Potter, so Merlin help me, I will Accio you back!" Snape's voice dropped dangerously and Harry growled.

"You wouldn't dare."

"You want to bet." Snape's voice was pure silk pulled over a knife and Harry shivered. His breathing escaped him and he said.

"No!" The word was a drawn out breath as he began to cough. They were deep wrecking coughs and dark spots began to appear in his vision. The next moment a hand touched his back and somebody pulled him to the couch.

"A deep breath, that's it, Potter…" The coughs subsided and Snape asked. "Now what is the matter?"

Harry tried to catch his breath but it took a few more tries and even then he had to wheeze through the next sentence. "I couldn't sleep anymore….I wanted to get a glass of water but….it was cooler here than in my bedroom. My throat hurt and my lungs…..everything hurt….."

The coughs kept coming faster and faster and Harry couldn't seem to catch his breath. He bent over as he wrapped an arm around his chest.

"Potter, we haven't nursed you back to health only to have you expire during a rant. Sit up straight."

He tried but it hurt too much. He slowly straightened up, trying to breathe deeply. The next moment there was one hand on his chest and the other hand came to rest on his back and Snape said. "Place your hand on my chest…"

He waited until Harry had obeyed him. Harry could feel the steady beat of Snape's heart against his palm and then the man softly said. "Breath in…and breath out…"

It took Harry a moment to find the rhythm but eventually he found it. He slumped forward but Snape held him up and gently eased him back against the pillows. He breathed out slowly. Tears of frustration were standing in his eyes and he tried to blink them away.

A glass of water was held at his lips and Harry took a grateful sip. He glanced up at Snape even when he was still wheezing for breath. The older wizard was staring down at him. For perhaps the first time ever Harry wanted to give into the tears and cry. He swallowed past the lump.

Snape's hand stroked down his chest as the older wizard remarked. "Crying will not help your breathing."

Harry nodded. He glanced down, balling his fists as he tried to keep the tears down. To know that Snape hated seeing his tears was nearly enough to try and keep them in. But he was frustrated with himself. He had been so good today, had rested when they told him to rest, trying to keep as still as possible and one small walk through the room and a conversation and he was short of breath.

Would it ever ease up? He couldn't cope if this was all his life had become. He wanted to run, to fly again and to do all other things other people his age did. He wanted to find somebody and fall in love and while Harry knew that it may take a while for him, surely it wasn't too much to ask to give him some reprieve.

"I hate being weak." He whispered. Snape exhaled sharply through his nose before he hissed as Harry met his gaze, black eyes spitting fire.

"You aren't weak, Potter!"

"I am! I cannot even form a sentence without wheezing or coughing…" To demonstrate Harry coughed again. "How can I learn potions or fly again? I can't even walk a little without being out of breath…."

Snape sighed and then turned back to Harry as he said. "Harry, that isn't a sign of weakness! You have been seriously injured and it will take time before you can build your strength up again. I know that it may be a lot to ask of you but within time you will feel better."

"But you don't know…..if I will….recovered fully…."

"No, we do not know that for certain but you have a way to go yet. You were injured only days ago, Harry. You are strong and you are young and you _will_ recover." It was almost a command and Harry was taken aback by the passion in Snape's voice.

He merely nodded and gazed towards the fireplace. Snape shifted on the couch and Harry realized with a pang that his hand was still resting on his master's chest. He carefully removed it, drawing Snape's attention to him.

Snape cleared his throat and said. "Perhaps we should go back to sleep. I would like to spend a few more hours in a normal night activity."

_Of course we will go back to bed. What else would we be doing?_

Harry didn't want to go back to bed. He didn't want to go back to the empty room and pretend to go back to sleep, only to toss and turn. In the past few days Snape had always been by his side during the night. Could he really ask his master to share a room with him? It was worth a try.

"Sir…can I sleep with you?"

Hp

Severus had to blink at the unexpected question. He turned back to Potter. The green eyes were watching him, waiting for rejection and Severus asked.

"Your room is not to your satisfaction?"

Potter flushed and said. "I feel alone… I can sleep on a cot on the floor…."

"Potter, if you do wish to sleep in the same room, I'll not have you sleep on a cot on the floor on a chair. You will sleep in a bed. _My bed_. And it isn't strange that you do not wish to sleep alone. You have not done so many times in the past. Now then, shall we retire?"

Potter nodded once and he smiled shyly. He slowly followed Severus as Severus made his way to the bedroom. His bedroom was large and there was a four poster double bed in the middle. One tall wardrobe stood in the corner and two bedside tables stood beside the bed.

One side of the bed was slept in and Severus turned to Potter. The younger male had followed him quite easily but Severus could tell by one look at Potter that he could not make it to the bed without stumbling.

He placed his hand on Potter's tense shoulder and pushed him towards the bed. "About five feet before you is the bed. If you put your hand out now, you can feel it when you take another two steps. Just push yourself up on the bed, there you go."

Severus tried to ignore how well Potter seemed to fit in his bed and how well he looked sitting there. It roused something inside of him, something that hadn't stirred in a long time. He took a deep breath and said.

"I shall go and get you a glass of water."

He returned after a moment. He didn't want to look at himself in the mirror out of fear of what he would find. He stopped in his tracks when he noticed that Potter had turned down the blankets and had already curled up underneath them.

By the looks of it, Potter was already halfway to dream land. His eyes were closed and his breathing was slow and even. Despite himself and he should be feeling annoyed, Severus felt a rare smile pull at his lips.

He set the glass down on the bedside beside Potter and pulled the blankets up to cover the younger male. He hesitated for a moment before running a slow hand through Harry's hair.

Cursing himself for nostalgia Severus crossed the room to his own side of the bed and crawled in. As he curled on his side and away from Potter an unexpected thought came to him before sleep claimed him.

_I could get used to this_

And no amount of horrible memories of Potters everywhere could dispel that thought from settling firmly into his mind and following him deeper into sleep.

**That is it for now. I hope you liked it. Review please and send some ideas for some morning awkwardness and perhaps some fluff between Harry and Snape.**

**In the next chapter: Having ****spent the night in Snape's bed without the aid of medications gives Harry a good night rest, but what he didn't expect was that waking up with his master may be more awkward then he could anticipate? Can Severus keep his morning temper under control when he is embarrassed on how they had woken up? And can Ron and Hermione proof some needed distraction for Harry and can he bond with them or will Ron's temper rule him and possible anger Snape? That and more in: Reoperation**


	20. Reoperation

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. **

**Note: Sorry for the lack of updates but term was hectic. But I have some good news; I finally have plenty of time to write so yay. Let's begin. Hints at sex and self pleasuring in this chapter, so be over joyed, I mean warned. **

Harry snuggled deeper into the warmth that was surrounding him. It was everywhere and he smiled unconsciously. He felt safe and surrounded by magic. For the first time since the accident he felt alright and relaxed. He turned on his right side, rolling against the source of heat in his bed and he snuggled into the firm body.

Something around his waist tightened and the leg that was resting in between his own, moved for a moment before settling back down. A sigh ruffled his hair and Harry blinked awake. He frowned at the sensation of feeling another body stretched out against his.

To feel a hand on his hip, and an arm that lay around his waist. To feel a firm chest underneath his cheek and to hear the soft heartbeat in his ear. He was feeling too relaxed….the feeling he had come to associate with the time after having an orgasm. Well, the times he had indulged in a quick wank in the shower or in bed.

He shifted his hips slightly. No, he wasn't sticky and he would surely have remembered a wet dream. His hips stroked against a firm stomach and Harry could feel his cock twitching against the sensations. Horror flowed through him and he tried to still his movements in vain, hoping his cock would stop hardening.

_Please don't let Snape wake up! It's one thing to wake up with a stiffy when you're in the dorm and to have the mickey taken out of you by the other lads but this is just embarrassing. Come on, it's Snape! Think of aunt Petunia in a bathing suit! Think of McGonagall sunbathing in knickers….something…_

A hand clamped down on his hip and a rough sleep voice hissed. "Stop squirming!"

_Oh Merlin…_ Harry closed his eyes in mortification. Hot breath warmed his cheeks before Snape murmured. "If you need help, all you had to do was to say so. You know as your master I'm required to take care of _everything_." Harry's eyes flew open as the last word was stretched and he could see the smirk that played over the thin lips clearly.

Snape's eyes were aglow with something and then Snape's mouth descended upon his. Harry's lips parted underneath the thin ones and he relaxed into the kiss, moaning softly. He rolled onto his back, pulling Snape on top of him as he bucked into the sinful fingers playing over his cock. There was urgency to his movements as he clawed at Snape's back, seeking to pull his master into a deeper intimacy.

He kissed Snape back, letting him know he liked it. He was frotting against the older man, stroking his cock against the firm thigh that was suddenly there. When Snape pressed his thigh down obediently, Harry moaned loudly. He was so close….and as Snape's fingers closed over a nipple, he came in a flash of white heat….

Harry's eyes flew open and he immediately rolled away from Snape, turning on his side. He lay there panting for a moment, trying not to give into the urge to rub his throbbing cock through his trousers or pay heed to the way his throat and chest were painfully aching.

What a dream that had been. He ran a hand over his face, feeling the sweat beginning to cool in the cold hair of the dungeons. He sat up slowly, blinking into the greyish light. The room refused to come into focus and Harry sighed. His chest felt tight and he resisted the urge to cry.

_My life is fucked! I feel like crap, I'm aroused and I just had a wet dream about Snape…._

He felt frustrated, unable to escape to even the bathroom out of fear of knocking something over and waking Snape. He couldn't even wank. He lay back down, hoping that the cold sheets would help ease his cock into submission.

His shoulders shook as he began to realize that this wouldn't be easy. His throat felt constricted and hurt like hell. He wiped a hand over his eyes, only seeing shadows and not easing the painful sting of tears at all. He would never be able to see properly. Not that he ever had but this would be even worse.

All his life he had made due with glasses. And he had been okay with that. Sure, his eyesight was bad but it was better than being completely blind. But this…He would be useless. He would have to relearn everything.

He could only imagine the months stretched out before him. He would be confided to the castle, perhaps even to a set of rooms as he built up his strength again. And it wasn't even confirmed yet if he would become completely healthy again or would depend on assistance for the rest of his life.

It was too much and he broke. His shoulders shook with sobs as tears fell from his closed eyes, over burned cheeks and Harry felt the pain keenly that the salty tears did to his wounds. It only made him cry harder.

"What the…Harry?" A hand on his hip had him rolling over and he clung to Snape, not caring for anything. If he could feel Snape stiffen in his arms, that didn't matter because Harry only hung on tighter. He buried his head against Snape's chest, feeling arms wrap around him as Snape rocked them.

Soon his tears stopped falling and Snape pulled away. Harry could feel the dark eyes upon him but he kept his eyes cast down. He was sure that if he looked at Snape now, he would do something embarrassing, such as kiss the man.

"Now, what prompted this outburst? It could not have been anything I done. I was lying here, sleeping like an angel." Snape's voice was soft and Harry shrugged. He could hardly tell his master. He cleared his throat. Not caring for how painful it was and said.

"Just overwhelmed me…I guess…"

"You guess?" Snape's voice dripped with disbelieve and Harry bit back a sob of regret that he wasn't able to read Snape's face. Usually it was mask but sometimes his master's eyes revealed what he was thinking or feeling.

Harry rolled away from Snape slightly. He didn't want his master to see what the close contact had done to him. It had not helped his problem at all. In fact it had only made his cock throb even more. He cast his eyes down, hoping that Snape would not see his problem.

"Yeah, I…I wanted to use the loo and I didn't want to wake you! Besides not knowing the way…I….can't see where I am going and I would knock something over, waking you." He didn't think that Snape needed to know the reason why he had to use the loo.

"You could have just woken me. It would have saved us both some trouble." Snape's voice was brusque and then Harry could feel the bed dip as Snape moved. "Still need help?"

Immediately Harry shook his head. He didn't have to go any longer and really, if he was to stand up now then his problem would only be too obvious. "No, it is okay." He yawned, unable to help himself.

He could feel Snape's eyes upon his but he refused to meet them. The older wizard finally snorted and then lay back down. Harry did the same. It was hard to relax but he had to try. He closed his eyes, breathing out deeply as he tried to give into the ever present exhaustion.

"You do realize that I'm willing to assist with whatever the problem is." Harry's eyes flew open and he turned back to gaze at Snape. He opened his mouth and closed it again, unsure of how to answer.

Hp

Severus didn't look away from Harry once. The younger man was staring up at him; green eyes shy as Harry's gaze slid down again. He kept his face blank, waiting for his apprentice to say something.

For once the apprenticeship bond was silent, allowing him to relax fully. Harry was close to his side and he would immediately notice if something was wrong with Harry. It had taken him a moment to pull himself from sleep when Harry had pulled away from him.

He had barely even noticed just how close they had slept together, a testimony of his own exhausted state. He had been awoken abruptly as Harry pulled away. Severus had to do a double take as he noticed the flush in Harry's cheeks.

Harry refused to meet his eyes and Severus frowned. He leaned in a little bit closer to Harry and asked. "You said that you needed to use the loo…do I need to conclude that that trip will no longer be necessary?"

Harry's eyes met his in a moment as they widened and he exclaimed, his voice breaking. "Of course not!" The mortification and the horror on Harry's face made Severus frown. "I don't wet the bed…." Harry's voice nearly dropped to a growl but his throat could not handle that. Harry glanced away again and Severus bit back a smirk.

"I didn't think so. But now that you are horrified enough over that question, perhaps you can tell me why you keep squirming if the problem has passed." Harry flashed underneath his gaze and Severus' eyes narrowed.

"Then if you would be so kind as to tell me what the problem is that required you to need the loo in the first place, then we can go about solving it and we can go back to sleep." He snapped, out of patience. He was not a patient man in the best of times and it was the middle of the night.

The green eyes flashed with ire and then Harry snapped in a whisper. "I was hoping to take care of sometime by myself so I wouldn't wake you! But seeing as I can hardly go about mounting the furniture, I suppose it will have to wait!"

"Potter, what in the blazes are you blabbering about?" Severus frowned. Harry looked away again, pulling the blankets to cover himself awkwardly. Severus' eyes narrowed, he wondered what he had missed. He had held Potter earlier when the younger man had cried but suddenly Potter had pulled away as if he had been afraid that Severus would notice something…

But what could it have been? The younger man was still flushing and refused to meet Severus' eyes.

_It's not the first time that Potter's shared a bed with me. So what is so different now? He had been drugged the last few times; this is the first time that he is fully conscious with this, even when he's still in pain. But that should not change anything unless…._

Severus was suddenly reminded of his own teenage years. He had woken up with an erection every morning in the dorm, all boys usually did and it was not something to brag or be teased about. _Not when we were 17 but when we were younger, yes teasing was in order…But Harry…_

Severus shifted slightly. This was not a conversation he was keen to have. But it was his duty as Harry's master. He cleared his throat, smiling slightly as Harry glanced up at him.

"Harry, becoming sexually aroused at the proximity of another body is nothing strange at your age. Even when that somebody is your greasy git of a Potions Master as I believe I am called in the corridors. I know that this is embarrassing and trust me, this is not what I want to be doing right now at this time, but it seems that we need to have it. The relationship of a master and apprentice is a close bond and in the past few days, since the attack, we have been spending a lot of time with each other. Normally a close bond between master and apprentices, at least one close enough to share a bed with another, it takes months or perhaps years to form naturally. I am not saying that we have been forced into this but it is natural for you to feel this way." He was grateful that Harry couldn't see how uncomfortable he was feeling now.

Harry flushed even more and then whispered. "Do we really need to talk about this now? I….I would rather sleep if it is all the same."

Severus wanted to snarl that it was not alright but he knew better than to push Potter. He nodded and then realizing Harry wouldn't be able to see, he answered. "It is fine. Do you require water or anything else?"

"Some water would be nice." Harry's voice was a weak rasp. Severus gave the blankets another tug so they would cover Harry and he then rose from the bed. The stones were cold underneath his feet but he had long learned to dismiss it.

He filled up a glass with water in the bathroom and took a moment to glance at himself in the mirror. He looked tired, dark circles underneath his eyes but his eyes were surprisingly awake. He shook his head firmly at himself. He quickly filled a glass of water before going back into the bedroom.

He stopped when he noticed Harry was stretched out in the middle of the bed, asleep. Severus rolled his eyes and yet he couldn't help but smile as he set the glass down upon the bedside table and sought to move Harry by pushing at him. But when Harry rolled over and curled up to him instead, Severus instead pulled him closer. One more night couldn't hurt anyone, right?

Hp

When Harry woke up, he first thought that he was dreaming again. He felt so comfortable and warm. His back was against a firm back and there was a hand on his hip. He yawned, blinking his eyes open as he ran a hand over his face. He stretched, pushing back against Snape.

There was a hardness that was rising against his backside but Harry paid no mind to it. His own cock was stirring but Harry was feeling too relaxed to really care much for it. He wiggled around a little, trying to find a comfortable spot as he choked back a cough.

He really didn't want to wake Snape and for once he wasn't hurting too badly. He pulled the blankets up higher as he stretches out one hand to feel the cold of the other side of the bed. That was supposed to be his side, he knew that but somehow he had ended up cuddled right into Snape.

Harry grew tense as he realized what exactly the warm breath brushing his neck was doing to him. He could feel his cock hardening and he closed his eyes tightly, hoping against his better judgement that it wasn't happening again.

He held still, wondering if Snape was still asleep. The deep breaths seemed to indicate so. He moved carefully, moving his hand down and pressing his palm against his groin. He groaned softly. This felt amazing. No this felt beyond amazing. It had been so long…

Harry applied a little bit more pressure. The fabric of the sweatpants he was wearing hurt his sensitive palms a little bit but it only added to the pleasure of the experience. He tried not to make a sound. He kept his eyes open for any sign of Snape waking.

He had wanked in the dorm before but usually with silencing charms up. He could hardly do that here. By the time he had scrambled to the other side of the bed to snatch his wand, Snape had already woken up. He would have to take advantage of the current situation.

He applied a little bit more pressure. His arousal was only spiked up a notch as Harry closed his eyes and recalled his dream. The feel of Snape's hands on his hip and the thought of Snape's lips on his made him buck his hips into his hand. He bit back a frustrating moan. It wasn't enough pressure.

He refocused his attention on what he was doing. He bucked into his hand, not daring to touch his cock. He knew that the slightest movement could wake Snape. The spy was a light sleeper but that only added to his arousal. He could feel something rising against his arse where Snape was pressing up against him.

He increased the pressure and the frequency of his trusts into his hand. He palmed his cock through his trousers. He breathed in deeply, trying not to give himself away by panting. He froze when Snape moved a little bit behind him, pushing his erection more firmly against Harry's arse and moving his hand to splay over Harry's stomach before settling down again.

_Snape is aroused….Is it because of me or….? I don't know anything about what Snape likes in his lovers, if he is even looking for a lover. He has hinted at it that it sometimes is a natural step from a master and apprenticeship bond but still…_

Harry had to bite back a moan as he became aware of Snape's magic that was humming underneath his skin. He could feel it touching his own, making him only more aroused. He was aware of Snape's body heat and the very scent of the man and the magic that surrounded his master.

He closed his eyes tightly, licking his lips as he imagined the dark eyes that looked at him, full of fire and passion. The long slender hands that would travel over Harry's body, making him moan and squirm underneath. The thin lips as they pressed together in approval before they parted to kiss Harry's lips. The fingers that wrapped around his cock and applied pressure in all the delightful ways that Harry needed to come…

His eyes flew open when a hand covered his, pressing over his cock and applying pressure. He looked behind him, feeling Snape move slightly behind him.

Harry was turned on his back and even before Snape could say something he blurted out. "It isn't what it looks like."

Harry could barely make out Snape's face but he could imagine his master raising an eyebrow at the statement. "Oh it isn't? To me it looks like you were pleasuring yourself."

_Oh Merlin, I'm screwed!_ Harry could only glance up into the dark eyes, too stunned to answer.

Hp

Severus held Harry's eyes, even when he knew that the younger male couldn't see him clearly. He didn't glance down as he applied the pressure Harry so obviously craved. He kept his eyes on Harry's face to gauge his reaction. Harry's lips parted and then the younger man's eyes fluttered closed as a moan escaped the full lips.

Severus leaned down so he could whisper in Harry's ear, his warm breath teasing his apprentice's neck. "I can give you what you want, Harry. I can give you what you need…"

Harry whimpered and the green eyes flew open as they locked with Severus' dark ones.

"All you have to do is say yes, Harry…" Severus would not do anything without Harry's consent. He had to know that Harry wanted this.

He was unprepared when Harry suddenly reached up and tangled his hand in Severus' hair, tugging his head down. Lips touched his hesitantly and then Harry softly murmured. "Yes, Severus, please."

That was all Severus needed to take control of the kiss as he rolled on top of Harry. His tongue swept over Harry's lips and they parted underneath his so Severus could slide his tongue in. He was careful not to hurt Harry and only giving what Harry wanted to receive.

The bond buzzed in his mind with need and want and Harry's magic was a whisper against his skin, arousing Severus further. Harry gave back as good as he got and Severus groaned in appreciation.

He replaced his hand with his thigh, noticing the urgency in Harry's movements. He trailed one hand over Harry's thigh up to his hip and Harry clawed at his back, burying his face in Severus' throat as Harry came in a rush of sticky heat.

Severus could feel the wetness spread against his leg and he pulled back slightly to look at Harry. The younger male was blinking up at him with a slight smile as he said. "Guess I really need that shower now."

Despite himself Severus felt himself laugh. The tension seemed to flow from him as he chuckled and purred. "I suppose you'll need help with that as well."

He rolled off of Harry and ran a hand through his own hair to pull it away from his face. Now that the heat of the moment had passed he could see Harry wetting his lips.

"Are you thirsty?"

"Yeah a little bit." Harry's voice was still a whisper but it sounded better than before. Perhaps it also had something to do with the fact that Harry was relatively relaxed. Severus knew that an orgasm produced hormones that reduced pain.

"_Accio _glass of water." Sitting up and raising his wand, Severus caught the glass of water that came floating over to him. He held the glass to Harry's lips as he helped Harry sitting up. It wouldn't do to have him choke.

"Careful sips." He instructed his apprentice. Harry was thirsty because within a few moments the glass was empty. Severus held his wand over the glass, ready to summon more water.

Harry wet his lips again and then rubbed at his chest. "Can I have more potions today?"

"I will have to discuss it with Poppy but I am sure that she will be glad that you survived the night and made it through fairly easy." A slightly more pressing concern made itself known to Severus and he rose from the bed. "Do you want to nap before taking that shower?"

He could see the color rising in Harry's cheeks but he refused to feel any shame over what they just did. It was part of what being a master was about. Perhaps in a normal apprenticeship he would not have done this so soon or perhaps done this at all, but this problem had been bugging Harry all day.

He hoped that Harry would be able to relax a little bit now. It would only benefit his healing.

"Don't need help with the shower….I…."

Severus frowned as he turned back to Harry. The younger wizard was looking away from him, refusing to meet his gaze.

"Harry, there is nothing to be ashamed of. What we did is nothing shameful…"

"But you're….my master…" The green eyes rose up to meet his and Severus sighed before he answered.

"Yes, I am. Would you rather have somebody else help you with this? I have told you before that the bond between a master and his apprentice is a close one. It is certainly close enough that some marry their master or their apprentice. There is no reason for you to feel ashamed or embarrassed by this…"

"I'm not…." But the moment Harry utter the words, Severus knew Harry was lying. But as his apprentice refused to look at him again. Severus decided to let it go for now. And yet, he couldn't help but feel a twinge of disappointment in his chest. He was a fool for hoping for more than Harry was clearly willing to give.

Hp

Harry heaved a sigh of relief as the strong spray of the shower washed over him. The humid hot air was making him feel better and breathe easier. He didn't want to think of the bathroom door that was slightly ajar or the fact that Snape was probably waiting outside the door to listen if Harry needed help.

But Harry needed time alone. He needed time to think. He leaned against the wall of the shower and closed his eyes. The encounter between him and Snape had left him confused. He didn't know what to think. He was not ashamed it had happened but it had felt weird.

How could he look Snape in the eye again when all he was thinking about was having the man's hands on him again? He was Snape's apprentice, a duty and no more to his master.

_But that isn't true. Snape has gone above and beyond to help you. I doubt he sees you as a duty any longer. He has hinted at it before, the aspect of the apprentice bond of being lovers. But I don't want him to feel pressured. I want him to consider it because he likes me. And hell, why am I even considering it…_

Harry ran a hand over his chest. It felt tight and it was starting to hurt but not as bad as it had earlier. Perhaps Snape had been right in saying that sex released hormones that worked as pain killers. _If that is the case then I will be doing this more often…_

That line of thought got him thinking about the encounter again and Harry sighed. This was not helping him get clean. His feelings concerning Snape confused him. He had loathed the man for so long and now….He was getting to know Snape on a different level. He was getting to know the man behind the mask of the hateful Potions Master and for some reason Snape intrigued him.

Perhaps it was because Snape took care of him or perhaps it was something else but Harry didn't know. But right now that was a moot point, because he was finally in the shower and alone and Harry intended to get clean.

He wasn't sure if he was allowed to use soap but the spray of hot water felt amazing as well. It felt so good to be clean. He put his head under the spray and allowed his hair to get wet.

"Potter?" Harry stumbled as the deep voice came.

"Yeah?" He called back, trying not to wince as his voice gave out.

"I put bottles of scent and perfume free shower gel and shampoo on the ledge inside the shower. If you cannot find them, call for me. They are on the ledge that is directly on the opposite side of the shower head. You should be able to find them. Call for me if you need anything."

Feeling suddenly grateful, Harry palmed the walls for the ledge. He was careful not to move too fast lest he knock something over. When his hand closed around a bottle, he pulled it to him. He uncapped it, wondering what it was.

Sighing he decided that he could care less. Clean was clean and he had every intension of getting clean. He washed himself quickly, trying not to wince as the hot water soaked his hands. Rinsing himself off, he stepped out from the shower. There were towels somewhere in the room, as were his clothes but for the life of him, Harry couldn't figure out where.

His good mood soured; perhaps he needed help after all.

Hp

Severus glanced up from the book he had been trying to read when he heard the tentative whisper of "Professor". He rose from his seat. He had added a charm that multiplied sound so he could hear if Harry needed help.

He knocked on the door, not entirely comfortable with barging in on Harry in the shower. After a long moment he stepped inside. The air inside the room was humid and Severus was glad that he wasn't wearing any robes. His eyes sought Harry and found him.

The younger man was leaning against the wall, obvious exhausted and soaking wet. He frowned at the sight before him. Harry's body was turned away from him and the younger male was obviously embarrassed. Severus could not blame him.

"What do you require?" He kept his voice low and his eyes on Harry's face. The green eyes met his even when Severus knew that Harry couldn't see him.

"I can't find the towels." The younger man whispered.

_Ah right, those are the only things that I didn't put out. They are in the rack over there but Harry cannot see that. It is no wonder that he cannot find them and is soaking wet. _

Severus moved to the rack and picked up a black towel. His towels were not the fluffy kind though they were soft enough for his liking. "Here." He handed it to Harry. Backing away, he immediately said.

"Call me when you are done drying yourself off, unless you require aid with that as well?" He didn't await Harry's answer or nod, instead backing out of the door and into the bedroom. He ran a hand over his face in weariness. It was not even 9 am and he was already exhausted.

The sleep that he had gotten with Harry in his bed had not been nearly as restful as it should have been and his temper was beginning to show. He would have to take care not to let it show too much around Harry.

The soft call of his name had him going back into the bathroom. Harry had wrapped the towel around himself, coughing lightly. Steadying him with one hand on his shoulder, Severus used the other to lightly push Harry's bangs out of his face so he could see his eyes.

Harry's eyes were duller than they had been before but Severus knew that was due to exhaustion. Severus could not see the damage that had been done to Harry's eyes. His apprentice was panting slightly and Severus raised an eyebrow as he asked.

"Do you need help dressing yourself?"

Harry flushed a faint red color and then whispered. "Some help would be nice, yes, thank you."

Severus nodded until he remembered that Harry couldn't see it and said. "Very well. Do you require aid with the dressing part or can I just hand them to you? "

Harry frowned. "I think handing them to me would be fine, sir."

"Severus." The older wizard whispered and he wondered if Harry had heard him. The younger wizard smile and echoed the name. Severus decided to ignore the tightening in his chest at the sound of his name on Harry's lips.

He had to force himself not to let his eyes drift down the body hidden by the towel. Normally a young naked man in his bathroom was not a common occurrence, not when Severus himself had been dressed as he was.

He shook his head firmly as he recalled what had happened earlier today. He shouldn't be thinking about this. It was merely a lapse of judgement on his part as he helped Harry, nothing more. That Harry hadn't pushed him away meant nothing. He remembered being Harry's age with all the pleasures it could bring and how easily it was to welcome somebody's touch.

It said little over Harry's desires or his needs and wants. Severus would not delude himself into thinking that he was what Harry desired when he thought of a lover.

"Madam Pomfrey has given me new clothes for you to wear. They have been washed and sterilized. Is that agreeable?" Harry nodded wearily and rubbed at his eyes as if they were irritating him. "Is anything hurting?"

Immediately Harry shook his head. "No, just sleepy." The younger man said, mouthing working around a yawn.

_Yeah that makes two of us_

Severus had long learned to ignore his exhaustion in favour of duty. He was doing the same thing now. But this exhaustion didn't come from the body but from the soul as well. He was weary after the burdens he had carried for so long had disappeared. He did feel lighter, that was true but it had only been a few months since the end of the war and he needed time to recuperate.

"You can sleep once you are dressed…" Perhaps Severus could get some peace himself for a moment. Take a shower and enjoy a nap or some reading. He needed some time alone, some peace in which he did not have to take care of somebody.

"Will you sleep then too?" Severus' head snapped up from bending over the bundle of clothes he had taken with him into the room. Harry's green eyes were fixed on him and even though Severus knew Harry couldn't see him, he wondered for a long moment if Harry was as blind as Poppy thought he was.

"Mr Potter, I really do not think that you need to concern yourself with my sleeping habits." He made his voice drop a little bit to make it a little bit silkier.

"Actually….you're my master and you need to rest too….Else when I'm well again then I need to take care of you. I think that you will be a worse patient than I am, honest." Harry's smirk was pure Slytherin and Severus had to bite back his arousal.

"And how will you make me?" He raised an eyebrow at the question.

"I have my ways…" Harry began and then began to cough. They were deep wrecking coughs and Severus approached his apprentice with a glass of water. He waited until the coughing had subsided so Harry could take a sip.

"Now that you are done with coughing your lungs back up, shall we see about getting you dressed, Mr Potter?"

Helping Harry dress was easier than Severus had imagined. He had expected Harry to make a fuss but the younger wizard was obviously too tired to raise any questions about something. He did as Severus instructed and did not require a lot of aid on Severus' part.

Harry was swaying with exhaustion by the end of it and only Severus' quick assistance saved him from a sure fall. Severus allowed his apprentice to lean against him as he straightened the bathroom with a wave of his wand.

"Come, I believe that it is time to get you down for a nap."

"Not a small kid, Sev…." The younger man wheezed around a yawn. Severus decided that for this once he could let the shortening of his given name slip as he helped Harry to the bedroom. His apprentice was leaning heavily upon him and Severus carefully helped him lay down on the bed.

Harry curled up on his side on the bed, over Severus' usual spot. He glanced up at Severus as he blinked back sleep. "Join me?" The request was so innocent and so very inviting that Severus had to swallow back an eager yes.

"Not until I have had my own shower." He answered instead. It wouldn't do to get used to something like this only to have it snatched away from him as Harry became well again and realized he could do better than Severus.

"Kay…" Harry seemed a little disappointed but Severus could not deduce anything else from the other man's face or tone of voice. He tugged a light blanket over Harry and then nodded.

"Call if you need anything." He nodded, leaning over Harry slightly. The Gryffindor turned to him and wrapping one arm around Severus' neck pulled him to him. He kissed Severus on the lips briefly and then softly whispered. "Thank you for helping me."

Pulling back and raising two fingers to his lips, Severus watched as Harry finally gave into sleep.

_I'll be damned._

Harry Potter continued to surprise him.

Hp

The living room was a warm place to be, Harry realized. The fire was burning and Harry had closed his eyes to enjoy the warmth of the fire on his face. Snape had moved the couch closer to the fireplace and Harry had claimed the spot on the couch in front of the fire.

Harry had no idea where Snape was but at the moment he felt too content to care. His throat and chest were still hurting but they didn't bother him that much. He was feeling rested due to his nap.

Snape had supplied him with the usual potions, one that fought infections and pain, another one to heal his throat and airways, a potion to reduce any fevers, a nutrition potion and more. Because of his healing throat, Snape had spelled the potions directly into his stomach, which had not been pleasant.

Harry glanced up as Snape came into the room. The Potions Master appeared agitated about something but Harry wasn't sure what. Snape had been in his office, Harry knew that much but what Snape had been doing he had no idea. Probably grading.

"The peace in the dungeon is about to be shattered, Potter. I just had a call from Minerva, asking if you are well enough to see your friends. While Poppy would no doubt tell me that it is unwise to allow them access to you because the excitement would be too much, I on the other hand disagree."

Harry blinked up at Snape, stunned for a moment. Snape had never been overly joyous where Gryffindors were concerned, so Harry was a little bit surprised to have Snape saying Hermione and Ron could visit him. Especially in his private rooms. Harry had suspected that they were like a sanctuary to the older man and where none was invited without Snape's approval.

Harry could almost hear Snape's smirk in his voice and the roll of the black eyes even when he couldn't see it as Snape said. "But she, unlike myself, does not have to deal with the disappointed Gryffindors that will surely follow a rejection of Minerva's plan. Nor does she, unlike myself again, have to explain to _your _friends why Draco Malfoy is allowed to visit and not your best friends. I think that she would agree that the easiest and quickest solution for us all if we would allow your friends to visit. It would certainly make things easier for me, especially when I have work for both Mr Weasley and Miss Granger. "

"So they're coming…now?" It had been so long that he had seen his friends. It would be good to see them again. He couldn't really see them, not the way he normally would have. He would not be able to see the way they looked at him, guess their thoughts from their facial expressions or see actually the details that made them but he did want to see them.

"Yes, they are coming down now, yes. Minerva bullied me into that one. That blasted woman knows too much, much more than is good for her or for me." Snape paced the living room; Harry could hear his footsteps as he walked back and forth.

He followed Snape with his eyes even when he could only see a black blur. Snape stopped his pacing suddenly and glanced up to where Harry assumed was the door.

"Ready or not, Potter, the peace is about to be shattered by the arrival of your friends. I shall turn the couch around so that they at least have access to you. I know how prone to hugging Miss Granger is." Snape's tone was dry and Harry nodded.

_I wonder how they will react when they see me…_

Harry closed his eyes and pushed his magic out. He could feel it brushing against Snape's magic, though it was a little but further away. There was also magic that was familiar to him. He could hear the faint murmur of their voices as they greeted Professor Snape.

He sat up a little bit straighter and glanced in the general direction as footsteps came closer. He smiled; it was good to see his friends again.

"Hey, Harry, you won't believe what we had to go through in order to get in…"

Ron fell silent suddenly and it was Hermione's gasp of either horror or surprise, Harry wasn't sure, that made him aware that they were reacting to him. He tried not to let his own surprise show because he knew he looked a sight. His lips were still cracked and blistered as were his cheeks and the skin around his eyes. His eyes were too bright almost as though he was feverish and nobody could mistake the way he wheezed for breath.

"Oh, Harry." Hermione moaned. Her voice was breaking and she sounded on the verge of tears. Surely this wasn't only because of him….

"Mate, you look terrible." Ron finally managed to choke out. Harry forced out a breathless laugh. It was an understatement and Harry waited for a joke to come. They always made some sort of joke but when an awkward silence began to fall, Harry realized that this time it wouldn't come. He frowned.

"Dennis did this?" Ron turned away from Harry though he could still feel his friend's eyes upon him now and again.

"Yes, he was the one responsible." Snape's voice revealed nothing. Harry glanced up at Ron, even when he couldn't see his best friend's face. He wanted to know what Ron was thinking.

He pushed out his magic slightly so it was brushing Ron's magic. He could hear Ron's surprised intake of breath and he jerked up to look at Harry. Just as quickly he looked away again.

"Thank you for allowing us to see him, Professor…." Hermione's voice was trembling and then it broke. Harry had never been entirely comfortable with females crying but he had never seen Hermione cry except in the first year.

He cuddled in on himself. They didn't have to touch him but perhaps they could come a little bit closer to him and….

Ron was making soft noises to Hermione who was whispering about him. He just knew it. He could feel it. He had spent too much time with them to know when they were talking about him. Were things really this bad at the moment? He didn't feel so bad but that could also be because he had been given a pain potion.

He wondered for a brief moment if Snape had been allowed to give him that but he didn't really care. It made him feel better and that was at the moment all that mattered.

"Hermione, 's not so bad…" He managed to whisper. He wanted to reach out and touch her but he wasn't so sure if that was a good idea. He forced a grin to his face, hoping that they wouldn't see how much it was hurting that they couldn't even stand to look at him.

Hermione merely sobbed louder and then Snape's voice came, sharp as a whip. "Stop with the caterwauling, Miss Granger, you are only upsetting yourself further. Get a hold of yourself, girl."

"She's upset. What do you want her to do? Suck it up?" Ron's voice was harsh.

"She is here to visit her friend, not cry all over her boyfriend." Snape's voice was a low growl.

"And here I thought that you had grown a heart when you were taking care of Harry. But you are just as cold as you always are, Professor! You don't care about anybody, no you…"

"Do you even know of the reason why I am telling you this? It is to protect Harry! You are hurting him and upsetting him at a time when he cannot use it and certainly does not need it. So either suck it up or leave! I will not have Harry suffering a setback simply because you cannot control yourselves." Harry didn't even notice that he was trembling faintly but Snape had certainly seen it.

He could hear Hermione trying to pull herself together and Ron swore softly before he said. "I'm sorry, Harry, of course we're happy to be here and to visit with you."

Harry nodded; he was shivering ever so faintly. A hand touched his arm but it didn't feel at all like Snape's hand.

"Oh Harry, you really look terrible." Hermione was sitting beside him and she was touching him gently, not trying to hurt him. She had picked up his hand and was running light fingertips over his burned palms.

"Good looks ruined…" Harry grinned at her. He couldn't see her but it felt good to be so close to his best friends again.

"Nay, it gives you a certain edge. It looks like Professor Snape has been taking good care of you though." Harry nodded at her. He could almost hear her smile.

"Where's Ron? Still fighting with Professor…Snape?" Harry had no idea where his master was. He couldn't hear Snape or Ron. He really hoped that they weren't fighting, he didn't want that. Hermione patted his arm and softly said.

"No, they aren't fighting any more. The Professor is pacing and Ron is standing right there." Hermione nodded at him and then patted his hand again. It was done carefully and then Snape asked.

"I suppose the polite thing to do would be to ask if anybody cares for tea." Snape's very tone of voice made Harry realize just what Snape thought of the polite idea. Harry was feeling a little bit thirsty. He would murder for a cup of milky tea but he doubted that Snape would allow him to drink that. But some other tea would be nice as well.

He glanced up at his master and Snape sighed loudly. "By the look on Potter's face, I would say what he thinks of the idea. I suppose I shall go down to the kitchens to get some tea and sandwiches. Do not get into any of my things; else I will be holding you both responsible, Miss Granger and Mr Weasley." Snape's voice dropped menacingly.

"How can you hold us responsible?"

"Because Potter cannot move without hurting himself and he knows better than to go through my personal things. You two on the other hand, I do not trust. Do you really want me to explain myself further, Mr Weasley or shall I simply go and get some tea? Also given you a change to chat with your friend to see if I've been torturing him."

"Ah right…yeah of course. Thank you, Professor, some tea would be lovely." Perhaps Ron had matured. Harry certainly hoped so.

He would like to have some time alone with his friends, just listening to them talk to him. He didn't have to say much but just listening was fine as well. He glanced up in Ron's direction as his best friend sat down beside Harry.

"I suppose it would be a moot question to ask if he is threatening you well."

"Considering that you would have looked decisively worse if he wasn't, I can only summarize that he is looking after you and doing a better job of it than you yourself could have done." Harry held up his hands as both Hermione and Ron spoke at once. He had to grin.

"So, supporting him now?" He managed to choke out. He looked from Ron to Hermione, only guessing where they were.

"He's taking care of you, properly that is and he is doing it without grumble so much about it as he normally would. We didn't see you in the Infirmary but Malfoy said that you would only accept comfort from him so all we have to do is to put two and two together, mate and conclude that he is taking better care of you than anybody else could." Ron's voice was dry and Harry wondered what it cost his best friend to say these words.

"Besides, it is his duty as a master to take care of you. But I have done some research on these types of apprenticeships and the Potions Master's Guild is one of the few who offers full support to disabled apprentices or Potions Masters. If you had entered an apprenticeship with the Ministry you would have been decisively worse." It didn't surprise Harry that Hermione had done her research.

"But how are you otherwise, Harry? Besides the fact that you can't talk much or do anything else but lay on the couch. You lucky sod." Harry frowned at Ron before he said.

"Hey, I was in the middle of an explosion…I can lie on the couch and be taken care of. Oh…and I defeated Voldemort…." Harry laughed even as he coughed.

"Careful, mate, Snape won't like it when you die on our watch." Harry shook his head. He wasn't entirely sure about Snape's feelings regarding him. It was confusing enough to try and figure out what his own feelings were concerning the man. He had hated Snape for so long and while he had been slowly getting to know the man behind the mask, he was still confused with what happened this morning.

"Hey, earth to Harry!" He glanced up at the call of his name. Ron was waving a hand in front of his face and then said. "What has got you so lost in your thought? If I didn't know better I would say that you were dreaming of somebody…"

They couldn't possibly have guessed what Harry had been thinking. He sat very still and waited for the subject to pass. It usually did when either of his friends found another subject to talk about…"I was thinking…" He said, not sure how to continue.

"About?" It seemed that Ron was determined to have this conversation. Hermione had fallen silent which wasn't like her. Perhaps she was gathering her thoughts or waiting for Harry to finish speaking.

"I…IkissedSnape." Harry hadn't meant to blurt it out like that and it hurt his throat quite a lot to do so. He looked down immediately. Even when he couldn't see their face he didn't want to know what they had been thinking.

"Hold a sec; I thought I heard the words kissed and Snape in there!" Ron's voice was low and taking a deep breath and trying not to choke on it, Harry said.

"You did…." He let the sentence hang in the air.

"How did he take that? Hell, how did you think of that?"

"It felt right…." _And good and nice and…well nice didn't really cover it. It felt amazing._

"Right as in right or right as in bloody amazing?" Harry could feel his face flush as he held up two fingers.

"Ha, I knew it!"

"Know what?" Harry was a bit taken aback by Ron's outburst. He cursed his vision. He wanted to see Ron's expression.

"That you may like the other sex better than you like girls. All you've ever been obsessing about is either Snape or Malfoy. Not that there is anything wrong with it but it is good that you finally figured it out yourself. It saves Hermione the trouble of having to tell you." Harry frowned. If he was honest, he had been thinking of it lately but not in those terms.

Things had been shaken up enough with Ginny and everything that had happened. He had assumed that the lack of desire he had felt for Ginny had been due to the fact that he had just fought a battle and had been so tired. He had never thought that the relationship he had with Ginny and his lack of interest in girls had been due to anything else.

Could it really be that he was gay? It would explain a lot; he knew that much but what if it was true? Ron and Hermione seemed convinced of the fact.

"And it won't matter to you?" Harry had to know.

"No, mate of course not. Just as long as you're happy." And as Harry finally felt a smile breaking out, glad to know that he would be supported either way, he wondered, would his feelings regarding Snape always be this confusing or would there be something awkward between them? Only time would tell.

**That is it for now. I don't think that you were expecting that. Review of course and send me some ideas. **

**In the next chapter: Harry has a lot of thinking to do now that a new possibility has been made known to him by his friends. But can our wounded hero figure out his feelings regarding his master? Or will this influence their relationship? Ron and Hermione stick around and can Snape get along with them for Harry's sake and what will they say when Severus asks them for assistance? And can Severus overcome his own doubts where Harry is concerned or will he act like he always does and push his apprentice away? That and more in: Emotions. **


	21. Emotions

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter.**

**Note: Thanks for the reviews and sorry that it took so long but I moved recently so it has been incredibly hectic. Let's begin. Btw, I have a tumblr in case anybody is interested. **

Severus took a deep breath and counted to ten silently. He applied pressure to his temples to will away the headache that was steadily settling there. He always had a low tolerance for people but Gryffindors in particular were hard. And now he had a room full of them. Technically speaking there were only three but still, it felt like a room full.

Granger and Weasley were loud, not as louder as they used to be but still much too loud for Severus' sake. He liked his peace, especially in his rooms and they had invaded his sanctuary.

_You actually invited them in here._ Severus snarled at the little voice in his head to shut up. He focussed back on the conversation and the three teenagers sitting in his living room. Weasley and Granger were completely focussed on Harry. Granger was telling him about her parents and Severus rose to his feet.

He needed to do something. He couldn't sit here because he was sure that he would snap at one point. His patience had always worn thin and today was not a good day. The short and restless night he had had not done him any favours.

"Anybody care for any tea?" The words were whispered in a silky voice but he didn't care. He startled them, he could see it. Apparently they had forgotten that he was in the room. He sneered at them. Harry perked up at the sound of tea and he already knew what he apprentice was going to ask.

"Only weak tea with no milk or sugar. We do not want to aggravate your throat further." He beat Harry to it and the younger man deflated with a sigh. He nodded sadly and Severus had to suppress the ridiculous urge to offer Harry as many milky sweet teas as he could drink.

"Some tea would be nice, Professor. Do you require any help?" Granger turned to smile at him and Severus shook his head. He needed a moment to think and to be alone.

He didn't wait for Weasley's order before he moved to the small kitchen area. He could order tea from the house elves but there were times when it paid to go off to make his own tea. He could gather his thoughts and think, It may be seen as fleeing but Severus told himself it was strategic and for the safety of others. It would be hard explaining to Minerva that he had snapped and killed two heroes of the war.

He took a deep breath, glad to be out of the room and able to hear himself think. It was a relief. He ran a hand over his eyes, trying to will away the headache. He pointed his wand at the kettle to turn it on. He was weary.

His patience was running thin, especially with being forced to be civil towards the two Gryffindors. Weasley's laughter and Granger's inane chatter were grading on his nerves. He was used to being on his own but being forced to be around people all day, Potter he could cope with, but his friends. He needed some alcohol and a full night's rest for that.

He needed time to think on everything that had happened. Especially with Potter.

_You don't have to think about it. You can either ignore it or enjoy it while it lasts. You know that these things do not last long so why not enjoy it. It isn't as if Harry minds it. But he is just trying to make sense of what's happening and he wouldn't be the first to take advantage of a body when it is offered. Nor would you be?_

Severus recoiled from his own thoughts. This was going to end now. He was better than that. Yes there had been a time when he would have accepted comfort from a willing somebody but Potter was old enough to be his son, hell he was Lily's son for Merlin's sake and he was injured. He would not take advantage of that.

He was better than that. He had come a long way and while it had been hard he was not going to give up now. He could just see the headlines when this came out and it would not be in his favour. He had worked too hard to lose everything he had gained now over a little bit of comfort shared between the sheets.

No, the best choice he had would be to pretend it never happened. Perhaps if he played it right he could ever make Potter believe that it had all been a fever induced dream. Else he would have to become mean and that was not something he relished with his apprentice.

Hp

Harry was trying to stay awake but he kept yawning. He hid them behind his hands, hoping nobody would see them. He wasn't supposed to be so tired. He had taken a nap after his shower and he was already tired.

The third yawn was caught by Hermione and she gave him an odd look. "You're tired, Harry?"

He shook his head immediately and she frowned. "Are we boring you then?"

"No…" He began to protest. He wasn't bored. He wanted his friends here; it had been so long since they had time to catch up. He coughed a little and smiled at them. His mouth was dry and he wanted something to drink, anything would do. The heat of the fire behind him and the blankets Snape had dumped on the couch were making him warm and comfortable.

He tried desperately to listen for sounds coming from the kitchen and focus on the conversation around him. He just closed his eyes for a brief moment. He snapped awake a moment later when a hand touched his shoulder.

"I think it is time for that nap, Mr. Potter." The deep voice of his master brooked no argument but Harry couldn't help but say.

"I'm not tired…"

"Say that again without yawning." Harry scowled in the general direction that Snape was in. He was tired, yes, actually plain exhausted but he wasn't a little kid that needed to be put to bed.

"I'm fine, honestly." It came out a little bit sharper then he meant to but he didn't want to go to bed yet. He wanted to spend some more time with Ron and Hermione, just listening to them. Snape sighed; Harry could hear him exhaling harshly before he said.

"Fine, do not expect me to carry you to bed! You can drag yourself there." Harry merely nodded. Snape's demeanour was tense, like it had often been in class and for a brief moment Harry felt a flash of remorse. Perhaps he shouldn't struggle so. He licked his dry lips. He wouldn't have been able to sleep anyway, with a parched throat.

"Can I have some tea?" He asked, speaking slowly. He wasn't sure if Hermione was beaming at him or doing something else but a cup of tea was passed his way. It was lukewarm and weak without any sugar or milk and Harry knew that Snape had prepared it for him. He hid his smile behind his cup.

Soon the tea was gone and he couldn't fight it any longer. He was feeling so drowsy that he was sure that he would go to sleep here on the couch. He yawned again, too tired to work up the energy to say something as he rubbed at his eyes.

He glanced up when Snape said. "I suppose that now you do want to be carried off to bed."

"I can walk." Alright, so it may have been a little bit too much for Harry because he was swaying when he rose to his feet unsteadily but Snape was silent as he allowed Harry to hold onto his arm for extra balance.

"Say goodnight." Harry was too tired to comment or do anything but direct his feet towards the bedroom. Harry counted it a victory that nobody said anything when they entered Snape's bedroom instead of Harry's. The bed was made, by the house elves, Harry assumed but he didn't care. All he cared was for messing up that bed as he crawled underneath the blankets.

His master was a silent as he waited while Harry toed off his shoes and tuned back to Snape. He pressed closer to the older wizard, close enough to feel his body heat and the tantalizing magic that danced over his skin as he smiled and said.

"I promise to give them a time limit next time so they won't drive you up the wall."

Snape stiffened and Harry frowned, releasing his master's wrist before Snape murmured. "Perhaps we should put you on a time limit, Mr. Potter? Now, it is bedtime for you. I have ways to get rid of your friends."

"Mrs Weasley is going to be very upset if they can't find Ron's body." Harry murmured softly as he climbed into bed. He curled on his back, pulling the blankets over him. He held out an arm to Snape as he softly said.

"Can I make it up to you?" He grinned up at the older wizard but he didn't need to see Snape's expression to feel the temperature in the room drop. Snape pulled away and snarled at him.

"Yes, get well! And focus on that, not on anything else! _Listen_ to what your body is telling you and stop pretending to be fine. You are not fine! You need rest to get better so stop fighting me and do what you're told for once!" Snape pulled away and Harry blinked up at him stupidly.

"Okay, I guess..." He wasn't sure what he had done to deserve that. He had tried to get better as soon as he could and he had tried not to fight Snape or Madam Pomfrey as they said what he had to do to get better. But apparently it hadn't been enough. It was never enough.

But he wasn't going to cry. That time was past. He knew how strict Snape could be and he didn't like seeing anybody as weak. He wasn't going to be weak any longer.

"Do not guess, Potter! You act, you do not guess." Harry jerked back, too stunned by the anger he heard in Snape's voice.

"I'm sorry. I don't even know what I did…It isn't like I have been going out with my friends…all we did was talk…" His throat was closing and Harry was trying to keep breathing but he was wheezing. A hand curled around his shoulder and he ground him and Harry tried not to choke anymore. He took deep and even breaths like Snape had told him to do in the past and he slowly relaxed.

He leaned back against Snape, nuzzling against his throat and pressing kisses against the sallow cheek he felt close to his lips. Snape jerked away and finally said. "Go to sleep, Harry. We will talk when you are feeling better and more awake. You are confused and don't know what you're doing."

And with those words Harry was left alone, protest dying on his lips when the door slammed shut because he did know what he wanted and he wanted Snape.

Hp

Severus took a deep breath and leaned against the bedroom door for just a second, allowing himself to recover for a moment. It seemed that ignoring the problem until it went away would not be an option. He knew how stubborn Potter could be. This could turn out very ugly if he wasn't careful. He would have to lay down the law for Potter the next time his apprentice was awake.

His fingers stroked the bracelet for a moment as he focussed on Harry. The magic was calm so Harry was most likely asleep. Glad for small favours, Severus went back to the living room.

Weasley and Granger were waiting for him, sipping their teas and talking softly to one another. Granger glanced up as Severus approached and gave him a smile.

"Harry's asleep?"

"He's settled, yes."

"Is it normal for him to be this exhausted?" Weasley frowned at him and Severus bit back a snarl. It wouldn't do to snap at the younger male. He was concerned about Harry and he wasn't the only one.

He sat down, taking a moment to sip his tea before he said. "Harry has been on Dreamless Sleep since the attack. It was done to make sure that he was comfortable and would not get upset or too worked up to do more damage to his throat and lungs. Dreamless Sleep is monitored sharply and Harry was only given enough to allow him to sleep comfortably but it has some drawbacks. The first few days after getting off the Dreamless Sleep there is a heavy exhaustion that can only be cured by sleeping it off. Harry has only been off the potion for two days and he is still easily exhausted. He does need rest in order to recuperate but do not let this worry you too much. If I had suspected that something was wrong with Potter, something other than what we can expect, I would have reported it instantly."

"We don't doubt that for a moment, sir..." Hermione smiled at him and reached out to lay a hand on Ronald's arm. She shared a look with him and then continued.

"We want to thank you, Professor, for everything that you have done for Harry..."

"I would do no less for any other apprentice." It came out sharper then he intended and he could see Granger's eyes widen. He was too weary to mince his words for anyone today. Granger shared another look with Weasley before the youngest Weasley son smiled at her and then turned back to Severus.

"We know, sir but we would like to thank you all the same. Not everybody would have done what you have done or gone to such lengths. Harry needs somebody looking after him and I, for one, am glad that it's you because I know he is in good hands. We just want to thank you, Severus, nothing more. If there is anything we can do to help, you let us know." Weasley nodded at him and in that moment Severus realized how they had matured. He merely nodded.

This might be a good opening for his next point though. He finished his tea and put his cup back on the table before he said. "Actually, now that we are on the subject of help, there is something that I have been meaning to discuss with you both. Since the attack on Harry, you may have been aware that my classes have been cancelled due to the nature of Harry's injuries. The Headmistress thinks that it is time that I resume my classes except for the NEWT classes. But I cannot teach the lower years and take care of Harry. Professor McGonagall gave me a solution that should work, if you both are willing."

He waited for their nod before he continued. "You do not have to accept it right now, but think about it. I'm in need of teaching assistants who can teach the lower years. It will lighten my workload and you will not be responsible for administering exams or marking. I need at least four people who can teach the classes from the first to the fourth years. I will teach the fifth through the seventh years."

"Are we the only two who will be doing it? It will be a lot of work between the two of us, especially with our NEWTS coming?" Severus heard what she wasn't saying and he shook his head.

"No, I have two other students in mind to share the work load. I have not yet had the chance to talk to them."

"Who do you have in mind, sir?" Severus smirked as he said.

"Draco Malfoy and Neville Longbottom." He could see the look Granger and Weasley shared and he held up a hand before he said. "And no, I'm not doing it to embarrass Longbottom. He is interested in a teaching position as the Herbology teacher but he lacks the experience. It will look good on his resume for university or his apprenticeship with Professor Sprout. I think that he will do well and he and Draco are the only ones who actually finished the seventh year, after a fashion that is."

Severus poured another cup of tea for himself. He wasn't even sure if he should tell them this but he had no choice. Somebody needed to know in case things went downhill and he needed to give his reasoning for asking their help. They deserved that much. He finished his cup and leaned forward as he said.

"I'm weary. Wearier than I'm letting on. You have seen the injury the Dark Lord inflicted on me and I am not recovering as quickly as I would have liked. The idea was to have Harry help me but with his own injuries he cannot do that. I need to look after myself and that means making my work load lighter. Harry is my apprentice and therefore my first responsibility. I will aid him in getting better and…"

"But you need to focus on getting well yourself too, Professor. Harry wouldn't like it if you are to collapse because you invest so much in him. We will help in any way we can, be it with helping you teach or by helping you with Harry." Severus nodded at Ronald. The new maturity surprised him but he welcomed it as well.

"Yes, well let's not get too concerned. I wouldn't want to accuse you of caring." Severus smirked at Ronald's look. The Gryffindor grinned at him and then sobered as he asked.

"How is Harry doing? And please be honest with us, Severus. I think that we deserve that and we can handle it." Granger poured them some more tea as she directed her question to him. He did notice that her hands were shaking.

Ron passed him a cup of tea but he shook his head. He had drunk enough tea for now and he preferred to keep his hands free when he spoke. "We want to know the truth about how Harry is doing, no matter how bad it is. You're the only one we know that doesn't sugar-coat it and who will tell us the truth. We have to know so that we can be prepared and what happened this morning won't happen again."

Ronald untangled himself from Hermione and leaned forward as he said. "We reacted badly and we hurt Harry. I want to be prepared for the future so please tell us what we can expect."

It was an honest request and Severus decided to honour it. They deserved that much. "Harry is doing better than he was a few days ago. He is weak but he's slowly healing. The burns on his hands and face are starting to blister, which means that it is healing and the new skin is growing back. We are unsure of the extent of damage done to his lungs and airways until he has healed more. There is a possibility he will always have problems with his lungs and airway. But we cannot be sure until we can do some more tests. For now he should be given the chance to heal."

"And his eyes? I notice that he wasn't wearing his glasses." Hermione had been silent and she sat there shaking, clutching Ron's hand. Even Weasley looked pale and for a moment Severus contemplated telling them the rest. Ron's head snapped up and he asked.

"There is more, isn't there? Please tell us, we need to know if we are to help him." Severus nodded before he said.

"Harry's eyes were damaged as well. You cannot see it from the outside but when his cauldron exploded his glasses broke and some of the shards damaged his eyes. His eyes are damaged and Madam Pomfrey is very sure that nothing can be done about that. As far as we can tell there is scar tissue on his cornea and he is seeing grey patches. He will need to learn to live with that because no magic can cure it."

"Does that mean he has to learn to read again and everything?"

"Yes." Severus had been known to be blunt and he wasn't going to start to sugar-coat the truth now. The sooner they learned what was wrong with Potter the better.

"I have already contacted the Guild to see about getting in touch with a Potions Master who specializes in teaching blind apprentices. Harry's eyesight was already bad and it has only grown worse now. He will need to come to terms with that." And that would take time.

At the moment they had been so focussed on making sure that Harry was well physically that they were ignoring the mental state at the moment. But soon the issue would have to be addressed and Severus knew that it was going to be him who would have to guide Harry through it.

Ronald nodded and Hermione let out a dry sob. She was curled up at Ron's side and Severus was not sure how to deal with the girl. He had goaded her a lot when she had been in his class but except for a few memorial times she had rarely lost control. He had never hated her like he had implied but he had challenged her in order to make her better. Most of the teachers had welcomed her and had praised her for her hard work but he made her work harder. He had done it for a reason.

He could not praise her directly. He had been Head of Slytherin and this one was one sure way to praise her because she had earned it. Not everybody had seen it his way. He had more than his fair share of fights with Minerva about this particular subject.

"Whatever we need to do, we'll do." Ronald promised, meeting Severus' eyes and pulled him from his thoughts.

"Perchance you can visit for a while. I think it will cheer Harry up and that is what he needs now, something to take his mind off of things."

"Sure, do you want us to visit every day or do exercises with him?" Ronald seemed eager and Severus allowed himself to smile.

"He isn't allowed to leave these rooms but I'm sure that you can come up with something to do. As long as it does not revolve around destroying my private rooms. I do not care that you're war heroes; I will kill you if you do so and bury the bodies where nobody will ever find you. That will be a mystery nobody will ever solve."

Ron grinned and even Hermione laughed a watery laugh. "Duly noted, Professor. I suppose we will get going then and come back tomorrow if Harry is still feeling well enough. Take care of yourself, Professor and if there is anything that we need to do, then you know where to find us."

Hermione nudged Ron and they both rose to their feet. "Yes, the library I suppose." He smirked at her and Hermione shook her head. He walked them to the door and then said.

"Tell Longbottom I will contact him tomorrow to discuss this with him. You can tell him what it is about, lest my summons cause him to expire of fear." Ronald nodded and waved his hand before Severus closed the door behind them. He leaned against it for a moment, allowing himself to gather his thoughts and his energy. Perhaps Harry would be asleep a moment longer before Severus had to deal with him.

Hp

Harry woke up a few hours later, more rested as he took the time to stretch. He listened for a moment, trying to decide if there was somebody else in the bed. The other side of the bed was cold and the room felt empty and he deflated. Apparently Snape hadn't laid down for a nap. He sighed, the air that he expelled so forcefully harsh in his damaged throat.

He resisted the urge to cough as the tickling in his throat started again. He hoped it meant he was starting to heal. He didn't have any illusions that it was going to be an easy road. At the moment he was still pretty much out of it most of the day, walking around in a haze of exhaustion that he hoped would clear soon. Then he would feel the agony of his healing lungs and throat. He still had a long way to go and it would be a while before they would be able to tell what his limitations were.

_Well if I have to stay here a while the least I can do is make the most of my time here. Perhaps I can find out what's going on with Snape and make sure that he rests. If anybody needs a breather, it's him._

He rolled onto his back. He didn't know where Snape was. He couldn't hear his master anywhere or feel the comforting magic. He wondered where Snape was. He doubted the older man would have left his quarters, not without telling Harry.

He lay on his back for a moment longer before sitting up and reaching for his glasses. It was a habit that he couldn't shake and he drew back his hands when he remembered it didn't matter if he had them on or not. He sighed again before he chewed on his lip. He winced and shook his head at himself.

_Come on, Potter, you can do this. You spend your entire childhood running away from Dudley and getting beaten by Uncle Vernon and then when you come to school you have a Dark Lord after you. This is a walk in the park. You can do this. It is going to bloody hard but you have never given up and you're not going to do that now. You can do this. All you have to do is take the first step. Just sit up and get out of this bed._

And that is what Harry did. He had tried walking earlier but Snape had been in the room and would have been there to catch him. If Harry fell this time, well he doubted Snape would find him anytime soon. But he didn't care. He was a Gryffindor; risk taking is what he did.

The first step was the hardest and it took Harry a moment of finding his balance. It was a terrifying moment because he knew that there was light in the room but he could hardly see it. He didn't know the layout of the room and the chances of bumping or knocking something over were high.

But he didn't care. There would be a moment when he would have to take the first step alone and if he kept delaying it then he may never take that step. Now was a good time, now was the right moment and it didn't matter that the first step took ten of fifteen minutes because he had to rest in between, he would take it and that is what mattered.

It was a thoroughly winded Harry that finally sank down against the wall near the door. He was smiling widely though, glad with the progress he had made. He had only managed to knock his toes and his knees against the bed a few times before he laughed to stay clear of it. He had learned to feel out the room with one hand and the other one beside him to make sure he was trailing the furniture.

He wasn't sure he even had the right door that led to the living room but it didn't matter. He had made it this far even if he was on the other side of the room than where he needed to be.

_Good job, Harry. I think that either Snape is passed out on the couch or he left because I made so much noise that it would have woken the dead. But well done for getting this far._

If there was nobody around to praise him then Harry was going to do it himself. It was what taken him across the room, the constant talking to himself and encouraging himself to go further and just a few more steps till he could rest. But he had reached the other side of the room and that was what mattered.

That he would murder a glass of water or even the weak tea that Snape insisted on giving him didn't matter. He had made it to the other side.

He gave himself a moment before he pushed himself up to stand on shaking legs. He felt for the door handle and opened the door and shuffled inside. The smell of the fireplace hit him nearly at once and he realized where he was. He was in the right room. Relief made him shaky on his feet and he made his way over to the couch.

He sank down on the end of it and took a slow breath. He was trying to slow down his pounding heart. It took a moment but by the time he had calmed down enough he began to grow aware of his surroundings. The air that came from the fire was still warm but he wasn't sure if the fire had been banked or was still on. He didn't care. It was nice and warm in here.

He focussed on sending his magic out, trying to see if he could feel any magic objects in the room. He wondered if he would be able to feel the magic of the very castle. He could feel the magic of people around him so why wouldn't he be able to feel it from objects?

He could feel Snape's familiar magic around the room which would make sense because he was in his personal rooms. The very rooms were infused with his master's magic. Harry closed his eyes and relaxed his head back, giving himself a moment to rest.

It took him a moment until he realized that he wasn't the only one in the room. There was somebody snoring softly on what he could only assume was the other couch. Sitting up slowly, Harry glanced over at the other couch. He sighed, remembering that he couldn't see it.

So instead he sent out his magic He grinned at the sensation of feeling Snape's magic respond. The other man stirred briefly before settling back down and Harry pulled his magic back immediately. He didn't want to wake Snape when the older wizard was finally resting.

He could fend for himself for a few more hours. So he settled in to wait, closing his eyes briefly for his own nap.

Hp

Harry startled awake when a loud pop sounded. He glanced around the room wildly, his hands reaching for a wand that wasn't there. It took a moment to calm down and he settled when he smelled the wonderful scent of food. It made his mouth water and he wondered when he had last eaten something solid.

He waited a moment, trying to decide if Snape had woken up like him. But the soft snores continued and Harry sighed. Guess it was up to him to wake Snape, loath as he was to do so.

The first step was perhaps the most difficult and that was trying to decide where Snape was. Harry used his magic again. He didn't have the apprentice bond to guide him like Snape had. He slid towards the edge of the couch and then rose to his feet.

He reached the other couch the same way that he had managed to reach the living room, by holding one hand in front of him. Even still his knees bumped into the couch and he had to catch himself before he fell on top of Snape. He doubted his master would appreciate _that_.

He could see the brighter light of the fireplace coming from the left side and he could feel the warmth of the fire. Snape was lying on his side on the couch, Harry could tell by the swathe of darkness that was in front of him. He reached out with a hand and laid it on Snape's shoulder, or what felt like Snape's shoulder anyway and shook hard.

He should have been prepared for this moment, he really should have thought of this but Harry hadn't been thinking and that was how Snape managed to surprise him. The older wizard shot awake at once and Harry could feel the magic gathering, preparing to be released into a spell as a wand was raised in his face.

Snape must have pulled back at the last minute, Harry wasn't sure but it was a long moment before the wand was finally lowered. Snape exhaled harshly and then hissed.

"Dammit Potter, I could have killed you! Didn't your past experiences teach you anything?" Harry tried not to flinch away the way his name was hissed. It reminded him of the past years when Snape had hated him. In the past few weeks Snape had taken to calling him Harry and he had liked it.

"I just wanted to wake you to tell you that dinner is here." He said softly.

"You could have tried calling my name. You do not need to get physical." Snape snarled and Harry's temper reared its head.

"You didn't mind it the last time I got_ physical_." He snarled right back. The effect was ruined somewhat by the coughs that escaped him but Harry made up for it by glaring at Snape for all he was worth.

"What are you doing here anyway? You are supposed to be resting and in bed." Harry sat down on the edge of the couch, not sure if his legs could carry him any longer. He suspected that Snape wasn't pleased with him but he didn't care. He couldn't contain his smile as he said.

"I walked here." It came out as a whisper but still a proud one. Suddenly a hand came to rest on his shoulder and it tightened painfully as Snape growled.

"Has your stupidity reared its ugly head again or have the lack of medication gone straight to what remains of your brain, Potter? What part of rest don't you understand?"

Thoroughly annoyed and feeling something tighten inside of him every time Snape called him Potter, Harry tried to pull loose as he said. "Yeah so do you!"

Snape exhaled harshly again and then said, apparently forcing himself to calm. "Yes, but that is not the point, we were talking about you."

"You were fast asleep. You didn't even wake up when I knocked my way into the living room. I may have made a mess of your bedroom but I can't be sure because I can't see it. You apparently needed it. And I took a second nap on the couch before dinner arrived."

Snape sighed again and then said. "You're an idiot, Potter."

"Why are you doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"Calling me Potter?"

"It is your name, isn't it?" Snape could be infuriating sometimes.

"But you started calling me Harry. I liked it better than being called Potter."

"I called you Potter before and you never minded it then. You have bigger worries than what I'm calling you." And with those words Snape got up and brushed past Harry. Harry sighed, yeah he did but he couldn't deny that it stung when Snape went back to calling him Potter.

Hp

The food smelled good and his stomach grumbled as Severus sat up. He ignored Potter and smirked at the steaming food in front of him. The house elves had outdone themselves. They had served him a chicken soup with some bread and for the main course they had given him a piece of a roast with mashed potatoes and gravy. It smelled divine.

"That smells good." Potter said, Severus ignored him. He leaned forward to take a bowl of soup. It was seasoned the way he liked it and he ate hungrily.

He noticed how Potter sniffled at his side, an almost eager look on his face as he shifted slightly. The younger male licked his lips almost eagerly and Severus had to tear his eyes away, he was furious with himself. He distracted himself with buttering his bread and dipping it in the bowl of soup.

The soup was delicious. Severus never found himself caring for soup but while he had been in St. Mungo's it had been all he could swallow. He had developed a taste for it then. He licked his lips when he finished the piece of bread. He set the bowl down for a moment and then Potter asked.

"Severus…"

"Professor!" Severus snapped instantly and he ignored the way his heart clenched painfully at the flash of pain that crossed Potter's face for a moment. He wasn't going to pity Potter. Soon Potter would realize that he could do a whole lot better than Severus and the moment the apprenticeship was over he would leave. No, it was better that Severus stop this thing or whatever was between them now before it got too out of hand.

"Oh…okay…I just thought…"

"You thought what?" His voice came out sharper than he intended to and he noticed the way Potter swallowed.

"Nothing... it isn't important sir…" Severus pretended that it didn't bother him the way Harry looked away. The younger man shuffled to the other side of the couch, as far away from Severus as possible as he curled in on himself. Severus ignored him, reaching to take another sip of his soup. He had more pressing concerns than a wounded Potter, namely eating.

The silence between them was tense. Severus found himself uncomfortable. It had been a while since this had happened. When Potter had been in the Infirmary the silence between them had been easy and he had been able to relax; now he was tense and uncomfortable.

Anger churned in his gut and he felt ready to snap. But what perhaps the worst thing was was that he was responsible. He was intent on destroying this thing whatever was between him and Potter. Severus was not good for Potter. He had nothing to give to the boy and it was better that his apprentice learned it sooner rather than later before he truly got hurt.

He stared down at the bowl of soup. There was still a bit of soup left but he knew that if he finished it he wouldn't be able to finish the main course. So he set the bowl down. The soup had been delicious but he liked the main course more.

Potter perked up the moment of the bowl being set on the table. The younger male had been subdued and had curled in on himself but now he glanced at the table. Severus noticed the eager and almost hungry look on his apprentice face.

Potter cleared his throat and then whispered. "Professor, can I have some soup?"

Severus contemplated the request. His first instinct was to refuse Potter but he knew the boy hadn't eaten in a while. Poppy had spelled nutrition potions directly into his stomach and while they had discussed the use of potions they had never talked about Harry going back to eating.

He smiled nastily and then said. "There is no soup left. It was too good to share."

Potter was silent and even though the bond in his mind buzzed because his apprentice was in pain, Severus resisted the urge to apologize. He had to remain strong for Potter's sake. Yes, the bond could grow stronger between them and he could take Potter as a lover but it wouldn't do to get used to something that would only be there for a short time.

No, he would stick to his plan and that was to keep his distance from Potter. He reached for the plate of food but Potter stopped him when he whispered brokenly.

"What did I do?"

"Excuse me?" Severus turned to face his apprentice.

"I asked what did I do to make you go back to hating me. I tried so hard, Professor…I…I did everything that you and Madam Pomfrey told me. I…am sorry for whatever I did….what can I do to make it better?"

He hadn't been prepared for that but he knew that he shouldn't allow Harry to get upset. He preferred his apprentice angry. He could deal with an angry Potter but not with a broken one. He sighed harshly and then set the plate down.

"Is this about the soup? Is that what you're so upset about? That I won't share a bowl of soup with you? I hardly think that the soup was that important but if you want some you can just tell me. There is no reason to become so upset about this."

He saw the moment Harry got angry as his apprentice hissed. "Upset? I'm not upset about the soup, _sir!_ I'm upset because I thought that we had finally made some headway but apparently I'm wrong. This morning you were all over me, literally and now I can't do anything right, so yeah I'm upset…"

A coughing fit stopped Potter's rant and the young wizard bend over. Severus sighed and then conjured a glass of water which he thrust at Harry. The younger male ignored it and Severus floated it over to Harry. His apprentice glared at him before he shook his head.

Severus supressed a growl and held the green eyes. "Dammit, Potter, don't be an idiot and accept the water."

"Stop calling me Potter!" Harry snarled in between coughs. Severus' dark eyes narrowed at his insolence. They were involved in a staring match and he was going to be damned if he was going to be the first to look away.

"Would you rather I call you idiot as you expire from lack of oxygen because you refuse to take a drink?" He asked harshly, sending the glass towards Potter again. The younger male finally gave in and grabbed the glass to take a sip.

All the anger seemed to leave him suddenly and asked, sipping the water on occasion as he glanced up at Severus through his fringe. "What did I do wrong? I thought we were getting along and now this…"

Potter sounded so broken that Severus felt his heart clench and he sighed. His apprentice deserved at least an explanation and he finally said. "You have done nothing wrong…"

"That is bullshit! I must have done something wrong else you wouldn't go back to hating me. Didn't you like the kiss this morning? I know I haven't had that much practise but I can do better. I'm a fast learner…"

The horror he felt at that one statement made him snap out. "Of course it wasn't that, Potter! Could you be any more of an idiot?" He forced himself to be calm. It wouldn't do to shout at Potter. He pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger as he gathered his thoughts and said.

"It wasn't the kiss, Potter, Harry…It was what it implies. I'm not a good person for you. I can be your master but not your lover. You deserve somebody who is more your age and who can give you all the attention you need. I am not that person. I'm a paranoid man who does not share well. If you are entangled with me, I do not release lightly."

"Perhaps I don't want to be released, have you ever thought of that, Severus? I kissed you because I liked you, not because I'm settling….and about that entangling, perhaps I don't want you to let me go." The comment was soft but Severus heard it all the same. The sigh escaped him without thinking and he reached for the soup bowl.

"Fine, here, have your soup. There is no need to resort to mental blackmail in order to make me feel guilty." He held out the bowl for Harry after casting a warming charm on it. Harry's gentle smile did funny things to his stomach as his apprentice said.

"I can give you a kiss for it."

"And there is no need to resort to bribery either." Severus took the plate back and tucked in. He tried to ignore the way his heart beat just a little bit faster by the look of happiness on Harry's face as he sipped the lukewarm soup. He knew he would have trouble with sticking to his plans because that Harry's happiness already meant too much to him. He was royally screwed.

**I hope you liked it. This chapter was pretty long, longer than I expected so I've divided it into another part. Review please.**

**In the next chapter: Severus might think that he can stick to his plan to keep his distance from Harry but he isn't prepared for a determined Gryffindor who plans to make his master see that Severus is the one he wants. And how will Harry go about it? He may have defeated a Dark Lord but seducing a Potions Master is a whole other business? And can Severus keep his cool during the talk with Neville and Draco regarding the teaching assistant positions? That and more in: plans **


	22. plans

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter.**

**Note: Thanks for the reviews. I know it has been a long time since I last updated but I'm a junior in college and that means it is insanely busy and any time I have off is spend sleeping. But anyway, let's begin.**

It started with a prickling along the back of his neck as Severus bent over his desk to try and make sense of his notes he had jotted down earlier. Apparently exhaustion did not agree with him because he could not make sense of his own writing. He pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes as he breathed out deeply.

He turned around to regard Potter who he had left on the couch. His apprentice was seated on the couch after their small dinner. It was getting late but so far Harry had not shown any signs of weariness yet.

_Well no more than usual at least._ Severus was used to seeing his apprentice exhausted but Harry appeared more active today than he had been previously. A part of Severus was glad to see the young Gryffindor finally gaining some energy back, but a hidden part, a part he was not acknowledging, wanted his apprentice for himself. He wanted Harry to get well but it would eventually mean that Harry no longer needed him, and he was not so sure if he liked that.

_Unless you take Harry as your lover. He's never been touched by anybody else. You would be the first and that always leaves an impression. You can teach him and make him yours…_

Severus nearly snarled at himself to shut up. It was not an option he could consider. Harry was young and confused. He was hurt and wounded. He didn't know what he wanted. It wasn't strange that he was reaching out to the first person that was kind to him. Normally a young man of Harry's age would be dating and meeting lovers. Harry had the same urges, despite being wounded. This was a time for discovery and Harry was wounded so why would it be strange that he reached out to somebody that was close to him?

Their apprenticeship bond between them forced them to be close regardless of any other unresolved feelings. Severus had resolved his feelings concerning his hatred towards Harry. If this apprenticeship had taught him anything was that Harry was not who he seemed. But there were times that Harry Potter still managed to make his blood boil, such as now.

Severus turned around in one fluid motion. Harry's gaze was on the fire but Severus was confident that it had been on him a moment ago. He stared at Harry for a long moment, unsure if he needed to say anything.

Harry glanced up as if sensing his gaze and raised an eyebrow. Severus turned around again. He held himself tensely, aware of Harry's gaze on him. He tried to focus on the papers in front of him. He needed to come up with a teacher plan, especially if he intended to talk to Longbottom and Draco.

"What are you doing?" Harry's voice was not a welcoming distraction and Severus blew out sharply through his nose.

"Nothing that requires your attention. Should you not be in bed already?"

"I'm not tired yet…" Harry's voice continued to have that slightly hoarse quality which told Severus that he was not healed as much as he should be. Or as much as Severus would like to see him healed. He once again did not acknowledge what that voice did to him.

"You have had a long day and it would be wise to go to bed. I refuse to deal with a cranky Potter in the morning because you did not get enough sleep." He made his voice sharp.

"Says the man whose temper even made people less afraid of Voldemort than you…"

"Excuse me? Are you comparing me to the Dark Lord?" There was a note of disbelief in his voice as he turned to regard his apprentice. He wasn't even sure if he should feel angry or not. Harry grinned at him.

"No, I wouldn't dare to compare you to him. But I dare you to go out in the corridor and ask any student and I guarantee you that they will be shaking in their shoes. If you mention the name Voldemort or the name Snape in the Great Hall the students will be more afraid of you. And I get why you would want the students to be afraid of you as well."

"You do?" Severus raised an eyebrow. Harry's grin widened and he nodded.

"Yeah, I know that you don't want them to know what you are really like..."

"Oh and pray tell, what am I really like according to you? "

"I'm not even sure if I should say this cause I think that you will kill me if I do…"

"If you do not say it then I'll kill you and make sure nobody ever finds your body." Severus snarled and instead of getting upset as he had expected, Harry merely smiled. That smile was doing funny things to him.

"You're brave, honourable, and loyal. You are courageous and you can actually be sweet and kind…"

"I think that explosion has addled your brains somehow, Potter because if you confuse me for a sweet person then you must be really messed up, even more so than I realized. Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to do. You can write down your compliments in a letter and I'll read them later." He turned around, not only because he did indeed have work to do but also because he was sure that despite Harry's poor eyesight, his apprentice could see the blush that stained his cheeks.

Hp

Harry was being ignored and he knew it. Yet it didn't bother him that much. He had enjoyed teasing Severus. Perhaps it could even be called flirting. Not that he would ever dare to use that word in regards to Severus.

He yawned and stretched, enjoying a moment to relax. Today had been a good day and he didn't want it to end. He was tired, there was no denying that but he didn't want to sleep alone. He knew that was what Snape was thinking. That it was time to allow Harry to sleep alone again.

He wondered what he could do to change his master's mind. He was going to have fun trying though. He slowly sent his magic out again, searching for Snape's magic as it brushed against him. It was complex but it felt oddly intimate as their magic brushed. He tried to ignore the odd feeling in his stomach. He had never been this aware of magic as he was now and it seemed to deepen each day.

He closed his eyes, focussing on his magic as he brushed it against Snape's again, even when the older wizard seemed to draw it tighter around himself. To Harry it seemed like everybody was surrounded by his or her own magic, something he had known all his life but had never felt this keenly. All afternoon he had felt Hermione's and Ron's magic brush up against his. Snape's magic had been more complex than the magic of these two best friends. Harry didn't know if it was because Snape was older and therefore had more time to hone his magic or because his master was a very powerful wizard.

"Harry?" Harry glanced up at the call of his name. He had Snape's attention now it seemed.

"Yes?"

"I thought I told you not to distract me."

"Oh, was I doing that?" He could almost imagine Snape's look and he pulled his magic back slightly. He didn't want to distract Snape too much. He knew the man's temper and he didn't want to rouse it. Not if he intended to sleep in his bed later.

He closed his eyes briefly, sending his magic out in the other direction and away from Snape. He tried to summon some things to him. He wasn't sure if he was successful because he couldn't see anything that was floating towards him. He sighed, deeply frustrated with himself.

He told himself to focus again and whispered. "_Accio _parchment."

He was rewarded as a piece of parchment hit his hand. He grinned, pleased at himself. Finally something that was going right. He sat up, crushing the parchment in hand. He hoped it was blank. He was quite sure that Snape would have been breathing down his neck had there been any important information on it.

Since his master seemed to be caught up in his work, Harry began ripping up the parchment. He rolled them into balls and began by levitating them in the air. It was a good exercise of his magic, keeping himself occupied and his mind at the task.

Soon he had all paper balls in the air, spinning them slowly. He closed his eyes, aware of the presence of the balls even when he couldn't see them. He began to spin them faster, delighting in the game and the control of his magic. Finally he was in control of something. It was a good feeling.

He opened his eyes, turning towards Snape. He could only hear the scratching of Snape's quill as the Potion Master jotted something down. Snape seemed to be lost in thought and Harry smiled at the comfortable silence. It was nice that Snape wasn't paying attention to him for a moment and Harry brought his paper balls closer to his master with his magic.

He let them hover above Snape's head, trying to keep them high enough so he wouldn't bother Snape. A cough escaped them and his paper balls wobbled. It was hard to keep the balls floating in the air and try not to break out into coughs at the same time. Eventually the coughing won and the balls fell from the air and onto Snape.

"Potter!"

Normally Harry would have answered but he needed all his concentration on getting his breath back. A cup of water was pressed into his hand and he took a grateful sip. The coughing subsided and he took a deep breath. He glanced up as Snape leaned closer to him.

"I think that it is time for bed seeing as I keep getting distracted from my work." Harry grimaced as he finished the cup. He glanced up at Snape, in vain trying to bite back a smile. Snape's dark hair was littered with the small paper balls. He reached out, snatching one away and Snape glanced down at him.

"I'm glad to see that you're feeling better. Apparently you must be feeling well if you are annoying me. I So I was correct that you had showered me in parchment. Do you really have nothing better to do with your time than play around with such things? I will have to find you something else to occupy your time with."

"You can occupy my time. I bet that there are a number of things that you can teach me." Harry wasn't sure what made him say it but it slipped out. Snape froze beside him and Harry could almost imagine the sharp eyes upon him.

"And do I dare ask what kind of things you wish to learn? Normally I fail to teach you anything. I am almost afraid to find out what you think I can teach you."

"You're my master…you can teach me anything you think is important that I should know." Harry allowed his eyes to drift down Snape's body. Actually there was only one thing he was interested in at the moment. But he was afraid to ask, afraid to be rejected. No, better to take it one small step at a time.

"You must be delirious with exhaustion because you are rambling. I think it is time for bed."

"Some of those things that you can teach me can happen in bed as well." This time there was a tension in Snape's body. Harry could literally feel the temperature in the room drop. Snape's voice was silky and dangerous as his master spoke.

"I think that it is high time that you go to your own bed, Potter."

Harry gritted his teeth. "Why? Because I express something I desire. You told me that I could request things that I wanted to be taught but when I do, you tell me no."

"I'm your master and therefore I know what it is you require. And you do not require _that_. When you are healed and you still express the same desire, perhaps in due time we can see what I can teach you. But now it is not the time. " This time Snape sounded angry.

"So you would send me from your bed and deny any comfort that it may bring us both just because you don't want us to have sex?" Harry didn't care how hard his voice sounded. He wanted to understand what Snape was saying. He however was not prepared when Snape leaned in and Harry could feel the man's breath on his face. His heart started racing, sure that a kiss would follow.

"You are really selfish, Potter. Has it ever occurred to you that I do not want you in such a way? You think that you have got me all figured out but you are wrong. I am not a kind man and I do not care about others. I only care about myself and I do not want a scrawny runt like you. So take a hint, Potter and sleep in your own bed tonight."

With those harsh words, Snape rose from the couch and Harry was alone in the room. His eyes burned but he didn't care. If Snape thought that this would make Harry back off, then he was sorely mistaken and he was going to show his master what he would be missing out on. Because one thing was for sure, Harry Potter never gave up.

Hp

It was perhaps an hour after Severus had left Potter in the living-room that found Severus in bed and tossing and turning. After staring up at the ceiling for too long Severus threw back the covers. He was angry, not at Potter but at himself. He was a fool. He knew he had handled the situation badly. But Potter never listened to him. No, it was better to be harsh and crush his hopes than have Potter think he wanted Severus.

_Potter is young and when this apprenticeship is over he will move on. I cannot expect him to commit for life. Yes, we can have a good time and it would be nice to have a lover and I have no doubt that he will make a good lover but it is too soon. No, I just have to be firm and hopefully Potter can finally focus on getting better and not on chasing me. _

He wondered if Potter went to bed yet or if he was still in the living room. It would not surprise Severus since his apprentice would not know his way around here; Potter still had trouble with his sight. It would only be right to escort Potter to his rooms.

Upon entering the living room Severus found his apprentice fast asleep on the couch. He sighed, this might get a little bit more difficult than he had imagined. He shook Potter, ignoring the way Potter curled towards his hand.

"Come on, Harry, it is time for bed."

Harry blinked up at him sleepily, the green eyes hazy and his lips stretched in a smile. He seemed glad to see Severus. Severus helped him to sit up and set him to his feet. Potter leaned heavily upon him but when Severus would have led the way to Harry's bedroom, the younger wizard resisted.

"Please, one more night…"

"No, Harry, you need to be in your own bed tonight…"

"Just one more night. Last night…please…sir." Severus wasn't sure what it was, if it was the green eyes or the way Harry looked at him but he gave in and led Harry to his bedroom and into his bed, even as he told himself it would only be one last time.

Hp

Harry frowned when he woke up. He pushed against the restraints around his chest sleepily, trying to find a comfortable spot so he could go back to sleep. It was almost as though there was an iron band around his chest but it wasn't hard to breath. He shook his head, trying to clear the fog from his mind.

He struggled but even then the restraints wouldn't go away. It really wasn't comfortable and sighing harshly, Harry tried to sit up. He found he couldn't and finally opened his eyes. Not that it would do him any good but this was getting ridiculous. He had to figure out what was going on.

Perhaps he had rolled himself up in his blankets or something else but usually his blankets moved when he tried to. He pushed firmly and somebody groaned behind him. That made Harry pause. Apparently he wasn't alone in his bed.

He turned around, feeling around with his hand to feel an arm around his waist. He was being held rather tightly. That could only be one person and Harry had to bite back a smile. Apparently Snape had decided that Harry was allowed to sleep in his bed. All Harry remembered from last night was that Snape didn't want Harry to sleep in his bed and after that he didn't remember anything. He must have fallen asleep on the couch because he couldn't remember going to bed.

He elbowed Snape lightly. He didn't want to wake the older wizard but he needed a little bit more room to breathe and to move. Snape tightened his grip and Harry made a sound of protest. Apparently that did the trick because Snape rolled over onto his other side, leaving Harry suddenly alone and cold on his side of the bed.

_This isn't exactly what I wanted. I just wanted a little bit more room to move and not to be left alone completely. Guess I have to rectify the situation myself. I at least want the blankets back. _

Harry turned around and pulled on the blankets Snape had rolled around himself. The blankets held fast and Harry sighed. Guess, he would have to come up with something else. He instead pushed himself against Snape's back, slipping his arms around the narrow waist of the Potions Master. He cuddled in closer, trying to remain warm.

He began to shiver as the cold dungeon air began to settle against his skin. He burrowed deeper into Snape's warmth, desperately trying to get at least an inch of blankets. Suddenly a hand covered his own and Snape turned onto his back in a fluid motion, pulling Harry against his chest with his other arm. Next the blanket was pulled over him and Harry lay still.

He was almost afraid to move out of fear of waking Snape. Surely the older wizard must be awake because he knew that Snape was not a deep sleeper.

Harry relaxed slowly; afraid that at any moment Snape would wake up and send him to his own side of the bed. He laid his head against Snape's chest, enjoying the soft sounds of breathing and the heartbeat underneath his ear. It lulled him back to sleep.

"Are you warm enough now?"

Harry was wide awake in an instant and he would have moved away if Snape had not held fast. He glanced up, even when he couldn't see his master's face through the darkness and his bad vision.

He nodded, not really comfortable with saying anything. He wasn't even sure what he could say. He was comfortable at the moment and that was really all that mattered. He longed for more sleep and he wondered if Snape would throw him from his bed now.

Apparently not because the Potions Master's hand splayed over his back and he was pushed against Snape's chest. "Get some sleep."

Snape's deep voice rumbled through his chest and Harry yawned. He was tired but it was hard to sleep because of the close proximity of Snape. He wondered if Snape was asleep. His master's breathing was deep and even but that didn't tell Harry if Snape had fallen back asleep or not. It soothed him and finally he fell into a deep slumber.

Hp

Sleep seemed to find Harry quickly but Severus lay awake a moment longer. Sleep seemed to elude him and he pulled Harry closer as his apprentice stirred. He had slept briefly but deeply but it had refreshed him more than he had thought possible. But now sleep eluded him.

He sighed. He hadn't anticipated lying awake all night. He ran a hand down Harry's back as the younger man stirred. Harry needed the sleep just as much as Severus did. It had been a while since Severus had shared a bed with anyone but it was different with Harry. He was getting addicted to Harry's presence in his bed and that scared him more than he dared to admit.

He knew he was not a catch, if anything he would be a burden and he did not want that for Harry. He knew of the Gryffindor's loyalty and while he would be Harry's first and he would make it good for Harry it would guarantee that Harry would never forget him. He did not want that for his brave apprentice. Severus hardly ever shared his lovers or let them go but he could not chain Harry to him because he wanted different things for his future than Harry did.

No, it would be best to stick to his current plan, no matter how hard it may be.

Severus didn't realize how hard it was when he woke up the next morning. Harry was pressed tightly against him, his hips pressed against Severus' thigh. Harry lay against the length of his flank and much to Severus' horror he found that his hand was pressed against Harry's arse.

Harry groaned softly as he shifted before falling into a slumber again. Severus bit back his own groan. This would not do. Harry would be mortified if he found himself pressed against Severus. A Severus who was hard as a rock.

His hand itched to do something about his arousal but he would not do that with Harry so close and still asleep. He balled his fist and allowed his mind to go blank. There had been plenty of times in the past when he had to fight his body's urges. This would be no different now, except the object of his desire lay closer than normal.

Harry groaned again and rolled over onto his other side before rolling back against Severus, throwing a leg over his stomach and an arm over his chest before falling back to sleep. Severus was left sputtering and unable to stir if he didn't want to wake Harry. He sighed loudly, trying in vain to move Harry away or to roll him over to the other side. If Harry moved his leg but a fraction he would feel Severus' arousal.

Harry's hand moved over his chest, stroking it and Severus bit back a curse. If this continued he wouldn't be able to take it. He clasped a hand over Harry's hand to hold it in place. Harry seemed to settle in and went back to deeper sleep. Severus heaved a sigh of relief. If only he could command his cock to behave as well because otherwise it was going to be an even longer night.

Hp

Harry's dreams were vivid as he imagined a hot tongue licking him in the right spots, a hand stroking his cock to completion as he gasped against thin lips. He bucked his hips, craving more friction to get off. He wanted to get off, he was so hard and aroused and that hand felt familiar and so good.

He wanted this, no he _needed _it. He moaned softly, drawing in the air desperately as he sought to recapture the lips that were teasing him. The next moment somebody beside him shifted and Harry woke up with a gasp.

He was disoriented for a moment and he glanced around. The bed was empty and he was tangled in the sheets. There were no lights in the room and Harry dropped his head with a groan. He listened closely for Snape's presence, confused for a moment of where the older wizard was until he heard the shower run. Snape must be in the shower.

_I guess that's my luck. I doubt he would be very keen if I was busy humping his leg. Perhaps I can finish this before he gets back…I suppose I'll have to hurry up then._

Harry rolled onto his back and ran a hand down his chest. He had to be careful with trying to be as still as possible and by not hurting his hands. He thrust a hand down his boxers and fisted his cock. His dream came back to him, of thin lips kissing him hungrily, slender hands running down his body and fisting his cock and of a deep voice telling him all kinds of wicked things.

Two strokes were all it took and Harry came in a rush of heat and the whisper of his master's name. He gasped loudly, hoping that nobody could hear him. There was no sound from the bathroom except for the sound of running water and Harry relaxed. It was at times like these that he longed for a wand to hide the evidence of his activities.

He rolled back onto his stomach and drew the blankets over him. He had a plan to think up on how to convince Snape that he wanted the man and it would mostly likely be harder than anything else he had done. Because if his master was anything, it was stubborn.

Hp

The shower relaxed Severus in ways he had not thought possible. He didn't have to think during his shower but thoughts kept straying to Harry and how the Gryffindor looked when he had laid dishevelled in Severus' bed.

Severus groaned as his own erection came back with a vengeance. Perhaps he needed to deal with this. It didn't take long and he had to swallow back Harry's name as he came. It had been a while and he allowed the shower to wash away any evidence of his desire.

The edge he had been feeling for a while seemed to be gone as he dried himself quickly and dressed. He walked back into the bedroom on soft feet, glancing towards the bed on his way out. Harry seemed to be fast asleep and Severus smiled. Let his apprentice sleep a while longer. Harry needed all the rest he could get.

He quickly took out his robes and put them on, trying to be as quite as possible. He did not wish to wake Harry.

"Sev'rus?" Harry's sleepy murmur told him he had not been entirely successful. He finished dressing and turned around, not prepared for the delightful picture Harry made in his bed and how quickly arousal curled in his belly and made his cock respond.

Harry's hair was sleep mussed, or sex mussed as if somebody had run his hands through it. The green eyes were bright despite the fact that Harry yawned. Harry stretched, causing his shirt to ride up to expose the pale stomach with a treasure trail that Severus longed to follow with his tongue.

He resisted the urge by looking away as he finished buttoning his sleeves and said. "Yes?"

"Are you leaving?" Harry yawned again and Severus nodded.

"Yes, unlike some I cannot afford to loiter around in bed all day…" He smirked, taking the sting out of his words as he continued. "Because I have an appointment with Mr Malfoy and Mr Longbottom concerning you actually…"

Harry looked a little bit taken aback as he whispered. "Me?"

"Yes, well not directly you but in a fashion. I need to come up with a plan to keep my classes on track as I take my responsibility as your master. You know that under normal circumstances you would have been taking over some of my lower year classes but as you need me by your side in the healing process, as is my duty, something needs to be done about my classes. Therefore, I need adequate people to take over my lower year classes."

"And you chose Neville for that?" Harry's grin was teasing and it lifted Severus' heart to see him finally feeling better.

In the past few days Harry had been so still and so exhausted that it had taken all of his willpower not to shake some sense into Harry. Harry couldn't help it, it was the nature of his injuries and it was also partly to blame on the Dreamless Sleep. Apparently the visit of his friends had cheered Harry up as well.

_Something good came from their presence then. I suppose if Weasley and Granger learned of this, I will not be able to keep them out. But I suppose that they can serve their purpose and watch Harry for me. I do not want to call Poppy away from her duties and while I do not like the idea of three Gryffindors alone in my quarters, it is too much of a hassle to take Harry someplace else. No, I'll simply have to hope that my reputation will keep them from doing any mischief, because I will not be held responsible for my actions if something does happen in my quarters._

"Ready to get up? I imagine that Granger and Weasley will be here in a few minutes."

Harry frowned at him and Severus smirked.

"You need people to watch you so I have asked your friends to do it. You may thank me for it later."

Harry merely shrugged and asked. "And that means I have to be out of bed if they arrive. They have seen me in beds before…"

"They have not seen you in my bed. So hurry up…"

In the end it still took about 30 minutes before Harry was ready but Severus managed to get him situated on the couch in front of the fire in the living room. Harry seemed to be ready to nap again and Severus could not blame him. He could do with a nap himself. But as usual he pushed aside his weariness and carried on.

Granger and Weasley were loud and obnoxious as always but as usual Severus tuned them out.

"Alright, I am off. Do not set fire to my quarters, do not do anything I would not do in here and Merlin help me, if anything happens that should not happen while you two are in here, I'll make sure that your bodies are never found. And believe me, I have my ways. Now, if you will excuse me, I shall be back in a few hours."

"No kiss?" Severus shot Harry a murderous look at the mentioning.

"No, I'm not sure if you deserve one." It may just be teasing but that was one thing Severus would not stand for and it was this. There was no reason to kiss Harry, no matter how much he wanted to.

Hp

That comment stung more than Harry would have thought. He was taken aback by the ice in Snape's voice and he bit his lip. He was not going to cry. He may wear his heart on his sleeve but he knew Snape and he knew how mean his master could be if he put his mind to it.

Hermione was bustling about the room, no doubt looking at Snape's books. Ron was seated beside him, glancing up at him as he grinned.

"So, hungry, Harry?"

Harry shook his head.

"Can you even eat something, mate? Or is it just liquids?"

Harry shrugged. "I don't really know….Snape gave me some soup yesterday and I had some tea but it has all been weak and without much flavour. " Harry coughed weakly. His voice sounded slightly better and he didn't break out in coughs very few words so he was slowly improving.

"Why don't I go down to the kitchen to get some soup? I'm sure that there is something out there that you can eat." Ron was nearly bursting with impatienceness and Harry had to bite back a grin. Food always made Ron happy.

Now that he thought about it, he was slightly peckish. He nodded. Ron grinned and slapped his shoulder lightly.

"Okay, good choice, mate. I'll be right back. See you in a few minutes, Hermione…." Harry could practically hear them kissing before Ron disappeared out of the door.

It didn't take long before Hermione was seated beside him on the couch, a book in hand. "So, want to tell me what is going on between you and Professor Snape? You seemed kind of tense this morning."

Trust in Hermione to pick up on that. Harry shrugged and said. "I don't know. We had a fight, I guess…"

"What happened?"

"I…." Harry didn't want to tell anything but then the story burst out of him. "I like him, Hermione….I mean I really like him. But he….he won't take any chance with me. I think he just rejected me and it fucking hurts… I don't even know what to do. He keeps saying that I will change my mind. But I don't think I will. And even if I do, why won't he take a chance on us?"

"Harry, you have known Professor Snape for years now. He was in love with Lily for most of those years… You know how loyal he is. I do not know if he has any feelings for you but if he does and he loves that deeply, then you leaving him may destroy him." Hermione's words made sense but Harry knew his master better. He shook his head.

"He may love deeply, Hermione but he cannot love that deeply for all those years and still be this strong. He would be destroyed by that if he had loved my mother for years in the way you think. He….it doesn't make any sense. He loved what my mother represented, a friend and somebody who always supported him. But that man can be so stubborn… "

Hermione giggled. "You do pick impossible men to fall for, Harry…"

Harry sputtered. "Excuse me…By my calculations I only ever felt this way about only one man…"

"Harry, you really expect me to believe that you never had a thing for Draco Malfoy? Ron may not notice these things but I certainly do…" Harry shook his head. He wasn't going to admit to anything.

Hermione patted his hand and softly said. "You know it isn't a shame, Harry. If you happen to like men more than you like women that is fine. It would explain so much actually but it is fine, honestly…."

"But men don't happen to like me back." It just burst out. Harry couldn't help it. He quickly closed his mouth as Hermione took his hand and squeezed gently.

"Harry, I think that you may just be wrong about that. Professor Snape has hardly left your side in the past few days…."

"Because it is his duty, Hermione. He made that very clear. He's not interested in me. He doesn't care about me other than the fact that I'm his apprentice. He won't cross that final line…."

"What final line, Harry?"

Frustrated Harry ran a hand through his hair before he whispered. "An apprenticeship bond is a very close bond between a master and his apprentice. It can even happen that they become lovers; sometimes they even end up married. Not that I want to marry Severus but….it would be nice to have somebody like that and I do genuinely like him. But I don't know the reason why he refuses to do this. I mean, I know I'm hurt and need to recover and I want to focus on that but it is nice to do that without having to worry about this…"

_A fine mess, I'm in. Of course I fall in love with Snape, a man so stubborn a donkey could learn something from him. He'll never change his mind. I always fall for the weird ones._

"Harry, the only advice I can give you is don't give up. I do think that he really likes you; otherwise he would have been acting differently. Because if Professor Snape doesn't care about you he would never have cared for you in the way he has and he would never have taken you in. Perhaps you need to out stubborn him and show him what he's been missing out on. And if I know you that is one thing you're good at."

Harry shared a smile with Hermione. She was right, that was one of the things he was good at, being stubborn.

Hp

_Longbottom had changed a lot._ _He's not as nervous and afraid of me as he once was. He did face a Dark Lord so I am not surprised._

Severus contemplated both boys that were seated before him in his office. Draco was leaning back in his chair, relaxed and Longbottom was leaning forward, almost eagerly.

"You must be wondering why I have called you here, together. I have a proposal for you both, a task of sorts for extra curriculum." Severus pushed two pieces of parchments to both Draco and Longbottom. He held up his hand when Draco wanted to turn his around.

"Just wait a moment and let me explain. You know of my own injury and you know of Harry's problems. Harry has been severely injured and his recovery time may be longer than we first anticipated. My duty is with him and Harry will take up most of my time. Seeing as I am not as recovered as much as I would have liked and one of Harry's duties's as my apprentice would be to teach some of the younger classes, this duty falls to another. This concerns the first, second and third year classes for Defence. It will be supervising the classes and grading some of the essays."

Severus took a deep breath and then regarded the young men before him. Both were watching him, waiting for him to continue. Severus nodded at the parchment.

"On the parchment before you is an assistant teacher contract. It is a position that will give you a learning experience at being a Professor here at Hogwarts and handling students and the work pressure. I will not lie to you, it will be hard work but I have faith that you can do this."

Neville was the first to speak as he asked. "Professor Snape, I'm very honoured that you would think of me for this position but may I ask why?"

"Professor Sprout told me that you are interested in pursuing a career in Herbology and perhaps even become her apprentice. You can use the experience, Mr Longbottom, especially should you not like teaching then this may be a great experiment."

Neville nodded. "That sounds fair, Professor. So it is just the Defence lower year classes?"

"Yes, it is just the lower year Defence classes." Severus wondered when Neville would say no. He could not blame him. He had been nothing but nasty to Neville and while there had been a time when Neville could have tried harder it did not always explain Severus' behaviour towards the young Gryffindor.

He had been nasty and he was not going to apologize for that. There had been a time when his behaviour had been nasty to everybody. If he had to apologize to everybody then he would have to spend the remainder of his life doing just that. And that was not something he wanted to do.

"Well, Professor, I accept. It sounds like an amazing opportunity and I really appreciate the chance that you have given me. I have a lot more free time than I had before because Professor Sprout does not have that much for me to do yet. Some of the greenhouses were damaged in the fight and while we are restoring them I cannot really help much with that. So yes, please, I would welcome the chance to do something to help the younger years and besides…."

Severus glanced up sharply as Neville leaned forward and continued.

"I do really want to help you and Harry. I know that Harry has been having a rough time and I wanted to find a way to help out for a while now. But I never really knew what to do. If this is a way that I can help, then yes gladly."

"Thank you very much, Mr Longbottom. Professor McGonagall has set up the assistant teaching contract before you. If you would be so kind to sign it. Now Draco, have you given any thought about my offer?"

"I have, Professor and I would like to decline."

Severus had to do a double take. He had not expected that from Draco.

"And can you give me a reason on why you are declining?"

"Well, you see, Professor Snape, Professor McGonagall made me a better offer for a position as a teacher assistant. She has asked me to assist in all of your classes and in the Transfiguration classes. Sadly, I cannot sign two contracts. So I'll have to decline your offer but I will assist you in everything."

_Sometimes that old cat can still be quite fast. It would be nice if she consulted me about this before she did things like this. No surprise that the school was such a mess last year if this is our current communication process. I will have to talk to her about this. We need to discuss this before we make decisions like this._

He nodded, "Well that is settled then."

"Professor Snape?"

"Yes, Mr Longbottom?"

"Am I going to be the only teacher assistant?" Severus shook his head as he handed Longbottom a quill.

"No, I asked Miss Granger and Mr Weasley as well. They are with Harry now but I am confident that they will say yes. I'll brief you later in the week on what classes to take and during the first week I shall supervise you. I'll not let you face a class alone, don't worry."

Neville grinned at him and Severus asked. "Thank you both for agreeing to do this for me. Had the circumstances been different I would have asked Harry to take over these classes as is his duty as my apprentice."

"How is Harry doing, Professor?"

Severus wasn't sure on how to answer that. Harry seemed to be doing alright at the moment but he was still sleeping a lot and not very active. He spends most of his time trying to chat Severus up. Not that Severus minded. It was a vast improvement over seeing Harry lying so still in bed.

He was interrupted by a knock on the door and called out an absent minded enter. His eyes narrowed in a glare as he found Minerva standing in front of the door. She smiled at him and said.

"Severus, there is somebody here to see you."

"Perhaps it can wait. I will finish this and then I shall go see about Harry. I'll be available in an hour or so."

"Oh, Severus, I think that this is a visitor that you want to see. He came here especially for you and Harry. He's from the guild."

And Severus found himself getting to his feet quickly. Yes, this was important.

**I'm leaving you hanging here. Please review. **

**In the next chapter: Severus gets an unexpected offer from the guild concerning both Harry and him. What will he do? And how will Harry react when he has to share Severus with another Potions Master? That and more in: visitors. **


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